April 26, 2015

Hey diary, me again. Got something kinda weird for you this time. So there's this girl at school, or, at least, there *was* this girl at school, named Tawny. She'd been really sick for, like, two or three years or something, showed up at school off-and-on. I never really knew her, but a couple of my friends did.

Anyway we decide to visit her a few days ago (pretty good timing too, 'cause she died yesterday), and she has this surprise for all of us. Everyone there gets an iClone of her. I know, right? It's weird. She says that it's, like, to remember her by or something. The clones aren't sick, they're fine, so they're going to outlive her and we can all have a piece of her to live on or whatever.

So we peace out of there a little bit later and split up. I dunno what everyone else did with their Tawnys, but I just stuck mine in my purse and drove home. Like - what else was I going to do? I didn't even know her that well! I get home and I take her out and set her on the table, and I start thinking about all the costs that are gonna go into this, you know? Keeping her and feeding her and taking care of her and shit. Little Tawny is talking about how she wants an aquarium. As if.

So instead of doing all that, I just treat her the same way I always treat lost iClones: I pin her down under my finger and make her tell me all her important online info. Her paypal, her bank account, that sort of thing. It took some doing, but once I had the potato peeler in hand, she sang like a bird, lol. Besides, it's not like she's going to be using her money anymore, right? So I might as well take it.

After that she starts crying about how "horribly" I'm treating her and how she can't understand why someone would be so "cruel". I reminded her that it's because she's a fake person, and we were never even friends to begin with, and she just cried even harder! Hahah. I probably would've started using the peeler on her right then, except that my boyfriend came over right then. After stripping Little Tawny naked so he'd have a nicer view (gotta admit, the girl looked good,) we just started talking like she wasn't there. He was looking at her body, of course, but then I noticed that she was looking at his, too.

I forced her to admit that she thought he was good-looking, and that's when he just laughed in her face. She got so red, and started tearing up again, which I guess was like her go-to mode at this point. God, she was such a crybaby. Daniel made some joke about how she was so small we could probably kill her with a flyswatter, and lo-and-behold, I happened to have one in my kitchen! We took turns hitting her with it, and she curled into a ball, her back and side going all red from how hard we were hitting her. We must have swung a hundred times, but I guess even iClones aren't that pathetic. She lived, just bruised all over.

By that point, Daniel was getting pretty hard. You could see it through his jeans, and anyway I was tired of the little twerp. I picked her up in my hand and brought her to my face, making her look me in the eyes, and was all like, "Oh, Tawny, I'm so sorry, we were just having fun, I didn't mean to really hurt you, can you ever forgive me?" It's so stupid when they fall for that! But sure enough she looks up at me, still sniveling, and says that it's okay, she forgives me, it must be hard learning to handle tiny people.

Lol. I never had a harder time keeping a big dumb grin off my face.

"Oh yeah, you're right, I totally care about your existence." As I'm saying that, I'm curling my fingers around her, and I can tell she's starting to realize something's wrong. She tries to get to her feet, but I'm already keeping her pinned, and even still just being like "We love you Tawny, we'll never hurt you, can you possibly forgive us?"

To her credit, she didn't start screaming 'til the first bone cracked. She threw her weak little body against my fingers as hard as she could, pleading and blubbering for mercy, and I just tilted it so that Daniel could have a better view. Together we watched her die like a bug, slowly scrunching in the palm of my hand. God, I could crush a thousand iClones like that, feeling them just snap and twist and collapse in on themselves... it's like nothing else in this world.

When she was smushed and gone, I was gonna go to the kitchen sink to wash off, but instead he just threw me on the couch and took me right there. It was... more than a little hot, I gotta say, but now I have gross-girl stains all over my cushions that I'll have to wash out. And hey, I'm like five hundred bucks richer now (she didn't even have the decency to die with a little more cash in her accounts? Rude :p)

I wonder what the others did with their iClones. Can't believe Tawny didn't realize nobody likes her.