Date: March 04 2019 3:59 PM Title: Chapter 20 - Ring
Just incredible, can't wait for the next chapter!
[Report This]Date: March 04 2019 11:44 AM Title: Chapter 20 - Ring
(LMAO At that caption at the end)
But what a mind blowing chapter! Now I don’t even know how I feel about Heather anymore. I almost kind of feel bad for her… Since she was grown in a lab, with no real parents, I feel like this has caused a severe disconnection to her humanity. She sometimes lacks the basic compassion and understanding for other humans, although she miraculously loves Ben. She craves Ben’s love in return, so maybe Ben is using this to his advantage? I’m not sure yet. (Btw, so when she threatened to squash him with a hammer if he didn’t drink the “permanent” shrinking supplement, she was just trying to stop him from shrinking any further, since it's technically not really “permanent” because there’s still an antidote, right?) I just feel bad for Heather because she truthfully believes she’s a good person and she’s doing the right thing, but at the same time, she’s still dangerous. I wonder what’s really going through Ben’s mind right now though, because something tells me he has a trick up his sleeve. Also I wonder what she did with Jason?
Again, great chapter! You’ve literally got me hanging on the edge of my seat now! I’m low-key sad that you say it’s coming to an end soon because it’s just so freakin good! D:
Author's Response:
Your comment really nails all the various points about her character. I'm working on five alternate endings right now that push each character slightly in one direction to see what end result it produces.
Heather isn't Carter's biological daughter, but she wasn't necessarily lab grown. She could have been an implanted embryo carried by a surrogate. I have a bit more of her backstory and Carter's in my mind, but I'm not too sure it's actually worth spelling out every last point.
Heather threatened him because she desperately wants him to submit to her authority, and conventional methods just weren't working. Like Jason, she actually does want Ben to freely choose to submit to her. He just wasn't choosing what she wanted. So she fucking flipped out.
[Report This]Date: March 02 2019 3:16 PM Title: Chapter 20 - Ring
Let me first apologise for leaving a review only after 20 chapters have already been published. I have been following your story since its beginning and was increasingly impressed by its quality. Although most chapters are shorter than I usually prefer, you skillfully balanced plot, character development and kinky stuff, so denser division presented no pacing issues. Your writing style combined with gripping storyline resulted in an engaging story, updates of which I anxiously await not only for its size-related content, but out of sheer curiosity how your protagonists' fate will unfold.
What is worth mentioning, your story is quite bold and on the kinkier side of things (even considering the website you are posting it on) and delves into some underexplored areas. As original concepts and unorthodox thinking should be rewarded, a deserving 10,5/10
Author's Response:
Thank you, that really means a lot. I expect to have the story fully wrapped up by the end of this week. Hope you enjoy.