Date: November 30 2016 6:01 PM Title: Chapter 1
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Date: September 10 2011 3:29 PM Title: Chapter 1
very good so far. I would stick with laonger chpaters. Loved the evil sister.
Date: September 08 2011 4:07 PM Title: Chapter 3: Sisterly toture
I could understand the first chapter being a bit short, but I do have to critic these last two, and I have to say they weren't bad, but they weren't good either, you need more details and you need to relay to the reader how the main character is reacting to the situation.
Author's Response:
ok thanks
Date: September 08 2011 1:20 PM Title: Chapter 2: One hell of a day
Wow, I go away to grab a bite to eat and there's two new chapters. I asusme Ms, Ackle is his tutor. I hope April isn't too rough with Jerome.
Author's Response:
Yes Ms. Ackle is the tutor. I forgot to list her as one.
Date: September 08 2011 6:10 AM Title: Chapter 1
Short, but I like it. Just make sure to proofread it properly because I noticed quite a mistakes. Mainly missing letters or letters that don't need to be there. You're spelling quite good - it's jut your grammar. I can't wait to find out where the story will go. Will Jerome find love maybe?
Author's Response: maybe
Date: September 08 2011 3:39 AM Title: Chapter 1
Very nice set up, I can't wait to read more.