Chapter Ten: Death of my brother

            It was morning before the closet door swung open. Al didn’t even pay me any attention as she sifted through her closet pulling out some sweatpants and t-shirt which I couldn’t really see

I was ready to be resealed in the darkness of my younger sisters closet when her head turned towards me. Her eyes stared at me as I looked helplessly back at her.

            “Al! its me Jacen” I said as she continued to look at me. I watched her hand slowly move towards me. It was wavering up and down as she pushed her index finger against me. I winced in pain as the hat swung back and forth from my sister’s slightest touch.

            “You’re warm” she said as she continued to look at me. I could practically see the thought process working running through her head, struggling to rationalize this.

            “It’s really you, isn’t it?” she sadly said as she looked at me. I hadn’t ever seen my sister look at me like that as she moved her finger across my body.

            “I, I can’t believe all of this. You are so small, what happened? How did this happen.”

            I started to try to tell her but she shook her head and told me that it was hard to hear me. She then moved her head closer to me. I wanted to step backwards but I couldn’t really move well stuck inside her hat.

            “Now speak” Al’s said as her voice rumbled through me. I was terrified to see her this huge, and this close. All I could see was her face, her hair was thick enough to be ropes. It was amazing to see something so big up this close.

            “SPEAK” she said again in a commanding tone. My nose crinkled as her morning breath washed over me. I stammered a little bit and then started telling her the whole thing. I wanted to stop half through but I found myself unable to stop telling her. I found myself still afraid her. Afraid of my little sister.

            When I was done I expected her to be crying or something but she almost had a smile on her face. I was a bit taken aback as she reached into the hat. I shook visibly as her warm hand wrapped around me.

            “You feel so cold, don’t worry. Your little sister will take care of you.” My entire body froze at those words. My little sister will take care of me. She said it like I was some kind of baby, like I couldn’t fend for myself.

            “I don’t need you to take care of me” I snapped back as loudly as I could. Al didn’t even respond. I don’t think she heard me as I felt her move forward. I rocked from side to side in her hand as she took me somewhere. I yelled where are we going but I once again didn’t get a response.

            I felt so small as she clutched me like this. Everywhere I looked I could see only darkness and the outlying shapes of her fingers. The heat radiating around me was incredible. I wanted desperately to say something, but I knew she couldn’t hear me so it was useless to even try.

            Light spilled into her hand as she opened her fist and I saw her moving towards the kitchen. This was the first time I had been out of Al’s room since this ordeal began. I could see my mom in the distance reading the paper. It was a unreal sight. Everything around me was just so big, tables, chairs, counters, appliances, it was a incredible thing to witness, but it  really put everything into perspective for me.

            “Mom, umm I have something to tell you.” Al said.

            My heart was racing as I saw mom lower the paper I saw her giant bloodshot eyes, they were red and puffy. She was almost visibly shaking as she set the paper down and looked at Alyson.

            “Honey, I have something I need to tell you too. Its”

            “This is super important mom hold on.”

            “Alyson please, don’t make this harder then it is.” Mom cut her off and stood up using the table for support and started waking towards Alyson. I felt her fingers close back around me as she neared. It felt like she was squeezing the life out of me.

            “Honey, I got call late last night from the police department. Its Jacen, I’m so sorry honey. Its just, he is, they found him. Its just he is, he is”

            “He is what” said Alyson as she held me tighter then ever. I could hear her near tears as she spoke to my mom.

            “He’s gone honey.” Alyson’s grip on me loosened causing me to grab tightly onto her fingers. I saw my mom getting farther and farther away. I didn’t understand what was going on until I realized it was Alyson moving backwards.

            “Alyson” mom shouted as everything blurred like I hadn’t ever seen it before, the world racing by as the air blew against me like a mighty wind. I could hear my sisters muscle working as she raced up the stairs, her feet pounded against the wood sent shockwaves down my spine. All slammed her door shut and fell onto her bed clutching me tightly as she sobbed into her pillow.