[Report This]Date: August 07 2014 7:37 AM Title: Chapter 13: The Meeting
I think the reaction I would have to Carly's little story would more be disgust than bewilderment. Also, I think it's time for Tris to suck it up and let Christy in on her predicament. She might be amused by it, but she's not going to be all judgmental.
Author's Response: Yes I think Christy would leap at the opportunity to help if Tris told her about it :P
[Report This]Date: August 07 2014 4:32 AM Title: Chapter 13: The Meeting
I'd like to see a short side-story about Carly and her brother. Maybe, something a little different... She could bring her brother to work with her, and sometime during the day he would come up missing?
Everyone searches for him and they can't find him anywhere...
Some artical of his clothing is found next to the trash compactor (or something like that) and everyone thinks that he's been killed, but then...
Christy finds him and decides to take him back to his sister, but he begs her to keep him away from her because she treats him like a pet...
Christy re-conciders, and decides to keep him...
---or something along those lines, would allow you to split the story and get another plot line going.
Just a suggestion... ;`)
Author's Response: That is some suggestion :D I've been trying to think of a way to split the story for a while and I think I have a good idea, but these suggestions you give me are definitely helping with some parts of the story :)