Reviewer: Dolphinslash Signed [Report This]
Date: October 15 2017 12:26 PM Title: Chapter 2: MAJOR/first step (part one)

the characters in this were really cute! can't wait to see where it goes.

Author's Response:

I can't wait to see another comment! Thanks a lot!

Reviewer: pixl8ed Signed [Report This]
Date: October 14 2017 10:27 AM Title: Chapter 2: MAJOR/first step (part one)

     Okay, now I LOVE Izzy.
     She can out gumption Scarlet O’Hara! 

     Of course, part of gumption is common sense.  She comes off as overconfident that verges on stupid.  She seems to be hyper aware of the capabilities of majors then forgets what they can do when she’s imagining ways to deal with them.
     Now, I really gotta ask a question writer to writer...if mace doesn’t work on the big dummies why do they make it?  Are they imaging roving bands of wild minors assaulting majors so they need some otherwise harmless chemical to defend themselves?  And why doesn’t Izzy know it’s useless?  The baton sounds equally pointless.
    However, (here’s my solution, be ready with my no-prize) if these big jerks are so blasted superior then it’s possible that items like mono-molecular blades or vibratory blades are avaliable.  Or even vibratory mono-molecular blades.  Izzy would be on one of those like a major on an un-bonded minor.  And it’s used to cut metal, so she’d want one for her tool kit anyway. 
     Of course, she’s probably just playing at being dumb.  If she let it be known that she had an item that could hurt one of these oversized monkeys she’d be risking having it taken from her.  So maybe she put the mace and baton “out there” to see if they got taken.  And if they did, she’d still have “Mr Cutty Cut Cuts.” 
     And the beauty of it is, you’ve already set it up!  Something like that would cut through a major’s achilles tendon with no problem.

    I don’t like how all the biggies think they are entitled to her.  Well, I do like that, as a story element.  I’m with Izzy, I just don’t like them. 
     I’d would be interesting to see Izzy stop being a blunt instrument with this Sabrina.  Maybe say things to her like “I know it’s hard for someone as entitled as you to empathize with someone like me, but I don’t like to be carried.”  Though I can see why she wouldn’t bother.  She seems to enjoy being disrespectful and inconsiderate.  There are tons of minors being “put in there proper place” all around her and all she can think is that’s good enough for Izzy.  She, like all her kind, seem so caught up in there own superiority,  The can't see that Izzy doesn't have to be superior to be special.  

     Great set up.  Izzy has really got a long road ahead of her.  I have to ask why she’s not just attending college via the internet though?  If all she wants is the knowledge.  The big dummies around her clearly aren’t capable of being anything but a distraction. 

     I love that her dad was willing to spend the day with her.  He is a wonderful (literally) supporting characher.  He just breaths empathy.  He still seem to be caught up in the idea that Izzy needs to bod...at leat that's what I got from his conversation with Sabrina's mom.  But she might just be able to teach him a thing or two.

     As far as bonding...what if Izzy really is right?  What if it is something the biggies need more?  The biggies have enough advantages. 

     Great character.  I’m hooked.  Thanks for sharing this.

Peace

pix

Author's Response:

Huh?...Okay lets see if I can answer these.

First the mace and baton was more for a joke than an actual solution. Izzy got it as part of a minor outdoor survival kit online. It's meant to protect her from animals not people. 

Izzy is overconfident. Just the fact that she thinks she can beat a MAJOR with a baton and mace shows it. She's really niave in this world due to semi isolation. Everything she knows about MAJORS comes from her papa or she read online. As far as lazer blades and stuff? I think might exist in this world's technology level but they sound expensive so I doubt Izzy could get one on her allowance. Her dad definitely won't buy her one. No tendon cutting for Izzy. It was just a threat because of Mabels comments on her father and bonding. I doubt she's even thought of the logistics in trying.

Izzellah might warm up to Sabrina but Mabel kind of threw a wrench in those developments for the moment. We'll see what happens with them but for the day Izzy will probably be getting some good cardio in.

Going to school isn't just about knowledge for Izzy. She's looking for a certain kind of knowledge so she can be more independent. Minors are kind of limited in the life skills department. Going to school is just as much about the social interactions for her. Again this will be elaborated on eventually so stay tuned.

And bonding well.....just wait and find out. Or start guessing wildly! Cyborgs! I don't know why but it's cyborgs!

Was that it? I think that was it...Thanks for the comment pix! 

 

Reviewer: AdamX Signed [Report This]
Date: October 14 2017 6:50 AM Title: Chapter 2: MAJOR/first step (part one)

The bonding/not bonding begins, Izzy might be the most dangerous tiny yet.

Author's Response:

I'm interested in what you mean by that. Realistically any confrontaion between Izzy and a MAJOR would end badly for her. She's kind of all bark. Not that she doesn't think she's perfectly capable. Honestly will just have to see how that would work out.