After donning the yellow pajamas (seriously, did everything have to be pajamas?), Eli returned to the outside world. He focused not on the vast landscape of fabric, wood, and wallpaper, but rather on the bowl of soup resting at his doorstep.

Doorstep?

The words he used to describe things no longer seemed appropriate. The doorstep was merely an extension of the interior wood flooring, as if the house’s structure had been glued to it. As for the bowl of soup, it more closely resembled a tall bucket, without a handle of course, because that would be too easy. The spoon looked like a plastic ladle, perhaps a utensil more appropriate for a Barbie, or some other doll that dwarfed him.

Winter probably didn’t have any dolls his size. Probably too easy for kids to lose. Or break.

He bent, latched his fingers under the bottom edge of the bucket, and lifted with his legs.

Nope.

It might as well be a block of concrete. Even if he managed to lift it, he’d certainly spill it before getting —

“Eli.”

The simultaneous whisper and appearance of Winter’s tarp-like dress caused him to stumble backwards, landing on his butt just inside the front door. As the wall of flowery fabric descended to reveal the landscape of her face, his legs kicked, scooting him the remainder of the way indoors.

“Eli, wait,” she whispered, giant fingers closing in far too quickly.

He rose to his knees, grabbed the knob, and slammed the door shut. Unfortunately it lacked a lock of any sort. Not that it would matter. As already proven, if she wanted to reach him, she needed only to remove the entire roof!

“Eli.” A tap on the door. “Come out, please. I know you’re hungry. It’s been hours since I last fed you.”

“Leave me alone.” His voice echoed outside, as if repeated through a loudspeaker.

“Shhh,” Winter said. A series of soft clicks before she spoke again. “I’m not supposed to be in here. Ally doesn’t want me around you today, but I knew you’d need help. I’ll just open the roof for a moment and —  ”

“No!” His voice echoed again, but significantly softer than before. She must’ve reduced the volume of the speakers.

“Why not?” The pitch of her voice increased, even through her whisper. “I promise I won’t touch you. I’ll just move the bowl to your kitchen table.”

“You’re not supposed to be here, so leave,” he said, using her own words against her. “I’m going to turn on the TV.”

“Ok. Ok. I’ll leave. Please don’t tell Ally. I really hope you’ll try the soup though. I cooked it myself. It’s got — “

“Winter.”

“Alright, I’m leaving.” Soft clicks again. “Just call out if you need anything, or turn the TV to channel 3. We’ll hear you.” Feet shuffled against carpet. “I — I — oh I missed you so much! Ok, bye bye.”

The bedroom door closed in the distance, the faint sound of the doorknob turning, the muffled clank of massive gears. His sister meant him no harm, and he’d been somewhat rude. But, he couldn’t handle the anxiety her presence caused, as irrational as it may be. Nor could he explain it. But he could feel it.

After her departure, his nervousness dropped to a far more manageable level. Low enough to venture back outside and taste the soup with the oversized spoon. It wasn’t hot, but it was warm enough. And it didn’t taste particularly bad.

In fact, it tasted quite good — hearty, filling, and somehow meaty in spite of there being no visible meat. The more he ate, the more relaxed he became until a yawn escaped, quickly followed by an unintentional burp.

With heavy lids, he headed back inside, barely making it to the bed. Drained of adrenaline, it didn’t take long for the sleep to arrive. His only means of escape.

***

He didn’t sleep long. Drinking a liter of soup had the effect of a natural alarm clock — the pain in his bladder awakening him far more effectively than his phone ever had.

Groggily, he stumbled into the living room, remembered the living nightmare of his existence, and trudged into the bathroom. He lifted both lids, marveling at how real the toilet appeared. Did the plumbing really work? It had better. He didn’t have many options and he wasn’t about to wear a diaper for the rest of his life.

He peed clear. Not particularly unusual, except that he usually peed yellow, or yellowish. Why was he thinking about the hue of his piss? Carter would have some smartass comment to say about it. The right side of Eli’s mouth smirked upward.

He flushed the toilet, then hesitated. The water didn’t swirl, but dropped downward all at once, instantly replaced by clean water. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting. Perhaps for it to rotate in the opposite direction, as if in Australia.

He reached for the seat, then stopped. No point in lowering it. Not like he’d ever live with a girl again.

A singsong beep emanated from the living room. He arrived to find the television on, the image of an old fashioned telephone, the kind with a rotary thing for numbers, blinking in red.

“Hello,” he said. The telephone picture continued to blink.

He picked up the remote, noting its heft, practically an aerobics dumbbell. After pressing the On button, Ally’s face appeared on the screen. Though she wore an expression of mock annoyance, she appeared normal, not giant as before. Even on the wide screen television, it was as if he were interacting with someone the same size as himself, and thus, his apprehension didn’t return.

“Took you long enough,” she said.

“Good morning to you too.” He walked back to the couch and plopped down, wiping the sleep from his eyes.

“You mean good evening. You slept through the afternoon.”

“Kinda hard to tell time when you’re stuck in a dollhouse.”

Ally rolled her eyes. “You’re not stuck in there and you’re free to come out at any time. Winter went with Mom to pick up a few things at the store, but I’m sure she’d love to see you. We all would.” She paused, studying him. “At least you’re not trembling in fear anymore.”

“Fuck you.” He lifted the remote.

“Wait. I’m sorry.” She sighed. “I just — I’m trying to treat you the same as always, but it was insensitive of me to say.”

“Yeh. It was.”

“Forgive me?” She gave him her own version of puppy-dog eyes. Not nearly as effective as Winter’s, but at least it showed a modicum of remorse.

“Yeh. Fine.”

“It’s going to take time for us to adjust to you, and vice versa. In a way, we’ve had a head start because we’ve taken care of you for the last month. But now that you’re back to being yourself — “

“Wait, a month?” He sat up straight.

“Well yeh.” Her eyes darted to the side, then back. “You don’t remember anything, do you?”

“I remember...falling off Parker’s back and — shit I need to call Parker. Does this TV let me call out?”

“It’s got the standard apps you’d find on a smartphone. But hold off on calling her.”

“Why? She’s my girlfriend. She — ”

“And I’m you’re sister. I may not chase you around like Winter, but I’d still like to talk to you, especially now that you’re back, mentally speaking. Besides, she…”

“She what?”

“Well.” Ally hesitated. “Parker knows you’re ok. We’ve been keeping her informed.”

“Informed of what? What the hell happened to me? Obviously I shrunk. A lot. And ya’ll decided to have a field day with my hair. Thanks by the way. Always wanted to look like Justin Bieber before puberty. Oh and can’t forget the diaper. Great idea that one. Let’s see how much we can humiliate him to get the most views on YouTube.”

“Would you just shut up!” Ally glared at him, her face darkening progressively during his rant. “We haven’t done a single episode since you regressed a month ago.”

“Well — ”

“I’m not finished. Yes, I said you regressed. To an infant, mentally at least.

“Ever think about how hard that’s been on us? Mom’s been worried sick, in spite of the doctor’s assurances. I’m going to summer school because I missed so much class trying to help out the last few weeks. And Winter, the sister you love to ignore, has spent every waking moment thinking of ways to help you by cooking, cleaning, and everything else imaginable. In spite of what you think, we’re not evil. We’re your family, we love you, and we’re trying as hard as we can.”

The knot in his chest rose to his throat and he blinked away water in his eyes. “I — I didn’t know…”

“No you didn’t. It’s why I’m telling you now, as calmly as I can, instead of hanging up on you.” He rarely saw her cry, but he could see hints of moisture in her eyes.

“Hey. Um. I’m sorry. Can we just start over?” he asked.

She let out a deep sigh, wiping her eyes. After a moment, she said, “Yeh.”

“I guess...thank you. I didn’t realize you flunked school — “

“No, I passed, just with the caveat I’d attend a summer school class. Faculty were very understanding. Tons of kids at school signed a get well card for you by the way.”

“Wow. Um... What what about me? Did I pass?”

“There’s good news and there’s bad news. Which do you want first?”

“The bad news.”

“Always the pessimist.” She smirked, then straightened her face. “So it looks like you’ll be repeating the eighth grade. Apparently your grades sucked even before the regression.”

“And the good news?”

She blinked. “I’m a bit surprised you handled that so well.”

He shrugged. “There are worse things.”

“Well, the good news is that I’ll get to be your watcher...if you want. We’ll be in the same classes. It’s up to you though. You’ll probably have your pick of girls…”

He’d be in the same grade as Parker. He’d of course choose her as his watcher, but he didn’t want to disappoint Ally at the moment. “Thanks, I’ll think about it. I doubt there will be that many girls, or guys for that matter, who’d want to watch me.”

“You’d be surprised how many Nirvana fans...um, oh yeh. More bad news.” She took a deep breath and spoke fast. “Carter put your Nirvana cover on the internet, even though I told him not to. It got thousands of views and you even got invited to Ellen, but of course you couldn’t go. Now you have a few hardcore fans at school, not to mention around the world. And I know you’re really pissed, but it totally wasn’t my fault!”

He sat there in stunned silence. He should be pissed. That asshole. But, somehow, the trickle of anger he felt paled in comparison to the tempest of emotion he’d experienced so far. In fact, something she said piqued his interest. “Thousands of views?”

She gave a nervous smile. “Well yeh, like seven hundred thousand. Your fund has earned over fifteen hundred dollars from advertisements and donations.”

“What did people say about the music? Did they like it?”

“Heck yeh. But we’ve been telling you that for years. You just never believed us.”

He rubbed his temples. “It’s a lot to think about.” Eager to change the subject, he asked, “By the way, where’s the trash can in this place?”

“Just leave it on your front doorstep. Oh, and don’t use the toilet. It’s fake. If you flush it, it spills onto the carpet.”

“Wait, what!” He stood up, tempted to go to the bathroom, though unsure of what he’d do upon arriving.

“Got ya.” Ally smiled.

“What the fuck, Ally.” Then, he smiled too. “You asshole. I’d just used the bathroom too.”

“I know. I could hear it. It’s how I knew you were awake. Might want to turn down the microphone in the bathroom.”

“Uhh...I’ll turn off all the microphones, as soon as I figure out how.”

“You can’t. Only the one in the bathroom. I’ve locked the others. And before you complain, think it through. Remember we’ve been through the premie training sessions and you haven’t. We’re not evil sisters attempting to control your life.”

“I — I wasn’t going to say that.” But he was thinking it.

“No, but you were thinking it.”

“Maybe.”

“Anyway,” she said. “Want to come out here and wait until Mom and Winter get home?”

“No.”

She shook her head. “Ok, but you can’t stay in there forever ya know.”

“Why not?” Legitimate question. Seemed like the apartment had everything he needed, so long as they brought him food.

“Eli, I thought we’d agreed to start over. No more evil sister assumption.”

“Yeh, well it has nothing to do with that.” How could he make her see… “When you guys lifted the roof earlier and reached for me, I felt like I was going to die or faint or something. Obviously you don’t want to hurt me, but my body just reacts. It’s fucking terrifying. I know you think I’m a coward.”

She looked away for a moment, chewed on her lip, then back at him. “No, it makes sense. The training sessions and the doctor warned us. They said it’s an irrational fear, like a fear of heights, but worse. It’s something you don’t have control over. It’s...hard for us to imagine how we look to you.”

She raised an instructional finger. “The good news is that if you work at it every day, you’ll get better, just like someone facing their fear of heights.”

“I don’t know,” he said. “I’m also afraid of heights and that’s never gone away. Just promise me you’ll never grab me or take off the roof without my permission.”

“Eli, I can’t promise that. We’re responsible for you. But unless it’s an emergency, I’ll try to avoid it if you promise to make an effort to face your fears a little more each day. If you stay isolated, you’ll get depressed, and so will we, especially Winter.”

“I’ll do what I can, but — “

The front door of the house opened and footsteps stomping up the stairs could be heard through the phone. “Is he awake? Is he awake? Let me see.” Winter’s face filled the screen. “Hi, Eli! When did you wake up? Was the soup good? You figured out how to use the phone. I wanted to be here for that. We got you some premie utensils. They’re so cute — wait till you see them. Actually, I’ll just come show them to you.”

“Winter.” Ally’s voice chimed in. “Remember the rules for today.”

“Awww.” The picture jolted around, showing ceiling and part of the couch. “Mom, can I go see Eli?”

“You have to ask him, honey.” His mom’s face appeared. “Hey sweetie. I’m so glad you’re back to normal. I know this is all really tough for you right now, but we love you so much. And we’ve missed you.”

“I missed you guys too. I just, I’m not…”

“I know, you’re not ready yet. We can wait. And I have an idea for a way we might be able to enjoy dinner together tomorrow. It’s entirely up to you though. Honestly, I want to see you as bad as Winter, but you’re in control here sweetie. We’ll go as fast or as slow as you want.”

“Thanks. I love you, Mom.”

***

Eli stared at the ceiling as he lay in his bed, replaying the conversation in his head. Parker had been happy to receive his call, overjoyed even, but she couldn’t talk for long and promised to come see him tomorrow. Though nervous about ‘seeing’ anyone, including Parker, something else bothered him. She hadn’t looked him in the eyes, or if she had, it hadn’t been for long.

She liked premies. She’d said so herself and he believed her. Was it his hair? Did she find him unattractive now? Maybe his regression over the last month had turned her off. God, he had such a hard time with girls before shrinking. Now it seemed he’d be destined for rejection no matter what.

Maybe it was for the best. What would they actually do together anyway? And long term…she couldn’t possibly want a future with someone entirely dependent on her for everything.

The door to the bathroom, the normal-sized one, closed and the light behind his curtains dimmed. Then, the springs of the human mattress squeaked, covers shifting.

“Goodnight, Eli,” Winter whispered.

He didn’t respond. Ally was right. He did ignore Winter, but in his defense, he didn’t have a choice. If allowed, the girl would cling to him like Saran wrap, suffocating him with unwanted attention and affection.

“Eli, are you asleep?” she asked.

Still, it made him feel bad. Just a bit. How could he expect Parker or anyone to like him if he was an asshole?

“Ok,” she said after several seconds. “Night. Love you.”

Aaaaaaaahhhh fuck it.

“Night...and thanks for the soup today,” he said. Hopefully it would be too quiet for her to hear, but loud enough to assuage his guilt.

“Ohmigosh, you’re still awake.” Her bed springs squeaked. “Did you like the new utensils? I promise you won’t have to eat soup every day, but the doctor said to ease you back into a solid diet...or something like that. I’ve already got your breakfast planned for tomorrow. It’s a surprise. You’re going to love it.”

“That’s cool. And yeh, the utensils were the right size. You don’t have to worry about breakfast. I’ve got plenty of leftovers.”

“No way. You’re not eating leftovers for breakfast, silly. Besides, I like making it. I feel like we’re playing house, except it’s real, and you’re really my brother. And before you say it, I know we’re not playing house. I’m too old for that. But it’s still fun to...help. Does that make sense?”

He sighed. “Yeh, I guess. You don’t have to make such huge portions though.”

“Well I make enough for everyone, and just add the powder to yours. Trust me”—she giggled—“to me it’s a very tiny portion. Like a teaspoon or less.”

Just what he needed. Another reminder of his insignificance. She didn’t mean to, but she had no  filter on her brain. Thoughts poured out, raw and honest.

Yet, maybe it was better. Others surely thought the same things, but didn’t say them aloud. He kinda wished Parker had a bit of Winter’s honesty during their conversation today, even though he might not have liked her words.

“Hey Eli. I know It’s not the next day yet, but can I give you a hug goodnight?”

“Uh, no. And not tomorrow either. I appreciate your cooking and everything, but I can’t do that.”

“But...but Ally said I could touch you again tomorrow.”

“It’s not her choice, Winter. It’s mine. I’m not ready.”

She mewled softly. “When are you going to be ready?”

“I don’t know. But don’t get your hopes up.” He rubbed his temples. “I really need to get some sleep. Goodnight.”

The clock in his head ticked the seconds away. The longer it ticked, the less likely Winter would —

“Eli, do you not like me anymore?” her voice, slightly choked, broke the silence.

He sighed, loudly this time. “I still like you. Now please, can we go to sleep?”

“When I said love you, you never said it back. You hate me now, don’t you? Is it because I bother you? Even though I let you sleep all day today and...and I’ve been trying so hard to leave you alone.”

If she started crying now, something she hadn’t done much recently, he’d never get to sleep. “Of course I love you. You’re my little sister...even though you’re kinda huge to me now. Listen, I told this to Ally...but it’s not your fault. It’s like”—he considered for a moment—“name something you’re afraid of. I mean really afraid of.”

“Spiders?” she said.

“Ok. Imagine a huge spider, fangs dripping with poison, hairy legs crawling up your bed sheets. It’s inching toward your face as you sleep — “

“Stop, you’re scaring me.”

“Exactly. It’s not real. The spider can’t hurt you. Even if there was a real spider, chances are it would never bite you or do any damage even if it did. It’s an irrational fear. Your body reacts. Kinda like being afraid of heights. You can’t stop it. Now imagine that feeling, but ten times worse. That’s how I feel when I see you so...gigantic. I can’t help it. I know you won’t hurt me, but my adrenaline spikes and I can hardly breathe. I’ll work on it, but it has to be at my own pace. And it may take time.”

“Oh.” She paused for a bit, sniffing, then continued. “They mentioned something about...Gigantiphobia...in our training sessions. I was hoping it wouldn’t affect you.”

“Well, it did. Gigantiphobia. I’m impressed you remembered that.” He’d never heard the word before, but it certainly sounded appropriate.

“I remembered everything.” Her voice sounded closer now. “Hey, I have an idea. How about I just stick my finger in your window. And you can just touch it, and that will count as our hug.”

“Winter. It’s late. And I’m —”

“Pleeeeease. I won’t even move it. If you get too afraid, I’ll stop. I promise.”

“Ahh, ok fine.” She was never going to stop begging him, and he was slightly curious if his body would react the same way with just a finger. “But after this, go to sleep!”

“I promise.” Her whisper came from the roof. “Ok, I’ll open the window and poke my finger in. Here goes.”

The headboard of his bed shook as the window slid open. Something tapped the floor. He rolled out of bed and turned on the light. His breath caught in his lungs at the surreal sight reflected in the mirror. Without even turning around, he wanted to call off the ‘hug’, but resisted. Just barely.

“Can you see it?”

He turned around and faced the monstrous digit head on. Though still on the other side of the bedroom, it loomed like a creature from another planet, nearly as big as his entire body. He forced the fear from his voice.

“You painted it.”

“You noticed! You were sleeping all day and I got bored. Ally let me borrow some of her blue nail polish. She never uses it anymore. I thought mom would get mad, but she didn’t even notice.”

He stepped closer until his feet would no longer propel himself. Still a couple of yards to go.

“Take your time,” Winter said. “I can see you a little through the curtains. You really are afraid. I promise I’ll keep still.”

He hated this fear. It was his little sister, practically the most harmless person on the planet. Well, she wasn’t a vegetarian and she stood up for herself, but at four-foot six, she didn’t inspire fear. Sure, she towered over him now, but she was still the same little girl.

He got an idea and closed his eyes. After a moment, his legs responded and he inched forward, fingertips gliding along the wall. Luckily the room was mostly empty, so he didn’t trip over anything.

After finding the corner, he continued until his fingertips reached the edge of the window and the curtains. A strawberry scent grew more powerful. Going by memory, if he reached just a bit further…

His hand brushed against warm flesh, and lots of it.

“You did it!” Winter said. “I’m so proud of you. Are your eyes closed?”

“Yeh, they are.” He reached again, this time laying his palm flat on the expansive surface of skin. Fine details, pores and hairs, tangible as he explored the tissue. He knelt. On the underside of her finger, he could even feel a faint pulse.

She giggled. “It tickles.”

“Sorry.”

“No, don’t stop. You’re doing so good. Wanna open your eyes?”

He did. One eye, a slow squint, then both wide. His stomach constricted and breathing became labored, but he forced his hand to remain on her second knuckle. After what seemed like a minute of frozen fear, he said, “Looks like you’ve been biting your nails.”

“You can tell? Wow. I only bite when I’m bored at school.”

He let his fingertips explore her fingernail. The polish itself had a dry, grainy consistency. He’d been expecting smooth. A large, red heart adorned the center of the nail, sloppily painted as if with a cotton ball.

“Kinda got outside the lines a bit,” he said.

“What? I did not. Did I? You can probably see a lot better than me because you're so small now. Hey, you can even paint my nails. Wouldn’t that be fun? I bet you could paint some really cool designs and everyone at school would be jealous. I’d have to hold really still, like this”—

Her finger extended straight and he jumped back. It was the speed with which she moved. An object so large shouldn’t be able to accelerate so fast. Watching it happen in real time was like watching a horror flick where the possessed creature at the end of a far hallway suddenly appears right in front of you.

“Ooops. Forgot I wasn’t supposed to move. Are you ok?”

He closed his eyes. “Yeh, but I think I’m done for the night.”

“You did awesome! Here, I’ll close the window.” The window slid and clicked shut. “Now that you’re used to it, we can practice all day tomorrow. Soon I’ll be able to carry you around again, and you’ll actually be able to tell me how fun it is. Imagine Eli, we can pretend you’re flying. You’ll be able to get into places like the movies for free. You can even ride my shoulder once you get comfortable. They have safety gear for it. Aren’t you excited?”

“Thrilled.” He finally managed to turn off the light and get back into his bed.

“Night, Eli. For real this time. I love you so much.”

Sigh. “Love you too. Night.” He said it this time to keep her from brooding. It worked. She finally went to sleep. He knew because of the change in the rhythm of her breaths, as he stayed awake — listening.

And brooding.