Chapter Four

No man's knowledge can go beyond his experience

                                                           -John Locke

When I rejoined the realm of the living I find the shoe I had fallen into to be just as expansive looking as the car. The sound of a television was in the background as I gingerly got up. I found my legs to be rather sturdy considering that I took a fall that put humpty dumpty's to shame.

This new world looks familiar to the one I had just left. Only the grey spires have been replaced by black spires. The air has a generally musty scent to it which tickles my throat as I inhale. I can't help but feel a bit put off by the fact I'm now literally breathing the air from someone's shoe. Their sweat dried onto everything, flakes of dead skin having fallen off their foot are scattered about. Needless to say this was not as Beyonce says an upgrade.

As I gaze upwards struggling to see past the mighty black spires I can barely see the similarly covered black wall. I take a deep breath and then sigh heavily knowing my still tired and sore body was about to be forced into more physical labor as I wanted to know exactly where I stood.  Begrudgingly I grab onto the nearest black tree trunk like fiber of the insole and start to pull myself up the strand.

            The entire process is easier said than done, as I was no super athlete. I have no special abilities. I am an out of shape guy now forced into the position of having to do very physical and intensive activities. Until this entire ordeal I hadn't climbed anything since I was but a child. However, now I have climbed things that are hundreds of times my own height.

            As I make it to the top I look across a literal sea of these black strands. I look down at the ground for but a moment before moving my eyes back upwards in hopes of avoiding a panic attack from the fact that I can't even see the ground.

            The scene before me is quite amazing. Everything seems to expand out for miles in every direction. The view itself is reminiscent of looking out at a rainforest from the very top of a tree. In the far off distance I spot my greatest challenge yet, it is a literally a wall.

This wall extends up many times more then the foam sandal which I never even made it to the top off.  If this wall a natural structure placed into context it would squash Mount Everest like a bug, one part of the shoe could be raining, while another part could be sunny and eighty five.  If a person were to climb to the top the air would be so thin you could probably suffocate yourself.  Luckily for me, it wasn't an actual structure. It was just a simple shoe, however to me all of that may as well be true.

            I looked at the wall for I don't know how long, it was unimaginable. It just kept going up higher and higher. The only way to explain it would be if you think of the tallest skyscraper you can think of, and then expand the skyscraper so it encompasses you in every direction. Then try to think of finding a way over said skyscraper. When you come up with that answer, let me know.

            I don't know how long I have been walking. My feet are crying in pain, I swear my muscles are creaking in agony with every step I make. My calluses have calluses and the worse part of all, is the fact that the damn wall hasn't gotten any closer than it was at the start. It feels as if I could make the same amount of time sitting on my ass as I am walking. In the middle of forcing myself to continue on I feel the floor start to rumble.

"What the fuck now god. Was everything before this not enough? Now you need to add some spice as my walking isn't exciting enough for you? I know, let's make this like ending of Armageddon. Everything thats possible goes wrong, but if you could just do me one favor; let me be Ben Affleck instead of Bruce Willis." I frustratingly yell towards the ceiling.

 The rumbling is quite soft, at first barely even noticeable; however it's growing stronger and stronger with every passing second.  Soon I can barely stand; I widen my stance in hopes of trying to stay on my feet. However, the rumbling is getting worse and worse. I grasp onto one of the strands of the insole with the grip of a lost child finding his mother.

A loud booming reverberates what seems like all of earth. The noise doesn't seem to be coming from a specific direction it just seems as if it's everywhere. I stare upwards with a knot in my stomach, wave after wave of fear scratches and claws away at me. Tightly, so very tightly I hold onto the strand. So tight in fact I don't even notice the blood starting to bubble out on my hand where my grip broke skin from holding on so tight. My heart is literally racing; beating against my ribcage again and again.

"Please let this end, please let this end" I chant again and again as if it was some kind of new mantra. As the rumbling turns into earth shattering shaking a loud ear piercing creak so loud it manages to drown out everything else. I instinctively cover my ears letting go of the black spire.

"OH SHIT" was all I managed to get out as the shaking sends me flying backwards through the air until my back crashes into another strand from the insole and I slink down to the ground gasping for air.

As my body fights a new battle for air I still muster the presence of mind to grasp onto this new strand as I shut my eyes tightly hoping this all ends. The constant shaking is greeted with two very close thundering booms. A loud slam is followed by the entire world falling amongst itself. The floor starts to rise up at slant. It happens so fast that my mind can't even keep up with the actions. As I start tumbling through the air falling for a horrifying three seconds before I roughly land on something.

I force myself to open my eyes and see myself lying on the wall, or what was the mighty wall. I look forward at two sets of feet, one bare and the other with socks on. My mind struggles to put the pieces together as it races at more miles a minute then I care to know.

Okay, so the bare feet, must be Brooke. As she was wearing sandals which sent me into here when I fell off; so she must have went somewhere else in the house and is now returning. That had to be initial earthquake, she was walking towards me, or at the very least my vicinity. Then these other feet, well person returned home, the ear piercing creak is there door. She must have kicked off her shoes, and one or both of the shoes hit the shoe I was trapped in sending it on its side.

That all makes sense, I thought to myself as both sets of feet disappeared into the distance; however the voices of the two giantesses seemed more near then I cared for. I knew what I had to do. I just had to pick myself up and get out of here like the hero in a story would. This could be my best chance.

So I tried to move, but my body wouldn't cooperate. I just limply lay on the ground. I start to panic and talk to myself again as I fight with my arms and legs to do what I say. Which is getting the hell out of here.

"Oh god, no, no get up. Please get up, you can do this arms and legs. We have been through so much. Remember high school arms? That time we found our self slipping down Sarah Connors shirt in history class, or the time when we were much younger and we discovered dad's collection of Marilyn Monroe magazines. That was a good night wasn't? We also discovered our fifth limb that night.  Legs, legs we have had good times too, we had...no that was arms too. Well, needless to say we had good times guys. I just need you to move me these last, last what 2 or 3 miles." I pleaded, however there was no response though. My body motionlessly lay on the ground.

The shaking returned as the socking clad pair of feet seemed to be coming almost right towards me. This time I had no action I could take. My body flopped a bit like a fish out of water as I struggled to move my arms and legs into some kind of defensive position. I just didn't have the strength to do anything.

The stocking clad feet stopped a good distance in front of me. The shadow they casted blocked out much of the light. The most startling things happened, a knee the size of a planet lowered semi towards me. I could hear her gathering her things, or tidying up. God I hope not tidying up. If she straightens these shoes I'm done for.

"Please god, just make her go away, let her leave this shoe be." I mutter repeatedly and surprisingly a few horror filled minutes later she leaves carrying her things which doesn't include the shoe I'm in.

It was well into the night before I found myself strong enough to continue on. My muscles were still hurting somewhat, but nothing short of sleeping for a few days was going to solve that. I had regained motion and rested enough to where I could walk. The girls were present, but it seemed as if they had retreated to their bedrooms. I took advantage of this moment to in the infamous words of snagglepuss exit stage left.