“This is amazing!” Sally shouted to her friend Maya over the din of the music.

The beats shook the entire massive space they were partying in. In a way it felt like partying in an open field; there were technically walls around them but they seemed miles apart.

“I know right!” Maya yelled back as she twirled.

The pair were at perhaps the most unique party they’d ever heard of.

A post on social media, a private group, had led them both to a new development area of town where the houses were still mostly empty. They’d been greeted by a nice mid-height woman and a party already in full swing. Since it was obviously safe, over a hundred partiers were already busy, they had no issues accepted the group Tiny Tinder request and shrinking down to two inches tall. The woman had carefully deposited them onto the kitchen island where the party was taken place, carefully put their phones in a cabinet out of sight in the hallway, and it had been non-stop fun ever since.

There was a regular sized household speaker that gave the party more than enough sound to essentially be a concert. The ‘ground’ beneath their feet even shook slightly while they danced. Up close the faux-granite countertop looked even cooler.

“How do you think they did the booze part?” Maya asked as they left the dance floor area and walked to what was half designated as a bar.

“No idea!” Sally yelled back, not wanting to explain that she recognized some of the drink dispenser machines from childhood toys. Nor that somehow most alcohol tasted much better as a person shrank.

“Let’s get wasted!” they yelled in unison as their host activated an overhead LED light that worked far better than a disco ball at highlighting the party.

***

Helena dropped off the last group of partiers with a smile, double checked that her hired bartenders were fully stocked, then stepped out of the kitchen. She had to be sure to hold that smile until she was out of sight, and to keep the crowd busy she activated a small LED bulb that cycled through colors rapidly as it hung from the ceiling.

The ‘locked and safe’ cabinet she had been putting her partiers’ phones in was actually unlocked and currently only held twelve phones. Zero by the time she unloaded it into her purse.

“How’s it going?” she called ahead of herself as she moved down the hall. There was no worries that a tiny partier would hear her voice; her twenty dollar speaker more than drowned out any noise she could make.

She nudged the door to the backroom open and sat her purse on the collapsible table her partner was working at.

Devan looked up at her as he plugged multiple phones into cables and tapped on his laptop.

“Pretty awesome, actually,” he said as he slid two phones into a large trash can.

Helena dumped out the last of the phones and slid them into his ‘IN’ pile.

“Everyone’s security sucks,” Devan said, “There hasn’t been any issue syncing up and taking over, and I think these remotes are gonna work great.”

He indicated a small box that Helena knew was full of simple remotes that she had 3D printed herself, with some aid from Devan for the electronics portion.

“Those were a really good idea,” she told Devan, “It opened up a whole new realm for us. What with you hijacking the signal and-”

“Thanks but not right now,” he interrupted gently as he tossed one phone to the side and plugged a new one into his laptop, “I want to get this wrapped up before I do so many I screw something up. This is it, right?”

“Yeah, that’s the last of them,” Helena said, “How long til I can wrap things up out there?”

Truth be told it really did look like a fun time that she was hosting. Ignorance was bliss.

“Five minutes? I’ll let you know,” he told her.

***

Eva carefully closed the tap and handed her patron a tiny beer. Tiny was a relative term, at their current size it was pretty big. That didn’t stop the taps from leaking a little; they were repurposed from toys and repainted. Which didn’t always mean watertight.

“More cleanup over here?” the other bartender, Alli, asked her over the music.

They’d never worked together before but found themselves moving like a well-oiled machine. Both were bartenders at full-size too, but neither could turn down the money that they’d been offered for this incredibly cool Tiny party.

“No, this tap shuts pretty good,” Eva replied, giving it a nervous look.

For once there wasn’t anybody at their makeshift bar. It had been a very busy night. But when she thought of the cash she’d already been paid, it had been worth it. The general idea made her nervous but no one paid cash up front to do something shady.

“Good maybe we-”

The music paused. There was a groan of disappointment followed briefly by a cheer.

“Oh, Kelly must have an announcement!” Eva said, looking upward at her boss for the evening.

The woman was looking down at the crowd with a smile.

“Uh, you mean Terra?” Alli replied, wondering why Eva called her boss a different name.

A terrifying thought flashed through her mind just as the giant woman spoke.

“I want to thank you all for coming out tonight!” Helena said excitedly, and the crowd cheered again. “This has been a huge success and I’m really, really thankful so many people came out.”

Alli breathed a sigh of relief. She’d been sure something horrible was about to happen.

“Now, let’s really celebrate!” the giant woman said, holding up a large bottle of champagne, “Get over here everyone! Bartenders, you too!”

Eva laughed and happily hopped the bar along with the other three bartenders. Alli held back; she didn’t like champagne. The crowd of partiergoers moved closed to Helena who was starting to shake the bottle.

Helena shook the fake bottle for another few seconds, just long enough to get all the tinies closer to the edge of the kitchen island.

Then she dropped her fake smile with relief, and sat the bottle on the ground. The crowd seemed to catch her change in energy but everyone was drunk enough to only react with confusion rather than running away.

Third time’s the charm, she thought as she traded the fake bottle for a large metal popcorn bowl.

“Alright, everyone just stand still,” she said as she held the bowl just below the height of the island, “If you all run this is gonna get annoying.”

Alli clapped her hands over her mouth to keep from screaming. The regular sized woman, who had apparently lied about her name and clearly everything else, leaned over the crowd. A few less-drunk people attempted to run but the woman just used her forearm to sweep them back.

“Hop in and save me the trouble? No?”

There was a massive sigh of annoyance and Alli watched in terror as the woman used her forearm to sweep the crowd toward her.

“Next time I’m bringing a brush,” she said, irritated, as she smashed people together.

Alli could hear faint screaming as almost two hundred people were shoved off the side of the island. She couldn’t see what they were landing in but knew there was no way it was just a fall to their deaths. When things happened to shrunken people it was never that simple.

Before she could even think about what to do next, she was alone, hiding behind the miniature bar and hoping that the giant woman didn’t notice her. The massive metal bowl that was now a prison was set carefully onto the kitchen island.

“Don’t bother,” Helena said to someone in the bowl, “I greased the sides.”

Alli could only hope that meant someone was trying to climb.

“Hey D!” Helena called out to someone unseen, “Let’s wrap this up, I don’t want to pack everything myself this time!”

A distant male voice called back: “I’m packing up the computers! Gimme a break! Test the remote real quick!”

“Fine, fine,” Helena mumbled as she pulled a small remote out of her pocket.

Movement caught her eye.

“Hey! A bartender!”

Alli screamed as massive fingers wrapped around her body and dropped her casually onto the middle of the kitchen island. She had a momentary view of the mass of people cluttered together in the bowl before falling with a scream. The fall surprised her, but being super-tough it didn’t actually hurt.

“Thanks for volunteering, it’s tough to get people to work at these things,” Helena said idly as she looked at the small remote in her hand.

“Let me go!” Alli screamed upward, “I won’t tell anyone and-”

“Hold still, I’m new to this,” the bigger woman said.

She fiddled with the remote and Alli’s stomach lurched as she grew four inches taller.

“You paid me and everythi-”

“Chump change,” Helena interrupted, only glancing briefly at Alli. “Pinch yourself?”

“Wha-”

Alli screamed when Helena reached toward her again. She tried to dodge out of the way but it didn’t matter. Two fingers encircled her leg and she fell. The fingers squeezed and pain shot through her entire body. When the fingers left she looked down and saw that her leg was twisted in the wrong direction.

Broken.

She was supposed to be super-tough.

“Oh fuck.”

“So that one works,” Helena said as she looked at her results with a smile. She waved the remote at Alli. “Control over the common TT settings. For all of you.”

Alli drew breath to scream but instead her stomach lurched again as she shrank down, then briefly back upward.

“Two inches, that’ll do,” the woman said.

“Is it working?” a man’s voice said, and Alli began screaming when she saw the giant man holding a trash bag that was obviously full of phones.

Through her pain and terror she realized what was actually happening.

“Just one more setting to try,” Helena said as she nudged a button on the remote.

Alli winced, sure it was about to get worse. Her leg had actually stopped hurting and she realized adrenaline had numbed it for her. For the moment.

“Wanna do the honors?” she asked Devan, her partner-in-crime.

“Nah, I wanna get these soaking in that big-ass cooler in the trunk before anything dumb happens,” he replied. The man’s massive eyes spared Alli a glance, then he smirked at her before walking out the front door.

Alli looked back at Helena in time to scream as her massive hand wrapped around her. The giant woman held the tiny wounded bartender in front of her face and gave her a terrifyingly relaxed smile.

“We’re kinda testing a thing,” Helena explained as she shifted Alli around to a better position.

The small woman tried not to scream again as she saw the remote. On one side was a slider for size, on the other a dial with several toughness settings. Of the actual buttons, one labeled 'digestable' was lit up. As well as the toughness being halfway between 'indestructible' and 'wimpy.'

“So struggle as much as you can, okay? If it doesn’t work then we need to know.”

Alli lost her self control as she was lifted above Helena’s head.

“Perfect! Just like that!”

And Helena lowered the little bartender into her mouth. She fought for all she was worth but it just made her a more interesting morsel for Helena. The struggling couldn’t come close to overpowering her tongue and Alli was swallowed in a disturbingly business-like fashion.

Helena didn’t have time to enjoy a treat; Devan was right. The longer it took to pack up and vanish the more likely their situation would be become complicated. They had technically broken into the unoccupied house to host the party.

After an extra large gulp to get the squirmer down, Helena shrugged and picked up her bowl of product. There was much screaming and noise-making, but it was easy to ignore. Especially once she covered the top with plastic cling wrap.

“Can’t have anyone falling out, right?” she said as she looked down at the tumbling crowd. Laughing, she carried tonight’s haul out to the car just as Devan walked back in to grab his computer equipment.

***

The following morning Helena slept in. She was greeted by a bright sunny day and coffee brewed on a timer an hour earlier. Her midnight snack was still twitching somewhere in her small intestine and she idly texted Devan to let him know the setting had worked just fine but in the future they should pair it with a timer of some sort. She loved the thought of the bartender still twitching, and knew she was completely aware of every excruciating moment in her guts up until she was well and truly digested. It was how a tiny snack should be, in her opinion.

But some people preferred their treats capable of multiple rounds. And some didn’t want to be kept up half the night by the bouncing tummies. As a smart businesswoman she wanted her customers to have options.

After a cup of coffee and a banana (she was always health conscious), her stomach finally finished its earlier meal and the twitching stopped.

With a smile she sat down to begin sorting last night’s haul. Two taps on her phone opened her music app and she started her day with Mozart.

A printed out list awaited her with numbers and destinations.

“Three for Michigan? Lame,” she said aloud as she pulled out a small ziplock baggie.

Barely looking at what she was doing, Helena lifted the plastic wrap on the bowl and snagged three tinies. They screamed and shouted but she wasn’t paying attention. Almost bored, she dropped the three into the baggie. Next came three small remotes identical to the one she had tested the night before. With a printout of how to sync and use the remotes, Helena added everything to a box, added a pre-printed label, then set the box to the side. Ready to ship.

“Four for Tijuana?” Helena giggled, “They must have something fun planned, TT is legal down there. Must want some gringos in particular.”

This time she did pay more attention, making sure she got the whitest looking tinies that she’d procured last night. These went into a their own baggie, and the scenario repeated.

“Maybe a donkey show?” she wondered aloud before moving onto the rest of her orders.

Eight went to Thailand, where Helena never knew that ladyboys used them as prostate massagers for years until they would inevitably be lost in the sewage system.

Another four went to Canada where a poutine obsessed chef realized that tinies just weren’t the ingredient he was looking for. This was, of course, after they had been devoured.

A dozen to Chile, six to New Zealand, three sent to England. Helena went through the routine, sometimes vacuum sealing the bags to make sure customs wouldn’t catch on in certain countries. Everyone wanted tinies, but not everywhere allowed the world’s most popular app.

Finally, Helena filled her last order and looked at the pile of boxes she’d prepared.

“Damn that’s a lot of money,” she said aloud.

“And just enough parties too,” she announced as she looked into the bowl. She’d set a rough goal for how many people to bring in, and there was just one left from last night.

The lone tiny cowered under Helena’s hand as she reached into the bowl.

“What to do with you, I wonder?”

Idly she used her last remote and synced it to the tiny. She curled her hand around the little blonde and made sure she was on three-quarters-toughened. Her thumb slid the slider up and she felt the tiny grow to five inches in her palm. Big enough that she could be heard yelling in terror.

“Quiet you,” Helena told her before standing and walking into her backyard.

It was a beautiful morning. The birds were chirping, the sun was shining.

The neighbor’s dog was in their backyard.

“Hiya Pluto!” she said happily to the great dane, who bounded up on the chain link fence and stood on his hind legs almost as tall as she was.

Helena gave him dutiful scratches behind the ears, then offered him a toy.

“You want it boy? You want it?”

She wiggled the tiny screaming woman just in front of the dogs nose, and he dropped down from the fence and spun in circles in excitement.

“Go get it!” Helena said with a laugh as she tossed the tiny halfway across her neighbor’s backyard.

The dog took off like a shot and just as the tiny bounced, Pluto snapped her up with his jaws.

“Have fun!” she called out to her neighbor’s dog as he started gnawing.

That oughta give him a couple hours’ fun, she thought as she thought of her trip to the post office.

***

For the curious: Those sent to Mexico were, indeed, used as part of a donkey show. One recently-poorly performing donkey found its appendage revitalized by cock vore. The tinies, of course, were recovered after the show and reused for years.