[Report This]Date: July 13 2021 2:09 PM Title: The new girl
Im really glad you chose to update this story, as it was one of my favorites back in the day. Hopefully you find the yearn to keep on writing because this world is incredible and these characters quite compelling. I'm just hoping to see your vision completed. Godspeed!
[Report This]Date: November 12 2019 8:10 AM Title: Settling In
" Because it normally takes nothing short of catastrophe before seeing any Devex admitting error in their ways".
I feel Cashell is in for a lot of trouble... I thoght Zara would end up losing him in the forest. That is a cool concept. She loses him and almost stomps him to death.
For one moment I feared you had given up on this series! Thank you for not abbandoning it! Please, keep up the good work ;)
PS. Forgot to rate the story in my last review. I am not sure how the site system works, but I hope I gave you 5 stars.
Author's Response:
It's rather unfortunate for Cashel that he is now fated to have Gwen as a roommate. Especially when she might not be so restrained once her predatory instinct's flare up. And that's not to leave out possible foot torment by accident or design.
Glad you enjoyed this story enough to leave a review and good rating.
Date: September 05 2019 5:43 AM Title: Releasing the main attraction
I hope Zara can teach the new girl how to behave around humans.
Date: August 29 2019 5:28 AM Title: Zara's New Home
I am impressed to say the least and I hope you continue this story. You are working with many complex concepts and ideas regarding the war and Devex, and I doubt you will let everything as black and white, good and evil.
As you have shown us, Zara has urges, her predatory instincts towards humans looming over her interaction with Cashel. Than there is Edward and the enigmas he left behind. First about Zara being infatuated of Cashel, a never seen phenomenon (is it just infatuation or there is more to it than meets the eye?). Second, the liberation of more Devex. The bunker can handle 3 Devex, so sooner or later we will get to see Cashel interacting with another blue giantess and Zara interacting with a male Devex.
So far, the story is great at building up tension. Hope you can continue as soon as possible (my curiosity is at its peak with this and other stories of the site XDD).
Thank you for sharing your talent and imagination with us.
Date: August 28 2019 3:28 PM Title: Releasing the main attraction
I just finished the first chapter and had to comment.
You have made a very good start stablishing the two main characters and the conflict of the story. It's also good that you choose to make both protagonists relatively young as it leaves a lot of space to work and grow.
About the characters, I just loved Cashell, from his name to his innocent remarks and reactions. I think this innocence is most important, specially if we think he will interact with not so friendly Devex and with Zara instincts (oh yeah, she is sweet but surely salivated at the sight of human flesh. It is a promising interesting dynamic). Also, what a remarkable attention to details, specially when describing Zara's design.
I will not say much more as I have yet to read the second chapter. I will try to read and review as soon as possible.
Thank you for the hard work of putting up such a good and long first chapter. Also, sorry for any misspelling. Althogh fluent, english is not my primary language.
Author's Response:
I am glad you enjoy the characters and how I set the conflict of this story. Cashel was a name that I really liked as well and due to being raised by parents that brithed him instead of the government he is of a more innocent mindset than most others. As for Zara's design I started with an outline for that before I wrote the first chapter so it's something I really cared about. I put up a long first chapter for this story because I regreted how I went about this with my other story on this site. So I am glad that effort seems to have paid off.
And for someone who's primary language isn't english I have to say you seem to know it better than most that have english as their primary language. If I didn't have spell check then I would be misspelling a word like every sentance I wrote. So don't worry about it and thank you for the review.
[Report This]Date: August 27 2019 11:31 PM Title: Zara's New Home
Damn. What a concept. Feels like watching a good science fiction movie. Great job so far.
Author's Response:
Glad you like the concept of the story and thank you for the praise of how it's turned out so far.
[Report This]Date: August 18 2019 11:15 AM Title: Releasing the main attraction
I'm surprised this hasn't been reviewed yet. I missed your Fracture Factor X the Retroactive story but this one also shows a promising start.
Author's Response:
Thank you for the review on this story and I am glad you think it's got a promising start. As for my Fracture factor X story I plan on putting up chapter 29 in about a week or so.