Reviewer: Stubbornstain Signed [Report This]
Date: January 06 2015 1:24 PM Title: Payback's A Cassie

This is a crucial moment in the story it seems, however I felt there could have been more detail in the chapter. The chapter is clearly supposed be be quite tense but description of the critical parts was rather brief I felt. It alsmost seemed, dare I say it, rushed. I don't want to come across as rude. My feeling is there needs to be 'more meat on these bones', as they say. Well, you know, it's a decent chapter but it needs more...descriptive language...which should help add to the tension.

Author's Response:

Okay, I'll do my utmost to improve upon it. You're right about it being a crucial moment in the story but fret not, it's not the only one, there's at least two more of those moments on the way although I won't tell you what they're about. Thanks for pointing these things, they really help with improving the story. 

Reviewer: Carycomic Signed [Report This]
Date: November 01 2014 10:42 AM Title: Payback's A Cassie

You certainly know how to weave a riveting tale. I tore through all seven of these chapters in one sitting!

:-D

Author's Response:

Thanks , its been a while since I've seen you review a story of mine! 

Reviewer: chrlorez Signed [Report This]
Date: October 31 2014 9:30 AM Title: Payback's A Cassie

I'm glad Alvin is finally not getting treated like shit. But revenge is a double-edged sword, my friend. Swing wisely, or you will take yourself down as well. Alvin and Wendy should work out their problems. A little brother/sister character development is a good thing. Otherwise, you might as well kill Wendy off in a fiery explosion. That or have Alvin be the ultimate bully. Wouldn't that be an ironic and interesting turn of events!

Author's Response:

 How true, revenge is like a lightsaber and like you said, swing too far and you'll cut yourself in two. 

I think it would be highly unlikely for Wendy to die that unless I let Michael Bay write the rest of the story. It would be really interesting to see Alvin be the one bullying her, using Cassie to torment Wendy, to really break her. Whether the brother-sister dynamic goes that way remains to be seen, it could easily swing either way. 

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed [Report This]
Date: October 30 2014 10:40 PM Title: Payback's A Cassie

Cool chapter! I definitely think Wendy deserved it, however, what happens when Wendy and Alvin are home together? Cassie isn't gonna be able to do much of anything to help him then. Also did Cassie just say Alvin was one of her closest friends?

I didn't think they were friends already, I thought Cassie was just helping Alving out of guilt? Either way it does seem kinda soon for Cassie to say something like that after they only met the day before.

Chapter was great, just that little detail kinda threw me for a loop. I can't wait to read more of this, its one of my favorite newer stories on this site.

Author's Response:

Yeah, Cassie won't have much luck when Alvin is at home, not unless she plans on Alvin moving in with her.

 

 Trust me, vgiv and I worked this one out, there is a very important reason why Cassie made that announcement in front of the whole school, it'll be revealed later on what its for. Hold on to it for a while, it'll be important.