Each chapter is a self-contained, independent story of a son's torture at the feet (or butt!) of his mom.
Loving this. SO glad to see you writing again.
Very good. Glad to see something new from you again as your mother/son stories are the best! Given this is fantasy, still your scenes are believable and the conversation between the players is always natural and comfortable. You have a great knack for keeping things 'real' in an otherwise 'bizarre' encounter.
Hope you have more ideas for more stories, and looking forward to your next. Keep up the great work!
carnaj
Another great story Ace (or is that Jack?). You write very well, free of mispelled words and grammatical errors that so often distract from other's stories. Love the hologram idea too. Nice to see something fresh in the way of a shrinking idea. And of course your Mother/son stories are always fantastic. I think my favorite was 'Mom's the World' but you never fail to deliver. Keep up the great work!
Ace, Jack, whatever! :) I've been trying to think of something new for these types of stories, at least to keep myself interested.
A retired man becomes obsessed with the woman next door, who hasn't shown returned any feelings for him. So when love forces a drastic decision in a staged accident what could possibly go wrong?
Very good Asukafan. I've been a fan of your stories for years and a member of your Board in various identities and most of its incarnations. Great to see something from you that I have not read and must comment that your writing is vastly improved from the 'old days'. Hope to see more from you soon.
Carnaj
A young woman goes to a party with her boyfriend, only to discover that the host has a crush on him. What will happen when she tries to steal him away?
A very good start and happy yo see you are making the extra effort to make it easy to read. Paragraphs are always appreciated as opposed to HUGE blocks of text. Looking forward to some great SW action! DO continue...
This is the first story I've ever done with giant or shrunken couples, and is partially an idea a friend of mine helped me come up with. Two couples meet at a cabin for a vacation, and one of the couples mysteriously shrinks and chaos ensues.
Good for Richard, though I know it will probably not last long before Cindy takes control once again. Very nice build up to the eventual find of the tiny, shrunken couple. Looking forward for the fun to ensue!
A girl finds herself under her mother and friend's feet constantly, in a world where people wear other people in their shoes.
Please do continue. this was a great addition, getting some insight into Anna and loving her cruelty. Your writing is very good, free of errors in punctuation and grammar and you have a good grasp on how to make the characters sound real and speak like actual people. I like also that you are shifting perspective between the characters, and that helps keep the story fresh. Keep up the great work!
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed the shift to Anna's perspective in this last chapter. Anna is fun to write in first-person, but I think the real fun will be shifting back to Alisa trying to cope with giantess Anna.
A mean-spirited and emotionally abusive school teacher finds herself shrinking due to a classroom gas leak and suddenly at the mercy of her vengeful students.
[Removed]A very good start. I enjoyed the first chapter immensely, as your writing is spot on and grammatically correct with no mispellings or other distractions. The words spoken by the characters were believable and flowed nicely, as real speech should. Loving Ms. Young and looking forward to her cumuppance (?) at the hands of her students. I am envisioning one of many of Toyagub's drawings showing the teacher shrunken and at the mercy of her class. Great stuff!
5 chapters and still going strong. I am loving this one. Your writing is spot on and the dialogue is believable, both Kate and June speaking like real people and not cardboard characters, which is always a distraction in most GTS stories. I do hope that June still has some fight left in her though, as the humiliating torture is just beginning it seems. Keep up the great work!!
I'm glad you think the dialogue clicks, that's always kind of a dealbreaker for me too on certain stories. And don't worry, June's not down for the count yet ;)
Very good and nice to see a new chapter. I loved it and glad you are back. AND no worries on the Giant content. It is good to see that there are others who know that when someone shrinks there are both Giantesses as well as Giants. Keep up the gREAT work!!
thank you; i've been glad to get the positive feedback i have on this chapter in particular because of its generally lessened popularity compared to standard giantess scenes
A girl wakes up with a life-changing headache.
Like the other Reviewers I loved this story. Happy to see 'Couples' myself and some male/Giant involvement. Makes it seem more real in the interaction.
The writing was great as was the conversation. Just a couple punctuations but nothing that distracted from the tale. I thought perhaps Ben sided w/ Lucy a bit too quickly, but understand he was caught up in the heat of her sexual advances so it worked.
I am usually not a huge fan of stories that end with the death of the tiny, whether crushed, eaten, whatever. The Giants usually have so much fun torturing the Tiny, and it seems that Killing the Tiny would end that fun. But like I said, this one worked. The flow of the story was such that it seemed the logical end.
Great job and hope you will do something similar in the future. Thanks!!
Carnaj
A misbehaving teenage son once again finds himself shrunken and at the mercy of his overbearing and strict disciplinarian mother, who enlists the help of her entire women’s book club to help break her son of his bad habits.
Very good! I've always liked the Mother/son scenario in shrinking stories and yours falls right in and is done very well. On the other hand I have never really been a fan of stories that gather huge groups of women (the soccer team, the cheer-leading squad, etc.) to abuse the tiny. The Book Club however is a good touch, taking each woman in turn in each chapter. Looking forward to more and thanks for sharing.
thanks for the review. i too am not really a fan of stories that gather a group of women soley to abuse the shrunken, so i'm trying to emphasize that this is a book club that the mother is taking advantage of to punish her son as an added bonus rather than unrealistically inconveniencing a group of people just for that
A man wakes up one morning to discover he has shrunk down to a few inches tall. Her wife must go to work so she leaves him in charge of her mother. This scares him a bit.
Hoping you will continue with this story as I am liking it a lot. Always a sucker for a good 'Dominating Mother-In-Law' story.
Review-wise on the technical end; you have a few problems with Punctuation and Grammar but nothing that could not be fixed with a quick 'Read Through/Edit' before posting. The story flows well and keeps me entertained, wanting more as each chapter ends.
Nothing spectacular about Samuel; the typical shrunken victim that we all want to read about on here and other Sites. You've described him well and give him enough feeling that we care about his plight. Love Fanny though!
A truly disinterested Giantess/Goddes swept up in her Power and Authority of her little charge. I enjoy the way you have her torment her son-in-law, seemingly uncaring as to his wants, desires or feelings making her business priority and shunting him into 'Pet' status while under her care. As I have mentioned in other Reviews this is TRULY an Evil Giantess as opposed to those that torture, maim or kill in other stories. Keep the subject miserable for as long as possible and humiliate rather than injure. It's easy to 'CRUSH' the Tiny but hard to keep inflicting psychological wounds. Good job!
Hope to see another chapter soon, Santiago. Been awhile...
Thank you very much for the review!
I don´t want to make any vain promeses but i'm planning to take time to write some more the next week.
Old friends reuinite under unusual circumstances!
As always a pleasure to read one of your stories.
Your grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc. is always spot on and you seem to have a natural affinity for making the characters sound, act and seem like real people. Despite, or maybe because of the unreal the situations of course.
And you never seem to run out of fresh, new ideas. This story like your many others took some nice twists that kept me reading and wanting more, which is the highest praise any reader can offer- wanting more.
Looking forward to your next. Keep up the great work!
carnaj
Scott Stevens’ life becomes a living hell when his mother Judy gets her shrink ray license, giving her legal permission to use it on him and his siblings anytime she wants.
A prequel to the Time-out stories.
Loving this so far, a very good start.
I really enjoy your writing style, and your grammar and punctuation is near perfect, which is also a plus. Nothing more distracting in my opinion of a story that is full of errors that force you out of the reading enjoyment. Too, as I have mentioned in other reviews, I like descriptive details; what the people are wearing, setting the scene of the room and surroundings and even similes.
Finally your characters seem real to me. They speak and react like normal people despite the abnormal situation. No flowerey speeches or annoying pet names but a mother and a son who, under other conditions would seem typically normal.
Definitely looking forward to further chapters. Wondering if and how the mother might change as the situation escalates and how the brother and sister will eventually react. Keep up the great work!
carnaj
thanks, i really appreciate it. i definitely intend on tackling in this story both the mother's developing personality and the subject of scott's siblings
Very satisfying. Loving the characters and the situations. Liking very much too your short, contained stories more so than those that seem to continue. 'Mommy's Time Out' is great and I look forward to the next installment.
thanks much. it'll be back soon
Scott Stevens once again finds himself shrunken and in the hands of his sister Maggie, who brings her tiny sibling along for a week of soccer camp. When her teammates discover the miniature teen, he'll find himself in problems even deeper than giant shoes.
I'm liking it. Your writing is always great and I love the dynamics in the family: Poor abused Scott and his Mother that is obviously a bit out there, his sister now getting into the act. Your story so take it in the direction you feel the need to, but I'm enjoying immensely!
thanks for the rating/review! definitely a major factor of this one for me to was to "pass on" the mantle of darkly whacky family dynamics from mother to daughter, although certainly the mother isn't done with her fun by a long shot
Another great addition to the Mommy's Time-out series. I liked this a lot and had no problem with the ages of the characters that others seemed to have. I've read stories with far younger kids dominating their shrunken siblings.
I won't comment on your ability to write as I have done so in the past and it is always spot on. Your characters seem alive and real throughout. And the reader can generally identify with poor Scott and all the Hell he goes through in these shorts- pardon the pun. I look forward to more Maggie in future episodes, as well as Ella (?) his girlfriend, and his mother of course. I know that most here probably do not like M/m but i would like to see some time with the brother too.
Whatever you do, I'll read it.
As to your longer series, I was enjoying Toy Teacher the most and would like to see more of that, preferably w/ some more F/f interaction.
Thanks for sharing!
thank you much for your review. Ella will appear in the next episode, as will Maggie and his mother. for a while, I actually considered including his brother somehow in the story, but M/m is just not really my cup of tea, so I don't think I could do it justice. I'd be open to some M/f content however at some point if there is reader interest.
I have some tidbits already written for Toy Teacher that includes a lot of F/f interaction, so you're in luck there. thanks for reading.
An 18 year old sister finds herself shrinking and must live through the embarressing trauma of shrinking smaller then her 15 year old, 12 year old, 8 year old and finally two year old sisters. suddenly she isn't the dominate one in the house and her mother just doesn't care. Can she survive her sisters as they realize the upper hand they have?
I do like your story and am enjoying reading about Kate's continuous abuse at the hands of her sisters in their efforts to get her to shrink down to a more manageable size. You do ask for opinions and suggestions however, so...
First, you are a good writer, and getting better the more you post. I know we all, when writing, want to finish the story and get it online, but do try to take an extra moment and give your story another read through before posting. Your grammer is good but I've noted minor mistakes in spelling which detract from the reading enough to be annoying at times. Don't rely wholly on your 'spell check' as it is far from perfect. A final thorough read through will catch the little things and you will feel better about your work in the end as will the reader.
Second, DO try to double space between the paragraphs. As a reader (whose eyesight is not what it used to be), nothing turns me away more than seeing one huge block of text to read, especially in a story that I know is otherwise going to be good, like yours. Technical stuff I know, but in the end it's generally the little things that improve the quality of your writing.
As far as the story itself, I enjoyed the two chapters that developed Jessica's background and character. I think they were probably the two best chapters you've written thus far, despite there being no 'shrinking'. Jessica is probably now the most believable character of those that you have developed and I hope that she can continue to resist Stacy, Amy and whoever else when they turn their attentions on her to try to make her shrink.
You've developed Amy as a believable character as well, showing her as the little sister that really hasn't matured enough to understand that what she is doing is wrong and wanting to make her older sister, Stacy, like her and be proud of her. That's a natural stage for a little kid, to look up to and want to be like an older sibling, and with only Stacy seeming in that role it works. Hoping however that Amy will at some point feel some pity for Kate and eventually back off some. I think that will take some serious injury to Kate however, which seems on the horizon since Stacy is becoming crueler with each chapter.
Stacy as the middle sister is believable to a point. Wanting attention and going through puberty, now suddenly in a position of power over Kate who was once an authority figure to her all makes sense. She is high on the power she now has over Kate and getting revenge on her older sister for all the times she feels that Kate 'abused' or sleighted her as older siblings unthinkingly do. How extreme Stacy will go with her revenge is the question however. In the beginning if I recall correctly you painted the picture of a loving family, though perhaps not incredibly close as the mother has to work so much and relies on the older daughters to hold things together. It makes me wonder if that adds to Stacy's cruel side - the lack of the mother's involvement? Possibly, but I'm not a psychiatrist. Stacy definitely has issues though, which i hope will eventually be dealt with.
The least believable aspect of the story is the mother's apparent lack of concern over what is happening with Kate. You've made it clear that she is a busy woman, working most of the time, but she seems to have no love at all for Kate or her condition. You showed her actually totally ignoring Kate at one point - going to school scene if I recall correctly. I wonder if maybe Kate is a result of an extra-marrital affair, or even a rape, making the mother resent her or think less of her eldest daughter? Hopefully you'll shed some light on that in an upcoming chapter.
As far as Emma is concerned, i would hate to see her suddenly become an antagonist. She has so far been the one holding the family together, and while she seems oblivious as to what the other two sisters have been doing to Kate, she at least shows some concern over her older sister's plight. Having her do a sudden about face and join in on the torturing would seem to me to be out of character at this point. Plus, walking in on the scene in the bedroom with Kate naked, hurt and crying on the floor should finally throw up some red flags of warning that things have been happening behind her back. I have no doubt that Stacy will be able to lie her way out of the situation, but the seed of doubt should be planted.
I'm not saying that Emma won't or shouldn't become one of Kate's tormentors, but as she seems to be the head of the household now, her involvement should not be as extreme or direct as that of Stacy and Amy. You've written her with a sense of maturity given her new role in the family and you should stick with that I think. However there are ways that she as the 'Mother Figure' can unwittingly add to Kate's humiliation and shrinking without becoming an outright tormentor.
Not necessarily a 'better' suggestion, but a suggestion none the less: Emma steps into the bedroom and finds Kate on the floor hurt, crying, naked and shrunk to less than half the size she was since the night before. Not being stupid, Emma puts two and two together and realizes what Stacy and Amy have been doing to Kate and puts a stop to it (or so she believes). She reprimands Stacy and Amy (though not necessarily beating the shit out of them) and tries to keep Kate more under her own supervision. Running the household and taking care of the youngest sister (whose name escapes me at the moment) is a lot for her however, as she is still young herself. Now having Kate underfoot all the time simply adds to her burden and, exasperated, she takes out her frustrations on her older sister, finding fault in anything Kate does, annoyed that she has to do everything for Kate who can no longer fend for herself. Verbal abuse woulkd naturally develope followed by things like corner time, spankings, etc., all of which woulkd add to Kate's humiliation and thus continued shrinking. Stacy, being the seemingly smartest one in the family, would catch on to this and she would find ways to make Kate 'mess up' in Emma's eyes, with Amy of course following Stacy's lead.
Kate at this point should realize that she has no hope outside of Emma. Stacy's threats about her keeping quiet should no longer matter and she should realize that whether she does or doesn't say something about the abuse she is going to shrink regardless. Kate should speak up now and try to get Emma's help to at least stave off her fate a bit. If Emma believes Kate, that does not mean that Stacy and Amy will not continue to abuse her, but they just have to get more creative and sneaky when they do so. And of course the torment only becomes worse because Kate ratted them out.
Anyway, and since my review and comments have rambled on longer than your story chapter I will close by reiterating that I am truly enjoying your tale and look forward to each new installment. Any suggestions are simply that; suggestions in my opinion. In the end, though we all write hoping that others will like our work, we first write for ourselves. Always keep that in mind and be happy that you are doing a good job.
Keep up the great work and looking forward to more...
1) so better spelling? i can put a bit more effort into it. it is probably my weakest point but i am not one for rereading my own work to find mistakes but i can try from now on.
2)double space paragraphs? tbh i actually didn't think would have a problem with the spacing but if it is an issue i can totally change it. leaving a space would actually be easier because i would only have to press enter rather than enter+shift.
3)i'm glad that people enjoyed those chapters even though there was no shrinking. I thought i was kind of pushing it putting in two chapters with no shrink action so i tried to balance it by putting in a few scenes where Jessica beats the crap out of people.
4) i'm glad that you find Amy believable i wanted her to be the kind of innocent torturer. Don't worry she'll change her ways, she'll still want to keep Kate as a foot pet but she will rebel against Stacy
5) other people have commented that the mother seems out of character and i understand. from the start i said that she works too much and that is why she doesn't see the kids but this was when i was just starting out and had no idea where the story was going. the mother will be introduced soon as a full character i just need to figure out whaat she'll be like. i don't think she'll be mean but she could be stern or angry that her eldest daughter is shrinking.
6) your suggestion for emma is brillant and i will probably use it. this will allow me to keep her as a good character but also a semi torturer. thank you so much for that suggestion =) and i hope you continue to enjoy the read.
I liked it. Story-wise at least...
I will admit to not having read everything on Giantessworld - and in my defense there is a lot to read on site - but of the stories I have read, no one seems to delve into the matter of someone actually having a mental breakdown due to their shrinking. Characters in the stories do go to extremes in the situation; panic, terror, anxiety attacks, etc., but all too often the characters - shrunk/normal/giant - eventually take everything in stride, as though the situation was just a normal day with a bit of inconvenience.
Granted, everyone is different and some people are stronger-willed than others, but I would think that more characters would be overwhelmed with the shrinking to the point that they could not mentally accept the new state of reality in their world. Especially those that were instantly shrunk in a world that did not have the 'Shrinking Virus'. Not sure here who is a role-player of old, but it reminds me of the game 'Call of Cthulu', which was heavily dependent on the character's sanity throughout playing the game in that the player/character lost Sanity Points each time they were confronted with situations beyond the norm. Just seems to me that more people would not be able to accept a suddenly gigantic world where everyone seemed to want to abuse them and they would naturally withdraw into themselves if not completely break down mentally.
That said, I enjoyed this chapter for that reason. I am surprised that Kate would turn to Stacy however. I am assuming that it was like a 'Love at First Sight' kind of decision. Kate having been suddenly used and abused by Emma and her mother, Stacy was the first person she saw after her mental break down and lost and confused as she was she emotionally clutched onto the first familiar face she saw. I wonder if Kate would have had the same reaction towards Amy or even Rebecca? I was going to comment that I was surprised that it took so long for Kate to lose it considering all of the abuse she has gone through throughout the story, but on second thought I can see that losing her final anchors in Emma and Jane were the final 'straws' that broke her figurative 'camel's back'.
As to Stacy, she obviously has issues. I like the character though and am looking forward to her new levels of control over her older sister. Figuring much humiliation on the horizon, though I am hoping not to the extent that Kate dwindles down to bite-size and becomes a meal for Stacy in the final chapter. I'm not a Vore fan, but that is just me. Not a Scat fan either, but I am remembering Stacy's pledge in earlier chapters to keep her sister in her ass.
There are still chances for Kate to recover though. Jane might actually wake up at some point and become a mother again and actually worry about her daughter's eventual fate. I know not everyone was meant to be a parent, but I am wondering what happened in her past to make her so... submissive is not the right word, but maybe complacent? She seems concerned but does not step up and take control. Too, there is Kate's friend at school (whose name I forget at the moment). Wonder what she will do when next she sees Kate.
My criticizm for this chapter is that It could have used a final read through before posting. Quite a few mistakes in spelling, grammar, tense, etc. The flow of the story was such that it was not enough to distract, but the mistakes were noticible this time. I know we all write here for the fun of the gendre and not trying for perfection and we all want to get our stories up as soon as they are finished, but sometimes taking a break before posting and re-reading what we have written makes the story better in the end. I'm guilty of it too, so no worries and nothing personal. Just my opinion.
Overall I am enjoying your story very much and looking forward to the next chapter no matter which road it takes. Keep up the great work!
carnaj
Thank you for our review. To be honest I was worried I had made it a little extreme with the shwer scene. But it was necessary for what I have planned.
1- She didn't choose Stacy because she was the first person she saw but that is part of the reason. She chose Stacy because she was the first strong willed and powerful individual she saw. She needed a protector and Stacy seemed like the person who could do that. I doubt it would work with Amy or Rebecca since neither of them are seen as strong or powerful.
2- Jane does try to be a mother but I wrote her on purose to be like this. It is true that she is not as concerned as she should be. She has been away for so long working to support the family that she has lost connections with her daughters. She never developed true motherly relationships with Emma and Kate and so devoted all of her time to the oyunger girls. THat's one of the reasons why she loves Stacy so much because she makes Jane feel like a mother. However, I doubt that she will ever be able to become a full mother to Kate after her actions here. All she wanted to do was protect her daughter and in doing so forced her will uponher. By doing this she severely hurt and broke her daughters mental state. As a parent she feels that she has caused it and so will be too afraid to intervine too much in the future. She's inexpereinced and just wants a quick fix where there isn't any.
3- I like Stacy as a character but she is going to become less of a sexual figure and more of the person who makes things happen. There are some extreme things that need to happen before the story goes where I want it to go and Stacy is the only one who can do it. That's why I developed her character so.
4- Kate's friend (Jessica) will most likely freak out when seeing what has happened to Kate and lose control. In her rage she will jump on Stacy punching her obnoxious face into the ground until she is finally restrained. That isn't going to end well for her =) Jessica. as well as another shrinker, will be playing larger roles in the story. Right now where on the "stacy arc" in which she has all the power she needs but the story will be deviating away from her soon and expanding on other characters.
