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I think it's been almost twenty-four hours. I spent the night here, hanging in the darkness and sobbing quietly, listening to Naomi's snores. I've had no food, and the only water has been administered from a sponge that Naomi pressed against the nylon. The water tasted dank and dirty filtered through the hose, but I drank it greedily.

It's unbearably hot in here, and the smell of her clings to the nylon, a hanging miasma of sweat and flesh. The time drags by with excruciating slowness, and I constantly waver back and forth between boredom and despair.

I think of Suzy, although it just about kills me to do so. Jesus, was it only three days ago that I was so happy? God, I absolutely ache for her right now. I want to feel her soft flesh stroking me and gaze into her incredible green eyes... I thought I was out of tears, but I begin weeping bitterly once again.



In about a month and a half, my mom and dad will go to court to determine who gets custody of me. Well, in actuality, it's SPECTRUM and GenetiTech that are fighting over me, but they're using my parents to lend credibility to their cases.

I view the upcoming hearing as a milestone, as the light at the end of my increasingly dark tunnel. At that time, all injustices will be corrected, all wrongs will be righted. I'll be sent back home to SPECTRUM, where I'll once again be safe and happy. And human.

I don't know what the hearing holds for me, but I know with absolute certainty, that I will prevail. Because the alternative is so horrifying that I can't even get my mind around it.

Unless, of course, Nicole comes through for me and gets me to Suzy. As I dangle here in this sheer nylon hell, it's hard to imagine I'll ever be happy again.



Alan Mackey swore he would make things right, and I believe him. I hate the fact that he blames himself for my situation, but I'm truly thankful to have a friend like him. Alan is the head of SPECTRUM security, and he was absent on the day of my birthday party, when Tony snapped that picture and sold it to the Mirror.

He has this scar that runs down his right cheek, and I was always too embarrassed to ask him about it. However, I did ask around and got a variety of stories from a lot of different people. He got it serving in the Gulf War, or helping a bioengineer defect from GenetiTech, or when his car was forced off a bridge by a helicopter... real James Bond stuff.

By far, my favorite story was the one Gary told me. He claimed that Alan was assigned to guard one of SPECTRUM's corporate officers who had been receiving death threats. And one night, while dining with a large group at the Nana Grill in Dallas, Alan spotted an assassin in the corner, dressed as a busboy, with his gun hidden under a towel. With no time to draw his own weapon, Alan grabbed a fork and leapt over the table, tackling the would-be killer and stabbing him in the neck.

The whole story always struck me as a bit implausible, but I still liked it. And I've got to admit that, right now, the image of Alan stabbing Naomi to death with a fork fills me with reckless glee.



God, could I be any lower than I am now? Still squatting in my nylon prison - sore, starved, exhausted, and nearly delirious. I'm soiled with my own waste, and the smell would be enough to make me vomit if I had anything in my stomach. As it is, I can't quit gagging.

Naomi checks on me occasionally to make sure I'm still alive, but continues to ignore my weak, desperate pleas for release. The second night drags by even slower than the first. Naomi stirs in her sleep and lets out a pleasurable moan. I wonder who she's dreaming about? Benny? Paul? Or maybe she's inflicting some kind of cruel torture on me in her dreams.

Her alarm goes off at 6:30. She slaps the clock radio with a groan and sits up, running her fingers through her hair. I watch all this with my face pressed to the foul-smelling nylon, praying that today is the day that she'll let me out.

Naked, she walks over to me and reaches for me. She lifts me up to her face and grins down at me. "Have you learned your lesson?" she asks, her voice rough from sleep.

I nod weakly and whisper, "Yes, Momma."

"Good," she says, unhooking the hose from the door. She pulls at the knot for nearly a minute before she gets it untied. She then lays the pantyhose on the bed, pinches the toe section between her fingers, and slowly lifts it. I slide along the nylon, wincing as the feeling returns to my numb legs. I finally find myself lying on her bed, gasping the fresh air and reveling at the feel of the cool sheet on my face.

She scoops me into her palm and holds me to her face. She wrinkles her nose and says, "You stink! Did you shit yourself?"

I nod, unable to meet her gaze.

"You nasty little thing," she says, carrying me into the bathroom. "Let's get you cleaned up."



We shower together, but this time I'm too broken to offer any resistance. After she lathers me up and rinses me off, she bends down and sets me on her wet foot. I lie there tamely, clinging to her middle toe as the warm water washes down her leg and over me.

After the shower, Naomi dries me off, then sets me on the counter to watch her get ready. When she's completely dressed, she carries me naked into the dining room. Debbie's already here, sitting at the dining room table and smoking. She grins when she sees me huddled in Naomi's palm.

"Hey there, little guy," she says sweetly. "Are we gonna have fun today?"

"Poor thing's exhausted," Naomi says, setting me down at my front door. My legs are so weak I can barely stand. Groggily, I turn and start to go into my house.

"Wait," Naomi says. I turn and regard her foot, staring wearily at her wiggling toes. The pale pink lacquer is dull and chipped away in places. The white leather strap of her sandal runs across the top of her foot, then down into the dark recesses between her toes. If I weren't so tired, I'd shudder.

"Did I say you could leave?" she asks me, tapping her foot impatiently.

I shake my head. "No, Momma."

She sighs. "Come kiss my pretty foot, and then you can go."

"Yes, Momma." I trudge over to her foot and press my lips to her big toe. I step back and look up at her.

"That's a good boy," she says. "You may go, now."

I turn and walk into my house. I close the door behind me, and fall back against it, sighing with relief.

"He shouldn't be any trouble today," Naomi tells Debbie. "But if he gives you any grief about anything, just be creative."

Debbie giggles. "I will."

"If you get a chance to vacuum, I'd appreciate it." I hear her keys jangling as she starts for the front door. "And don't be smoking pot in my house." The front door closes, and Debbie says in a mocking voice, "Don't be smoking pot in my house."

I stand there, my heart pounding, praying she'll let me be. I hear footsteps, the sickening sound of her feet in those Birkenstocks. She stops just outside my house.

I just lie there, exhausted and naked, dreading what is to come. I can feel her nearness, hear her breathing heavily as she drops to her knees to peer through the windows. At last, I hear her giggle. I look up and see her monstrous eye staring at me through the plastic frame of my living room window.

"Do you really want to play on my feet?" she asks, in a voice that indicates she doesn't really think so.

I shake my head. "No, not really."

"Okay, then I'll make a deal with you," she says. "I'm going to go out on the patio for a smoke. You don't rat me out to Naomi, and I won't make you hump my toes. Deal?"

I smile weakly, feeling relief wash over me. "Deal."

"Good boy," she says. I hear her grunt with the exertion of standing up. I listen to her fading footsteps, the slap of her sandals as she crosses the living room. The sliding glass door opens, then shuts. I limp upstairs, basking in the good fortune of my respite.



I finally get a chance to talk to Nicole, who is concerned since she didn't see me all day yesterday. I milk her sympathy for all it's worth, telling her I really need to get out of this house before something bad happens to me.

"Yeah, I got grounded too," Nicole says. "I can't watch TV until Daddy comes home, and that's not until Wednesday."

"You got grounded?" I ask. "Just for playing with me?"

She shrugs. "At first, Momma just said she didn't want me playing with you anymore. But I told her it wasn't fair because I knew that she and Kim's mom and Aunt Debbie were playing with you, so me and Kim should get to too. Then she got all mad and grounded me."

"Well, it won't matter when I'm gone," I tell her. "You can come visit me and play with me all you like, and your mom'll never know."

She nods, grinning slyly. "I can't wait."

"So, you called Suzy?"

She nods. "Yeah, I called her yesterday. We're on for tonight."

"What?" I shake my head, wondering if I misunderstood. "Tonight? Really?"

"Yeah, tonight," Naomi says. "After Momma goes to bed, I'm supposed to take you out front and wait. Suzy's gonna come by and pick you up."

God, I can't believe it. In less than twelve hours, I'll be back with Suzy. I'll be safe and happy... There's only one potential problem, one that continues to nag at me.

"Remember," I tell Nicole. "It's a secret. You can't tell anybody."

Nicole sighs, exasperated with my one-track mind. "I know, okay? I won't tell anybody."



The evening passes at a surreal tempo once Naomi gets home. Debbie's out the door and Nicole's in her room, so Naomi kicks off her shoes and walks over to my dollhouse.

"Come on out, Ray," she says, and I sprint down the stairs and out the front door like a puppy. She towers above me, her bare feet to either side.

"Good boy," she says. "Climb on Momma's foot."

I look to my left and my right. "Which one?"

"You choose," she says. I go left for no particular reason and scramble over her toes to the top of her foot.

"Okay, sweetie. Hang on," she says, walking with me into the living room. I cling to her second toe, wrapping my arms around it and embracing it like a lover. We get to the couch, and Naomi plops down with a sigh. I hold tightly as she raises her foot into the air and brings it down to rest on the edge of the coffee table.

"Much better," she says, wiggling her toes for my benefit. "Now get to rubbing." As I do so, she launches into a tirade about her horrible day, including all the stares and questions from strangers who had read the Mirror article.

And so it goes until dinner time. Condescending playfulness, casual menace - I endure it all with good humor because I know that it'll all be over by ten o' clock tonight.

After a nauseating dinner of mashed up Hamburger Helper and a piece of green bean, Naomi keeps me underfoot while she does the dishes. She toys with me relentlessly, pinning me beneath her sole and grasping at me with her toes.

"You like that?" she asks, smirking down at me. I respond by kissing her toe and looking up with the biggest shit-eating grin I can muster. It's all quite stomach turning, made palatable only by the light at the end of the tunnel.

"Momma's gonna take you work with her tomorrow," she says, touching her big toe to my face. "Linda's gonna do my nails during lunch tomorrow, and I figured you'd wanna be there for that."

"Sounds great," I exclaim enthusiastically.



At half-past-nine, Naomi finally plucks me from her toes and announces that it's bed time. I can hardly contain my excitement as she carries me back to my dollhouse and starts to set me down. Then she hesitates as a smile creeps across her face.

"You wanna sleep with Momma tonight?" she asks, and I suddenly see my best-laid plans going out the window.

Struggling to keep my composure, I look up into her face. "I would really love to, but can we please make it tomorrow night?"

Her smile fades slightly. "How come?"

I shrug. "It's just, I didn't sleep real well the last two nights, and every time I tried to take a nap today, your sister wanted to play with me."

"Poor baby," she says, stroking me with a pink fingernail. "You're exhausted, aren't you?"

I nod. "I just need a good night's sleep. But tomorrow night, I promise I'll rub your pretty feet until you fall asleep."

Naomi actually smiles shyly at this. "Okay, sweetie. Momma'll let you get some sleep then." She sets me on the floor, at my front door.

"Good night, Ray," she says in a syrupy voice. I walk over to her foot and plant one, final affectionate kiss on her big toe.

"Good night, Momma." I watch her walk away, my grin slowly transforming into a grimace as she heads down the hall. Thank God I'm on my way out of here, because I can't even bear the thought of enduring the day she has planned for me tomorrow.



At a little after ten, Nicole comes sneaking into the dining room with a small scrap of paper and a broken piece of pencil lead. I carry the two implements into my dollhouse and write my note:

"I can't live like this any longer. I'm tired of living like an animal, something for Naomi to pet and play with until Paul finally gets around to bartering me off to GenetiTech. You uprooted me from the only home I've ever known, and I'll never forgive you for that.

"For that reason, I'm leaving to make my way back to SPECTRUM. The way will be hard, but I'd rather take my chances on the road than spend another minute in this house.

"I hope you rot in hell, you bastards."

I read it over and, satisfied that it conveys just the right touch of melodrama, I sign my name to it. The print will be excruciatingly small for them to read, but screw 'em.

I grab a couple of changes of clothes, roll them up into a tight bundle, and carry them downstairs and out the front door. Nicole is kneeling outside my house, waiting for me. She reaches down and scoops me up into her palm. I grin up at her, and she grins back.

She carries me out the front door, closing it quietly behind her. My heart is pounding as I look out at the dark, empty street. Any minute now, I'll see the headlights of Suzy's car as she comes to...

"Uh, where are we going?" I ask Nicole as she carries me across the lawn. She offers me a smile but says nothing, and I suddenly realize that I've been betrayed.

"God damn it!" I scream. Nicole closes her fist around me, muffling my screams. My arms are pinned helplessly to my sides, but my legs flay angrily as they protrude from the bottom of her fist.

"Be still," she warns me as she carries me next door. To Cheryl and Kim's house.



"You fucking lying evil goddamned vicious stupid..." I rant from the floor of Kim's room. Kim and Nicole stand to either side of me, looking down and grinning at my tirade.

"He's so mad," Kim giggles, prodding at me with her socked foot.

Nicole sighs and shakes her head. "Come on, Ray," she says yet again, explaining the situation to me as if I were an idiot child. "It really is better this way. We still don't have to move to Midland, plus now I can come over and play with you whenever I want."

"Fuck you!" I scream at her, growing angrier by the minute.

Kim gooses me with her foot again, knocking me to my knees. "Maybe he needs one of my pills," she says. "That might calm him down."

Nicole kneels down and grabs me. She holds me, kicking and screaming, to her face. "I have to go, Ray," she tells me, still talking to me like I'm a child. "If Momma catches me out sneaking around, she'll ground me for another week."

I just glare at her, wishing I could ignite her hair with sheer will alone.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she says, pressing me to her monstrous lips and kissing me with an obnoxious, smacking sound. I angrily wipe her saliva from my face as she sets me back down in the floor. "You be good for Kim," she tells me as she leaves, closing the bedroom door behind her.

I stare at the massive door, still unable to get my head around the sheer act of betrayal I've suffered at Nicole's hands. How could she do this to me? How could she lie to me? And how could she leave me alone, at Kim's mercy?

As if reading my mind, Kim mutters, "Well, well, well..." I turn around and see her sitting on the edge of her bed, pulling off her sock. She lets it fall to the ground, then brings her bare foot down next to it.

"Guess what we're going to do now," she says with a playful wiggle of her toes.

Oh, God. I am so screwed.
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