Later that afternoon, as more LPA sessions took place, I decided to go for a swim in the hotel pool. When I had turned 14 and my, umm, body started developing in great speed, my mom made me promise to wear bikinis only at the family pool. Anytime I wanted to swim outside, however, I needed to wear a one-piece. I agreed, even as I knew that even one-pieces would attract attention, given my height. Sure enough, as I walked outside to the hotel pool in my blue tanksuit, I could feel the eyes of all the old men (non-convention guests) lounging by the sides of the pool, checking me out. Georgie later told me that in his session all the attendees, young, old, male, female, all at one point gasped in unison as their eyes riveted to the windows showcasing my diving into the pool. What can I say? I kinda stop traffic, or create a tidal wave of attention as I walk by, or dive into a pool… But I was having a great time, I can’t slow down because of what others think of me!
Anyhow, as I walked barefoot back into the hotel, with my towel draped around my shoulders, Eric met me at the elevator bank. “Going up, I presume, pretty lady?” “Why, yes, little man,” I teased him, “I am indeed going up. I would guess you do that too lots of times?” My sexual humor may have gone over his head. All he was doing was staring up at me, my crotch area hovering above his line of vision. I would have liked to stretch my arm and hold his head at arm’s length to indicate his not going up in the elevator with me, but, alas, his head was too much below easy reach of my outstretched arm! I didn’t feel comfortable doing this to him, as I realize how impolite it must seem, but I didn’t want to have to get too nasty later – so I raised my bare foot to his face, and told him, “sorry, Eric cutie, there’s only room for one of us in this car.” And with that, I entered the elevator alone, going back to my room. I don’t know how much longer he had to wait for someone going up the elevator, as I am sure he cannot reach the buttons himself. I hope he doesn’t hold that against me, I do think so highly of the little man, despite his stereotypical male proclivities.
Later that evening I finally ran into (almost literally) my friend Tess. Tiny Tess, as everyone calls her although I find the name so rude, is about a year and a bit older than me but we’ve been friends ever since we met at the annual conference when I was 13. She is now, at 18 years of age, a contender for shortest living female adult, standing in at the adorable height of 26.5 inches, weighing in at 20 pounds even. When we met I was 13 and a respectable 6’1 while she at age 14 had just reached the 24 inches or 2 foot even mark. We were each entranced by the other’s size. Like I’ve mentioned before, I had nothing better to do at these conferences than meet new people and try to avoid being in the presence of my parents as much as possible. So Tess and I hit it off. We followed each other around, whispered in each other’s ears as often as physically possible (my physical flexibility tested each time), and just generally had a grand time. Of course, she had met Georgie, but at 21, G didn’t feel comfortable hanging around or socializing at all with 14 year olds. Tess, for her part, thought the little man, all 17 plus inches, small even to her, was the cutest thing she had ever laid eyes upon. She knew the age gap was an issue and didn’t press the matter. But she also didn’t refuse to eat with us, or spend time with both of us, as often as her own parents would allow. You would’ve thought she and Eric would be a better match, since they were closer in age and height, but somehow I guess their personalities simply didn’t match up.
Now, with Tess finally having graduated high school and becoming an official adult, Georgie couldn’t avoid the fact that Tess, though ten inches taller and more than twice his weight, was the prettiest girl he knew who was so deeply, adorably, heartbreakingly interested in him.
So that evening when I rounded a corner into a side room, and Tess, not knowing, rounded it in the opposite direction directly in line with my knees, she basically bounced backwards and landed on her head. I gasped and lowered immediately to my knees to pick her up, like one might an injured bird, and kissed her cheek until her eyes fluttered open, saw me and smiled, while I said, “oh, Tess, baby, I am so sorry! Are you hurt? I’ve looked forward to seeing you all year, but not in this way! Oh my God, I am soo sorry! Please, please forgive me!” She assured me nothing was hurt so I lowered her to the floor, and still on my own knees, looked down at her, and hugged her. “So good to see you, girl! I really have to watch my knees more when I’m around little people!” She laughed and asked me where Georgie was so she could talk to him, so I walked with her to the main lounge where I knew I’d find him.
As soon as I saw him, I rushed over, and picked him up, telling him I wanted him to see someone. I knew my body covered his view of Tess from behind. I walked him over to Tess, and then sat down at a nearby chair, looking down as a beautiful love story, I hoped, unfolded before my eyes.
Ok, ok, so maybe I am over-dramatizing the encounter, I admit, I do that sometimes. But still, you have to admit, the girl who’s been interested in the guy for like five years finally getting a chance to speak to him, face to face (or face to chest, as the case may be), is as dramatic as they come. Don’t you agree? It was cute to see Georgie looking up, but not nearly as high as he normally needs to, into the eyes of Tess, who had looked forward to this encounter for all these years. I wasn’t close enough to overhear exactly what they said, but I do know that after a few minutes, they walked off together towards the back of the room.
From afar, I almost cried out in emotion when I saw Tess lift Georgie up just a few inches so he could see over the probably 20 inch high wall under the large picture window on the wall. If guys normally do that for girls, it was still moving to see, something I could empathize with, as I’ve done just that for guys as well, given my own height. I adore Tess with all my heart, and I prayed Georgie would grow to feel the same way. Tiny as he is, there must be someone just for him, as I believe there must be someone for everyone. Way of the world, I think. Again, do I dramatize too much? Perhaps, but that’s how I feel. Can’t tell a girl how to feel!
The next morning proved to be an, umm, interesting experience as well. As I’ve mentioned, I often sleep at night without a top on so my, umm, girls can sleep unencumbered. But I also sleep very deeply and it takes me forever to wake up, even if there is an alarm blaring in my face. Well, apparently that morning G had been trying to get me to wake up for a while already, standing way down on his mattress on the floor. But I simply hadn’t heard him. So he climbed up to my bed, and stood over me yelling (in his tiny voice) for me to wake up. At one point, apparently, I had turned over so that my face and boobs faced him, and the slight movement on the mattress caused my little brother to lose his footing and he ended up face down in my right boob! Well, I definitely woke up then, seeing the little guy’s face sunk in my fleshy globe, directly atop my stiffening nipple, his hands sunk in my other boob and my chest on the other side.
He slowly and steadily pulled himself up and out of that, umm, situation, looking really red in the face, and I, leaning on my left elbow, looked over at him and told him, yes, G, that wasn’t uncomfortable at all. My sarcasm screams loud when I’m a bit upset, wouldn’t you say? Hadn’t you seen enough yesterday in our shower? And yes, I was up. Was he fit enough to get off my bed and let me get up on my own? He looked behind him, down at the floor, looking like he was getting ready to jump, so I lifted him up and placed him down there, whispering to him as I let him go, let’s not talk about this again, ok?
Anyhow, yeah, so the next few days passed almost exactly as the first. Naked showers together with my brother, walks outside with Eric, Kim and her dog, time spent with Tess and the pool, sometimes both together (haha), time and coffee or meals spent with many other old and some new friends at the hotel. Finally, the last night of the conference, the famous banquet. The food, as Georgie already told you, is amazing! There is a dance there too, which is great for the LPs, probably not so great for non-LPs who don’t have a date. Like moi, for example. I danced with this one non-LP, kinda tall but he was a biker dude, which is really not my thing. I also danced with Jeremy, who G already described. It’s kinda funny, now looking back, how G is less than 1’6, Eric is 2’6 and Jeremy is about 3’6. It’s almost like all the really short men in my life are a foot apart! (Ok, James, at barely 5’2, kinda breaks that mold…but not by much!) But Jeremy is kinda cool, with that real suave Travolta look. I danced with him, playfully hugging him in close to my waist, trying not to let him think I thought of him too much.
My favorite moment of the dance, however, was when the music played something soft and light, the lights went dim, and I scanned the room from “above” all the heads of the LPs below my waist, spotting G and Tess together. Such a tiny couple, but so right together in my eyes, my heart kinda went pitter-patter. I just wanted to scoop them up together in my arm, and see them cuddle. Instead, I just rushed over to them, standing way above them, and said, “my God, you guys, this is so cute! Can I do a selfie with you guys?” They kinda nodded yes, and then wondered aloud how I’d ever manage to bend down low enough. I just lay down on the floor near them, held myself up with one elbow so my head appeared near-level with Tess’s, G standing in front of Tess, and shot the three of us together. It was a great shot, and I shall treasure it for a long time to come.
Leaving the conference is always the hardest part. Most of the LPs won’t see each other for a whole year and that’s a long time to live apart from people just like you. I know I always appreciate when I get to hang with other tall people, and I feel sad when we part. That doesn’t happen to me a lot but I am glad when it does. I cannot wait til I am old enough to attend the Tall People’s club annual convention! Maybe I will bring G along just so he can keep me company and kind of feel what I’ve felt all these years attending the LPA one. Anyhow, we kissed and hugged goodbye to all our friends, LP and non- alike, and promised we’d stay in touch throughout the year. And so ended another year at LPA.