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Reviewer: Footsteps Signed [Report This]
Date: October 20 2021 6:17 AM Title: The S Virus

There are some distracting pronoun errors, like calling him Adam and then saying "I". Also there are times where you say him instead of her when talking about things like ccleavage. 

 

That being said, I think it's off to a great start. If he were to end up around doll sized, it'd be very humiliating if tarah decides to pretend practice breastfeeding him, maybe for a home-Economics or health class, or maybe just for fun to show her sisters how important boobs are. If he gets really small maybe he could end up trapped in her big ass as punishment for talking back. 



Author's Response:

Yo are totally right .. I speak Spanish so usually I write the story in that lenguaje and then translate it with some translator... so some mistakes could happen, I will revise the story completely to avoid them ... thank you 

Reviewer: thopk38 Signed [Report This]
Date: December 03 2020 8:22 AM Title: begginig of problems

Nice beginning.... I Hope you keep going

Reviewer: bigfly20 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: November 03 2020 2:17 AM Title: begginig of problems

Good story. I hope you keep it up

Reviewer: Matanzamir2 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 30 2020 8:47 PM Title: begginig of problems

Great start. I'm looking forward to see more!

Reviewer: thegreatrizzo Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: October 30 2020 4:14 PM Title: begginig of problems

Great beginning of a story. Does he natrually lose height because of the fog or does physical touch transfer size? it will be cool for him to trapped in Tara's breasts



Author's Response:

Yo había decidido continue with the story. I hope you like it

Reviewer: facortes12 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 28 2020 1:52 PM Title: begginig of problems

Thanks you very much! I will check all your suggestion! I will improve the grammar.

keep looking, it will get better!

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