Date: September 02 2022 11:59 PM Title: Mortal Chapter 1 - Worlds Apart
The juxtaposition between the tones of the divine chapter and the mortal chapter were exactly as I hoped for. The sense of playfulness and fun in the earlier chapter perfectly contrasts and compliments the sense of terror and destruction in this one. Of course , using so many perspectives are a must for these kinds of things, as it were done here. But sometimes, (and I do think I’m nitpicking here.) it can feel like a compilation of random bad events when it’s just given in this order so frequently.
Other than that, this seems like it’s heading in a good direction.
[Report This]Date: September 02 2022 11:53 PM Title: Divine Chapter 1 - Who am I?
You don’t usually see these types of stories on this site, so it’s always nice to see someone else’s take on the cosmic size genre. And it was an overall delight to read. You have a great writing prose, littered with a plethora of adjectives and chock full of descriptions. I think they really capture the sense of scale this story is trying to convey. My only worry with these types of stories is that often there isn’t any end goal. But that’s a worry for later. So far, I have to say this chapter was written quite well.
[Report This]Date: September 02 2022 4:36 PM Title: Divine Chapter 1 - Who am I?
Only read the first chapter and I love it already!