Other people's POV in the Shrinkism universe
Although I don't really go for snowballing I still enjoyed this story. I also wonder how things might've gone if he'd chosen Beth instead, or if maybe Abby had decided to fuck him first. Either way, well done.
While I like some of your other stories I found this one to be a bit of a disappointment. I rather enjoyed Tess's taunting of the shrinking guy, along with her plans for him. When she caught him I was looking forward to his anticipation and fear, knowing what was in store for him and that he couldn't do anything about it. Instead she went with anal beads that filled with shit, an ending that I immediatly surmised when she took them out, knowing your styles. A dark and grisly end to be sure, but considering the initial buildup it felt like (to me) a letdown.
The shrinking virus has seized our entire world, destroying families, crashing markets, and throwing our entire way of life into chaos. Some people shrink, and some people don't. This is a short story of a handful of strangers whose lives have been defined by this novel disease.
This is a fantastic story, with descriptive details that bring the story to life. I love it, keep up the great work!
Thanks a ton! I hope you enjoy the rest of what I've written, too!
Another great chapter, keep up the great work!
Thanks, man. Sorry that it's coming so slowly.
I gotta say, I love the way you describe the tiny guy being enveloped and devoured by her pussy! The details of her flesh wrapping around him helps create a wonderful visual that brings the story to life. I can't help but wonder if she'll experience those very same sensations with her friend, who takes her in when she's done shrinking as well. Looking forward to further installments, whatever you have planned.
Explicit visuals in text are an art that I'm still working on. I'm glad you like it, but there's still work to be done.
Natalie Beaumont hates shrinkies. Which is a huge problem for two of her children who have caught the shrinking virus. Life gets extremely difficult and scary for them as they deal with their giant mom. And it only gets more terrifying for them as their only ally, their big sister Aubreigh, is starting to see them differently as well.
Oof. Where to begin. The story isn't bad, but so many of the tinies capitulate way too easily. A little suffering and they cave to Natalie or anyone else. Nobody seems to have a backbone, which is a little diappointing. Andrew went from the verge of tears over being gripped hard and his wife saying he had no voice, to effectively being her subservient pet after a bit of sex. Aubreigh's supposed guilt and remorse so far only seems to extend as far as her own wants. If she truly cared even a tiniest bit, after everything she's seen her mom do, she would switftly agree her tiny siblings and any other captives would be FAR safer and happier in a tiny community. I'm not saying the plot should end with everyone escaping safely, just that the flip flop morality that people keep showing has gotten old and tiresome. I'm interested in seeing where things go, but that ending tagline of "Looks like Natalie has some explaining to do!" leaves me with no doubt that Natalie will blather her way around it and Aubriegh will at best be frustrated but do nothing substantial about it.
Sorry man, I write what I like! And I like spineless tinies and giantesses who wrestle with morality.
A young man at a bar assaulted for his diminutive stature is saved by a good samaritan who holds a dark secret.
I just gotta say, this is a great story so far! I can't wait for further installments. Keep up the great work.
Thank you very much! I hope you enjoy future chapters as well!
A decent chapter and continuation of the story. I like the world building and subtle additions that leave the reader wanting to know more. The chapter title of "Ravenous" is an odd choice. There's no vore elements as one might expect, and aside from the brief mention of Eren's old speck life and their lack of rations nothing in the chapter fits with it. I still look forward to reading more though.
Hey thank you for the feedback! I chose 'Ravenous' in reference to the feast that Eren, Tae and Grace have for Christmas dinner, and also because of the way Xiangling looks at Claire. Every chapter of the story has to begin with the letter R (there is no reason for this other than by coincidence the first few chapters did this and I just went with it lol) and since this was a Christmas dinner focused chapter I went with that.
While the backstory of Jisoo was nice, I think their judgment of Thomas was weak and hippocritical. Alice was a monster, true. However Thomas still tried to protect her out of familial love. He didn't condone her actions, he just still loved his sister and was reunited with her after a long ordeal only to be shrunken and tortured for trying to find a lost loved one. Thomas wasn't a monster, he was just misguided. I think that any amount of research into their lives, something that was almost certainly done would have revealed that aspect about him. To just lump him in the same category as his sister seems like a weak justification to do whatever they wanted. If they were as smart as you've written them to be, and with such a desire to make the world a better place I think they would've made an effort to reform him. Sure, he knew too much to be released, but he wasn't deserving of the torture and murde visited upon him. I like the story, but these last few chapters leave me feeling disappointed.
So as for their justification with Thomas, in the previous chapter it was stated that one of the reasons Jisoo outright killed Thomas was to prevent him from sharing his side of the story, since she wanted to sculpt what Eren thought of her actions. She knew she could manipulate Eren with memories of the trauma from his parents murder, and he would be more receptive since Eren already feels so indebted to her as is. Moreover it is worth noting that the world that Jisoo and Grace want may not necessarily be a place where people like Thomas exist to begin with, both have shown themselves to kill people for even the slightest provocation. To them Thomas is not really a person to be reformed and more of a thing to be used and then discarded, and they will simply use whatever justification they need to do Eren will remain on their side.
As another reviewer noted for this chapter, it could be interpreted that Jisoo either lied or omitted certain parts of the truth. Remember that her entire goal with this conversation was to make sure that Eren remained at her side, so she would be incentivized to paint her actions in a positive light and downplay Thomas’s place as a protector to his sister. If she had simply admitted that she killed Thomas because she felt like it and she enjoys how it makes her feel, Eren’s reaction would have been very different, so she came up with an excuse closer to home he would agree with.
Bear in mind that Jisoo considers herself to be a ‘monster’, as she agreed with Alice when she called her such. She doesn’t really consider herself to be a ‘good person’. To her being a good person means doing what she considers furthering her family’s interpretation as the greater good, not anybody else’s. Furthermore she is a former speck who suffered for years as such, and makes choices based on her emotions before anything else. I’m sorry that you haven’t enjoyed these past few chapters but feel like it’s important to understand the characters motivations and perspective, since it drives their decisions and what they say to each other may lies or half-truths, which a lot of this chapter was.
Ok, so now that a lot more of "the plan" has been laid out I have a few things to say. This story has gone off the rails into the realm of sheer, absurd stupidity. Jisoo and all of her batshit crazy family are a bunch of hypocrites (as has been reiterated upon many times over). They claim they want a perfect world, and will secure their rule by not trying to fix wrongs in the world but to greatly exacerbate them in the hopes that all those that suffer from their actions don't hate them for it. To go from creating specks with the sole reason being making the rest of humanity despise and brutalize them, only to plan to microspeck the rest and have them be at the mercy of normal speck is incredibly stupid in so many ways. For example, the current specks currently survive on the meager handouts of normal people and society. If all of that society and people are turned to microspecks then they all starve. Unless the Amrita corp is somehow able to reach and feed, clothe and otherwise support everyone on the planet the death toll will be in the billions. In which case it might be more humane to just release a bioweapon to kill them instead of messing around with shrinking so they all have to suffer in one way or another. I guess at this point I'm just confused at all the problems they're creating, instead of solving for their "perfect" world, which by all evidence is in reality more of a tyrannical police state built on hatred of each other to avoid hatred of the cause of the architects of it all. I'm a little curious if the Amrita corp has their employees sign in with a sieg-heil before they goose step their way to the office with plans to destroy the human race. I hate to be so critical of a once great storyline but while there may be some mildly interesting drama left to unfold the reasoning and basis for a lot of it grows weaker with every chapter.
The only good thing about this chapter is how Eren seems to have grown a spine and a shred of a conscience. Which while refreshing is starkly in opposition to his behavior and reactions to all of this happening before. He defends Alice and her brother now, but in the moment and after watching their execution all he could muster was a whole bunch of "meh, they were bad I guess." I find his indignation to be justified, however I also find it to be wholly out of character.
Author's Response:
"This story has gone off the rails into the realm of sheer, absurd stupidity."
So I actually really like more critical reviews but I think that's just very mean and not exactly constructive. On to your review itself I do disagree with your analysis for a couple of reasons, but I definitely like discussing about it in a mutually respectful way. I don't think you really understand that the Amrita Corporation or why a lot of characters act how they do. The Amrita Corporation isn't actually trying to make the world a better place. It wants world domination. However they cannot outright come out and say that to all their members and employees, since obviously some people would disagree. Therefore they say that humans are evil, or that it is all for the greater good, or that their family members are gods and have a divine right to rule.
Some characters like Jisoo, Ruiwen, and Grace fall into the category of believing that they are gods are have the right to do whatever they want to humanity since they think they know better than them. And for Jisoo, it's also because she fundamentally hates ordinary people. Jisoo being a hypocrite isn't really a criticism, since that is a part of who she is as a character. She is supposed to be a hypocrite at this point in her development.
Other characters like Xiangling, Lianfei and Lukas on the other hand don't see the Amrita Corporation as doing it all for the greater good, but support it because they as individuals will greatly benefit from it. Lianfei who married into the family will be given lots of power, as would Xiangling who worked for the company then had a relationship with Grace, and Lukas has the opportunity to be one of the humans not shrunken by Operation Deliverance and also gain a lot of power money and influence. This is one reason why lots of Amrita Corporation employees do what they do, because they know if they are victorious they and their families would have a lot to benefit, which in addition to a very careful vetting process explains why they are loyal. Then finally you have Satsuki. She is a character who makes it very clear that she understands what the Amrita Corporation is doing if they claim to be saviors is hypocritical. The entire point of her conversation with Eren in a previous chapter was to make it very clear that the true purpose of the Amrita Corporation is world domination, but she goes through with it anyways without caring about the supposed justifications because she thinks they are a waste of time, since she just wants to be a god-queen and have power.
As for your point about Eren, try to put yourself in his shoes. You are in love with a woman, but now have seen her darker side. Sure she killed some people, but those were two people who he barely knew and one of them tried to kill him and the other defended his would be killer. So he can look past that for the most part. However Maddie is someone who he considers a friend, is his boss, and he has seen her change of heart. Obviously when Maddie is in trouble, it will be much more impactful, and it happens right after Satsuki reveals everything to him so he is especially sensitive to that right there and then. There has been no precedent for him before like this, so I disagree with your assertion that it is 'out of character' for him to have a reaction like that.
Like I said I welcome all criticism but I also really don't appreciate the unnecessary statement at the start, and don't really agree with your points although I do believe everybody is entitled to their views on something. However if you think the story has gone off the rails, trust me it only gets worse from here.
This will be a place to collect some short ideas that I've had. Stories that never develop into longer narratives. Some of them are tied to extant stories, and just didn't fit with the finished product and others are completely unique, as they don't fit in anywhere else. About the only thing they'll share in common is a very short format. Tags will be added and displayed in each story.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Fantastic story. I almost wish she had swallowed him. Great stuff.
After a small team invents re-sizing technology, on member decided to use it to create an underground market for tiny people.
Follow the different stories of her "new product" as they are shipped around the world to be enjoyed by women everywhere.... in many different ways...
Not bad, I rather liked it. Keep up the good work.