“Can’t we talk like this?” Eli asked. While the question seemed silly — Parker sat on a bed right outside his apartment — it would be the only way for him to maintain any semblance of normal conversation.

Her expression fell. Her face, pretty as ever (was she wearing makeup?), filled the TV screen with a look of rejection. “I haven’t seen you in weeks…”

He cast a side glance at nothing in particular, making every effort to stifle the panic building in his chest. “I suppose it’s ok, but I’ll have to look away. I can’t — ”

All at once, the roof of the apartment lifted, creating a mild vacuum that tousled his hair. He gulped and focused on the beige wall of his livingroom, head pointed downward.

After several seconds, Parker spoke first. “I like your haircut. They must’ve cut it after my last visit.”

At least he didn’t need to worry about his hair anymore. If she liked it, he didn’t care what others thought. “I’m still not sure why they cut it.”

“Ally said it was because you kept getting soap in your eyes during bath time. You’d cry something fierce, even using the baby shampoo.”

“Oh. Great.” Just what he needed — another reminder of his regression.

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about you know. It’s quite normal for premies who shrink as fast as you. When I was here a couple weeks ago, you were like a newborn. A couple feet tall, seven pounds at most, and cute as a button. Of course now that you’ve reached your final size…”

“I know. You’re not interested in me ‘that way’ anymore. You don’t have to say it. I can tell.”

“Actually, I was afraid you wouldn’t be interested in me.”

“That’s impossible.” He blurted without thinking. “You’re beautiful, and smart, and every time I look at you, I wish I was normal so I could…” He trailed off into an awkward silence.

“Go ahead. Finish the sentence.”

“So...I could kiss you.”

“Is that all?” she asked playfully. “We can still kiss you know. And we can do...other things. I’m just relieved you still like me after what I did. I promise it’ll never happen again unless — ”

“Wait. What did you do?”

“Ally didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“She...didn’t tell you.” Parker’s exhale filled the room with warm, cinnamon air. “Ok. Promise you’ll listen and not get upset until I finish.”

“Why would I get upset?” The thought of her enormous presence instilled plenty of anxiety, but he couldn’t imagine himself getting angry at her.

“I kissed someone. A girl.”

“Oh.” Not what he’d expected. But not entirely surprising either. “When?”

“A couple weeks ago, after my last visit. It was a complete accident. We just got to talking...sharing our feelings. About you. But in a good way, no jealousy. And then, before I knew it, we kissed. It was just a little kiss, but someone saw it and rumors started. Ally wasn’t happy. She said you’d never speak to me again. Eli, you have to believe me. I’m so sorry. It was a complete mistake.”

“Who was it?” He already knew the answer. Only one other person at his school would feel similarly. Still, he wanted to hear it.

“Zoey. She still likes you, Eli. And when we talked...it was so strange. I wanted to be angry, but —”

“But you kissed instead.”

“Well, we kissed each other.”

“So I was right. You don’t like me anymore. You came here to say you want to be friends.”

“Eli, will you please turn around? It’s so hard talking to your back about this.”

“The answer is yes. We can be friends. I don’t care anymore. Just leave.”

“Eli,  it’s not like that. Please. Just face me.”

“No!” There it was. The anger he hadn’t expected to feel. “I’m tired and I want to be left alone. Put my roof back and — ”

Long, thick fingers wrapped around his body. His heart leapt but the spike in terror abated nearly as fast as it had arrived. Her digits clamped his arms tight against his body, wrapping everything in a warm cocoon of softness. A tingling calm spread from the base of his skull all the way down to the soles of his feet, nearly the only patch of skin exposed to the cool air above his apartment.

What?! He hovered above his apartment, so high in the air, entrapped in Parker’s grasp — yet he wasn’t afraid. Not in the least. Her massive countenance loomed before him, her straight lined mouth easily twice the length of his torso, yet not an iota of fear.

“Calm down and listen to me. Can you do that?”

He nodded, amazed at how his body reached an even deeper level of tranquility. It was completely the opposite of how he should be feeling. And, while the alien sensations made no sense, they weren’t entirely unwelcome. Not at all.

“Alright, I’m going to set you down. Have a seat and listen. Don’t be afraid.”

She did, placing him gently, right back in his apartment. As soon as her hand released him, he sat on the couch as requested. She hadn’t specified the couch, but it met the requirements. The tingling (a feeling of serenity, of near tangible contentment) rewarded him. And the reward continued as he chose to listen and resist his fear.

“What did you do to me?”

“It’s called binding. You’ll learn about it in your premie training. It’s kind of like hypnosis, but not really. It’ll wear off soon enough.”

“You hypnotized me?” he asked, wondering where his anger had gone.

“Not really. You can resist if you want. You just have to try.”

She was right. He could resist. But it would be like stepping out of a hot tub in the wintertime. He’d be leaving the warmest, coziest, most incredible feeling for...for what? Fear, anger, and discouragement? No thank you.

“I don’t want to resist. It feels good. It’s like...I don’t know. But I’m not afraid.”

She smirked. “You’re probably more susceptible than most due to your prior experience with regression.”

“Will it last? I mean...will my fear stay away?” He could explore the outside world now. With ease! Heck, he could walk outside and run through the grass, likely well over his head in some areas. He could run down the hallway at school, dodging between feet. He could —

“Unfortunately no. It’s temporary. But with practice, your sisters can bind you whenever you want. Some premies like it. Others detest it. They say it’s like mind control, which it isn’t. There’s a lot of debate right now regarding it’s use in Premoria. Regardless, I shouldn’t have done it without asking for your permission, but it was an impulse. Probably another thing you’ll hate me for once it wears off.”

“I’d never hate you.” How could he hate her? She’d given him such a wonderful gift. Even if temporary, the peace in his soul at the moment transcended all wrongs she may have committed.

“I hope so. Because I came here to tell you that I still like you.” She lowered her head so that her chin touched the top of the wall. “A lot.”

“I like you too, but you like Zoey.” So easy to speak the truth in this state. No need to hide anything. Nothing she could say would dishearten him, so why not be honest and...listen. Listening to her was the right thing.

“I do like Zoey. And she likes me. And you too of course. That’s what I wanted to talk with you about. Have you ever heard of polyamory?”

“It’s like polygamy right?”

She laughed, sending a breeze of cinnamon his direction. “Not really. It’s just being in love with more than one person, especially when everyone consents.”

“Zoey’s bisexual?” he asked. It would be news to him.

“She’s not sure, but she likes me. And she still loves you. She wants a relationship with both of us, and so do I. But she said you’d never go for it.”

“So I’d have two girlfriends?”

Parker smiled broadly. “We’ll yes, that’s one way to look at it. If you want. Society teaches us that anything other than monogamy, generally hetersexual monogamy, is wrong. But why are other types of relationships wrong? Why is love wrong? I don’t believe it’s wrong to love, intimately, more than one person at a time. Zoey isn’t sure, but she’s open to explore the possibilities. We just need you to decide.”

“Oh.” He wanted to please her, to say ‘yes’ and kiss her. But was it just the hypnosis thing talking? The binding, or whatever she’d called it? She hadn’t instructed him to agree, so the compulsion to please her in this regard wasn’t strong. She wanted him to make up his own mind. “I need some time to think about it.”

“I figured you would. But, Eli. My preference is still to be with you. If you want to be monogamous, I’d rather be with you than Zoey. I like a lot of things about her, but I’m in love with you. So if you don’t want to try polyamory — if you still want to be my boyfriend — I truly want to be your girlfriend.”

“Ok.” Her words made sense, he admired her honesty, and… he marveled at how even his breathing was. Was he high? He’d never been high before. Maybe it felt like this. It had felt even better a moment earlier when she’d held him. “Um…”

“You want me to pick you up again, don’t you?”

Before she’d even finished her sentence, he was standing, arms at his sides. “Yes, please.”

She smiled and tilted her head slightly. “Ok, but you’re really going to hate me after it wears off. Are you sure?”

“I won’t hate you. I promise.” Just please...one last time.

Her fingers surrounded him again, then enclosed him in a blanket of happiness. Again, not the right word. He didn’t have a word to describe the sensation. Numbness perhaps? No, too negative. It was right, safe, and unifying all at once — her hand a faultless protector, an impenetrable barrier to both physical and emotional harm.

“They say it’s like when a mother carries it’s kittens by the back of the neck.” The light glinted from her shiny lips. “Or like swaddling a baby, tightly restricting it’s movement. It has a calming psychological effect.”

“I do feel calm.”

“I can tell. Unfortunately, I have to be careful speaking to you when holding you like this. You’re more...open to suggestions. After it wears off, remember that piece. You never want to let someone bind you if you don’t trust them. While premies are able to resist and ignore suggestions, it’ll be more difficult for you, at least until you’ve had practice.”

“Ok. I’ll remember.”

She smiled, rolling her eyes. “Of course you will, since I just told you to.” She sighed, drowning him in a cinnamon aphrodisiac. “Oh god, I wish I could just kiss you right now.”

“You can.” He leaned his head forward, chin on the skin of her forefinger.

“Not like this. It wouldn’t be right. Once the binding wears off, once you’ve had time to think about everything, if you still want to be with me, you won’t be able to stop me from kissing you to death.” She giggled.

He smiled broadly. Death by kissing Parker. He couldn’t think of a better way to go.

***

He hated her. No. He hated himself. How could he let himself be hypnotized (or whatever) so easily? Just what he needed — another weakness.

God, his head hurt. Must be what a hangover felt like. He’d taken a nap after Parker left and awoken to a text message from Ally on his television: With Wntr at the pool. txt when ur up.

Of course they were at the pool. It was the first week without school, and Winter loved to swim (not as much as gymnastics, but a close second). They hadn’t even bothered to wake him. Even at his normal size, he wouldn’t have wanted to go, but it wasn’t relevant. They’d gone without asking him, leaving him trapped in his premie apartment like a pet hamster.

Fuck it.

He went to the front door and opened it. Well, he tried to open it, but the knob wouldn’t budge. If there was a lock, it wasn’t visible to him, and if he had any advantage at his current size, it was his eyesight. No lock, no switch, no deadbolt.

After returning to the television, he lifted the heavy remote and typed on it’s rubbery keypad: How do i unlock the front door?

After a moment: Afternoon sleepy head. hang tight. We’ll head home in a minute.

He rolled his eyes and set the remote on the coffee table.

Fine. But how do i open the door?

He waited, but no response.

Ally?!

You can’t. It’s a safety thing. We’ll b home soon.

What the fuck! He really was a pet hamster. All he needed was some litter to shit in and a running wheel to complete to picture.

He stomped back to the door and kicked it. Though it didn’t sound like wood, it did resound with a satisfying thump. He kicked again. And again, until his heel connected with the frame.

Ouch.

He hobbled back into the living room and threw open the curtains, revealing the wall-window. Though large, it too wouldn't open. He couldn’t even find where it would open if possible. That’s when he remembered.

He flew into his bedroom and tugged upward at the base of the window.

Bingo!

Though more stubborn than any window had a right to be, it opened, inundating his bedroom with a draft of cool, fresh air. Invigorating!

He crawled over and through the window sill, letting his bare feet come to rest on the faux wood extending from the base of his apartment. He was free!This simple act of rebellion, as childish as it seemed, did something for his ego. He’d regained control over a part of his life, and it meant he could regain more if he tried.

His gaze wandered to the right — an enormous stuffed animal, the one Winter slept with on most nights. Or at least she’d used to sleep with it. She’d abandoned it along with many of her toys over the last year. What did she call this one? Patches? Whatever the name, it resembled something between a cat and a Winnie the Pooh bear, pink with white polka dots, and black dots, and...really the name Patches described it quite well.

He walked over to it, feet crossing onto the significantly cooler nightstand surface. It loomed over him — his baby sister’s stuffed animal now many times his size. His head would reach it’s bellybutton if it had one, and it was sitting!

It reminded him of two things: his own insignificance and why he didn’t like leaving the apartment even when given the chance. Still, he’d ventured this far. Perhaps he’d prove himself even more capable. He’d surprised himself already, so why not take the next step?

He’d climb the thing!

It seemed perfectly rational. He’d prove he could get around and become taller than the beast in one fell swoop — two birds with one stone. If his sisters returned and found him sitting atop its head...oh they’d be surprised! They’d be upset, but that’s exactly what he wanted. He’d prove he had no intention of being their prisoner, their toy brother who they could lock away in a fancy box.

He began his ascent on the animal’s leg, throwing the front of his body over the cushiony surface and pulling himself on top. Next, the arm. It sloped downward, resting its weight on the leg. He hugged and climbed it as one might climb a wide fireman’s pole. Upon reaching its neck, he rested, catching the sweet scent of strawberries and oil; it smelled like Winter after school, not entirely clean but not outright disgusting, though it had likely been years since she’d washed the thing.

Next came the hardest part. He grasped a handful of fabric. Even though the stuffed creature dwarfed him, it didn’t offer much in the way of loose fabric, so his grip didn’t come easy. Luckily, he found a spot on it’s cheek, an opening between the stitching just large enough to permit the entrance of his fingers.

He leapt and pulled upward, then grabbed the thing’s button eye. It too had seen better days, but it’s slight dangle in it’s socket helped his grip.

He latched his other hand to the eye’s thread and swung his body back and forth until his right hand caught the floppy left ear. Another lucky hole! He moved his left hand to join his right —

And that’s when it happened. Somehow, his movement, the angle of his weight, or something caused the stuffed creature to tilt. In slow motion, it fell onto it’s side and he collided with the nightstand hard enough to knock the air out of his lungs.

Worse, the thing’s head rested on top of his chest, or more accurately, on top of his entire body. He could breathe — he sucked in hair, coughing — but he couldn’t push the animal off. His ribcage ached, as did his tailbone, his back and backside having taken the brunt of the blow.

Worse, than his physical pain, his pride — all the ego he’d built in the last few minutes — toppled to dust in his mind. What if they found him here, like this, trapped helplessly under his sister’s stuffed animal. Could there be a worse humiliation?

Yes. He knew the answer from his experiences over the last couple months. But this particular humiliation he’d brought on himself, no two ways about it. If he could just budge the thing a slight amount —

The front door to the house, the real house (not his fake one), opened and Winter’s voice rang out.

“Eli, we’re home!”