I pick up speed as I near the staircase, probably because it’s given me more room to make my descent. As I hover centimetres below the cream plaster of the ceiling, it really gives me the feeling of walking around as a regular kid. Spiralling downstairs using my little invention could almost pass as me walking down, without having to ask for assistance. In a way, flying is freedom. Actually, screw that in a way crap. Flying is freedom. While I’m suspended hundreds of midget stories in the air, I feel a sense of accomplishment. It means I can get around the house normally. Pretty much straight after I’m soaring downstairs, I begin to envision myself flying to school amidst a flock of geese.
Is it a bird?
Is it a plane?
Nope, it’s MiniMark!!! Protector of midget-kind!
Being the insane, sarcasm-fuelled maniac I am, I begin laughing out loud as I dive headfirst downstairs, the wind propelling me to the ground. Just before I hit the coatrack, I raise my arms and the wind currents catch under the sheet of plastic, sending me airborne again. I float almost gracefully into the kitchen, where Cam and Mum are snacking on a pack of crisps and chatting at the bench. I narrow my eyes, squinting across the expanse of the kitchen at the chip packet, licking my lips. I steer in that direction, arms spread wide like the wings of a pretty demented bird.
Just as I reach the chip packet, I fling my right arm out, catching the corner of an oily chip and lugging it upwards with me.
“Wha-?!” Cameron yelps, causing me to practically piss myself laughing as I float back towards the ceiling, out of reach. Mum stifles a giggle herself at my younger brother’s reaction. Once I’m positive that no one’s going to come and grab me form this height, I poke my tongue out at Cam, who scowls in response.
“Who’s the puny one now, huh?” I scoff, both my mother and Cameron appearing smaller from this angle.
“I’m looking at him.” Cameron shoots back with a smug smile. I narrow my eyes in mock anger and peg the piece of chip at him, watching in satisfaction as it falls into his messy blonde hair. He brushes it off instantly and I giggle.
Mum stands up from her seat brushes chip seasoning off her hands. “Well, I’ll leave you two to it then. I’ve got paperwork to do, courtesy of your father.” She walks across the kitchen, heels clicking on the tiles and is about to disappear from my view when she pokes her head through the doorway. “Be careful with your brother, Cameron.” She warns, earning her a glare from me as I hover above her.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask.
Mum turns away from me towards Cam, and they seem to eye each other off for a few seconds before Cameron chuckles. As she leaves, I do a little twirl in mid-air, before resuming my casual hovering directly over Cameron’s dickhead. He rolls his eyes and stands up, the creaking of his chair causing me to wince a little. Even when standing, he can’t reach me. It feels amazing to be taller than my brother for once.
“How’s the view from up there?” He asks teasingly.
“Quite good actually!” I grin, spreading my arms wide and performing a neat somersault in mid-air. “Bro, have you gotten shorter?”
Cameron rolls his eyes and reaches for his chair. Making sure it’s balanced on the tiled floor; he steps up onto it, the height advantage meaning he can now reach my level. I let out a yelp as his arm swings round to grab me and snap my arms to my sides, diving lower down to pick up momentum. Just as I’m about to hit the ground and end my life, I throw my arms out, spiralling back up towards the ceiling, now resuming my casual floating about two metres away from my brother.
“That’s cheating!” I laugh, sticking out my tongue.
Cameron smirks, stepping down from the chair and peering up at me. “Should I get out the vacuum?” He asks, more to himself than to my face. I bite my lip.
“You wouldn’t!” I challenge, hoping he’ll drop the topic. Anyone who hasn’t undertaken the process of getting sucked up clean through the nozzle of a common vacuum cleaner before would not understand the pain going through my head. Cameron used to suck me up for fun… and I don’t get the joke. Dust is my enemy as a midget, and charging towards a whole bucket load of the stuff isn’t exactly my forte…
“Oh but I would!” Cameron jeers, pushing the chair back into place and beginning to cross the room.
In an instant, I realise that this is no bluff and float desperately away in the direction of the front door, my arms spread wide to pick up the momentum. My mind whirls around like a top, searching for ideas of a decent hiding place. There’s no use running from a giant fourteen year old, even on a good day. I grit my teeth, zooming across the length of the lounge room with my arms close to my sides, just as the front door opens with a sharp creak…
VVVVVRRRRROOOOOMMMMM!
I yelp, the sound of the vacuum dangerously close by. As the door continues to open, I seize the opportunity to slip through the widening gap and out into the front garden, Cameron in close pursuit, armed with the machine of mass midget destruction. As I swerve back around to dodge his attacks though, two figures catch my eye from the doorstep. The normal sized one, a woman in her late forties is clearly Ebony’s mum. She smiles warmly up at me as I hover just overhead. And sitting on her mother’s shoulder, waving and smiling just as widely is Ebony.
And before I can yell at her to duck for cover, her smaller body is whipped backwards through the nozzle of the vacuum cleaner, just as my brother barges through the door. “Gotcha!” He yells triumphantly, the sounds of Ebony’s body hitting the sides of the plastic tube attached to the vacuum’s nozzle causing me to wince. It’s only when she’s deposited swiftly into the dust collection chamber that Cam bothers to scan his surroundings… and meet my eyes. And then seconds later Ebony’s Mum’s. His mouth drops open, as if his jaw has been permanently unhinged. “W-w-w-what are you doing o-o-o-outside the v-v-v-vacuum?” He asks me, voice beginning to shake.
Ebony’s mother isn’t impressed. “And what is Ebony doing in it?” She says, a tad too harsh for my brother’s liking. He lets out a faint whimper and instantly drops the vacuum, fumbling for the clasp on the side for unloading the dust collection.
“I’m sorry Mrs Sawyer!” He mumbles sheepishly, as he manages to undo the plastic capsule. I spiral down to the ground, landing on his giant shoulder. Cameron doesn’t even flinch as I poke my tongue out at him. “This is your fault, Marco.” He hisses, knowing full well I can hear it.
“Um… who was the one who decided to get out the vacuum?” I counter.
“Shut up!”
“Where’s your mother, anyway?” Mrs Sawyer asks, frowning at Cameron as he fiddles with the vacuum. As soon as the words have left her mouth, none other than mum herself jogs to the doorstep, panting slightly and grinning.
“Hi Pauline. Sorry about the wait… oh.” Mum’s voice trails off as she sees Cameron and the vacuum. She purses her lips when she realises that I’m safely atop his shoulder, rather than inside the thing. “Cam, Marcus?” She asks awkwardly. “What are you doing with the vacuum?”
“Good question.” Mrs Sawyer mutters icily.
My mother sighs. “What exactly have I missed?”
Before Cameron can make a grab for me, I leap off his shoulder and land in a roll on the gritty concrete path, craning my neck to meet the eyes of the two giantess women before me. “Cameron sucked up Ebony, thinking it was me.” I say coolly.
“Why you little!”
Cameron narrows his eyes and whips out his hand, catching me none-too-gently around the waist. I smirk at him as he brings me up to his face, his eyes practically throwing daggers at me. The hand around me tightens, tree trunk sized fingers pinning my arms to my sides. “Good pun there, bro with the ‘little’ part.” I gasp out, smiling through the torture my lungs are experiencing from being crushed in someone’s iron grip. “I’ve taught you w-w-well.”
Cam’s reaction is to squeeze me even tighter, and only then does our mother intervene. “Cameron!” She snaps tightly. I wince in pain at the amplitude. “Put Marcus down and get Ebony out of the bloody vacuum!”
Instantly, the immense pressure around me waist and chest vanishes, and I drop the last few centimetres to the ground, landing in a sloppy heap on the concrete. After a few seconds to catch my breath, I’m on my feet, running my hands over my body checking for broken bones, as I’ve done my whole life when after I’ve pissed off Cameron. I rotate my upper body, earning a sharp crack from my hips. “Geeze, bro!” I taunt. “Have you been working out or something? That grip was like fricking king kong!”
“Marcus.” Mum warns. “Do I need to scold you too?”
“Can someone please help my daughter?” Mrs Sawyer asks softly, over our bickering.
“You heard Pauline, Cameron.” Mum snaps instantly. “Get her out… before I punch something.”
“You do realise that there’s barely any oxygen in there, right?” I hiss up at Cam, earning a swift roll of the eyes. I shrug. “Just saying- from experience.”
“Shut up, Marcus!” Cameron hisses, finally managing to unhinge the cylindrical dust collection port from the vacuum shell. Instantly, a muted round of coughing and spluttering can be heard from inside the jar sized capsule.
“Am I dead?” Ebony asks.