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Throughout the sludgy, salt-smelling wastes that rolled unevenly for hundreds of miles around, there was an ecstatic cheering. Months of work had paid off and now a convention of a few dozen men, all deeply entrenched in the macrophile fantasy, were scattered across this alien land. The ritual had not been simple, nor without great sacrifice, but they were here; the promised land of their dreams; each man was less than a dust particle in a bowl of food.

After the dizzying teleportation, they grouped and hugged and celebrated. The feeling of such insignificance, surrounded by a country’s worth of brown-reddish marshland, was greater than they could have imagined. Some had to sit down on nearby stone-like chunks, others simply collapsed in unconscious euphoria. It was too much for them, the glory of it. Soon she would come, the girl that would bring them all to an end, stuffing the vast landscape into the hot cavern of her mouth.

As for exactly what kind of food they were standing on, it was a mystery. Some had hoped for a yoghurt or something similarly sloppy, others vied for the classic hoop cereal. This looked like neither, chunky bog land with mounds of red meat in places, and the thick waft of casserole filled their nostrils. The men’s feet sunk into the wet ground, every footstep a hefty, sloshing plunge, like wading across a water-clogged field. Not the worst way to go, they supposed – as dinner. Unlike breakfast, she wouldn’t be in a rush to have it. They could enjoy themselves for a bit longer.

Distant booms grew louder and shook the boggy ground. Globs of slick mud wobbled as they fell under the gargantuan shade of that woman. They broke out in rejoice and cheered for their demise, even weeping and kissing each other: she was young, with a sharp cute nose and two gorgeous blue eyes, and locks of dirty-blonde hair. She wore this grey shirt that lazily draped over her breast and revealed the tips of her shoulders. Most of these miniscule men had never touched a woman; now they were so close, they could feel the heat of her breath, they could see every pockmark on her cheeks.

Her glazed eyes told them she was somewhere else, lost in thoughts regarding work or something – all the better, they would be consumed without a second thought. Her tiny voyeurs got so hard, some had already came to the sight of her. Those who had not held it in, eager to let loose at just the right moment, on the verge of their sensual annihilation. The ground wobbled like jelly, every man tumbling over with the force of her gripping the bowl and lifting it up. The tips of her fingers and thumb popped out from behind the far-off wall of ceramic. Soon, her lips and tongue would be in touching distance. Her voice echoed so loud and deep, it was almost impossible to tell what she said:

“Molly, dinner!”

Molly? The sudden shock, then a wash of relief, cast over the perverse group of men – this beautiful woman was not to be their destroyer, but at the very least they would be eaten by a girl named Molly. A friend; daughter; partner? They couldn’t tell and hardly cared at this point, they were this deeply entrenched in the reality of the greatest fantasy. They wallowed in their glory just as they wallowed in the slick mud.

“Here y’go!” the woman called out, her cute smile stretching out further than the distance of a million suspension bridges. She lowered the bowl.

To the floor.

Every one of the dozens of men leaped to their feet, insofar as they could with the sticky brown ground clinging to their bodies. A collective breath was felt, deeply filled with the salted stench of the landscape. The woman rose to her full height, towering so high the men could not even crane their necks enough to see her. Their necks were not the only thing that ached; their hearts and groins pounded with agony. Sniffing hysterically, the snout of a gigantic dog rose over the bowl’s rim. Less of a pet, more of a godly entity in its own right, the creature shoveled mountains of slop onto its tongue and down its pitch-black gullet.

If the ground had been rock solid, they still could not have run fast enough; instead, the harder they crawled and writhed, the deeper they sunk. That mysterious woman, their idol of worship, abandoned them to hell, pacing away across unknowable swatches of land in absolutely no time.

They were so close – she was right there – the bitch was right fucking there.

The last thing they felt was the crushing, sloshing, crunching, heat of death – their last scent was the pungent air of dogfood mixed with foul breath – the last thing any of them heard was the squelch of entire continents of food crushed to mere meal, and the bitter screams of the crowd who called out for rescue, for hope, for any death at all but this one.
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