Date: July 07 2020 8:35 PM Title: Chapter 3B: The Wholesome Adventures of Yuuki Haruko.
I love this but it's obviously missing some chapters(hence the no rating). It's nice to read a series/story made by you that just skips to the good parts from time to time. Understandable if you'd rather work on half inch high(I'm honestly more pleased with and invested in that masterpiece), but if ur looking to take an occassional break from that, I would love to see this get continued.
Anyway, thanks again for sharing your work with us! :)
Author's Response:
A remake for this series will be coming out eventually. Thanks for your nice comment, and all your support
[Report This]Date: September 23 2019 11:06 PM Title: Track Team's Lucky Charm 10k/15k special!
Great chapter! haha
Author's Response:
Glad to know that you enjoyed it! :D
[Report This]Date: September 23 2019 1:10 AM Title: Chapter 5A: The Yandere's grasp and the mistake
HOT!
[Report This]Date: September 23 2019 12:59 AM Title: Chapter 4A: Lovey-dovey Shizu hours
Omg this is getting so good!
[Report This]Date: September 22 2019 1:45 AM Title: Chapter 2: Time to Make Some Choices
OMG! This is so awesome!!
[Report This]Date: September 22 2019 1:18 AM Title: Chapter 1: Just The Beginning
Holy fuck! I'm so loving this story so far!
[Report This]Date: August 25 2019 9:25 AM Title: Chapter 1: Just The Beginning
I think the short chapters help give you choices/inspire you to write more. It looks like it's going to be a very ambitious story with a lot of routes. If you haven't already try to keep some kind of record of how the story is branching out.
My only criticism is it seems a little rushed in places, with the level of description dropping off and just kind of bouncing back and forth between dialogue/character names. Not a huge deal.
Character descriptions are ok, I'll look into this again later!
Author's Response:
Thanks for the feedback. I've also noticed how its inconsistent at times and I really hope to change it. Since I'm a new author I'm still trying to key in my writing style and I feel like I've finally got an idea of what I want it to be. Also I have a little flow chart that gives me a nice idea of how I want the story to be. I'll try to make this a more consistent and enjoyable story to read. Thanks for your review :D
[Report This]Date: July 14 2019 6:21 PM Title: Chapter 2: Time to Make Some Choices
I think you're doing an awesome job for your first story!
You making branching paths will definitely make more work for you, but it'll make the overall story stand out more, so keep strong with it.
Both choices sound interesting to me. Thpugh I do like Akari's tomboyish nature, so I'll lean toward that version.
Good luck with your story!
Author's Response:
Thanks for the feedback! I'm a big fan of your work and that was what kinda inspired me to do the story with multiple routes.
Date: July 13 2019 3:28 PM Title: Chapter 1: Just The Beginning
Interesting so far. Not a lot to comment about on only the first chapter, but looking forwards to see where this goes! (P.S. huge fan of foot odour stuff haha)
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review and your in luck because I'm also a huge fan of foot odor. Stay tuned because there'll be more of that in the future
Date: July 12 2019 4:21 AM Title: Chapter 1: Just The Beginning
Really looking forward to this story, especially the unaware foot component.
Author's Response:
Since this is my first story I really appreciate the feed back and don't worry the first few chapters and maybe some later chapters will be 100% unaware