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Story Notes:

I gave the story an X Rating just to be safe. Who knows where my sick mind will take Ridge?

Author's Chapter Notes:

Introduction chapter! If you like my writing style, Then I'll add on after the second chapter I've already planned.

 

"Ridge Poler: Professional Dork" was the sign hung above the apartment of said professional dork, whose job entailment was to fix classmate's computers. To those of you wondering how he has an apartment and is in high school, assuming you read the description, I ask you to suspend your disbelief on such a fantasy website.

Anywho, Ridge was having a normal day on his computer, when a strange mistress knocked on his door. Ridge answered to it with the best possible greeting he had as an introvert. "Who is it!?"

"Agent Sarah Paeling, ETF."

"ETF? I knew I shouldn't have downloaded black market porn!" Ridge thought to himself. "What do you need?" he said out loud.

"Our computer at our headquarters a few blocks away is jammed. We heard you can fix computers."

This was an interesting offer, and Ridge was in no position to back down from an adult, a lady, and a government agency. He opened the door, and action hero like, he asked, "Mac or PC?" This would have been decent if he had remembered to wear his pants.

After getting over that mishap, Agent Paeling lead Poler to the ETF Headquarters in Ipipenurrae, Kentucky. There were more then enough gadgets to woo any geek over for life, but almost just as many Ridge couldn't ask about. He was brought to a very big computer, labeled B.D.B.H.A.I. Despite Ridge being told to fix it, he wasn't told what purpose it served.

Luckily, since none of the computer experts were there that day, (Probably because of Rosh Hashana) they didn't realize Ridge could look into the coding, which he deciphered through intellect to be in use for another machine that could probably turn humans to insects and vice versa. Through intellect he also deciphered B.D.B.H.A.I. stood for "Boundary Disentigrater Between Human and Insect", that was just a best guess, but the other facts he found out he could prove.

There was a big mistake he made in fixing the computer though. He knocked over a glass of water, which caused a nearby mouse to scurry into a mouse trap, which caused a single paper to fly on a button that launched a catapult all the way to Saskatchewan. Being up for a little friendly competition, the scientists at ETF Saskatchewan sent over a giant tennis ball, which missed and hit a bill board, causing an old lady to have a heart attack out of shock, and the lead scientist of ETF to run to help her, knocking the B. D. B. H. A. I. R. (ray) to the direction of Ridge, and firing.

"What a coincidence!" Ridge said as he went flying through the air due to the knocking back of the shot. As knocking back of shots would do, this made Ridge unconcious.

Then, when Ridge woke up. He was being looked at by Agent Paeling and some other ETF agents he saw earlier, gawking at him. He go up and saw the agents didn't get shorter lik they should have. He looked at his body and saw he became a horrifying beast of nature. A ladybird. After gawking at himself for a bit, he decided to test out flight, which seemed to be of nature to him, as he flew around the agents, scaring a few of them. The gig was up when Paeling decided to grab Ridge, which Ridge was saddened by. This sudden burst of inexcitement made him grow astoundingly, out of Paeling's palm, losing two legs, wings, and prior color as a ladybird. He was a man again.

"So that's how it feels to be a ladybird!" Ridge said.

"That ray was a test! Now we know it works! We could use this for such great things!" Paeling got over exasperated by. What she didn't realize was that because Ridge was in the middle of fixing the computer, he opened it up to a virus, which disabled the ray and computer, with their only course of action being to build another one on a near broke budget.

By the time they realized this, Ridge was long gone, finding he could be four insects and an arachnid. He had the choice of worker ant, ladybird, housefly, mosquito, and daddy long legs.

That's what he would do in his free time.

On an average gym day, he would fly into the girl's locker room, undetected, and play a game called:

WHO GETS THE SOAP?

The way the game works is he becomes an ant, and climbs on the bar of soap, and waits to see who grabs it. If the person who grabs it harms him more than satisfies him, he waits for them to wash their crotch, and become a daddy long legs, usually scaring the poor girl half to death. When the girls see what's happening, Ridge become a fly and flies off. Paeling didn't like this game to say the least.

One day, after a hilarious game of "WHO GETS THE SOAP?", he took a sit down on a bench. He was loving his position. He was top man from now on. A killer job, and a killer hobby. Nothing could make his life better. While gloating to himself, Meredith, the last victim of Ridge's game, a poor unsuspecting girl, already teased for her size and dietary habits. It was a rough day and she would usually sob to herself on the showers bench, before getting changed and going out. This time, she was surprised. When she sat down, she felt something crawling around in her rear. Trying not to make a fuss, she scratched inside, trying to get it out, but it was stuck. She had no choice but to change and move on before top cheerleader, Joy Perm, came in and picked on her for Meredith picking in herself.

But Joy was the first one aside from Meredith to know something was in there. While playing soccer, Joy and Meredith were on the same team. They were trying to get the ball, when the current beholder of said ball pushed Joy down, tripping Meredith to unpleasantly fall posteriorly on Joy's face. While on there, she heard a scream for help right under Meredith, for just a second, before Meredith got up again.

Safe to say Ridge was not in a pleasant place, as it stunk to the point of almost blinding his nose, and he had no choice but to scream for help, as any insect he turned into would still be stuck. The worst part was when Meredith fell again, this time not on Joy, and let out some gas from last night's dinner. This foul smell left Ridge no choice but to grow back to normal size, ripping out of Meredith's shorts.

Boy, it’s a sure good thing he got out of there in time. What could Ridge have said to get out of that pickle?

 

 

Chapter End Notes:

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