Date: June 07 2014 12:45 PM Title: Bios Page
That chapter was amazing! I still don't know what all this time stuff is supposed to change if both Tucker and Jessica get their memories wiped at the end of it; wouldn't both of them just repeat everthing exactly the same way? But I guess that's a question of The Doctor.
Either way, having Jess see all these things and get her reactions is awesome, I'm really glad for this side-story now!
Ah, that is certainly up to The Doctor and I am not at liberty to say what he has planned.
Good to see that you're enjoying it, it was a slow start but glad to see that things are getting more interesting for you.
Date: June 02 2014 6:20 PM Title: Bios Page
First I must say that I have never read any of your stories. I enjoyed the bios getting a visual representation of the characters is always great something I think should be included in every story. From what I read you have an interesting plot line in mind so I am looking forward to seeing more chapters (:
I will admit I do have a preference to violent giantess content but I am certainly going to give this story a read each time you update.
Also it may take me a while but I intend to read your other stories so expect reviews on them by sometime over the next few days.
Thank you for reading and reviewing, I hope to read more from you!
Date: May 30 2014 4:18 PM Title: Bios Page
Im liking this so far, I'm looking forward to more Gabriel, he seems like an interesting character (although he's kinda a white knight).
Thank you, it was a difficult chapter to write but I think I got it. There's more to him than you think.
Date: May 29 2014 9:30 PM Title: Bios Page
Okay, I read through some of your other work, I think I may have a solution to the dialogue. One, more adjectives before and after the quotations.
But what could help is putting yourself in your characters shoes. Imagine what you would say if YOU were Snape, would you say only the bare minimum of what is neeeded to get your point across? Try imagining your story as a movie, and imagine how fluent it is when you read it over, how natural it is. And by imagining it as a movie, do not try and jot down movie cliches as words like in certain parts of The Escape. Every word must be on a perfect sync and harmony with the next.
Write as you think, imagine the conversation happening, and write it down without stopping. Just a little advice.
P.S Email me your idea whenever you feel like it. Preferably before next Tuesday though, cuz i have stuff planned, but no rush. Also, I will send you a bios or a first chapter of... the story plotline i sent you which nobody can know about.
Ah I see, I shall try to work all of this into the next chapter, be it Aftermath or BFG. Also, sure, send over your bios page of the super secret story. I can be more descriptive but this is how I naturally write so I will see how it fits into my style.
Date: May 29 2014 1:13 PM Title: Bios Page
From what I've read so far I can tell this is gonna be a cool story. The dead people from different eras was a sweet idea, not one I've seen used on this site before.
But, from what I hear, this is part of a series so I'm going to have to take some time and read the other stories that came before. That may take awhile.
Thanks for reviewing, also I must say that there is only one other story in the series so it shouldn't take too long.
Date: May 29 2014 12:37 PM Title: Bios Page
While I was interested, the dialogue could use a lot of work. Still has that... sort of generic, emotionless and wooden feel to it, which The Escape suffered from early on, and the confrontations with Jessica and Zoltan in The Aftermath. The time period was also confusing, so was where they were... I probably need background information.
Not going to lie and say it is five star, but not going to lie and say it is a low three...
I am not really a fan of the BFG, series, I found it juvenile and boring often, but I admit it was well written. I am VERY interested in how you change it though.
Hmm wooden? Maybe I could use more adjectives? Do tell me how I can change it since I do want to improve. As for where and when she is, it will be explained.