Reviewer: Stepbonk Signed
Date: May 15 2019
Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1 - The New Girl
Oh yeah, I think good writing and sensible storytelling is hugely important (looking at you, Game of Thrones!). On the other hand I can't stand the way shows like Star Trek forcefully tie things together by nerding out, making sure both the audience and the characters understand exactly what's going on through painfully annoying and seemingly unnecessary technobabble dialogue. Nor do they ever simply admit when their writers make a mistake or decide to throw away an old rule for convenience, but insist on retconning it. Initially I was thinking maybe Olivia just steps on some sort of growth ray platform every morning and shrinks back down on the same platform when she leaves work, along with shrinking whatever she's carrying, and then the E-Reactor would offer a more powerful growth capability not limited to the size of the original platform. Your setup has some limitations but it certainly allows for some interesting possibilities, and I guess the E-Reactor and related technological advances might add an entirely new dimension to the whole thing. I'm also taking Jack's claims at face value for the moment, maybe he's not telling the full truth either.
If Olivia and Jack are still able to breathe, it seems like ordinary molecules must get entangled with active macro/micro particles once they're sufficiently absorbed, so perhaps Olivia can safely eat something if she waits long enough to digest it and eventually expels whatever her body doesn't absorb? If she eats something with micro particles in it, will her body just flush it out or will the micro particles get expelled by the dominant macro particles already set in? Also keep in mind nail polish and clothing, these girls must be getting a fresh dose of macro particles every day so it all grows with them.
Meh, I'll let you figure things out to your satisfaction unless you feel like you're getting stuck somewhere. If you find it getting too complicated, I would just edit a few lines in the last few chapters so the collar is still there, but it's more like a safety mechanism which is required to be used in conjunction with the company's shrinking/growing platform/ray, in order to prevent giants from running amok at large, or random unqualified people shrinking themselves and others as a stupidly dangerous prank. In that case its purpose would be to restore the wearer to normal size if they try to goof off (or whatever it's tricked into thinking normal size is...). Then either Olivia's sock is still huge back at Jack's house and his clothes are still tiny at hers (definitely simplest and most flexible), or else the collar's safety effect is weaker and slower when it acts on something being inappropriately removed from the wearer's body, due to other considerations (such as averting the possibility of shrinking someone with the collar by shaking their hand and then letting go, say).
Under that alternative scenario, if you want it to get real wild, maybe with a little hacking the collars have the ability to arbitrarily dial back and forth between their max/min size as set by the platform and "normal", along with everything inbetween, and the E-Reactor will be found capable of resetting just what "normal" is in addition to its intended use as a power source. In the meantime perhaps Olivia can shrink and grow stuff by holding onto it when she changes size whether using the collar or the company platform, and Jack can make ladies grow a bit by reducing himself to midget size and growing while holding their hands (or that other kinky thing I suggested).
Looking forward to the next installment, whenever it comes!
Author's Response: To your comment about Jack's claims being truthful: there's what he says to her and then there's the narrative dialog that betrays that he was telling the truth. I'm OK with deception but we're deliberately telling the reader that he's being truthful, so to just spontaneously say he's lying later in the story would be very underwhelming. I won't do it.
The "how can they breathe/walk/etc physics I'm disregarding, as all growing/shrinking stories have to do. Some amount of suspension of disbelief is necessary. These physics are impossible. The best you can do is establish a consistent set of rules for a fictional world, and abide by it. I don't think it's too complicated, it's actually pretty fun. It's already been worked out, what Olivia can and cannot do. I'm really enjoying writing this story, to tell the truth.