Date: February 22 2014 12:07 PM Title: Imprisonment
Great story! Just a little confirmation : Is Marion really dead?
Author's Response:
Thank you.
And no, as was mentioned by another commenter, she was regugitated after 2 hours.
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 12:03 PM Title: Work
Thank you! I like it when an author can answer burning questions within the story. Like all the other reviewers, I didn't think my opinion of Marion could get any lower. If things continue on this trajectory, she'll be lucky if she has a quick and relatively painless death. But I would imagine an Alpha that couldn't be rehabilitated would be a failure to an Omega, so I hope that she can come to some nonlethal conclusion for Claire's sake. By allowing interbreeding, the author has tied all the races together, so they don't seem like separate species and have more similarities then differences. I look forward to more!
Author's Response:
Thanks for the kind words :)
I want to leave a little teaser about Marion's future but I'm just barely stopping myself from doing so.
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 9:28 AM Title: Work
A lot world building in this chapter. For starter, it seems some force transforms people into Omegas, and it doesn't seem to have a specific personality type as a prerequisite.
We also learned that all the sizes can inter-reproduce with each other. (When I first read the couple I thought 2 aphas produce beta children, not that 2 alphas expecting a child are there because the child happens to be a beta. Little confusing at first.) Interestingly, it seems a beta and an omega can not have a beta child. So we already know Claire and Corey are step siblings. I wonder if Ashley and Melody are biological.
Chapter notes: Claire doesn't think much of her coworkers, heh.
Marion keeps digging herself deeper and deeper. And she's not even there for most of it. I hope things work out for Stephanie. And poor Noemi, at least if they were mad at what she did it would be understandable, but it's clear it's all about how they look.
It doesn't matter what she decided, Claire still has her brother's life planned out for him. It just so happens that things are working out naturally as she envisions. And "Best Woman"? Either Correy lacks guy friends, or the two are that close.
Author's Response:
Good call on the personality type, though there is a prerequisite of sorts.
Sorry if that was confusing, I'll see if I can't do better on those details in the future.
Melody and Ashley are biological.
Doesn't think much of Alexis, no, but she's fine with Kyle.
And, well, Claire never said she wasn't going to stop wanting what she felt was best for him. That's just how she is, she simply made the decision to support his choices over pushing her own. As for the last bit...well, he just sort of grew up closer to Omegas than he did his fellow Betas due to where he lives. He certainly has Beta friends, but he might not be as close to them.
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 8:15 AM Title: Work
Very interesting to see Claire’s day to day good to see that it’s not all punishment but a lot of helping as well. Best part was we got to see Claire’s happier side even with her previous chapter with Corey it was more sweet and sad than playful.
Hearing more about Stephanie was heartbreaking, getting to the point where her father had to be removed from her life for his own safety. It’s going to be a steep uphill battle but if it can be done it will be very sweet.
Favorite part is all the casual reveals that were dropped into the story and there were a bunch this chapter. Yes Male omegas exist (though I believe this was first confirmed in comments.), yes Omegas were once something else, yes intersized relations can produce children and that includes omega/beta couples (have no idea how that works but awesome), beta genetics can carry over as seen with the alpha/alpha couple though wonder if this means Omegas have had beta children.
Author's Response:
It was nice to shift Claire back a bit for me. I'm hoping to get the chance to go into her personality when not working with the girls a bit more, even if I have to do it in a sidestory. She's...fun.
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 7:30 AM Title: Work
Must be hell for city planners to optimize land use for three different racial sizes, but I digress…
Overall it was a good chapter. Nice of you to introduce Kyle and Alexis after Melody brought them up in the previous chapter.
Naomi must have super strict Asian parents if they disowned her like that and it’s terrible that Marion managed to destroy Stephanie’s family. I hope Naomi and Stephanie come out of this with a better outlook and that Marion doesn’t come out of Claire’s stomach next time.
So it seems beta size is a dominant or recessive gene that alpha’s can pass on to their children. Interesting…
What is more interesting is the “Fire” that Claire mentioned that made Alexis’ parents ascend to Omega’s.
So do we finally meet the enigmatic Dr. Everett next chapter?
Also congradualtions on passing 100 reviews. Not many stories break that mark.
Author's Response:
Expect the Fire to be a pretty important thing, and yes we will be meeting Dr. Everett in the next chapter.
And thank you. When I started this thing I honestly did not expect to get anywhere near this level of feedback on it. It is wonderful motivation.
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 7:25 AM Title: Work
Nice chapter, I knew Claire would accept Melody as Corey's boyfriend, if he's going to date girls bigger than him then at least someone she knows right?
Naomi is just unlucky she had a father who disowned her, not even knowing the full story, I hope he gets his comeuppance, Claire might want to try making friends with her or even getting her to mix with reformed Alphas, the former a bit unlikely unless Claire and Corey have a massive breakthrough and Corey is able to even forgive her for breaking his arm.
Stephanie should patch things up with her father once she gets out of this, she needs to do it, it will be a clear indication that she is reformed and free of Marion's control. Good chapter where you expand on the storyverse.
Author's Response:
Naomi might just meet some people if she can land community service :)
We'll have to see how Stephanie goes. She has the most baggage here by far.
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 6:51 AM Title: Work
Holy character development, batman...rare for a genre usually filled with "excuse plots." More please!
Author's Response:
More shall be coming :)
[Report This]Date: February 22 2014 5:20 AM Title: Imprisonment
Cool chapter, I liked the little "In the Life of an Omega" thing you did in this chapter with Claire...Really gives us readers some perspective as to how Omegas go about their daily lives, and the kinds of work they do besides punishing criminals. Oh, I wanted to know what the interlude means. Is that like your taking a break on this story or is it like a sidestory, or what? Sorry, prolly a dumb question, but yeeeeeaaaahh...
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review.
It's basically a little intervening chapter, and is for the most part separate from the main goings on. Some things will play back into the main action, but it will mostly serve to introduce some things for this universe as a whole.
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 10:53 PM Title: Realize - Part 2
Wow being awake for 30 hour, and still wrote a heart warming chapter. I didn't fine anything that I would criticize.
Hopefully you sleep well and write a even better chapter, if that's possible.
Author's Response:
I'm glad it was enjoyable for you, thanks for the review.
The 30 ended up going to 40. Hoping that doesn't happen again!
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 4:12 PM Title: Realize - Part 2
Well first it was immensely adorable to see Melody struggling to convey her feelings, there’s something about being so incredibly powerful yet still emotionally vulnerable that’s endearing. I wonder how long Corey had been thinking about her in more than a friendly fashion since he didn’t seem surprised or need to think about it.
Now onto the not so cute stuff. 12? 12?! Wow, I mean I should have figured it was more than two, she liked killing the first one too much just settle at one. Even if she liked the one she considered her pet no way she could lay off in the meantime. It makes me wonder if Naomi or Stephanie were aware of this. Granted probably not Naomi, but Stephanie in her ‘don’t care about anything state’ I don’t know. On another note just why hasn’t Melody shared this information yet? Rehabilitation is right out the window now. She’s a serial killer, even if she made every effort to look like she had reformed, I’d never trust her in society at large.
Not to get lost in that reveal however, the word goddess gets thrown around a lot, but Kayla just might be the closest thing to one. The fact that she was able to read Marion’s mind is impressive enough, but she apparently did it from quite a distance away without ever coming into the contact with the girl. That’s horrifyingly impressive. There seems to be a limit in that Kayla has to focus on a specific person separating it from true omniscience but it’s not much of a hindrance.
I don’t think this is necessarily an Omega ability since there’s no reason Claire couldn’t have done that at the start. Perhaps being the first Omega carries some additional perks.
Pkong:
Tyrant seems a bit much since we don’t know just how the current status quo came to be. For all we know the right to protect the rights of Betas was negotiated. Perhaps the Alphas were bribed with some of that Omega technology . Maybe Alphas leadership preemptively fearing what the Omegas might do agreed to their Beta protection demand without the Omegas actually having to do much. Maybe they really are tyrants and toppled Alpha government. At this point we just don’t know just how big a conflict there was or if there was a conflict at all.
Author's Response:
Think of it as two people that are fully aware that they're pretty compatible having a relationship stalled by one of them continuing to assign the other the label of "my little sister's friend." Corey's comment on what an amazing woman she's become is basically that label being discarded, which basically overwhelms him with the things he's always liked about Melody as a person + the sheer power of her little display of affection.
On the next point, I'll simply ask: Given what we've seen of Claire so far, what do you think her immediate reaction would be upon hearing about what Marion's done?
And oh lord is there a lot about Kayla to go into.
Date: February 18 2014 11:01 AM Title: Realize - Part 2
This was a really nice chapter. Very touching and I'm not even into that too much. Very well written in my opinion.
Author's Response:
Thank you, I appreciate the kind words.
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 10:55 AM Title: Imprisonment
Man, to be honest, this universe would suck to live in if you were a beta. Even with Omegas backing them up, its unreasonable to think that theyll be around 24/7 to make sure nothing happens! I think the only real, long lasting solution is to change the minds of Alphas, about Betas. I certainly dont think that Omegas are tyrants but i dont think forcing Alphas to behave around Betas is a long lasting solution...I see it as more of a temporary way of keeping Betas alive and giving them a chance but I think the end goal should be Beta awareness and protection under Alpha laws. GREAT STORY, really makes for good conversation!
Author's Response:
Thank you for the comments, and expect a bit more on other things the Omegas do outside of policing and rehabilitation soon :)
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 9:18 AM Title: Realize - Part 2
That was a good exchange between the two of them, and I'm happy if they'll find some joy together in the time they have.
I'm generally not into giantesses that mistreat tinies, but I've found the actions of Claire at least to be somewhat sexy in the demonstration of her power. I guess the major difference is these are not innocent bystanders. But more than that, it's the ability of the giantess to feel bad for the tiny, to have some compassion. It means the tinies have a chance, that while they may be at her mercy, there actually is mercy to be had. I hope Claire and at least two of those girls continue to bond, and maybe even a chance for Correy to reconcile with them. That little guy is a saint, and I like that there's an element of forgiveness to aid in the redemption of two of the girls.
But wow, doesn't look like there will much hope for Marion. 12 is a lot more than I was expecting, and they know about them too. I don't know how I feel about them Turing it into a sick game of false hope for Marion, but it raises another question. Correy asks his sister to treat the girls fairly because he didn't agree with Dr. Everett transferring them into her custody. Melody seems to think taking them away from Jenna was a decision to give them a fair chance. Without having met the good doctor, I'm not sure who is right.
Author's Response:
I really couldn't do this story with a girl that didn't have some level of compassion and empathy, and generally I consider Claire to be a middle ground between Melody and Jenna (though Jenna herself isn't absent of compassion). A nice mix of domination/meanness that she enjoys to an extent, but with limits placed on that enjoyment due to her own character. I'm looking forward to letting that dominance play out in a more...gentle matter eventually.
We're getting close to the interlude so I'll just let the last bit be :)
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 7:37 AM Title: Imprisonment
I liked this chapter, a nice heartwarming scene mixed among the serious nature of most of it.
Author's Response:
Honestly couldn't have done most of the chapter without coupling it with the sweeter bits
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 6:54 AM Title: Realize - Part 2
I can see how living with two omegas and having omega friends would skew Corey’s perception and now he has finally discovered just how vulnerable he is, but he should be grateful he has multiple 3000+ foot pillars to hold him up and care for him. Melody chose her words well to pull him back from that mire of depression.
Also… thank you, thank you for not making Melody’s confession to Corey drawn out. The “will they, won’t they” thing is fine but it’s great when two characters ‘realize’ that they want to be together. I know I’m jealous of Corey now ><
Well this chapter ended kind of on a downer. Marion has killed 12 betas? I should be surprised but I’m not. She could have captured stray betas like that girl, stolen a beta, or bought smuggled betas. She could pay off police officers to keep their mouths shut about it.
Hm I thought that was Claire speaking in Marion’s head at the end of the previous chapter, but Dr. Everett has some form of telepathy? I wonder how Omega abilities work. Are they natural or are they taught depending on the job the Omega wants to do. Does Melody have the power to shrink people even if she’s not an enforcer?
@Pkong
I can’t say I agree or disagree because we don’t have enough information. All we can do is speculate about it. We don’t know if alpha government were completely unwilling to treat betas like people before the omegas arrived. We don’t know if force was the only option available to omegas to make the alphas change. So far all evidence points to the alphas treating betas like second class citizens at best before the omegas showed up. Corey is the first of his generation to actually go to a beta university, implying the betas had none before the omegas showed up. This implies the alphas were treating betas like shit.
The omegas probably don’t give a damn what the alphas think because their modus operandis is about betas, the race that had no voice before the omegas showed up.
As for getting philosophical over a GTS story, if the story is making you think that way I think that’s a good thing. Akbar is crafted a fine universe that even if we don’t know a lot about is packed with enough detail and great characters to keep me interested.
Author's Response:
Yeah, I wanted to go ahead and kickstart this relationship because the two have known eachother for a long time and it made sense to me to go ahead and have them take this first step
I was surprised that "No" didn't get more comments, though in hindsight I should have included the word "unfamiliar" in Marion's description of that voice.
Expect a bit more info on their abilities within a few chapters.
[Report This]Date: February 18 2014 6:31 AM Title: Imprisonment
Melody's risky move paid off and how could Corey say no to such a lovely girl? I think Claire should be fine with it, she knows Melody well enough and the two do seem to have feelings for each other.
As for Marion, damn! She killed twelve Betas? What the-I can't even wrap my head around it.
@pkong, that is how I feel about it but it might be useful to know how bad things were for Betas in the pre-Omega world, were they treated like animals or was it equality but with widespread discrimination and the Alpha government unable to enforce any laws protecting them.
Author's Response:
Expect Claire's opinion next chapter :)
Date: February 18 2014 12:53 AM Title: Imprisonment
So I don't usually take part in debates in review form, but since there have been so many people commenting on the justice system of this world I want to get one final word in. This is going to get a bit more philosophical than a fictional GTS story probably warrants but I want to make this point clear. Who knows maybe this will give the author some ideas :)
When I asked “What sets omegas apart from Marion” Some people responded that they only get physical against Alphas who broke the law and that they have a system that they are held accountable too. I get that, but it is besides my point. My point is about power and authority.
If you go out and commit a crime and get arrested by a cop, who gives that cop the authority to arrest you? Answer: the people. Cops answer to the police chief who answers to the mayor who answers to voters. The laws they enforce are likewise ultimately created by the people. That is where law enforcement is supposed to get its power: That Is Justice.
But where do Omega's get their authority from in this story? I doubt they answer to the alphas government and I doubt the laws they enforce were created by alphas. Can Alphas vote out the director of the Omegas? I doubt it. That is not justice.
It is beside the point that Omegas are likely on the side of right and their actions are stopping horrific violence against betas. My point is Omegas used their size to force their world view on Alphas. They decreed new laws that alphas had no say about and killed anyone who opposed them. They are tyrants whose authority comes from nothing but the use of force and violence: power that comes with their size. Their good intentions are irrelevant. Their “system” is meaningless because it is forced on an unwilling populace who have no say in its operations.
In the end this is the same thing Marion (and alphas in general) did to betas. She thought she was superior because of her size. She used her power to force her worldview on them. The fact that Marion did it for pleasure and Omegas do not is also irrelevant. They both wield power in the same way for basically the same reason: because they feel their size entitles them to tell smaller people how to behave and they punish any who says otherwise. That’s why I feel Omegas are hypocrites.
Author's Response:
I just want to respond to this to let you know that I read it. I don't feel I can actually respond in-depth due to the fact that I still have a lot of stuff to write, but I do want to acknowledge your opinion on the matter and to thank you for sharing it.
[Report This]Date: February 14 2014 4:24 PM Title: Realize - Part 1
I think this was a very valuable chapter, not just because I’m a big fan of the gentle scenes, but Corey’s realization really allows us to step back and remember just what happened.
With their chapters it’s been easy to understand and even sympathize with Naomi and Stephanie but it can’t be overstated that they nearly killed Corey and the only reason he’s alive is because Claire came across them.
While I feel both characters can be redeemed it’s good that the story can step back and remind us that they are being punished for damn good reason.
On Melody’s perspective count me amongst those wondering just how an Omega/Beta relationship works even more so than previously. The size issue was the most obvious obstacle, but with Melody’s admittance that she will outlive him then the question of just how long do Omegas live.
While this could be tragic, at the same time Corey and Claire’s parents have been together for years and presumably happy for years, also the threat of Corey’s mortality didn’t make Melody hesitant but more eager not to waste time. So I guess it’s just a matter of perspective.
Date: February 14 2014 3:08 PM Title: Realize - Part 1
This just occurred to me, the girls circumvented the system to teach Melody's sister a lesson because they didn't trust a random Omega to do it. That detail alone is pretty telling.
And maybe tragedy is too strong a word. But the knowledge that they can't grow old together, that one will depart before that leaving the other alone for an indeterminate amount of time has got to be a little sad going in. (It was also an issue in Titan: Physics.)
[Report This]Date: February 14 2014 1:37 PM Title: Realize - Part 1
The fetishy part of me enjoyed Mels in house techniques.
That out of the way this story keeps getting better and better with each new chapter.