Date: March 24 2023 7:07 AM Title: Talia
This was intense!
That narrative style was really raw and personal, which I can really appreciate. It helps us not only see but, in a sense, feel what Alexandra's going through, both physically and mentally, which gives this story its edge. And even from a third person perspective, too!
It also serves as a replacement for really in-depth descriptive writing, allowing us to envision the finer details of the scene ourselves, rather than trying to paint every detail for the reader, which can be a bit cumbersome to read in some cases. In other words, I really like that an action is stated, but then we get to read what and how Alexandra is feeling, instead of a paragraph trying to describe EXACTLY how Talia's finger and tongue feel (not that there's anything wrong with stories that do this, but I think that doing so here would have hindered what you were going for).
I'm also a big fan of the short, choppy paragraph style you chose to go with. It made this story very easy to read and understand who was speaking during each line of dialog, even when it wasn't spelled out for us. But yeah, longer paragraphs can be a real burden to a story, even if they're well written, so keeping them short and sweet was a good call. I also feel like it added to that aforementioned intensity, as it made the story seem to move at a faster pace, if that makes sense.
Alexandra and Talia themselves are pretty interesting as well. I think this story does a really good job of establishing a relationship between the two beyond the text itself. The story starts with a literal question of trust between the two, which is a pretty essential element to any good gentle story. The interaction between them afterward is really tender and sweet, which I think follows up the passionate, visceral meat of the story beautifully.
It's also made clear throughout the story that their roles had been reversed previously, which raises some interesting questions about the shrinking/possible restoration process. However, the story doesn't really go into that, which I think is also a good decision, as it's really more about this particular experience, rather than building lore. Still, this element adds a bit of intrigue to the story, which is appreciated.
But the ending may be my favorite part. Talia's minimal effort could have easily just been stated during the sex scene itself, and it would have been impactful. I've read and enjoyed a ton of scenes that point out that the slightest of movements from a giantess have significant effects on the tinies they're pleasure (or torturing or destroying, depending on the story). But to see the whole experience through Alexandra's eyes, including the exhausting effects that are easy to note afterward, only to find out at the very end that Talia had "barely even touched" her really drives home the power dynamic between the two.
If I could nitpick at one thing, near the end of the story, when Talia is putting her hand in front of Alexandra on the nightstand (which, as the story notes, is a really sweet gesture), you noted that Talia "let her hand fall just short of Alexandra's form." Maybe this is just a personal preference thing, but I feel like the word form is unnecessary. I mean, sure, I guess you could say that Alexandra owns her form, but wouldn't it make more sense to just say that Talia "let her hand fall just short of Alexandra"?
Anyway, I really enjoyed this! Good work!