Date: May 21 2014 11:29 AM Title: Imprisonment
Eh, I almost didn't include that last comment on Jenna. As much as she wants to see Naomi suffer, it would be out of character for her to frightened small children just to spite her. I hope it goes well for Naomi.
And what, what got passed around? Is it possible to detective the answer out of the story so far?
Author's Response:
It is, yes.
Date: May 21 2014 7:59 AM Title: Imprisonment
@xkcd
About naomi and beta children you gotta remember that Kayla was part of her evaluation meaning theres no doubt she is reformed since Kayla can read minds.
Date: May 21 2014 7:57 AM Title: Imprisonment
@xkcd
Also, although im iffy with Jennas character, she was more than reasonable in this chapter. I cant deny that since she gets people that for the most part are deemed unworthy from the start, shes basically an executioner but shes not all bad and certainly has her shining moments.
You gotta remember that things in this universe dont work the same as ours and for good reason...We got micro people, giant people, shrinking powers, mind reading, and more! The omega universe simply cant function the same as ours but id say things would prolly be worse in real life.
I doubt that a noble person like Kayla with those powers would exist to keep betas safe. Id say if this were real life betas would be extinct already.
You sound mad dude, maybe this story isnt for you.
Date: May 21 2014 7:43 AM Title: Imprisonment
@xkcd
About naomi and beta children you gotta remember that Kayla was part of her evaluation meaning theres no doubt she is reformed since Kayla can read minds.
Date: May 21 2014 7:20 AM Title: Imprisonment
They're putting the confessed violent criminals into contact with vulnerable children? After being tortured and browbeaten for days/weeks? This sort of treatment of criminals could only directly lead to more deaths in the short run. Imagine if Naomi was an actual criminal: someone capable, intelligent (insofar as a violent criminal can be...), and without morals - she could have easily given the same responses/reactions to her jailers (i.e. overblown contrition) and gotten to this same point. They're basically treating any true psychopath who's high-functioning enough to tell them what they want to hear to a buffet. I know there might be some rehabilitative aspects to this exercise but that's really no excuse to put more innocents in the line of fire. This system is backwards! But that's what comes of a dictatorship I guess!
And whats with Jenna raging her balls off all the time? She really needs to take some anger-management classes or something because getting "angry at meaninglessness" (or whatever) is indicative of underlying emotional issues. Ideally, someone in such a position of power would be in pretty much complete control of their negative emotions, otherwise they'd - I don't know - interfere with them carrying out their responsibilities? On the other hand, she seems to be responsible for torturing people to death in fits of sociopathic rage, so I guess she's over qualified for her job.
I cannot say enough how much I despise Jenna. She's the most egocentric, unempathetic, spoiled brat I've read about for at least the last couple days. She pulls her "grrrr righteous anger sword of truth!" routine over people murdering other people, and then goes on to regularly harass and abuse her fellow humans - sometimes in the same breath! Her entire role in life is to pretty much be to Omegas' pet Rancor....If someone is deemed "unworthy of living" (or whatever the hell these clowns use to justify protracted torture followed by painful death) they get thrown to this mental midget so they can be torn apart for entertainment value.
On the other hand these people are super duper bad and unforgivable because they killed ppl so we should kill them too hur hur hur....afterwards we can lynch up some coloreds for being bad ppl (because they are colored do you see?), and then we can go pray to the rain gods so our crops can grow super big!
Cro-magnon, childish nonsense I swear to god. Sometimes it almost seems as if people want to go back to the dark ages, for no other reason than it'd be simpler to know who to mistreat (read: people that annoy you).
[Report This]Date: May 18 2014 10:00 PM Title: Imprisonment
I am really enjoying this, despite my normally nonviolent nature. Your character development is deep enough to take me past that; I like hearing about these people. I had been wondering whether Corey's birth mother might be reintroduced to the milieu. I want her to be impressed, and sad at what she has missed. She lost big time! Whadda maroon...
Date: May 18 2014 6:52 PM Title: Imprisonment
@Mr.Sirk
Thanks :D, I've always had people get pissed at me for how long and awkward the name is, but I'm glad someone else likes it!
Date: May 18 2014 1:58 PM Title: Imprisonment
@MrSirk
But I guess if you could get away with killing humans and not going to jail why wouldn't you?
Whaat? So many reasons as to why that's so wrong.
As for the Alpha's lack of empathy...
For some sick reason there are Alphas that see Betas as nothing more than rodents. So yes, there are some sick kids out there that kill small animals for their own amusement. It's disgusting and wrong, but either they weren't raised properly, or they were born...broken.
Just felt the need to throw in my two cents. Hopefully I didn't offend anyone.
Date: May 18 2014 1:35 PM Title: Imprisonment
@gadgetmewombo
First of all awesome name man. I've been meaning to say thar for a while it's really fun to say out loud.
Second I'm not saying it's unrealistc I've read the story and know beta's have no rights but I feel it's still pretty harsh and very hard to read. It seems some alphas just lack empathy for lesser creatures and I have to wonder why? But I guess if you could get away with killing humans and not going to jail why wouldn't you?
Author's Response:
Basically pre-Omega society should be considered completely dystopic in nature when it comes to Betas. There's still some dystopia elements in "current" times of course, but in the past Betas were basically considered subhuman and society at large didn't give a shit about them. Sophie even gives a bit of insight on how Betas at large were viewed (and this is a view that was passed down): Their existence, to Alphas, was to provide them with just about any form of release imaginable, regardless of the damage it did to the Betas.
It was Fucked Up.
Date: May 18 2014 11:41 AM Title: Imprisonment
@Mr.Sirk
There are plenty of boys that enjoy killing or torturing small animals, I don't think it's unrealistic at all.
Date: May 18 2014 7:45 AM Title: Imprisonment
Great chapter! And im glad you back on this! If that wasn't deserving of the rating I dont know what is, gruesome stuff.
[Report This]Date: May 10 2014 6:43 PM Title: Imprisonment
All caught up on this! Now all that's left is Tough Love, which it appears I've already seen a small glimpse of what will happen to Ashley through this story.
This is a very interesting concept. One all powerful goddess who imparts her gifts to others in order to protect Betas. We've seen a small amount of Kayla's past so far, and I'm interested to see what caused her to become who she is now.
I'm in agreement with Claire. If she's allowed one 'accident' with her initial charges, then there'd be no better use for it. It could be possible to rehabilitate Marion, but is she really worth the effort? I don't think so. She's a serial killer who shows no remorse over what she's done. Perhaps Kayla has plans for her that we've yet to discover. In any case...she shouldn't be released back into the world. Not in a year. Not ever.
I hope that Melody will get some alone time with the three girls. Now that Corey has given her some of the specifics of his injuries, I'm wondering how calm and restrained she'd be around them. If one good thing came of his tragic assault, it's that Melody was able to confess her feelings for him.
Whelps...I'm very interested in this story and I'm eager to see more.
[Report This]Date: March 23 2014 6:51 PM Title: Imprisonment
If anyone takes a look at this story and says "Meh, I don't need to read this" then you're in some serious denial. Go see a counselor, and get yo sh** together people cause we got an excellent story on our hands.
PS- To gadgetmawombo: For a lot of fighting games, Kayla would be a starter character. Not much OP at all.
But in this story she goes as follows: Much OP, such broken
Date: March 17 2014 10:28 PM Title: Imprisonment
Every Omega in this story, save Melody, seems to be a complete and utter sociopath - their ability to empathize with others is entirely conditional and often flawed. What happens when they run out of strawman evil Alphas to fuck with?
Date: March 11 2014 7:12 PM Title: Imprisonment
*Reads pkgong's review and your response*
Asshole Betas? Now that seems interesting! I wonder how much of an asshole a Beta can be when everyone is so much bigger...I suppose they could be assholes to eachother; that would work.
Oh BTW, great chapter. Kayla seems like more and more of a god with each chapter that goes by. She TOO OP, if this were a fighting game she'd be banned in tournaments for being a broken character XD.
Date: March 11 2014 8:54 AM Title: Imprisonment
Hmmm, this was an excellent chapter, with plenty of my questions answered. Though I still have a few. In particular what happens to an Omega when they do go way too far?
Kayla is...interesting to say the least. I'd like to know more about how she gained so much power. She's a very interesting character to say the least, not nearly as one dimensional as some goddess-esk characters I've seen. What interests me most is her more sadistic side that showed when she was talking about Marion. She's an intelligent and strong woman to be sure, but as they say absolute power corrupts absolutely. It would be interesting to see if has to deal with such corruption and what kind of fail safe she has if she falls and turns into what she's trying to stop.
Author's Response:
We may see that at some point.
I'll eventually get started on that origin story, which will answer a lot of questions I imagine.
Date: March 11 2014 7:59 AM Title: Imprisonment
It's always wonderful when I don't have to worry about complexities like upbringing, mental state, psychology..... Marion = Evil and that's all there is to it!
This mentality is why innocents get put to death - because people treat morality, a very complex issue, like an ad libs connect the dots puzzle. Pro tip: instead of taking the easy way out and throwing a character to the wolves, maybe try developing them? It's tough, but given the amount of 'godlike' powers flying around here you'd think someone would be up to it. I mean, if people in this story can literally read minds you think working out why someone did something and how to change them would be child's play. And if it turns out nothing can change their mind, isn't that kinda why mental institutions exist? Because people who can't play nice - actually are physically unable to do so - need help and support rather than torture and death?
(Sorry, I forgot....boss god Kayla has the ethics of a high schooler. Given the amount of evil Marion has done vs. the amount of evil Kayla has the potential to do (i.e., WILL do, given the apparent immortality), you may be sacrificing the wrong person on the altar of "good vs. evil".)
Well written story though!
Date: March 11 2014 5:25 AM Title: Imprisonment
Such darkness within, this Fire that makes Betas into Omegas, this story is honestly one of the darkest ever to be written on this site. I am sometimes really disturbed by what goes on.
So Marion is meant to be some sort of toy for Claire, fair enough considering what she did. I wonder how will Marion die, some many ways. If she can live then I will be surprised.
The Fire seems to be some sort of living entity, I can't really describe it but it seems to be creating sadists? This might be a problem several generations later. Hopefully Claire is able to fight it. This is all I can say now.
Author's Response:
Not just Betas into Omegas, and I'll say not as many Betas went through the ascension as you might think.
I wouldn't say sadists, not exactly. The way I intended it to be taken is that an Omega being affected by the alteration derives satisfaction from the pain they cause during disciplinary sessions, but not neccessarily from causing pain to just anyone. I still view it as troubling, mind you, and obviously Kayla does, hence her intention to study and attempt to contain it before it does become a problem.
Date: March 09 2014 7:55 AM Title: Imprisonment
I was thinking they do something similar to compression but for an Omega, also because of the husband mention.
Date: March 02 2014 5:55 PM Title: Imprisonment
Ah so does what it does, I was right that it seems that they were trying to permanently shrink Alphas who comitted crimes against Betas and it failed, Kayla might have it. Claire can shrink things but it isn't permanent, it seems Kayla was working on something more permanent.
Author's Response:
Oh no, it was effectively a portable version of the ability that Claire has shown. Think of it as a taser of sorts that happens to shrink something down to ~3 inches tall. Nothing about permanence, though...well, Kayla is never short for new ideas.