Penname: MutantMane [Contact] Real name:
Member Since: February 11 2013
Membership status: Member
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Reviews by MutantMane
D.C by Cartmen Rated: R Round robin half-star [Reviews - 6]
Summary:

So a group of soldiers are on a mission to capture a HVT but things go wrong when they find a cave that leads to a strange new world. Now follow this group of soldiers threw the good times and bad times in this hart warming story of Christmas I’m joking  but it has a lot of action and swearing and bad political jokes so grab the pop corn and beer.

 

Also it’s rated R wait didn’t write that big enough R

 


Categories: Adventure
Characters: None
Growth: Mini GTS (16-30ft)
Shrink: None
Size Roles: None
Warnings: Following story may contain inappropriate material for certain audiences
Series: None
Chapters: 2 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 24936 Read Count: 11667
[Report This] Published: October 30 2011 Updated: November 23 2011
Reviewer: MutantMane Signed
Date: February 26 2013 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

The paragraphs are way too choppy. You end words in the middle and begin them on the next paragraph. Think you can fix that?