There's always a little romantic tension between a boy and a girl who are only friends, but this girl takes her desire to be with her friend a little too far.
I'll join the chorus of people saying it was way too quick.
I agree that many stories can be too long winded and they can lose their readers. I really love the gentle vore stories between people who have affection for one another. But that sort of story has to be based in that relationship and how that emotional relationship is about to evolve, Giving that short shrift is a tragedy.
Author's Response:
Fine, too short. Got it.
A nice guy in a frustrating situation has his world suddenly turned upside-down. Through an accident of circumstance, he gets to experience much more of his beautiful assistant than he could ever have imagined. The desires and ambitions of more than one person, however, might influence his fate.
This story is absolutely amazing!! I don't tend to give out 10s, but this one totally deserves it.
Beyond hitting most of my buttons (and you did the anal really well, despite my not being into that as much), I should also compliment you on your writing style. The sentences flow well and demonstrate a good mastery of the language.
SUMMARY: Man meets woman and falls in love with her charming ability to shrink anything she wants and eat it.
Good story!
It could use a little editing for more understandable flow of events, however.
Jake, a 16 year old boy, is shrunk after testing a new drug for a local pharmacy, his mother arranges for him to be cared for in Los angeles by a young woman, so he can escape the media.
I'll disagree with Stubbornstain. I like that you got to the point. I think it would not be best if this turns into one of those long novels that never gets finished (I have one of those).
With the vore foreshadowing, I'm eagerly awaiting your next installment. :)
Author's Response:
I'm glad you noticed, i'm a huge vore fan myself, but unfortunately it may take a little while to get there :/
Your best friend's mom has a nice day planned for the two of you.
Please rate and review.
This story is ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!!
Well done.
A story about a world where giantesses are an accepted part of society. Giantesses may legally swallow people. The story follows two friends; a normal sized man and a giantess.
Good story as always, Girlfood!
Now, how about a romantic/sexual angle in the next chapter?
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review friend. I'll see what can be done about a romantic angle. Initially my plan was just to make them good friends. I appreciate the weigh in and will try to incorporate a more romantic side of things.
Amber is a witch who lives by herself in the woods. Like any good witch, she has many strange belongings, but among her many magical possesions, is a music box. The box holds a secret of its own,but it is is locked, and Amber cannot reach it's contents, at least not until a young man by the name of Jake comes along.
I like the fairytale-like yarn coupled with the historical setting. I also like how you foreshadow his appreciation for the red-headed Amber with his preference for the red-headed Katrina.
I'm very curious to see where you're going with this story. I'm a big gentle vore lover, myself.
You probably wrote this quickly, not allowing the rules of writing to mess with your flow. I do think it would benefit from being copied into a word processor to have the spell and grammar check weed out some of the problems you missed.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
A freshly out-of-school ambassador partakes on a journey to establish peaceful contact with the humans surrounding his beloved town.
Very cute little story. I am a big fan of vore.
Do you think you will be continuing with this setting?
Author's Response:
Thank you ! I'm glad you enjoyed this. As for the setting, I will eventually make a big story with good characterization and deepness revolving around this. My next project doesn't include this however. It will probably be ready during the incoming week and there will be good unaware vore inside ;)
The aspiring leader of an unknown cult is the target of some treacherous plot that changes his condition for undetermined time.
Gentle vore... I'm giddy with anticipation!
Author's Response:
I am as well :P
This story is a suggestion I got from TinyDann. Sort of like a 'humorous' storyline, the premise will be that there is a University that teaches both normal-sized people and 100 foot people. The main story will focus on how a janitor is trying to clean up the Cafeteria building while there is a hungry student outside who keeps mistaking the building for a sandwich. She will slowly eat at parts of the building, while the janitor is constantly trying to get her to stop. Although this will be vore-like, it will be gentle as well. No people shall be eaten in it's production.
It may lead to other situations, but I'm not sure how far I wish to take it...
I'm looking forward to this story! Please keep on going.
This was a great well-written story!
Given the 'vore' (and not just 'mouth play') label, I was a little disappointed that the story didn't end in her belly, but that's just me.
A beautiful lady washes ashore on an island of tiny people. Antics ensue. Can she prevent war between the peoples of the secular North and the superstitious South? And is she not the first "giant" to have walked these lands?
This is awesome! I really enjoy your use of bombast in the Piconoreans' speech and observations.
Now... if only she would swallow people intentionally... That would make my day.
Will Hansen meets an unusual young girl, and stumbles into a strange new world when he offers to house-sit for a friend.
I just read through this story. I don't usually read non-vore stories. This one was very enjoyable. Your writing is good and compelling. I enjoy the characters, especially Annie as a wonderful gentle giantess.
At the same time, something should happen. It seems to be heading somewhere, but it's not going very fast. In fact, it almost seems to be ending in an unsatisfying place. Clearly you've got something going on with feet and trust. I'd certainly like to see both of those aspects reach some sort of fruition.
Author's Response:
Thanks for reading and taking the time to write a review.
I'm sorry you feel the story went in an unsatisfying direction. I'm actually planning on wrapping it up in the next chapter. The whole time I was writing this story, I had a plot outline in mind that changed as I worked on it. There were several points during that process where the story could have gone in a drastically different direction, but didn't, due to me considering user feedback and what I felt the story demanded. Part of that would have involved more fetish content. But the story took on a life of its own, and changed into a weird work of metaphorical self-therapy about my macrophilia. I'd like to think that some of the story's apparent popularity comes from people subconsciously relating to that. Anyway, that's why the story's focus shifted more to Will and Annie's innocent relationship, which I guess is a metaphor for self-acceptance, and away from the fetish stuff (which I do enjoy). While I know the story isn't perfect, and certainly there's more I could have done with it, I think I pretty much said what I wanted to with it, and I'm pretty happy with Will's character development. Again, thanks for reading and leaving feedback. Glad you liked Annie and my writing.
Hey, this is pretty good. I'm pretty much a F/m (vore) guy, but I'll confess that this is tickling a fancy.
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Yes, this has a great start. I like your writing style and the genre.
Our relationship with the universe, as humans, is unlike anything else in the history of mankind. The universe wants so bad to be noticed, and therefore does whatever it needs to, in order to get attention, good or bad. We as humans respond either in anger or in joy. sometimes thinking the universe is smiling down on us, sometimes thinking the universe is against us. At any rate, this is our relationship with the universe. A very strange yet incredible relationship.
Unfortunately, the universe is more unfair to different people. I don't believe that the people are chosen specifically, however, they are chosen. People like Hazel and Gus are good examples of this. They're lives, opportunities, and well being was shortened or taken away from them completely. Karma is a bitch, sadly she's often times a bitch to all the wrong people. However, we as humans often times try and compensate for that the best we can. Sometimes acting harshly because we fell the other person “deserved it.”
Oh!
I enjoyed this book, as well as the movie. Your writing is also so far so good.
Your categories (Giantess, Adventure, Butt, Feet, Entrapment, Insertion, Mouth Play, Toilet, Unaware, Vore) are promising, by which I mean that many of them are what I look for in stories on this site. What I'm hoping for, however, is for there to be vore (Hazel Grace lovingly voring the kids who are doomed by their diseases), and for that not to be unaware. Obviously, you need to make this story your own, but that's what I'm looking for anyway.
The story of several young men as they are enveloped in strange events beyond their comprehension.
Wow, this is awesomely written. I'm looking forward to more.
An unwitting math teacher underestimates and eventually succumbs to one of his student's charms.
I am really looking forward to the continuation of this story. It came on my radar when you wrote Chapter 12, and was happy to see Chapter 13 not long after I read 12.
That said, I think it had a stronger beginning, and I'm not only hoping for you to keep writing, but for you to capture some of that earlier fire.
Matt has moved by himself to the city for his last year of college, looking to have some fun. After settling in to his new apartment, a new neighbor moves in next door. His new neighbor is one that will give him some of the best experiences of his lifetime.
I'm really enjoying this story. I'm also looking forward to see how you develop it further. I like how he does have resistance to her sexual aggression, and that the basketball game demonstrated that he wasn't a weak physical specimen.
I hope that you'll continue to surprise us, while still giving us what we're looking for. ;-)
An average man has a secret facet to his self-identity, a part of his life that he keeps hidden from the world and only lives out in secret. Until one day when his girlfriend gives him a mask, and both parts of himself are forced together and his secret is brought to light.
Wow, I am very much looking forward to the continuation of this story. It's amazing so far.
In terms of constructive feedback: I like it that you're descriptive, but as you already indicated in your reply to Nostory, it might be just a little on the "much" side. Dial it back just a little, and you'll be in the sweet spot, I think.
Or, just write however it makes you happy to write. That's the main objective here.
Author's Response:
Thank you for the honest feedback! I was worried my writing might have been leaning a little too heavily on the "too much" end of the spectrum, and I'm glad you were honest enough to say so! The next chapter is up now and I tried to edit with a little more of a heavy hand this time. Please let me know what I can still do to improve my own writing when you have the chance to read it.
And I am trying to write how it makes me happy, but I'm also looking to improve my own writing style and skills so I'm extremely open to constructive criticism.