Date: September 28 2016 7:03 AM Title: Chapter 1
As of now, I like where the story is going. I really love how the girls are twisted in their own ways. Not to mention the way fear is depicted thoughout the chapters really add to the story.
Author's Response: I've always felt like depicting emotion is by far my strongest suit as a writer, so that's usually what I stick to. Thanks for the review!
Date: May 29 2016 1:44 PM Title: Chapter 4
I hope Johhny survives not a big fan of violent feminists winning.
Author's Response: Well, I'm not much of a "happy endings" guy, but we'll see :) I should point out that they're not feminists per se, they're just a bunch of girls who were brainwashed into being sadistic psychos.
Date: February 24 2016 4:22 PM Title: Chapter 1
I am sure I will consider reading any number of your other stories. Right, now I need to focus on completing my own. It's jsut been updated, but I want to make sure I'm more timely with the next chapter so I'm restricted in how much reading I can really do.
Author's Response: Understood. I do hope you get around to it.
Date: February 24 2016 1:09 AM Title: Chapter 2
In this chapter it really seems like the main character is speaking to reader. I do like that. I'm not sure that it would work in the 'long run', as they say, but it's a nice idea. I think you could have a decent story here, but the execute it a little off in places. I will be interested to see where you take this story though.
Author's Response: That was actually the point of both chapters: the main character is leaving behind a log of the events leading up to and during his escape attempt. I'm not sure how long that style will last, but I am aware that it can't go on forever. Once again, thanks for the review. Also, you should really check out my other two stories (if you're into the REALLY dark stuff, that is)
Date: February 24 2016 1:05 AM Title: Chapter 1
The first paragraph is kind of eh...cramming all that into a disjointed segment. It could have been put for eloquently, Maybe have a prologue to set the scene?
And then "Fast-forward 65 years".
Does this mean the main character is really old? Or am I missing something. I want to like this story - it's an interesting idea -but it's a bit confusing. I do appreciate the first person though.
Author's Response: The main character hasn't been around for the events he described; they were told to him, and he's just relaying the information. As for the first paragraph, that's something I'll keep in mind- not sure I'll change it at this stage, but it's good information for the future. Thanks for the feedback!
Date: February 22 2016 4:48 PM Title: Chapter 1
Just wanted to say I'll probably leave an extented review in the morning. I quickly skimmed though chapters one and two and I do like the story so far. However there some details I wanted to comment on.
Author's Response: Alright, good deal. I eagerly await your review- I was beginning to worry that the new chapter wouldn't get one