Reviewer: Mr in A suit Signed [Report This]
Date: September 16 2021 3:06 PM Title: Chapter 3

I must thank you for not letting it overtly blunt that Sarah likes Scott from the get go. Some stories just drop a character and her first line to the shrunk guy is ‘I wat you inside me’ -_-

The way you portrayed, Sarah strucked me as a good friend to balance Tiffany’s inconsequential behavior, while being a bit clumsy and wanting to party herself. Which means, Scott is obviously more safe in her hands, but not completely out of danger.

Had you made this chapter too focussed on Sarah and Scott, it could have ruined her introduction. You were carefull to focus on Sarah while not forgetting she existis in relation to Tiffany’s role in the story, giving space for each personality to shine.

I also liked you established a time frame for the story. Tiffany has called and already schedulled Scott regrowth in one week. This makes everything more real and worthy the time, it reasures us that we will be able to see the conclusion of Scott and Tiffany adventure at some point.

Last but not least, I loved the beach scenes, all of them. They highlight a lot. First the size diferences from Scott perspective; secondly the attention the girls pay to Scott as well as how immature they really are, choosing to wear “scandalous bikinis”... to play sand castle and giant monster with Scott.

I feel you've once again built a lot of good material and I can’t wait to see how each relationship will evolve along this week the three spend together.

 

Thanks for sharing your story with us!

 

Author's Response:

Thanks for the great reviews. Comments like these keep me writing!