[Report This]Date: July 10 2018 8:59 AM Title: MAJOR/minor SPECIAL: One Little Moment
Damn it, it's harder to write down a comment worthy of your work than a random short story ! It's a testament of how good this chapter was in my eyes.
First, because I really liked how you highlighted the differences between MAJORS and minors. But also because how you expanded on the Ferrand's daily life in a way I hadn't even thought about. Of course Lindsey goes running very early, so as to not bother her brother who needs more sleep and never had much reason to be a morning person. Simple but effective world-building !
Then, I really like how the two L and I are playing each other. I still don't think that Lindsey would be a fitting partner for Izzy, she is too young and bruning hot to be able to keep a committed relationship going (thought Izzy could probably makes it works, or any Minor with some will for it to last). Somehow, I even think that Lisa would be a greater helper for Little Lind to discover her sexuality and all. The sexy Yodamiene to the dashing Lindsey Ferwalker, I guess.
Finally, I really liked that you gave Lindsey such a gift after all the rough treatment she has gotten in New Lives. Spoiler, but the next chapters will deal with it, and most of her problems will at least start to be dealt with in the upcoming chapters. But my mean streak makes me wait with glee the moment Sabrina will learn about the whole thing, gnyhéhéhé !
Ps: I can't wait to be writing the corssover chapters, so many great characters to toy with that you created, I'm like a child in a toy factory right now.
Date: July 10 2018 7:37 AM Title: MAJOR/minor SPECIAL: One Little Moment
Lindsay did deserve something nice
[Report This]Date: July 07 2018 2:42 PM Title: MAJOR/minor SPECIAL: One Little Moment
Good to see an update from you! I hope you're doing well, or at least, better!
Not so nice to see that you're in pain and exhausted :(
Well, at least we have an update for the story!
I really love this story so much!
And you're right, Lindsey deserves something nice!
Also, Thanks for writing even under these circumstances!
Author's Response:
Well truthfully I'm not even a full month from my surgery yet so I'm actually moving a little fast on be writing again. I take that as a sign of good recovery. But yeah updates might be slow or random or not at all for a few months.
Lindsey's had an incredibly rough time in New Lives. Like wow! Kurogane's got kind of a cruel streak. I figure Izzellah finally being around would at least lift her spirits a bit.
Thanks for reading under these circumstances!
[Report This]Date: July 07 2018 6:44 AM Title: MAJOR/minor SPECIAL: One Little Moment
I’m very happy to hear you’re doing better. I was really worried about you and I’m super relieved to see you back.
Pain sucks and I really hope you continue to improve. I’ve heard that selenium can help healing, you might ask about that.
Speaking of improving...you have really captured some sweetness in this scene. It had a loveliness and a lightness that you have touched on before, but you really mastered in the interaction between Izzy, Lind, and Lisa. You created an atmosphere of humor and friendship that was a joy to see.
In the past, Lindsay has shown herself to be a “biggies know best” type (the issue with not telling Rando about his flight situation is a good example) so she doesn’t seem like she would be the best choice for Izzy.
However, I truly enjoyed how Izzy made her rethink her prejudices and behaviors. In this, Izzy is doing a heroine’s job and inspiring those around her to question things that need questioned and maybe even change for the better. Though she’s doing it passively again...but I won’t bring up the “too passive Izzy” thing again, 'cuz yer sick and all.
Feel better and keep notes when you feel too beat up to write...and look into voice recognition software, I think it’s a feature on windows 10, so you don’t have to type.
God, I am such a nag....
Peace
pix
Author's Response:
Thanks for the well wishes! Eh it's not so bad really, it's mostly just frustrating. Your mind wants to do stuff but your body says "no" or "only for a half hour" or only is your sitting on like fifteen pillows in a very specific way that makes it hard to type". Stuff like that.
Thanks for the praise on the writing. They've only just arrived so I don't think there should be too much drama yet. I was also trynig to highlight one of the traits of minors which is that they have a sort of calming effect on MAJORS, especially if it's just Lindsey. No Sabrina there to quip at her this morning.....yet. I'm glad it worked.
Don't know if Izzy and Lindsey are right for each other. I do know Lindsey clearly has a pretty huge crush which can be sweet but also heartbreaking. Come to think of it Izzellah also has a crush on someone that probably won't work out...Hmmmm.
Can't do much about Izzy being passive yet. She's a guest in someone else's home with an actual giant with an insane amount of power over everyone! As fun as it would be to have Izzy take charge and confront Shannon and steal Alejandro from her and take Lindsey too why not, and rebrand minorthingsmattertoo inot something better, and become a hip celebrity slash trillionaire,.....you need to build up to that stuff.
As always thank you for the great feedback!