Oh just saying I think the 3rd person narrator totally fist perfect for this story, dont change it Or at least for ever. I thing the all knowing one fits so much better than a I perspective for this kind of story :-) Did not see any mistakes too.

So amazingly long and so amaingly good... one of not the longest chaptest and I love it so much. The forplay was so thrilling, especially the entire idea of Ahsley manipulating someone into liking him and then... I honstly would love to see Ashely fulfill his first thoughts and turn Toby into something for the next chapters and totally betray him in the most cruel way. I would love to see Toby become some cruel stuff in relation to the football players Phil and no because of the nerd and the football players, maybe just becoming toilet paper for them to wipe their arse, or toilet, or condom for them and theit gf. Saw some little spelling mistakes here and there like his into jis or something, but nothing too bad. Incredible chapter!!

This couldnt have been any better what an incredible idea. My favorite part was the minotaur and dragon. Of course I liked it. I totally have it in front of my eyes how Ashley just put his hand on Tobys head and ... PUSH and he rams towards his monitor.

Did not see any mistakes honesstly I tried to look for them, was written perfectly. And I really enjoyed this chapter. I just have a thing for party plots. The transformation was also really great.

Did not see this coming but oh boy was it a surprise and I felt really happy about it I enjoy cruel plots and this was really unlucky for Tobey. Wonder what might happen to him still, but totally a go from me for his fate. Always enjoyed Ashelys more of a dont give a shit mentally making this story so great. Ashleys next friends haha, cant wait to see for whats happening for them.

 can't say what it is but Ashely is my favorite. Body part tf is also my favorite. The penis vagina idea was really kinky liked it a lot .

The wait was totally worth it😁maybe we can see Sauls "service" aka Ashley taking a shit here and there again that would be fun seeing how Saul would be ripped of his humanity.

but where is the scat? hope you continue

Nice story : )

New one! honestly, no matter what you write, I fall in love with it :) You have such an amazing talent with characters. I also liked it in B1G, the Ashely story, and here I am already in love with this Leon character. I had a good laugh later on after realizing his name was Hancock. Is that a play of words or just a coincidence? Because I just giggled afterward about it. That Zoe girl also seems like a cruel bitch which I enjoyed a lot.