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Reviewer: frankstergirl Signed starstar [Report This]
Date: July 16 2014 10:14 PM Title: Chapter VIII: Escape the Prison to have a Volcanic Showdown

It's a good story idea but I really do think you need to put a bit more thought In to the details of it. I understand you wrote it on your phone which is pretty impressive knowing how hard it can be to type anything longer then a few sentences lol. Just think you need to try set the scene more explane the characters a bit more ect.

I also saw loads of Spelling mistakes there nothing drastic so it's not to bad but I would recommend proof reading it just to make sure before posting :). But other then that it was a pretty fun story.

-frankie x

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