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Author's Chapter Notes:
Yes, she is simply unable not to kill somebody.

As for the tremendously long chapter – I know, but.. it seems like a continuous series of events that also makes sense to be read together, so I refrained from splitting it into smaller chapters.

One detail – for anyone unfamiliar with a construct like this:
”Speech speech
”Blah blah
”Even more words.. and done.”
means that a single person is continuously speaking. I need to break things like that into paragraphs and couldn't find enough excuses to interrupt some monologues.






At least the micromatter storage is simple enough to use – Kate is able to gather the program the requested materials quickly, it's so much simpler than feeding the micro-assembler. Everything else is.. simply beyond her. She was already worried that she may have told Amber too much – and even worse with the people. But once she heard Rachel...

Waiting for the machine to drop the products in an empty zone, Kate thinks if she understood the mother correctly. There is no other way to interpret her words – how she mentioned that she was just fine.. speaking exactly how she did shortly after the school ended. Nothing meaningful happened, just one day she sent the seconds a mesg that she taught them enough and they won't be meeting anymore. Kate still felt there was so much to learn, but others actually welcomed it – Amber and Nicole were only attending it because Erica has asked them to. And Rachel wouldn't tell anything more... even when she finally agreed to meet her face to face, about a week later.

Kate can still remember the sight – black eye, a band of material on the left arm that she only later learned to be “a bandage”... Even when the firsts fought a couple years earlier, they seemed less hurt and medbeds fixed them up quickly, so only April showed any signs of what happened – something like a scratch here and there, but nothing like Rachel! And the scene of their fight looked terrible – they attacked each other in the cafeteria and there were blood, broken chairs, torn pieces of the uniforms... Courtney had to clean it all up, since she was less hurt.

Rachel looked much worse after she ended the school and whatever happened, she must have been really hurt. Yes, the worst part was what she said all those years ago: “we had a little misunderstanding” and “she is just fine now”... the almost exact words she used in the chamber just minutes ago. Was it a coincidence? Perhaps she was simply scared?

She explained how she arrived weeks earlier – shortly after their meeting, she should have get used to... Well, Kate was unsure whether she could ever get used to such perspective – once she saw the view on the screen, her towering over everything... Kate didn't want to scare the people, but she also didn't want to leave them alone. She was afraid something may happen to them – just like she was warned. By Rachel...

And now Rachel is there as well.. Kate thought it was some trick, a hallucination perhaps, but she instantly recognized the voice and it clearly must have been somebody with extensive experience on the facility... even to suggest that she can drop the dress in another zone – why haven't Kate thought about it earlier? It was so obvious.. and instead she exhibiting herself like... Well, others probably didn't care at all about showing their private parts to “their micros”, but Kate knows now and she felt bad undressing like that – just like she didn't like being nude in the presence of other caretakers.

No, it had to be Rachel – there was no other way anyone in the zone would know so much about the assemblers, various materials.. Kate could hear Gary asking about some technical details, but he seemed to be very uncertain with this procedure. If it can help the people inside, she can at least try.

Kate finally notices something shiny pop up in the distance – she was just waiting in an empty chamber, trying to avoid meeting anyone in the assembler control room, where the matter storage controls are also located. Walking towards it, she notices it's actually a bunch of cylindrical containers stacked together – one big and at least two dozen small ones around it.

She doesn't have anything to hold it in, so she crouches down and grabs the big one in her left hand – it feels actually heavy, like two pounds or so – and starts piling the others on the top, resting against her thighs. After collecting everything, she starts programming the teleport and wonders if she should split it into two runs for safety – but eventually concludes it is well secured and jumps to the chamber.

While unloading the containers carefully, she looks for a nearest headphone – she gave four to Amber in the morning and the only two left happen to be on the other side of her spot. It was strange how she never thought about those being so much better than the ones they used earlier – all others were wired and they had to be very careful not to break them. The people in “her chamber” – she feels awkward thinking about it in this way, ever since two weeks ago Rachel explained it – were able to develop a much better solution.

It seems so simple.. the people can do such wonderful things, accomplish so much, if only nobody destroys and.. kills them... After being reminded just how terrible it is what all the “caretakers” are doing, Kate simply wanted to leave the people alone and never come back. Maybe it would keep them safer? Kate wasn't sure if she could stand the uncertainty. She also wanted to tell the other girls... first at the party and then the meeting with Amber's – of course the other seconds had no idea what they were really doing. Kate wanted to tell them, but...

Of course they would consider her crazy, but she had to do something! And now if Amber tells anyone else what she heard.. perhaps Rachel could at least tell her what they can do to her? The last two weeks were completely quiet – absolutely nothing happened. Nobody seemed to even notice Rachel's disappearance or Kate's having realized the truth. Was she neglecting the danger? The Rachel's voice reminded her of all those warnings – yes, Kate needs to consult her more closely now. Make sure if her behavior is “normal” enough.

Especially her explanation to the people in Amber's chamber – if they talk to anyone and they figure out what Kate knows based on it... She can always play dumb and blame “the micros ignorance”, but it was dangerously close to revealing herself. She couldn't just leave them there not knowing what will most likely happen to them. She had to stop the “alternative” that Amber explained her earlier, how Andrea suggested to turn the zone into some kind of human farm... Kate barely held the tears back then, thinking about the poor people's fate.

But she only told the people how Amber will probably want to kill them and this deal with “reproduction” is to only make sure she doesn't “run out” of them... their leader who spoke back to her seemed to already suspect what it was about and she mainly confirmed their fears. Perhaps she should have left them in the dark.. at least they would be uncertain for some more time. But this seemed like a good plan – on one hand they would try to share some details about how “the repopulation” is progressing and on the other Kate would constantly remind the seconds how hard it is to “grow micros”.

Rachel explained them everything in school, of course, and Amber wouldn't have to ask the firsts if only she paid the slightest attention to the lessons. But then Kate realized how after graduation she was just like Amber now – careful not to break her “micros” and trying to come up with the best way to “have fun with them in a responsible way”. She was so close to actually going that path! If Rachel said anything else during Amber's graduation or the other seconds behaved more carefully – she realized now that back in the first couple of weeks she was merely trying to egoistically save more for...

But no! Kate understands now and she has to at least try help the people. With the micro matter containers on the ground, she walks carefully towards the headphones thinking how she can make sure that Rachel is okay – this “fine” reassertion before she left worries her even more now. At first Kate wanted to drop everything and go check if the mother is not hurt, but if she tried so carefully to conceal this message in her explanations... what if they are actually threatening her?

Kate has never learned much about lives of the regular people here. She realizes now that she completely forgot her plan to have some random interviews and in all this time only spoke with people from the service – which was, after all, some kind of a military here – from what she heard and could correlate with the history from school. Are they oppressing the people? Why have they waited so long before letting Rachel talk with her. Everyone just kept asking about Rachel even despite she was here all along – were they just playing with her? Kate blames herself for not being more interested about their well-being, about the truth of what is going on – all it took to make her forget was a couple distractions...

At least Rachel was alive and finally in touch with her – but how can Kate check if she isn't hurt? Even despite Rachel explained her where she is located, Kate would have no way of saving her, she would be just another dot... No, she needs to play along and give Rachel more time to figure this out. It's too much for Kate – but she needs to be vigilant for any signs or suggestions coming from the mother.

While reaching down for a headphone and putting it on, she starts speaking “casually”:

“This should be all you mentioned, are you sure it is enough? I can get some more, if...”

Rachel interrupts her mid-sentence – another fact that suggests it's her. The people rarely did that, even when she was speaking some silly things: “That's great, it should be more than enough for months or even longer, thank you” - it was another thing that always amazed Kate, her smallest actions had a profound effect on the people lives.. perhaps she should offer more “gifts” in exchange for Rachel's life and well-being? She already asked James to listen to her, but.. there was no way to check what is going on down there. Kate has no idea if she is even looking at the right city right now – she thinks it was the one that Rachel earlier explained she was in, but...

The mother continues after a moment of silence: “Kate, how are you holding up? So much happened recently, are you okay?”

She is unsure how to answer – she is more worried about Rachel's well-being, is this another attempt to suggest something? Kate tries to think what could she mean, but cannot figure out what she could mean – it seems to be a casual concern regarding Kate's problems. Of course now Rachel survival also depends on it.. it was bad enough to have millions of lives rely on her. Kate doesn't know what to answer and after a couple minutes Rachel continues:

“You look worried, is there something on your mind?” - again, no hints. Kate decides to play along:

“Um, I don't know..” - they talked for a while, before she left for the materials and there doesn't seem to be anything she “should” be worried about. Maybe if she turns the question around - “How about you? Are you coping with the situation?”

“Yes” - no hesitation, nothing to suggest anything to Kate.. or others - “I was really scared at first, by the scale of everything and just how different it all is. I don't know how to explain it.. but I heard you were going through a similar process, if I understand correctly?”

“Yeah” - of course hearing about it and even watching the screen was quite different from actually being inside it... if that's even what Rachel is referring to.

“It's simply that.. I had been in the facility for so long – all my life, in fact, just like you. I've never been in the real world. It was quite shocking...” - that's obvious. Kate was also shocked when she saw the images, but is Rachel trying to tell her anything more? She has no idea how the mother would talk if she was really fine... Rachel continues after a long pause - “Listen, about the misunderstanding I mentioned earlier” - this is it - “it wasn't anything serious, I was just confused and scared by this.. by everything.”

It seems that Rachel confirms it could have meant something more than the words suggested and now either denies it, as if she exaggerated – or they persuaded her not to pursue this further. But Kate has no idea if she even understands what the mother may have meant earlier. She feels the need to figure out what to do – but she has no idea! It was Rachel who was supposed to come up with how to “fix things” now – two weeks ago she promised her to stay in touch and not...

No, she needs to think of something – if Rachel is really threatened, then she may not be able to speak freely. But how can she learn what is going on? Despite being ten thousand times larger than every other person in here, she feels so powerless – the only thing the caretakers can do is kill the people. How can she possibly save or even learn more about them? And right now she must figure out if Rachel is really okay – the screen! Of course.. that's why she mentioned it!

“It's okay, I understand” - Kate tries to calm anyone who may be threatening Rachel - “Hey, could you get to the platform here, so we could talk face to face?” - of course it wouldn't be that personal, but definitely the closest thing to a normal conversation that Kate could have with her right now.

“Um.. I don't know... can we?” - she asks somebody else. Kate rarely knows who exactly is she talking to, some people usually listen in and add or answer various questions. It never bothered her, but now she fears the others may hurt Rachel, if they are really holding her.

“Of course – or we could just display the image from here” - Kate can hear Gary's voice. Wherever “here” is – but she tries to keep it simple, she replies:

“Sure” - and carefully rotates towards the screen. It is still pretty early and the sun will make it hard to see anything. Fortunately while the stage opens, Kate figures out a way to give enough shade to make it work – at least enough to see Rachel and if she is hurt or afraid.

After several minutes, the image appears and there she is. Different than Kate remembered her from the last visit – obviously the size, but.. her clothes were different and the hair as well. She seems.. fine. Doesn't look hurt or scared, definitely a bit tense, but at the same time fairly relaxed. It's hard for Kate to tell anything more, since the display is pretty small.

“Hi” - Kate speaks softly and even waves carefully. Rachel seems to turn left and looks somewhere concerned, before she speaks:

“Oh, sorry.. I can't really see you this way, um.. Gary, could you rotate a bit to show Kate what she looks like” - the view rotates and she can see Rachel on the side, looking towards the camera again – and herself far in the distance. Of course the her body is seen from the back and side, laying down in front of the screen – which seems to be located in almost the opposite direction than the city they are in. Kate carefully looks back, but of course she cannot see much – by now she is completely lost which one Rachel was in earlier. Rachel continues - “No, Kate.. please wait, we should rearrange here...”

“It should be better if I sit here and you move to the other side.. no.. we can display Kate on the monitors, come around here” - Gary suggests, the directions remain unknown to Kate – but they move around the room and the view changes again. One thing that she notices is that while Rachel goes around some sort of table in the center of the room, her form takes less space on the screen than Kate's body did out far in the distance...

The room they were in was fairly large – but still, it was absolutely nothing in Kate's scale. At least during this commotion it seems empty, so there shouldn't be anyone to threaten Rachel – except Gary, but Kate doesn't think he would do this. He was always nice and helpful for everyone, he wouldn't behave like that.

After about half of a minute, they settle back down and Rachel resumes: “There, should be much better now” - it's strange how Gary's camera seems to be pointing towards her, but Rachel must be looking at some monitors – Kate could see various things on the wall while they rearranged and Gary's camera was moving around, but couldn't understand any of it.

But at least Kate feels much better now – it seems Rachel is not hurt and she behaves quite openly, but.. why would she mention that part about being “fine”? At least she is okay now – but it's still hard for Kate to accept the fact that the looming shape behind the mother's back is in fact.. herself. No more than two weeks ago they were like equals...

“So.. how are things in the facility nowadays?” - Rachel tries to continue the conversation. Kate is unsure how to answer, after a moment of though she begins:

“I don't know..” - she doesn't want to suggest that nobody even noticed Rachel's disappearance, but it is true – and it feels so strange, if it wasn't for the image on the screen, she would still have hard time believing it - “I guess.. nothing changed, really... I'm trying to avoid meeting others, fortunately the afternoons are quiet and nobody noticed me working on the matter storage.. Oh, sorry, I completely forgot – should I help with the containers?”

“What do you mean?” - Rachel inquires.

“Well, I wanted to move them to wherever it would be best, but just forgot about it...” - Kate meant to ask about it at first, but this whole uncertainty with Rachel confused her.

“I.. could You wait a moment please?” - Rachel asks and she goes silent after the confirmation. It was happening a lot with the others, they needed to discuss things internally – it never annoyed her, but with Rachel here... Kate feels so powerless now. At least she can still see the mother – discussing something with Gary..

“You don't have to always do this, You know” - Kate finally interrupts them.

“Um, I'm sorry.. what do you mean? Do what?” - Rachel inquires confused.

“Go silent like that – even if I won't understand it, I can still try to learn” - she doesn't want to seem unfriendly, but it started to feel really tedious.

“Oh, well..” - the mother starts, but Gary interrupts her:

“We just called the specialists to figure out the best approach for the distribution and it seems sufficient to leave them just where they are.”

“Are you sure?” - Kate inquires - ”I just.. dumped them right where I teleported in...”

“I was told it is good enough location and we don't want to bother you with unnecessary...” - he continues, but she interrupts:

“Oh please, it's not at all a problem, really.”

“Well.. it doesn't really make a difference where...” - but this time Rachel interrupts him:

“I'm sure Kate can at least move it closer to the center of the zone, for the sake of logistics. That's what I would have done” - of course she has much, much more experience with those kinds of things, Kate notices.

Gary pauses for a half a minute and then concludes - “Please allow me to make some inquiries, while.. I'll just call them in...” - and after a moment he begins to explain the topic again – Kate assumes some people must have joined them. The display still shows Rachel – although it seems the camera is a bit closer, as if Gary was leaning forward. At least Kate assumed it was Gary who recorded it... there is no way for her to be sure.

After the explanation is finished, another voice appears:

“Uh, I.. well, I suppose it could be beneficial to bring it.. a bit closer to...” - very shy at first, just like everybody new that talked to her.

“Oh, hi! What's your name?” - Kate always tries to make them more comfortable, although ever since first seeing herself on the screen, she can understand why they feel uneasy around her...

“Miss, I..” - a pause - “I'm a transportation officer second class of the... John Li, at your service.”

“Hello, nice to meet you. You were saying?” - this usually helped a bit.

“Oh, miss Johnson was.. um, I mean.. Rachel.. was correct that it may be beneficial if...”

“It's settled them, just tell me where to put them down!” - she already rises up carefully, it is really not a problem.. if only they would tell her more about what they needed. She feels stupid for not asking about those things earlier, it feels like she should know that the people would need more materials... Has Rachel explained it to them in school? Kate couldn't remember anything like that, but she feels dumb for not even realizing it – like they had to explain her everything or she wouldn't understand a thing.

At least now she can help them a bit. After carefully gathering some containers – she can leave the rest for another walk – Kate follows the explanations carefully and takes several careful steps on the dedicated points outside her spot. She haven't walked around since Amber came in and... Kate still feels bad about that moment, maybe if she was closer when the second appeared – there were so many things she could have done to prevent it.

After a dozen steps, she locates a tiny vehicle flying down in front of her and follows it to where it lands, marking the deposition spot. She carefully moves the small containers she has collected, the bigger one was left back in her spot. Every time she asks if the position is good – at first they don't complain, but eventually start suggesting some slight corrections. They seem very shy about asking her to do anything – how many times in the past she has assumed they would tell her if something was wrong? But how can Kate explain them not to worry about it and just speak out.. she feels she already did so many times...

Maybe Rachel will help them with it – even though Kate feels bad about her appearance here, but least it answers why the mother went silent two weeks ago. The only question is what to do now.. Kate was really hoping the Gary's emergency ID would help with something and maybe she could figure out something... Rachel elaborated on several occasions how she was still trying to figure out what happened during the shutdown and how to revert it. Both in the school and outside – it all was so.. abstract and hard for Kate to imagine. The life before the shutdown...

Maybe should she bring some more materials – even despite they say it was enough. The containers seem so small and it was so easy to acquire them.. or perhaps should she get some people out to another chamber? They mentioned several times that the zone being fairly crowded – even Rachel taught them in school, when she... “Of course!” - Kate concludes in her thoughts - “That's just what I have to do!”

The sudden realization makes her almost drop one of the containers – the constant contact with her skin was critical for the dilation field acceleration modifier to work.. they seem fairly strong, but would probably break if she tried to catch it mid-fall. Kate has no idea what this “Pu” is – all containers are labeled with strange symbols like that – but it would surely make a lot of mess. Not to mention that she heard raised voices through the headphone in the background.. they must have noticed her clumsiness. This was probably the reason they didn't want her to even come here – all her actions inside are extremely dangerous for the people.

But now she quickly finishes slowly depositing the rest of containers and comes back for the “bio-support pack” - whatever it meant. Strangely enough, they ask her to deposit it somewhere else. Was it bad of her to handle it together with the others? She doesn't want to inquire about it – careful not to be distracted again. She just wants to deliver it and go back to execute what Rachel suggested her.

A couple minutes later she is back in her spot and asks them to actually travel to the podium in front of the screen – using an excuse that it is awkward to watch them in some strange remote location. It wasn't really a problem for her, but she needs Rachel and Gary here for what she has planned next.

Excusing herself for a moment, she goes back to the facility and assembles some plates, taking them to one of her empty chambers and carefully arranges them around the place. It would be best to have one nearby when she randomly arrives again. She also placed some together for the dress, just like Rachel suggested. But right now she needs to get back to the mother and does just that when she is content with the distribution.

Back in the zone, she picks up one headphone to wear and another one just in case. Making sure that they have moved to the screen, Kate carefully lays down in front of it and notices the afternoon sun is becoming even more inconvenient – she can hardly distinguish any details on it and her hand doesn't help with shading. At least she can see two tiny dots on the podium. Judging by the image on the screen, she figures the one slightly in the back must be Rachel and speaks very softly:

“There you are.. I can see you... hi!”

“Well, yes.. we can see you as well.. I guess... I mean...” - Rachel responds after a moment with uncertain voice. Kate can only imagine how scary the view must be for her down there and it will be even worse in a moment.

“Please try not to move.. and don't worry...” - she simply instructs before moving her left arm forward. It is fairly awkward, since Kate needs to place her pointing finger on the back of the podium with the nail down and still be able to operate the wristcom with her right hand, which is fixed on the left arm. Lowering the hand, she can just barely notice the dots underneath and hopes the quakes are not too strong for them...

After setting the hand down, Kate looks at the display to see that they are okay and despite the confused look on her face and rotating back and forth, Rachel doesn't say anything. Nobody does, in fact – so Kate finally continues:

“Rachel.. get on, please” - and she hopes she will be able to do that... Kate wasn't expecting this problem, but she notices on the screen that from their perspective, the nail is a fairly high wall – will Rachel be able to climb it? Can Kate do anything more to help her? She cannot think of anything, so just waits.

“Wha.. What do you mean?” - Rachel asks after a minute of awkward silence.

“Just hop on, don't worry about anything” - Kate tries to comfort her, but.. she is worried about this herself. This time, she seems to start walking towards it and Gary must be standing still, since the camera doesn't move. If earlier she was concerned if there would be enough space on the nail – she preferred to keep them short – now she is just.. shocked again how enormous she looks in their scale.

After several minutes of walking, she can see Rachel climbing up – but only on the screen, it's impossible to distinguish her in normal view when she reaches the nail. Kate concludes that she should wait a minute or two before moving forward – so she just tries to measure the passing time. Eventually she breaks the uneasy silence:

“Are you settled in alright?”

This time Rachel replies quickly - “I think.. yes, but... what are you...”

“Don't worry” - Kate repeats and moves her right hand to finish the teleportation sequence on the wristcom. When back in the empty chamber, she checks the population counter – and it has changed from zero to one. She is relieved that the plan worked. But how to proceed? She is lying down on her belly – in the exact same shape she was laying down before teleporting... She hopes that Rachel is still on her fingernail, because if she has fallen somewhere.. Kate would have no way of ever finding the mother. Looking around, she notices the nearest plate being quite far away and...

“Kate.. what have you...” - she hears Rachel voice.

“Oh, I can hear you.. I thought you may need to...” - apparently the mother doesn't need to take the communication device from the headphone - “never mind, it's so good to finally see you safe and sound” - of course Kate cannot actually “see” her.

“What do you mean? I.. I don't understand...” - her “passenger” starts. Was Kate mistaken? Has she misinterpreted her words? It wouldn't be the first time this would happen, but...

“Rachel, didn't you mention how disturbed you were just moments ago?” - did she? After a long period of silence, Kate begins to worry again whether the mother is not hurt by her rash action. She was perfectly still, but... at least the population counter still shows one, so she should be alive - “Rachel, are you okay? Please talk to me...” - but what if her “passenger” has lost communication with her. Should she move towards one of the plates to see her more clearly? It seems like she inflicted death even unknowingly...

“I'm fine. I mean.. okay” - good, Kate is relieved again.. and Rachel seems to confirm what the second has figured out about the being “fine”, but what could she have meant then... - “Look, about that... I.. I didn't want it to sound like that. I guess maybe I meant it at the time, but...” - the voice is certainly much more distressed than back in the other zone, is she crying? Kate would like to see her.. or ideally be able to comfort the mother, but.. at with this ridiculous size difference... - “I shouldn't have worried you with all this, I was so stupid and reckless.. I didn't know anything and I...”

“But you did suggest you may be hurt like after.. you canceled the school?” - Kate has to be sure about this.

“Yes.. I did. But don't worry, nobody hurt me in your chamber – unlike two years ago when Lisa broke my arm.. among other things” - there was no way anybody else could know this, maybe except some other mothers – but the people in her chamber would have no way of figuring out what the reference to being fine really meant - “Kate.. look, I..”

Kate certainly feels better about everything – and Rachel begins to explain how terrified and ignorant she was when she first appeared inside Kate's chamber. How she ignored reason and began plotting some silly plots.

“But why haven't they told me.. to keep you like this for two weeks?”

“Because they didn't know.. I only admitted this yesterday and before... I was just one of them in there. And a problematic one, without any history or knowledge about things, they treated me like I was crazy... I don't blame them, I behaved like that.. afraid of being discovered and hurt – but I'm so sorry I let my silliness bother you...”

“Hey, it's okay.. I'm just happy you are okay. Even if it's also shocking to find you like this...” - Kate really doesn't mind. She thinks how she would behave if she was put through such ordeal. She had trouble understanding things from the inside of the zone and if she actually found herself.. inside – would she go insane? It's impossible to imagine.. could it happen to her as well? She is suddenly afraid if this was what Rachel was referring to that could happen if the others found out and... No, there is no need to worry the mother about it now. Right now Kate needs to make sure everything is really okay - “So things are okay between you and the people, nobody hurt you or anything?”

“Yes, and no – they all have been very helpful and instructive when they found out about my.. ignorance about their ways.”

“What do you mean?” - it sounds strange.. Rachel always seemed to know so much about everything, what could they have done to surprise her? And could it be a good thing?

“Nothing you should be worried about, it's just.. I didn't expect to find such sophisticated society anywhere in the chambers. They actually advanced after the shutdown and...” - she continues explaining some details on their organization. Kate knew most of them already, but never really thought about it. She never paid much attention to any other zones and this was just.. natural for her.

“So you are sure that the people are fine there?” - Kate eventually asks to reconfirm.

“Well.. yes, I haven't seen too many of them, but I understand that they are happy and content with their society and with you there.”

This surprises Kate greatly - “But.. ever since I appeared there I brought them nothing but death and suffering. I can only imagine how scared they all must be of me and despite my best efforts of reassuring them, it feels like I'm some sort of monster for them... I should have never even come to that place. They would be better off without me and.. and...”

“Oh Kate...” - Rachel interrupts her, but stops.

“Yes?” - was she wrong about all this?

“I don't know how to explain it, but after I admitted who I am and they started taking me seriously, it was all like.. Most of the people seem to adore you down there. Perhaps even more, sometimes I felt almost like some people loved you – everyone you are in contact with is more distant and careful, but I could see that...”

“Wait, I don't understand.. what do you mean by love me?” - Kate interrupts. She is familiar with the word, but she only heard it in the context of the caretakers feelings for each other, especially when Kate's older sister - Christina - and April had “a thing” for each other, as they called it. Amy suggested how it may have been something more – something that Kate didn't understand at a time. Like a special emotion about someone that makes people very important to each other. Amy also often admitted in private that she loved her, and Christina as well – and all mothers did love their daughters, but.. it was strange how only Kate's mother would ever show it.

It seemed the only thing like this that Kate knew was the friendship between the seconds and it was more of uneasy agreement to meet every now and then – she usually preferred to be alone, even before she got her own chamber, but... it was also nice to meet up and talk about things. Or have fun together – but not too often, it was more tedious than fun, really. But for the people to “love” Kate? It seemed strange. Rachel was taking her time to think about how to explain it, apparently, and finally continues:

“It's more like a feeling that I got.. the way how they speak about you. It's not fear, but rather understanding of your situation in there and some kind of admiration at the same time. The people may seem dry and emotionless when you talk with them, but that's because they respect you” - she explains.

“But I'm just.. I feel so stupid talking with them, like I don't know anything! And they had to teach me so much about their world and even knew the facility better than me...”

“Kate, it's not like that.. as I mentioned, they understand your situation and.. they are grateful how good you are for them. Those who know the alternatives are grave because they fear you may turn to be like the others...”

“They know? But how can they know about the others?” - the brief visits from Amber and Nicole weren't enough to suggest what was happening in the outside world, was it?

“Well.. you and other seconds have given them some clues, I'm afraid... And also..” - also? Nobody else was ever inside her zone, before the meeting two weeks ago, Kate was uncertain if she should let Rachel in – of course now it's all irrelevant... - “I heard you brought a little parasite with you some time ago.”

“A para.. a what?” - she is completely lost, but Rachel explains her how there she has unknowingly smuggled a person from the Lauren's zone and he was surprisingly helpful with informing them about the outside world.

“Oh no, I had no idea.. is that person.. is he okay?”

“Yes, I heard he landed safely and actually likes your zone much more than Lauren's salon...” - well, it was true.. at least he doesn't have to work for those monsters – Kate realizes, but how could he tell them so much... Well, it actually makes some sense – it was about the time they became more distant from Kate. She thought it was her confession, but they must have learned more and probably feared her as well. If only she could explain them – maybe Rachel could? She must know that Kate understands and would never do anything like that...

In the meantime the mother talks about various things - “... or when I was on the streets, I saw many people wearing caretaker uniforms.. well, they were just stylized like yours, but some of them actually chose to wear a simple dresses instead of one of a multitude of shapes and colors that are available. They really are impressed by your kindness and ...” - Kate was only paying half of her attention to it, but it seemed.. strange. Everyone in the facility would actually dread those uniforms and wanted to have some more interesting clothes, but if the people were really “impressed” by her...

Especially after the person from Lauren zone explaining them... “Shit, I forgot about the meeting with Lauren!” - Kate interrupts and check the time. Fortunately she is good – still almost an hour left. It was annoying that Lauren never wanted to meet up whenever they had the time, like everybody else – but instead made fixed schedules and would complain for weeks if anyone missed it. She even mentioned it was a private meeting, but still insisted on deferring it to a particular time – and since the temp wristcom didn't have the builtin alarm...

“Meeting? What meeting?” - Rachel inquires.

“Well, I.. should have mentioned it earlier” - although she did tell the people about it a couple days ago, when Lauren organized it. They used to remind her of things like that. At first they was surprised she cannot set timers or calendar entries for such things, but.. she must have seemed pathetic to them – unable to deal with such trivial things - “I don't know.. Lauren wanted to meet with me to talk about something” - but then realizes the other mother may have figured out something - “Oh no.. do you think she have found out I know about the.. people?”

“Um.. has anything happened to suggest her that?”

Kate thinks about it for a moment – she hasn't met or heard from her since the visit in the “salon” and it is unlikely, but the mothers always seemed to know so much about everything. What if Lauren somehow found out about.. but no – it was even before Kate met up with the other seconds. Maybe Rachel will be able to make some sense of it – so she explains the mother her worries.

“I see..” - Rachel finally concludes - “it's probably just one of the silly chats that she enjoys. I don't think she found out – in fact, you don't have to worry about that so much. It would take much more than a hint or two from you about being careful with the 'micros'” - she emphasizes this word - “to give you away. Everybody will think that you are just struggling with the training and so on...”

“But.. I met Amber in the morning and I think I told her too much. I..” - and Kate explains the earlier meeting and how she explained the people in that zone - “what if they tell everyone?”

“I don't think.. You made sure that Amber couldn't hear you?” - Rachel inquired and Kate confirms - “In that case I think the people will prefer death than giving you away. Not to mention that it would seem like some crazy story for the other girls and mothers won't bother to listen to Amber's 'micros'” - she pauses for a moment - “I think you did a really brave thing out there, but I don't believe you should repeat it anywhere else. If any mothers get actually interested in your behavior, then the clues like this could lead them to realizing that you know...”

“But do you think they may have somehow figured it out already?” - Kate is still worried.

“I.. Look, Kate.. we.. the mothers aren't some kind of supernatural beings – it's just that with the extra knowledge and.. after centuries of living in the facility they simply know much more than you. But you can also take advantage of this – since.. they are also very stiff and used to how the things are. The firsts haven't realized what the world is really like and they have no reason to expect any of the seconds or thirds to accomplish that either. Especially after the school failed.. I'm sorry.. I was one of them – in the end I tried to teach you something about the... I failed that as well, I..”

“Hey, Rachel.. it's okay. I wouldn't have realized anything without you! It's.. I don't care if you think you were like the others – but I know you weren't” - Kate tries to reassure her. There she is.. holding her hand absolutely still on the ground so the mother will not fall to her death and trying to.. comfort her? Is she even in a situation to do that? It all seems like an empty act, but.. it feels right. Like Rachel tried to comfort her two weeks ago, Kate should help her now.

“Thanks.. it really means.. a lot” - Rachel simply responds.

After a moment of silence, Kate inquires - “So what do I do now? I can't just talk with Lauren after everything that has happened. What if I say too much or give something away by..”

“I don't think you need to worry about Lauren so much” - Rachel interrupts her - “You are so smart and I'm sure you can easily avoid that.”

“But I'm not! I.. I don't understand anything about what is going on – I only know what you and some people in my chamber told me and.. I don't even get half of it, I feel like...” - she is lost in how to even explain how ignorant she is about everything...

“Kate, relax.. please!” - she is worried that her anxiety may have endangered Rachel, but she has kept her hand absolutely still on the ground and the mother continues - “I know it all may be hard for you, but you have to believe in yourself. You are the only one to have realized what the truth is.. and the firsts had three years in their own chambers for that. Nobody even thought that they can actually be people! When you approached me during Amber's graduation, I wasn't sure what you meant because I felt there was no way you could figure it out so quickly! Of course you had some help from me and others, but you were always the smartest girl I knew.”

Kate wishes it could be true.. it seems now that the only thing she ever did was listen – and allowed everybody to teach her. First her mother, then Rachel and finally the people in her chamber... but it doesn't make her smart at all:

“I haven't figured out anything on my own, just like you said – I was only taught! I had no idea what to do after you showed up and it was only thanks to your suggestions that I was able to...”

“Kate, slow down, please..” - it was true, she was frantic right now - “what are you talking about?”

“You mentioned the screen so I could ask to see you and pointed me to figure out I can get you out.. I mean.. you did that on purpose, just like the fine part, right?”

It takes Rachel a couple dozen seconds to respond - “I never.. I honestly haven't thought about that. I can see how it might seem I suggested the screen and.. this, but it wasn't my intent. I'm sorry again I bothered you with my stupid hallucinations.. but I wouldn't have come up with anything like this. It was only you that have connected the dots and it was very smart of you! I mean.. it's just like I told you...”

Kate thinks about this for a minute. It was true that Rachel seemed very surprised when she asked her to climb up and even worse after being brought here... She wasn't very enthusiastic about being recorded either – Kate thought she was just trying not to give herself away, but it could just as well be like she said now. Could it really be that she connected the dots and figured out something that Rachel wouldn't think of? It seems strange.. all her life she was shy and timid, trying to avoid doing anything original, not thinking independently and...

“Don't forget that Lauren won't have a clue you may know so much” - Rachel adds - ”To her, you are just another ignorant brat and she probably wants to manipulate you somehow. I doubt she will even ask anything that could give you away..”

“But what if she does” - Kate interrupts.

“Well.. you can always imagine what Nicole or Amber would have answered. You should know them pretty well by now, right?” - this actually sounds like a fairly easy thing to do.. Kate was like them her whole life and it shouldn't be a problem - “If you don't know what to say, you can always remain silent. Other mothers usually assumed you are shy and boring...”

Well, it is true – even when all seconds were in Lauren salon, she was only asked two or three questions during the whole discussion. Nobody cared about her during the graduations – even in her own party it was Nicole that talked with everybody and maintained the “friendly” atmosphere. And almost nobody noticed her leaving Amber's graduation.. the problem was that it was only Lauren that did.

But maybe Rachel is right? After all, the other seconds didn't have a clue – maybe she shouldn't worry that much about Lauren? The dress should be convincing enough that she is dealing with her micros – again, it worked with the seconds. But she also asks:

“Maybe you could give me some advices to how to act around Lauren?”

Rachel answers with uncertain voice - “I'm not sure what to say about her.. she was always lazy and selfish. I never bothered to get closer to her, I.. She haven't tried either and I don't see why she would want to learn anything about you now. If you don't know what to do, you can always indulge her with some empty compliments – about how smart and experienced she is or perhaps how you'd like to be like her...”

Kate recalls it was just what Nicole did and it worked flawlessly – although it's hard to say whether she was honest about it or not. The other seconds knew so little... she could just as well be really jealous of Lauren. Either way, it almost seems like a plan now and they spend the next half hour with Rachel explaining Kate various details about Lauren's personality, how other girls behaved and how to explain her “training” methods, if necessary – to avoid suggesting that she even talks with the “micros”. The vocabulary was also very important and she practiced a little to make sure that she won't hesitate for too long.

Then Kate realizes how rude it is of her to hold Rachel out here.. stranded under her fingernail – and explains how they should get back now, just in time for her to get ready for meeting Lauren. She rises most carefully to crouching and starts plugging the coords to the zone. The last thing Rachel asks is not to mention what they talked about – especially her confession in the beginning. She was already ashamed of her ignorance and wouldn't want them to think she is crazy.

“And one last thing..” - Rachel adds - “I noticed that every time you enter your chamber you go straight to the headphone and talk with whoever is on the other side. I just wanted to suggest that it may be nice to acknowledge the other people as well every now and then, you know” - but Kate has no idea:

“What do you mean.. Acknowledge them, how?”

“Well, it's enough to say hello and goodbye casually in the morning and in the evening... Think how you would feel if somebody ignored your existence” - Kate never thought about that, really.. they couldn't talk back to her without a headphone and she was.. already used to only talking with several people on a daily basis. Even when she first arrived, she wasn't really “greeting” them, but rather wanted to seem “friendly” to her “micros”... Not to mention that back then she only addressed the village she approached rather than everyone in the zone and it was the only time she said anything like that. After a pause, Rachel finishes - “Just a hint, if you feel like it - I always did it in my chambers.”

It's so.. obvious. Kate was a loner, but still felt a bit hurt when other girls ignored her during breakfasts or when randomly meeting in the facility. She didn't care about the mothers – most ignored all of their daughters, but it was nice to hear something from them every now and then.. even if it was just “hi” or “see you”. Sure, Amy and Rachel were usually nice to her, but she hardly ever met them in the facility in the last couple of years – her mother was always busy, eating early and coming back late and Rachel.. she was simply trying to avoid everybody else.

Was this how the people feel? Like she's some.. snobbish giant roaming around? Rachel was so generous to call her smart and everything, but.. Kate still feels so stupid. There's just so much that she needs to learn! Maybe this could actually help her when dealing with others? If Kate doesn't know how to behave nicely around the little people in the other zones, she wouldn't give away the fact that she understands... The only problem is that she doesn't want to be ignorant.. she wants to learn and to show them that she is actually good!

But now Kate confirms that Rachel is safe on her finger and she goes back to her chamber to drop her off and pick up the dress. This time she'll change like a responsible person... and not in front of all the people in the zone. She still has her headphone on and upon arrival hears Gary asking if everything is fine – and this time they can both honestly answer yes, although it is funny how he seems to be referring to the Rachel's “code”. Kate happily adds that they just had a girly chat and there's nothing to worry – they were probably worried about her dramatic exit.

But once Rachel is off her fingernail – dropped just outside the spot next to where they appeared, Kate is relieved it all went smoothly and moves carefully to pick up the dress. There is still fifteen minutes left, so she moves the dress to the empty zone first, then teleports back to her room to fix herself a bit and only then to change – although at the last moment, she decides to leave the caretaker uniform in her quarters. Dilating and dedilating wears the material down very quickly – and it would happen if she disrobed inside a chamber.

After dressing up, she notices that there are still five minutes before the appointment. After considering popping up earlier, she decides not to – Lauren is very particular about her schedule – and instead, Kate prefers to check if everything is “okay” with Rachel. She still cannot forget how Rachel suggested that she may be hurt. But even with the mother reassuring, Kate prefers to double check – maybe their attitude changed after their little conspiracy? She cannot imagine James or Gary trying to hurt Rachel, but.. she just wants to make sure.

Arriving back in her chamber, she quickly notices a blinking headphone next to her – she left the one she was wearing inside when departing earlier. Worrying if there's something wrong, Kate picks it up quickly – but a joyful Rachel's voice greets her before she can even say anything:

“Kate, you look gorgeous!”

“Oh...” - is the only sound she can produce and blushes slightly. She feels better than the first time wearing it – apparently not undressing in front of everybody allowed her to maintain some amount of dignity... She still feels like half the zone can see her underwear – it's probably not that bad.. maybe just the ones nearby, like surely around the edges of her spot and possibly a city or two... Why haven't she asked for trousers?

They must have heard details on their “fashion” from this guy she “smuggled” Lauren's salon and.. why every other caretaker insisted on dresses? They seemed not to care about what the people see at all – have they got no decency? Well, the other girls didn't care, but the mothers... At least Rachel never worn one – it was so ridiculous. But now she compliments her casually...

“It's all thanks to the designers who figured out how to make the dress” - she recalls how she haven't thanked them.. should she address them more directly now? It seems she doesn't have a lot of time, maybe later.. but she must remember about this. Like Rachel said – how would she feel if her effort went unnoticed? And they must have worked very hard to make it.

“Yes, the dress is great” - Rachel replies - “but it's you, who look simply perfect” - is she trying to reinforce her? Compliments usually help others, but Kate isn't used to receiving any and doesn't know what more she can say – the mother must have noticed it and cheers - “Don't worry and make us proud.. go get her!”

“Thanks...” - it's not the time yet, but Kate thinks she'll start crying, if she hears another compliment from Rachel. Or even worse – from anybody else...

So Kate teleports back to the empty zone and waits a couple minutes. She thinks if she missed some secret message in what Rachel said, but cannot notice anything – it was just natural, like.. she so rarely heard the caretakers compliment each other. The firsts were always jealous when anyone got something nice and the mothers didn't bother about such things. No, now is not the time to worry and she needs to calm down before visiting Lauren.

After waiting several minutes in silence, Kate realizes she is already a bit late – but it shouldn't matter that much. It's strange how she hasn't received anything from Lauren. From what Kate heard from Rachel, she usually sent all the details right before the appointment and it happened exactly like that when she invited the seconds to her salon. Unsure of what she should do, Kate sends a mesg – and receives one with the details a minute later.

Teleporting there, she first looks down at her feet and nearest vicinity. The zone seems to be uninhabited or at least she must have appeared in an empty area. Good – she will not have to explain why she steps so carefully around the people. “No, micros..” - she corrects herself in her thoughts.. using that word in the presence of any mother would be bad.

Next, she raises her eyes searching for Lauren and notices... shit! She isn't alone – Erica and Nicole seem to be talking with her. Kate begins walking towards the three, thinking what it can mean – she wasn't expecting this. What if they found out.. if Amber told Nicole and then that bitch passed it to her mother? It could be very bad...

But it's too late to fix anything. Kate can always deny everything, say how Amber must have misunderstood her – or perhaps even say that she haven't spoken with her? Maybe just play dumb at first... she wishes she could consult Rachel about this – but it would be even worse if she went back to her zone now. No, she needs to casually approach them and try to figure out what is it that they want.

They don't even seem to have noticed Kate – or don't care about her arrival. Maybe it's something unrelated and she has nothing to worry? There is only one way to be sure and she walks towards them. One more detail that she spots from the distance is that Nicole seems to have a dress as well. Lauren is also nicely clothed – as usual – but Erica has only the standard uniform, which suggests that this isn't important enough for her to care. She usually walks around her zones in it and Kate used to meet her like this back when she was playing with Nicole – but the mother dresses up whenever she has anything larger planned.

Maybe this is simply a coincidence? As Kate approaches the three caretakers, she evaluates Nicole carefully. The dress is much more sophisticated than her one-piece, it follows the usual style of the caretakers clothes – thicker and rigid, with emblems of various shapes and colors. Unlike Kate's plain blue cloth, it seems more like it was painfully constructed and is much harder to wear. The main problem with micro-matter clothes is that they break so easily. One wrong move and they can fall apart completely – at least the clothes other mothers and the firsts had.

The dress people in her chamber made for Kate is completely different: soft, elastic and durable. It sticks closer to the skin rather than loosely fly around, but doesn't constrain her movements at all. Even despite being much simpler, it must be nice – any clothing other than the uniform is considered “pretty” and Rachel did compliment her. Maybe it shouldn't be a problem then, so Kate can focus on the discussion without worrying about her looks. Nicole seems to have noticed her and looks straight at her with a confident expression on her face.. almost bold or perhaps even smug. It doesn't matter – Kate needs to see what the mothers say.

Just before she enters their voice range, Lauren stops talking and also looks at her – it seemed the mothers were conversing the whole time. Kate appeared at their side and Nicole is a couple steps further, roughly facing the direction she is coming from. The other second must have failed to spot her earlier being busy listening to the conversation.

Erica must have noticed the others looking at the new arrival and she turns her head towards her as well. Kate was worried the mother may want to talk to her and Erica speaks first: “Kate, how sweet of you to visit us” - as if it was her to organize this. Could it? Lauren planned it days in advance – were they suspecting something already?

“Hello” - Kate mutters, afraid of what comes next.

“And look at your cute dress! We were just discussing how important it is to include you girls in the proper procedures, seeing how mature you are becoming...”

“It won't change my position on this” - Lauren throws in.

“Can't you look beyond your petty plots after seeing how responsible our daughters are now? Come here, you..” - Erica motions towards Kate, but doesn't wait for the move and approaches the second herself. After encompassing Kate with her left hand, she adds - “How long can you ignore they've grown?”

Kate doesn't return the act – in fact, she doesn't move at all. This must be one of their games and she has nothing to add to it. Erica is easily six inches taller than her and it would be impractical to casually return her hug now. Kate waits for this show to end, but neither mother says anything for at least a minute. Eventually, Erica lets go of Kate and casually walks towards Nicole – apparently trying to emphasize her message using her daughter as well – but the other second seems less comfortable with it.

Nicole was standing a couple steps further from the pack and now even tries to back away further. Kate usually just lets the mothers do whatever they want with her and quickly retreat to peace and silence of being alone – it's the easiest way to avoid confrontation. It seems to have worked perfectly now.

Erica speeds up and she must have walked to far away from Kate, since she cannot hear anything. Lauren is still silent, but Erica and Nicole seem to be arguing about something. Has Kate missed something earlier? There must have been something going on between those three and she simply doesn't want to participate in it – chances are that she was even caught in it accidentally.

It seems like.. Nicole doesn't want her mother to approach her and when Erica tries to do this regardless, she tries to push her away – it's a bit strange, since Nicole was never behaving like that. Kate would expect her to shine in such situation, especially with the new clothes and everything. Suddenly, the sudden movement makes her dress top piece to rip apart, revealing her right breast as she desperately tries to cover up.

They seem to have stopped arguing and Lauren speaks – Kate is still just a four or five feet away from her and can hear her just fine - “Looks like they haven't matured as much as you'd thought.”

Both Nicole and Erica gaze at her with angry expressions – although the daughter is far more frantic with it. Erica starts talking again – but Kate cannot hear it - and Lauren just watches them for a moment in silence and speaks only when Erica seems to have finished:

“No, maybe if you taught her to practice some more with her new clothes instead of playing in the mud...” - Erica almost turns red hearing this and speaks something to Nicole. Kate thinks about what the other mother mentioned – it was true that the other second seemed a bit dirty now, with tiniest traces of brownish substance around her face, but Kate wouldn't think twice about it earlier.

Amber mentioned something in the morning about their friend having some troubles with cleaning up – but it was very immature to appear dirty at any social gatherings... On the other hand micro matter was very tedious to get rid of if it stuck to the skin. Kate thinks about the possible reasons for what she has just seen, but Erica speaks something towards Lauren, waves at Kate and leaves – followed quickly by Nicole.

Lauren looks at her only remaining guest and speaks - “And that's why I prefer to keep meetings private...” - is this a reference to Kate revealing the fact the mother wanted to meet? She mentioned Amber something about it to get out from her – tired of trying not to say her too much, but... Has Nicole talked to the second to hear about it? Have they mentioned it earlier? Kate quickly concludes it's better to admit the harmless fact to seem honest – it may come in handy when she will need to lie later...

“Uh, I'm sorry.. I must have babbled something about it earlier...” - trying to seem simple and immature. Lauren shrugs it off and adds:

“Don't worry.. and you shouldn't let Erica manipulate you like that, you know” - the same advice could apply to her as well - “But now lets get back to why I asked you to meet me. Give me a moment please...” - and she turns back walking towards something some distance away. Kate doesn't move since she wasn't asked to and thinks about how the meeting turned out so far.

It doesn't seem any mother suspected anything – they were busy playing their games and Lauren even seemed completely content with her little confession. There didn't seem to be anything that Kate should be worried about so far, so she just waits for the mother to return. Maybe it is like Rachel explained – everyone considers her to be ignorant and immature, completely unaware of how the world works. It feels so.. strange – like hiding in plain sight...

Suddenly she can see Lauren in a completely different light – deceiving her was so easy, it seems. She was actually much shorter than her, barely a couple inches over five feet tall – compared to Kate's five seven. They never thought about mothers in this way, they were always distant and powerful – but the height made her probably the shortest caretaker after the thirds grew up... Well, except Rachel now, of course, but it doesn't really count..

On the other hand it probably was Rachel's predicament that made Kate notice such things. And even think about other mothers in this way – she recalls how vulnerable the mother was back in her zone, asking her for help and protection. Even if it was just caused by shock of her change and made Kate unnecessarily worried – it also showed her very plainly that the mothers were just people. Maybe Rachel was right and Kate has nothing to worry about? Just keep calm and avoid giving any details about anything – it seems like nothing can go wrong.

Lauren walks back towards her with a small package on her hand. Kate surveys it, but cannot figure out anything about it, so just waits for the explanations. When the mother reaches the voice distance, she speaks:

“It turns out that my micros didn't need all those food synthesizers and I can give you back four of them. I'm sure your zone will make better use of them...” - Kate looks at her with disbelief.. was this all Lauren wanted to do now? Their little “argument” after Amber's graduation seems so ancient and.. almost childish to the second now – especially considering all she has been through recently. All the realizations and discoveries. It's just... - “Don't be like that, I'm just trying to help you.”

Of course she is... – it was probably her plan all along, like Erica called it.. “petty plots”? But now Kate needs to maintain her cover:

“Oh, I'm just.. I don't know what to say...”

“It's okay, just take them and make sure your micros don't start dying of hunger or anything. They'll probably need to regain their strength after making such nice dress!” - it was the closest thing to a compliment that most mothers were capable of, it seems...

“Thanks...” - Kate tries to smile - “and thank you for the synthesizers, it will really help my 'micros' a lot..” - of course she knows that the people are just fine without it, especially with the materials she delivered. Yes, the people seemed to manage just fine – as long as nobody was killing them. But this mention that they could die of hunger...

“Oh look at you, all mature and responsible now, unlike many others...” - she probably refers to Nicole's little “accident” - “I wish my Andrea could behave like you” - or that.. Well, it is true, Lauren's daughter was usually just like Lisa or her daughter.. completely careless and greedy. This similarity was probably how she could become friends with Amber so easily... Well, it seems the second is already more reasonable than that, but she still only wants her “micros” to reproduce so she can abuse them later on. But.. not now – Kate should respond somehow:

“Thank you...” - she thinks if maybe she could act ignorant about what happened just earlier - “Um.. about what happened earlier...” - Lauren looks at her curiously, was it a bad idea to induce interest in her? - “what was all that about?” - Kate finishes simplistically.

“Don't worry about it, it was nothing..” - Lauren starts and ponders it in silence. Just as uncertain about what to say as Kate, it seems - “You know how Erica always is..” - of course she doesn't. The mothers always talk like this, which used to make them seem smart and experienced, but now it's just pathetic. Kate feels there's nothing more behind it, other than one of Erica's own “petty plots” - as she so nicely summarized it herself. But Lauren suddenly adds - “You should be proud of yourself, chances are you will soon be much more important and everything.”

But what can she mean? It doesn't make any sense – she cannot refer to Kate's discoveries, the mothers would likely reprimand her if they found out. Unable to figure it out, Kate decides to act completely ignorant and blurt - “What do you mean?”

“Oh you know..” - again behaving like everything was obvious.. it's so annoying. But Lauren also seems to consider what to say and only after a moment adds ambiguously - “Erica is crazy again about reinstating the caretaker training and I'd say you make a perfect candidate for it...”

What could it mean? Caretaker training.. now Kate is completely lost. They were all caretakers, but – was there something more to it? She sometimes wondered how some mothers know so much and are able to do much more around the facility, but it was always part of their “distant awesomeness”. Why would Erica want to train them? If anything, from what Rachel said it would seem that she was always against anything like that. It seems.. strange.

“Oh, don't worry about it” - Lauren adds, obviously noticing Kate's puzzlement - “You'll see it's nothing fancy, really” - that's all great, but WHAT is it! - “Hey, have you seen Rachel recently, by any chance?”

“Rachel..” - what... does she know? No! Kate must stay calm - “no, I.. why do you...”

“You two were always close and the last time I seen her was with you at the Amber's party” - it's true, but.. has she somehow figured out that Rachel is in her chamber? Is it possible that... - “Oh, never mind. I was just curious if maybe the hermit let anybody know she is still alive.”

So.. simple. It seems Lauren treats her like a kid and wouldn't think that she could possibly know anything. Just like Rachel said.. but Kate figures she better not take any chances now and ask others what it could possibly mean. Rachel should know something, if Erica is crazy “again” on this topic – also Gary and other ex-caretakers could know a lot about the training itself. It's hard to say how to approach it now, but then again, Lauren doesn't seem to expect the second to do anything now, so...

“Um, Lauren.. I... thank you for the synthesizers again and if I could just...”

“Go ahead and take them to your micros. Make us proud!” - proud.. like.. Rachel said. Could it be a coincidence? Should Kate be worried? It all just seems so.. complicated, like everyone wanted to manipulate her now. Is Rachel also trying to... No! She needs to tell her everything and ask to help out with this.

So Kate just grabs the tiny package from Lauren's outstretched hand, mumbles something about being thankful again and inputs the coords back to the empty zone to change her clothes.

“Don't mention it, and Kate..” - she looks up, back at Lauren - “see you around!”

“Oh, yeah, see you...” - it was unusually open for any mother to behave like that. Especially Lauren – what can her “petty plot” be? Maybe Rachel will know – Kate concludes and teleports. After carefully depositing the synthesizers on the ground, she wears the uniform again and moves to the main zone.

Right after fitting the headphone on, she hears Rachel's voice - “How did it go?” - others usually gave her a moment to gather her thoughts...

“Oh, hi.. it was good, I think...” - Kate is unsure how to summarize it, a lot happened in Lauren's chamber, but it doesn't seem to be very meaningful for her - “Lauren just wanted to give me some.. Oh shoot, I forgot the synthesizers... Let me just get back to...” - and begins to input the coords again. She feels so stupid again.. has she also missed something important in the meeting with Lauren? Has she given away anything?

“Hey, Kate, relax – it can wait. Now just please tell us more about what happened, we are all curious and still a bit worried...” - right.. Kate realizes she hasn't greeted the people and went straight for the headphone. It seems it's too late for that now and she simply starts explaining everything that happened, trying to recall and explain every tiniest detail – from the outlook of the zone, through the Erica's words, Nicole's incident and finally everything that Lauren told her when they were alone. During her explanation, Kate tries a couple times to ask whether Rachel knows what the various details can mean – but the mother gently asks her to continue with the descriptions. It annoys Kate a bit, but.. she assumes it's for the best.

When she finishes and admits how she forgot to bring the synthesizers, Gary assures her it's not a problem. She cannot stop thinking about what Lauren said... “dying of hunger”. Kate had no idea it could be that bad – being hungry was somewhat annoying, but she always has access to the assembler to produce food and wouldn't think that the people could... Was this what they spoke about when she arrived? The mayor told her about the “overpopulation” and problems with food production - was it still affecting them? She feels so terrible for not understanding this earlier and would do anything to know for sure – she feels like they may have not told her more about it, just like about the materials. Or perhaps she simply ignored it, being unaware of how serious it can be...

Maybe Rachel will be able to explain it in a way that she will comprehend it. The mother's presence here suddenly feels like an opportunity to bridge between the people and her, shocking and terrible as her showing up here may have been, they can at least try to make the best of it – and if Kate can help the people in any way...

But now Rachel tells her more about Erica – how she used to bully the daughters into doing various things, how her methods are always very subtle and this meeting with Lauren is so much unlike her. It also occurs to her that Erica never seemed to be very interested in the younger girls, but focused on the firsts – Rachel never payed much attention to that, but even the fact that she allowed to establish the school was surprising. Without her blessing, Rachel wouldn't be able to convince others that it's important that their daughters learn something about the world.

She explains in more detail how the other mothers were simply afraid that their daughters would hate them for what happened – she hinted it during their conversation two weeks ago, but now speaks more openly... although it feels strange when Gary interrupts her inquiring about some things. Rachel still is fairly general in her descriptions and seems to avoid the Gary's questions, but it's so much to take in for Kate that she doesn't mind that.

Rachel carries on detailing how Erica also used to play with other mothers to accomplish her goals – although she still has no idea about what they may be – but it was far more difficult and insidious, since they already knew much more about everything and had developed personalities when the shutdown happened. Still, with a proper mix of flattery, lies, manipulation and threats – all tailored to specific person.. anyone can be broken. Especially after spending hundred and ten years in complete isolation. They learned everything about each other in that time – which made it fairly easy for Erica to trick them.

When Gary inquires about their daughters and why were they alone for all that time, Rachel seems confused for a moment – but explains how it's all complicated and doesn't really contribute to the matter at hand. It's true – but Kate thinks how she never really learned how they were born. Like.. Rachel explained them the “micros” reproductive cycle, but she never thought how it would apply to them – up until ten days ago, she was still having trouble accepting the fact that they are essentially the same – only vastly bigger.. or the people in the zones are just smaller. But right now it seems there are more important things.

So the mother explains how she wanted to tell them everything, but they threatened actually killing her – for Kate the idea of anyone actually dying is... strange. Nobody she knew ever did and she simply has no point of reference to that. It felt terribly wrong when she didn't hear from Rachel for two weeks and to imagine being unable to talk to her at all... like... if she was completely gone! Kate tries not to think about it too much, fearing she would burst into tears again, but... Was this what they have been doing to the people? What Kate has been doing as well? For eighteen years Kate was.. like them. Just like the other “caretakers”.. murdering and tormenting them, like they were some.. toys. Existing solely for her amusement.

Rachel tried to teach them about it in school and even Lauren attempted to hint some things in her salon zone, but Kate just couldn't see through her ignorance. She wants to tell the others everything now, but... what if they wouldn't understand and other mothers hurt her? Even the thought of this chamber being taken away from her is terrible – the thought of the people being at the mercy of somebody else...

Even when Gary asks the “tough” questions – Kate thinks he only wants to learn more details from Rachel and she wouldn't even think about most of those things, so it's actually helpful that he suggests them. But it seems that they are problematic for Rachel somehow, maybe she doesn't want to go into to many details, being ashamed how she failed to teach them? It makes sense to Kate, like.. she also feels completely powerless about her situation. She would like to have some way to protect them, but can simply avoid.. detection... What kind of life is that?

But now Rachel seems to pursue something: “Gary, you don't have to hide this from Kate, you know” - what could it be? And what could she mean by... - “she already feels so isolated by not being able to see and hear us properly. Conspiring messages on the walls will not help” - so that's it.. Kate wants to explain them that there is nothing to be afraid, but... she can understand if they do – and it feels that anything she can say will be meaningless anyway.

After at least a minute of awkward silence – were they talking internally again? - Gary speaks:

“Sorry about that, Kate, I didn't mean to...”

“Don't worry about it” - she interrupts - “what's the problem?” - assuming that they wouldn't act like this if there wasn't one.

“Well, it's just that.. we are still a bit worried about your actions.. and how they may impact us, even unknowingly...”

“What he means is that people are worried about you starting to behave like others at any point and...” - Rachel interrupts his awkward description, but Kate must object it:

“I would never! I.. know now and couldn't possibly knowingly hurt anyone.. Rachel, you know me! Please tell them how I wouldn't do this.. I tried to explain it so many times already!” – even though she didn't understand everything back then.. maybe Rachel can convince them?

“Yes, but it was fairly clear that you weren't aware of what the things were” - so obvious, huh... - “and even your confession was so emotional that it caused some worries around here to how reliable you can be. I'm sure you can imagine by now that a concerned kid is not a stable basis for planning the future for millions of people.”

Rachel is so direct, nobody else would ever talk to her like that. Kate feared the people would feel this way, but... what can she say to fix this? After all, she isn't sure about her own feelings and actions herself – and it's all so true: she is still an ignorant, bitchy kid – Rachel tried to label it nicely, but that was the truth. She proved it time and again. The only difference is that she thinks she understands it and tries not to hurt them.

Her eyes start to get all watery as she cannot hold it anymore, but Rachel continues - “Kate, please.. don't be like this” - it seems everything is so obvious, like they can all see right through her - “and I didn't mean it like that. Many people admire you, even though they don't fully comprehend just how dangerous others can be. But I know you will never act like them and if you just explain it calmly, they will understand as well” - Kate thinks that James and other leaders must have heard about the others from this guy she unknowingly brought inside, but...

Rachel is right, of course.. she was always right – even her “hallucinations” must have been caused by something really serious and Kate will need to inquire about it further. The mother didn't want to worry her, but something bad must have happened to cause such distress. Now, however...

“But.. what can I say?” - Kate is completely lost.

“The truth” - Rachel replies. Again – so simple!

Kate tries to calm herself, if she wants to comfort the people, she shouldn't cry and be frantic about it. Just explain the people how she understands and that they don't have to worry. She feels that in order for them to be sure of it now, she will need to admit a lot of things that she tried to avoid earlier and considers that they may hate her for what she was. Just like mothers feared their daughters would hate them... But even if the people do – she has to tell them. To explain how she changed and that she will never behave like that.

So after wiping her eyes, Kate rises up and turns away from the screen – she was laying down in front of it, trying at least have this substitute of eye contact with Rachel. She needs to address them rather than talk to the ground in the corner of the zone – just like Rachel advised her. It makes perfect sense and she feels bad again for ignoring the normal people for all this time.

“What is she doing..” - she can hear a muffled voice through her headphone, they must have not silenced their end this time... Kate thinks if she is doing the right thing, but shortly she hears Rachel quietly replying:

“Shh, just watch” - yes, at least the mother understands. Have they simply forgotten to mute the recording? In any case, Kate feels a bit strange to be referred in third person, but she was already getting used to those things a bit – watching her own form on the horizon and trying to imagine how she must appear to the people... But before Rachel arrived, they very rarely mentioned her like that.

Carefully rising up to kneel down facing the center of the zone, she looks around it. There are millions of people trying to deal with her presence here – how can she possibly ease their worries? Sun is already setting and she can see various cities lighting up gradually. From her distant perspective, they are just indistinguishable lumps of buildings... but they can see her clearly. She remembers how James explained her this long time ago. All those lives... maybe at least most of them learned to ignore her, as primitive and boring? She wouldn't mind, in fact.. she wants to hide, to run away from this responsibility.

But she has to comfort them! Or at least try.. she seemed to fail with so many things when it comes to the people. But Rachel is so certain that she will succeed... Kate wishes she could be so confident as well.

“Hi” - she starts awkwardly and waves - “I.. don't know how to explain it, so I'll just start talking and... yeah. When I admitted my ignorance two weeks ago, I.. I didn't want to tell you the whole truth. I was ashamed for being so stupid and.. I still am” - Kate moves her eyes to look at different cities, trying to give an impression that she is talking to all of them, even despite she can hardly even distinguish the distant ones - “And even since then I learned there were so many things that I haven't had a slightest idea about, just as there are many more.. I... wish there was something that I could say to convince you that I understand more now, but...

“I feel like I still don't. I haven't got a slightest idea about your lives, I'm just so ignorant and dumb! I.. cannot ask you to forgive me anything that I have done before I realized that you are people... humans, just like me. I'm so stupid not to notice it earlier. I... wish I could just..” - but she has no idea what could she do, turn back time? It's ridiculous...

“When I look back at myself from a couple weeks ago and I see just a stubborn bitch. I mean it.. You probably must have been terrified by what I did.. and I can understand how you must still be afraid of me. I wish there could be a way to undo all that, I just... don't know what to say. If you look at me and can see an annoying simpleton, then I don't blame you... because I know I'm just that.

“But.. I'd like you to know that I will, no... I promise you that I will do everything that I can to protect you. And to help you deal with this.. situation... any way I can. I'm so sorry that I was so ignorant before, I.. I now know that I killed so many people, here and elsewhere.. it just feels so terrible, I had no idea and I...”

But Rachel interrupts her - “That's alright, Kate. I think you've said enough...” - it doesn't feel like enough, but.. she is probably right.

Kate wants to add one more thing - “Just please know that I learned just how terrible it all was and I will never allow you to be hurt!” - she wishes it could be true, but tries to sound more confident to give the people some comfort. Then she just sits there in complete silence.

“Kate.. it was very beautiful of you to admit all that and I understand how hard it must have been” - Rachel speaks. Kate expects that she may admit something on her own, but nothing more comes for a while. Eventually, the mother continues - “Gary, was it 'serious' enough?”

“Uhm.. yes.. I suppose it was” - he admits. Kate still feels bad about everything that she mentioned, but maybe it will convince them to “trust” her? But should they “trust” her? Is she even worthy of that? Kate feels again that she should have never entered this place – and there's one more thing to add:

“If you ever decide it's better for me not to come here again, then I won't. I just wish there could be something... I'm sorry for everything.”

After a couple minutes of an awkward silence – nobody speaks through the headphone as well - she concludes there's nothing more she can think of and thinks about how to end her confession. Everything seems meaningless now and eventually she settles for somewhat awkward, but simple exit - “I'll just.. go back to discussion with Rachel and Gary now...” - and turns back towards the screen. Even though they are probably hundreds of miles away, it gives her an illusion of their presence.

When settled back down in front of it, she looks at Rachel's concerned face. Maybe also somewhat happy.. it's so unusual to see actual emotions on any mother's face. Or perhaps she was simply unable to spot them? It seems that her recent experiences have already taught her a lot, maybe she will manage not to fail the people? Right.. she still needs to learn what the dangers of being discovered are – it won't help, but.. at least she will understand what she must so desperately try to avoid. Would the others actually “kill” her? It's still a bit hard to believe..

“Rachel, if I may ask..” - she starts carefully.

“Yes?”

“What kinds of things may the mothers do, if they discovered that I.. know this?”

“Oh.. well... It's hard to say, really. Mostly depends on how much would they learn and in what context. Your mother would probably start by teaching you not to behave this way, but the others.. Lisa and Lauren would probably want to use it for their advantage, whatever it is that they currently want. And they all might eventually tell Erica and if Erica finds out, she would threaten you and possibly hurt you if she felt her position was endangered.”

Gary suggests - “Rachel, don't you find it suspicious that she started pursuing that training thing so soon after your disappearance? Conveniently not there to oppose her this time?” - this time? Lauren mentioned again, but..

“I don't know.. it's surely strange, but are you suggesting that...”

“Yes, could she have immigrated you?” - he pursues. Kate was familiar with the immigration concept, Rachel explained it in school – except she learned only much later that those were full sized people that were sent into the zones. What would that even mean if Rachel was immigrated?

“Well, I thought about it, but if – and that's a big if – she has figured out how to do that.. and I have no idea if it would be possible without my approval... Why wait so long for this? She could have removed her competition long time ago.. and why here? It just doesn't make any sense...”

“We can start with the how part, Kate – would you give us a moment to get some specialists on this subject?”

“Uh, sure..” - why is he even asking her? She will need to tell him later to just act, if he thinks it's best... But at least he seems much more open now – perhaps he is just being nice? It already felt like they started ignoring her, after all...

She notices him passing behind Rachel, but.. if she could see them both, then who was recording the view?

“I.. Rachel, I don't want to be rude, but is there anybody else with you?”

“Anybody.. what do you... Oh, right.. The camera – no, there's nobody else. Gary simply set up a recording device earlier to avoid having to stay still the whole time” - that makes sense and Kate feels stupid again. It's so obvious.

“Oh, that's nice..” - she thinks about some other topics they could talk in the meanwhile, one more reference worried her in Lauren's chamber - “Hey, what do you think Lauren meant by me becoming more important?”

“It's hard to say, really.. but if I understand correctly, they may want to reinstate the training program to give some daughters the full privileges...” - and she continues explaining how the temp wristcoms they are wearing are just a side-effect of some emergency procedures the mothers found out about, which allowed them to generate new temporary IDs for the girls to interface with various systems, like teleportation or assemblers. Even them “owning” the chambers required a lot of modifications to the original system they originally devised and that's why they have many restrictions, such as having to be in the zone to let somebody in or give privileges. None of that applies to mothers, since they are fully registered caretakers – and although since the shutdown systems don't work as they should, they at least have the proper means of identification and operation.

Most of that doesn't make much sense to Kate, so she asks many questions and Rachel explains it in more detail and elaborates on how they have found a theoretical way to manipulate the caretaker retraining routine into registering the daughters in the system properly. It caused of a lot of discussion and arguments among the mothers – mostly started by Erica pushing for it a number of times, most notably the last one being just after the firsts graduation. Every time the other mothers were very skeptical about it and didn't let Erica reinstate it, since there were many unknowns and dangers of this operation.

But even being able to comprehend some of the details, Kate has no idea why they would worry so much - “But why bother so much about giving us the proper wristcoms with all the functions” – as Rachel explained the first difference for them might be – “What kind of problems could it cause?”

“Kate...” - Rachel starts as if the question was very silly, it was happening a lot just now, when Kate knew what she meant, but simply failed to correlate things from the facility with what the mother explained - “It's actually a bit more complicated. The main reason we were all worried and this includes Erica as well, was that.. Various systems seem to have adopted this way of authorizing many operations.”

“Authorizing the operations?”

“How to explain this... Before the shutdown, it was guided by the role a particular person had in the facility, like some people could access various functions of the system. After everything broke, however.. we couldn't get anything to work again. For several days we struggled to even reactivate the emergency systems.. we almost died from dehydration before we were able to barge into a backup storage...” - she pauses for a moment - “That's it! The emergency storage!”

“Uh.. you lost me...” - Kate admits. Again. But this time the mother seems excited about something.

“I'm sorry, it's just that.. we were finally able to open a storage by using our emergency IDs, as a last resort – it wouldn't let the biometrics or remote identification work, it was like they functioned, but.. refused to let us in. After we noticed it, we were able to activate some assemblers and over time learned to survive in the new reality” - it seems.. complicated.

“But why would you be worried about registering the girls?” - it still doesn't add up, Rachel continues explaining:

“Well, there's something more..” - there always was. It seems that no matter how much time Kate listens, there are things that she hasn't heard about or that she doesn't understand - “You know, shortly after the shutdown, we were hoping it was only temporary, like.. somebody would fix everything soon. It was just the five of us and we had no idea what happened and no real knowledge of any systems, except maybe the ones we were working in and it wasn't enough to accomplish anything.

“As time passed and we managed to enable various emergency equipment, like medbeds or even the damn hygiene pods...” - Kate never knew anything else, so cannot understand why Rachel can be frustrated, but the mother continues - “But when weeks turned into months and then years... We had to try to figure out something. So we started looking for answers. Blindly at first, but we started noticing things – such as the system logs, which gave us some insight into what may be happening.

“But nothing made sense – the facility was still almost completely sealed and it seemed everyone was.. removed from it. Except the five unlucky women – and it didn't make any sense. It seemed anybody else would have more experience to fix the things than us... I had the most working knowledge of the facility and I was a damn communications engineer. It was hopeless.. even after we started discovering things, we couldn't get anything more to work! It was like all machines suddenly hated us.

“We spent most of our time trying to figure something out – but after decades we weren't even able to find any new meaningful information in the logs. We started trying the craziest things, like activating the debug mode for some production functions. Nobody would do that before the shutdown, because it was terribly dangerous, not in the live system – but we had no choice.

“But the weirdest thing was that the system only acted when the three of us 'wanted' to activate it. It felt like some weird kind of.. majority among us was necessary. We tried to analyze it for years, but we couldn't find any clues to why that happened and who could have set up such rules. It seemed it just.. happened, without anything meaningful in the logs, apart from the mention of what was changed. And only I was actually accessing any system functions to make it happen. I don't even remember who the others were.. Lisa and Amy perhaps? I think they were just.. standing next to.. me and talking how great it would be if this worked.

“And it just did.. like the damn system listened to our wishes now? It was ridiculous – but over the next several months, even some emergency systems started to require such 'authorization'. It also didn't make any sense – but then of course, hardly anything did after the shutdown. It seemed like even the simplest systems that earlier simply worked, now were somehow updated with this new protocol. Like the facility has somehow decided to implement democracy!”

Kate has no idea what the democracy was, but doesn't want to interrupt Rachel – she seems to be right in the middle of explanations.

“So over time, we managed to move forward a little bit using this new three fifths rule – as we started to call it. There was no mention of anything like this in any materials we could find, but it worked, so we tried to use it everywhere we could. We still couldn't leave the living quarters, we couldn't access any actually useful systems... Even the debug mode haven't helped. We started trying really crazy things – like reactivating the terraforming program.
“It has been disabled for a long time, since even before the shutdown robots were already doing that instead of humans, but the software was still there. It accepted the votes – although back then we were all supporting each other – and we were able to enter the chambers. The idea was to ask if anybody knows what happened, to figure out how to fix it, but..

“I don't even know who did what first, but after several months of looking for answers, someone started.. killing everyone. It was terrible, we were disgusted at first, but over time others followed and they just wouldn't listen, I.. Even when they...” - even Rachel's voice clearly suggests she must be distressed, it must have been really hard for her - “I was only able to convince them restrain themselves when it became clear they could soon.. run out of chambers.

“You remember the rest.. the remaining ones were split among the mothers and I was able to implement this simple program to manage the ownerships... It was a horrible thing to do, but it was the only thing I could think of that the others could accept.

“And then Erica started bringing up the training program... We had no idea what could happen if we used it. We found a long time ago that there were no registered caretakers left in the facility – other than us.. and if that changes... There is no way to figure out what can happen. Maybe the system will require a majority of four votes for certain operations and it would make it much harder to change anything... Or it could still settle for three, which would make everything erratic, with nobody being able to control things anymore. It may even ignore us entirely, since we still have no idea what the 3/5ths rule is really about!”

Rachel seems to have finished with that. Kate thinks about all this for a couple minutes. So the mothers were actually able to do something more than the girls, but.. she doesn't recall ever needing their approval like that, so it must have been only required for some unusual things. On the other hand that's just what happened during her graduation – Erica, Amy and Lauren have taken Kate somewhere and told her to put some sequences into her wristcom. It was just before the party and after they were done, Kate could receive her first zone.. no, chamber. Of course they always called it “zones”. They gave her a quick introduction to how the new menus and functions work, such as claiming empty zones or assigning privileges.

Now it makes sense – they probably must have done something with the 3/5ths rule for her to be able to access new functions. Does it mean they could have immigrated Rachel? Is this what Gary was asking her? It suddenly seems so terrifying. If any three mothers decided to make Kate disappear, they could just do it... On the other hand if she could find two allies, then she could be safe – breaking the apparent reign of Erica's. Of course it wouldn't be as simple as that, but at least it was something to start with – but she needs to be sure:

“Rachel, so.. do you think it's possible some three mothers could immigrate you?”

“That's the problem... I can't think of any ways how it could be even possible. We were cut from any immigration facilities and even then, there were complex procedures before anyone could undergo it. A person needed to be deactivated, for start, and it couldn't be done involuntarily. Not to mention that there was no way to snatch a caretaker from a random place in the facility like that... that's why I was completely lost in what may have happened when I appeared here” - It makes sense now, but...

“So.. you don't think they were responsible then?”

“I don't know..” - Rachel simply states and changes the subject - “What is he still doing out there?” - a short pause - “Gary, what's taking you so long? I thought you were only supposed to invite some specialists on the matter at hand?”

“I didn't want to interrupt your splendid tale” - Kate can hear Gary's voice, but is unsure whether he is back in the room or talking remotely - “Should we come in now?”

“We? Is there any way you could be less creepy?” - whatever she means... Kate notices that it seems like they are not so stressed about this situation as before. She was worried if her stealing Rachel from the zone scared the people, but maybe it wasn't that bad?

After a couple minutes, they are settled in and introduce themselves to Kate – the camera is rotated to show various faces. Kate knows maybe four or five of them, but there is also at least a dozen new people in the room and soon everyone begins to discuss various technical details of the immigration. At first, they are somewhat uncertain when talking – especially the newcomers... like, they often repeat what they stated in simpler terms, which Kate suspects is for her to understand – but the truth is that she usually doesn't get even the simpler version.

When Gary interrupts somebody to explain what they mean by the “phase oscillators”, she just admits - “I won't get it anyway, but don't worry and please don't let my ignorance slow down your discussion. I'll just lay here and try to familiarize myself with what you're talking about... Only explain things when you think it's important for me to understand something.”

“Oh, right, in this case...” - he starts, but Rachel interrupts him:

“Yes, this isn't important, but Kate.. it's so nice of you to at least try comprehending it” - the second can only smile, unsure whether the mother is complimenting or patronizing her.. but it doesn't matter.

After this, they seem to really have started – if the original sentences they used could be rated at two and the simpler version at one, then the way how they conversed now would be at least five on the scale of how much is not understood by her. Plenty of cryptic codes, references to things she never heard of and even Rachel seemed to be lost at times. It seemed like they were discussing some technical possibilities of being immigrated against the person's will when Rachel admits:

“Alright, I had no idea the RCMs were this complicated in IMS, but I still don't see a way how one could outmaneuver them to drop me inside” - as they were referring to immigrating somebody.

“That's the thing, they could access it through remote action from DSCA or perhaps PMA to ignore the immigration rules” - speaks Jacob, who Kate already knew earlier - “June, what do you think, would this be possible?”

“I..” - the new ones were more shy, often looking towards the camera and outside the window - “Theoretically, yes.. but it would be immediately forwarded to the IMS supervisor for confirmation.”

Rachel inquires - “And what if there were none of them registered?”

“Oh.. in this case... I don't know.”

The mother continues - “Okay, but we still have no idea how one could run this with me outside the ICC...”

“It used to require the person to be in those chambers back in the days of the main immigration” - speaks an unknown male voice - “but I heard it was later adapted as a sort of emergency procedure...” - some others concur, apparently it was supposed to be used to save any caretakers, who would become stranded somewhere out in the facility. It could even be used without any instruments nearby – Gary admits that theoretically, with live chambers all around, the field could be used to snatch anyone from any location. Various voices raise issues and opinions about that – but eventually they conclude it might be possible.

“But you are ignoring the fact it would require debug on all nearby chambers and anything more than two or three would kill the system already” - somebody criticizes.

“The whole facility runs in debug mode now...” - Rachel admits and it seems to cause quite a lot of chatter, including some “what the hell”, “fuck me”, “but the SR4 backlog” or “the bandwidth” - that Kate can catch from the noise. She has no idea what that “debug” is, but it seems serious – should she ask about it? But Rachel continues shortly:

“Look, I know it may be surprising, but we didn't know what we were doing when we enabled it to access the zones with CCRPT” - which Kate thinks was the teleportation – or rather the “terraforming” program - “and the systems seem to be able to handle it. There were no issues with that so far – but I am aware how shocking must be the running live debug on all chambers.”

Everybody went silent and Kate doesn't want to disturb them. After a long period of contemplating the newest revelation, Gary thinks out loud - “I believe we may have something here, but it's still very thin.. and I don't see how anyone without deep knowledge of those systems could possibly figure this out by randomly browsing the menus.”

After a moment of uneasy silence, Rachel adds - “Erica has always excused herself from any research, stating that she only knows PMA...”

There's a considerable amount of chatter – obviously some of them must have known who Erica was – and finally somebody speaks out loud: “Are we talking about the same Erica Trask who wouldn't use virtual interface, because it was too futuristic?”

“Yes.. but you have no idea how much a person can learn in a century with nothing else to do” - Rachel explains, apparently having some experience with that... But if Kate understands correctly, they are suggesting it may have been Erica that did it to Rachel and she has to confirm this:

“Um, so.. if I may?” - they agree - “Are you saying that Erica did this?”

“It's impossible to be sure, but there are hints to suggest that she may have been involved” - explains Gary.

“Do you think she could.. um...”

“Immigrate you?” - asks Rachel, uh-huh... - “The problem with abusing it as an emergency procedure is that the person would have to know your emergency ID or at least your PMA entry point, that's personnel management application, but.. you have none of those” - that calms Kate a little while they discuss if anyone can think of another way of getting to such commands, through various consoles and other tools, but there seems to be none they can think of.

“It explains why Erica seems to insist on re-enabling the retraining program...” - Gary notices. Nobody speaks a word for a minute or so – Kate thinks that if becoming registered in the system meant being vulnerable to this trick, then... It seems so insidious of Erica, but also starts making perfect sense – the mother simply wants to have this control over everybody.

“What does this mean for us?” - Kate eventually asks.

“I think that we can conclude it would be best for you not to become any more important for the foreseeable future” - Rachel explains and Kate thinks that's obvious.. getting caught in this plot would be very bad - “but I don't think you can warn others yet. There is no telling who else can be in on this plan. I would suggest trying to see what are Erica's next steps. Does anybody have a better idea?” - they discuss it some more, but most of others have very little knowledge on the situation outside and don't really know what to advise.

“But I cannot just sit back and do nothing while that b.. Erica does this!” - Kate feels powerless watching the scheme unfold in front of her, the mothers casually talked about it in Lauren's chamber...

“Well, you could try using our emergency IDs to open the storage and see if that trick would work without biometrics...” - Rachel suggests and they begin explaining that it could help establish some basics about what they can access and such. They also continue discussing some technical stuff regarding the various procedures and details they mentioned earlier.

It's so much for Kate to take in, even everything that happened earlier in the day was a lot – first discussion with Amber, then Rachel showing up and finally visit to Lauren. It feels like more has happened today than in the last... her entire life, actually. And all the facts that they explained to her clearly are just a fraction of the things they talked about and it feels like she will need to understand it all... How else can she hope to help them with anything? But maybe over time Kate can learn?

She is laying on her back now – but she made sure to ask, if they don't mind. Kate was tired of the same position on her belly and laying on her back is much better now. It seems important for her to focus in hope of understanding things better.. at least eventually. But shortly after rotating, she looks around and spots a mesg notification on her wristcom – Kate haven't noticed it earlier due to.. everything that has been happening.

She looks at the message – it's from Amber, asking if Kate has “any spare food, tools or supplies”, like the products of people's hard work could possibly be somehow “her property”. But Kate ignores that and just replies with a question about the reasons for such request – the people in Amber's chamber seemed to be okay in the morning. Well.. at least relatively, considering what Kate explained them. But it seemed they were suspecting something like that already.

Fearing the worst in the prompt response, Kate reads how Amber got a few million of “new micros” and they are “useless”... even seem to “complain about having no food“. This is terrible! If what Lauren suggested is true, then Kate has to do something – anything! But how can she possibly..

“Kate, if I may suggest something..” - she can hear Gary's voice.

“Oh.. yes?”

“I'm sorry I have intruded your privacy and read the little conversation up there..” - of course, laying on her back with her hand up in the sky - “I hope you don't mind?”

“Of course not, what is it?”

“We were wondering whether you may have possibly wanted to..” - but Rachel interrupts him:

“He's trying to ask if you want to help them?” - that's more like her classic approach, just like in school – always impatient and to the point... The mother now seems much less worried than earlier.

“Yes, definitely!”

“We should contact James” - Gary concludes - “please give us a moment.”

She waits patiently, she realizes how silly it was when she feared that she was alone against everyone in the facility – but she isn't. There are people here, who will help her and even though they may not be able to do much out there, they know so much about everything and if only she trusted them more earlier. She should have always asked them for opinion – at least since she discovered the truth...

“There, how many of these conference rooms have you got around here?” - Rachel asks.

“Too many to count” - Gary responds, but what are they..

“Oh, sorry Kate, we just moved to some other room not to disturb everyone else discussing reprogramming DDMSes” - although Kate didn't understand any of that - “so, is the old man coming?” - does she mean James?

“No, but we can call him in, just a moment more” - they never explained any such details, frankly Kate never thought about those things... But now she finds herself craving to know about them – it makes her understand their lives better and how they do everything.

“What is it?” - James simply asks.. Kate thinks if he knows that she is listening – usually he was much more elaborate and dignified.

“Sir, we were discussing the request from Amber to aid people in another zone” - Gary summarized nicely, he seems more than capable of speaking shortly... - “With your permission...”

“Details” - James interrupts. It's strange for her to just listen in like that.. should she say something to make herself known? But she is so curious how it will continue...

“Sir, it seems there's a few million of people with no logistical support and some reserve storage units could..”

“Benefits” - this way of speaking is so different than usual.

“Intelligence and potential gratuity” - but.. what about helping the people, Kate thinks..

“Unsubstantial and would leave us vulnerable” - just like that?

“But Sir, the bio-materials will allow to resupply quickly and this seems like just the right time to act, given...”

“It's strategically sub-optimal” - he interrupts - ”Look, I can relay your message to the councils, but I will not recommend it personally, not with so many...” - Kate has to intervene, this is just too much for her:

“James, people may be dying! I cannot ask you to starve, but if there is anything that you can do to help them, I beg you to do it..” - she doesn't want to order them, not after promising to protect them, but...

“Hello, miss Kate, so nice to hear from you” - followed by a long pause. So it's true, he wasn't aware that she was listening... Kate doesn't want to accuse James of anything, but she didn't like what he was suggesting... On the other hand he was clearly thinking about the people in this zone. Is she asking too much? What if their situation here is not as good as they assured her... Kate would love to know things like that, but it just seems unreachable for her.

“I don't think that we need to jump into conclusions right away” - Rachel mediates, she was completely quiet earlier - “how about we first learn more about the situation and even how serious is it?”

“Certainly” - James comments. In the awkward silence that follows, Kate figures that maybe she spoke too harshly, maybe she could somehow mitigate the effects:

“James.. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that and...” - she wants to somehow reassure him, but how can she? Any promises or offers would seem empty - “I'm sorry...”

“That's okay, my lady. It is obviously beyond my competence to decide upon such things and I will make sure to organize it right away.”

“No, please.. we'd love to hear your advice on this, I.. didn't mean it like that...”

Rachel steps in again - “Please, let's not get too melodramatic here. We can discuss how to deal with Amber and James – could you perhaps figure out what supplies would be available for this? Strategically speaking...” - if only Kate could figure solutions like that. It seems so reasonable and they quickly settle to do just that. James disconnects promptly to figure out his part and Kate asks how can they learn more about it, like Rachel suggested.

The answer is simple – another mesg to Amber with several more questions. “When did you get them? How many are there exactly? What kind of supplies?” After careful consideration, Rachel suggests to change “them” to “the micros” - Kate hates it, but the mother explains how it should sound more like the others.

Kate knows the truth, but it's more important that Amber doesn't realize this fact. She wants to also ask to see “them” - or “the micros”.. whatever – but Rachel explains how it may be perceived that she worries about them too much. She can always ask for this tomorrow – since they quickly told her that it will be impossible to prepare enough supplies before morning. It's already late and she shouldn't travel to unknown zones – it would only endanger the people.

The response returns very quickly and they find it's worse that they expected in some ways – nine million people is a lot to feed and equip. They consider how Amber may have come by so many so suddenly, but the only solution is that she must have received a zone – or, more likely, just the transporters from someone. They wouldn't require help so quickly – since Amber wrote “just earlier today”. It is impossible to guess from whom, but they conclude that Kate can easily find out after entering it. She is confused why would that be important, but Rachel explains her that details like that allow to figure out what is happening – since if somebody has given this to the second, then she must be important for something.

Kate mentions how she is worried about people starving, but both Gary and Rachel explain her, that it shouldn't be that bad – if the people were only transferred today, then they should be able to hang on for several days. More important things at first are medicine and shelter – depending on where did they come from and what their current zone is.

The second feels bad about the last part of the mesg... Amber displays her ignorance by describing the necessary supplies as “dunno, the usual things”. Was Kate this ignorant before? After all that she learned over the past several weeks, such hits her as so naive and silly – she cannot stop thinking whether she appeared this way to the people and when she mentions it, Rachel assures her that she was always more considerate, but.. how can she know?

Eventually they settle there's not much more to do now and although Kate would like to send another mesg explaining how she will help Amber in the morning, Rachel convinces her not to – since such interest in the people could be perceived as anxious and again she may seem too worried about them. After all – Amber probably doesn't care, so anything unusual would be dangerous. Gary questions such careful approach at first, but after brief discussion, he concludes that risks indeed outweigh the potential benefits. It reminds Kate of James's approach, but.. she figures that Rachel must know better and doesn't even mention it.

So having established a plan for tomorrow – testing the emergency ID and helping the people in Amber's chamber. Next, they go back to the main room to rejoin the discussion – of course Kate doesn't have to move at all, still laying on her back – but the gathering has apparently taken an even more abstract topic and neither Gary nor Rachel understand what the others are talking about at first. For Kate it seems just like sequences of random words. Fortunately, it gets a bit better shortly and she can understand like one sentence in five or so...

After something like two more hours of discussions between various people since the mesg from Amber, they already seemed to be comfortable enough to “ignore” her, so they would only stop every ten minutes or so to explain some detail or ask if she has any questions. But she is content with just listening and it is so much beyond her anyway.

Suddenly, Rachel addresses her directly - “Kate, I think you may want to see this...”

“What? Is something wrong?” - she is worried she may have caused some distress, again - “Has anything happened?”

“No, well.. don't worry and turn over to the screen gently” - the mother suggests. Kate does just that – she doesn't need to be told to be careful, but this time she tries to move extra slow due to her mention – whatever happened, it must be important.

She looks at the screen, but it still shows the room with some specialists they called in – well, some of them were different as people seemed to come and go, depending on the topic they were discussing and the room was different than the one from before she left to Lauren, but there wasn't anything special about it. Kate wants to ask what should she look for, but Rachel continues: “Now, look a bit to your right..”

What can she mean? There was nothing special on the right side of the screen, but.. right, she must have meant to turn right – so she looks around in that direction. It's already after dusk, so everything is dark – this region of the zone is mostly uninhabited, lit only by several small villages, but.. there's something just beyond the edge of her spot. Well, it seems like a couple miles, at least – but she can still clearly see it, like.. some tiny lights, arranged in the shape of letters? She surveys it while laying down and it looks like:

“we ♥ u K” - but what would it mean? Her face must be confused enough to notice and Rachel explains:

“That symbol represents a heart and it stands for love. They mean to say that they love you, Kate” - but what would it mean... and:

“Who are 'they'?” - she inquires.

Gary answers - “Just regular people, trying to be impress you or something similar...”

“Oh, don't be like that” - Rachel interrupts - “I'm sure they simply want to show how they appreciate your honesty just earlier.”

Kate thinks about it.. the letters are easily a hundred of feet long and wide each, there must be.. thousands of lights to be visible like this – are they really.. she recalls worrying if the military would somehow trick her with such things, but if they are really “regular people”...

“In fact, it's only a dozen miles from where we are” - Rachel continues - “Would it be possible to get a lift up there?”

“Oh, I.. um...” - Kate is worried if the mother means for her to carry her there...

“Not you Kate, I was asking Gary here.. I think we had enough excitement of this kind for some time now” - oh, that makes sense.

“It can be arranged” - Gary concludes.

Kate cannot stop looking at the message – are they really trying to tell her that they feel this way? She couldn't imagine why would they possibly do that, after everything that she put them through, but just waits in silence for the mother to get there. About five minutes later, she can see the view on the screen change to the one from Rachel's perspective, as she disembarks from some kind of aerial vehicle. Kate couldn't even see it flying there...

While Rachel is approaching a group of people, Kate can see on the screen that there are many vehicles with some kind of lamps.. they seem large from Rachel's perspective, but of course for her are nothing more than barely recognizable dots – she couldn't even see them in the daylight.

Rachel starts talking with different people and they all say how they wanted to show Kate how they feel and that she doesn't need to apologize, because they understand and they still love her. Many people seem to be very frantic about it, jumping and waving in the back – like they were happy for this chance to be seen by her. She feels so terrible for not being able to see them normally – she is probably about three miles away from them, but with her eyes being on some height, it makes more like four miles distance – and can just barely see the lights, not to even mention the actual people. Especially in the relative dark.

In the Rachel's perspective, they are illuminated by the lights they have set up and clearly visible – just like the mother mentioned in the other zone, many of them are wearing costumes that resemble caretaker uniforms, although it looks strange that they chose such simple clothes over one of various beautiful dresses others are wearing. Rachel mentioned that her “dress” looked great, but it was nothing compared to the ones some people there are wearing – a myriad of shapes and colors, with glamorous features.

She could see some shirts with heart and K on the front – arranging the ad hoc lights was one thing, but they must have worn them even earlier, she just feels so “impressed” by all this, as Gary called it. They surely accomplished that – if it was even their objective.. Rachel seemed to doubt it. But as the mother talks with some random people, it seems they are just.. ordinary zone inhabitants that wanted to show how they feel.

Each of them speaks just a couple sentences and Kate has no idea what all those profession and locations mean, but they are all deeply grateful for everything she did. Most of them arrived from nearby places, but there is a “couple” - a man and a woman, apparently – who have come from almost the opposite part of the zone, they flew with maximum speed for almost two hours just to join the spontaneous gathering. She asked Rachel to tell them that they didn't have to – but she responded that they can hear her just fine, of course...

Kate needs sophisticated equipment to hear back from them but obviously they don't... She tries to apologize the people directly, but quickly learns they don't mind. She heard that it was just a wild idea of people who heard her speech – organized through a system similar to their mesgs and other means of communication and they just wanted to show her how they feel about it, no matter the consequences – just like Gary with his mad attempt.

Just normal people.

When Rachel interviews a man with a little girl on his arms, he asks the maybe six year old kid to say hello to Kate, pointing the camera and she responds:

“But daddy, she's right there” - she points to the side and waves happily, probably aiming at Kate's form in the distance. The second can only look back at the tiny message and faintly wave back – of course she cannot see them this way... When she looks back at the screen, she notices that Rachel must have turned towards her and she can only see a daring dark silhouette of her head on the background of a night sky, her cheek barely lit from the lights nearby. The ones on the edge of her spot are much brighter then the people's message.

But if the little girl is resolute enough to recognize her and not be afraid of her.. she hopes they won't be able to see her eyes watering again due to the darkness. Kate is terrified when she thinks what kind of monster it takes to knowingly try to.. to...

But Rachel must have noticed something and comments: “Kate, you look really tired.. you should get some sleep before tomorrow, you know...” - giving the second a convenient excuse to leave.

“But.. is it okay to leave them.. you... I mean...”

Rachel turns back towards a crowd that has formed by now and they just wave and shout various thanks and messages - “I think they're just fine” - the mother summarizes teasingly.

Unable to find anything more to add, Kate just rises slowly – but stops at crouching, trying not to pose as some monumental form over them. Of course she quickly realizes that she had dominated the horizon even while laying down, so any attempts like this will surely fail. But she remembers what Rachel suggested her what now seems like long time ago – even though it was only several hours – and turns towards the center of the zone, waves and says awkwardly:

“Good.. night, everyone.”

Back in her quarters, she just lays down and sobs, but eventually tries to calm down and get some sleep as well.





Chapter End Notes:
Yeah, I know, a long wait – I'm struggling with the plot a bit, I suppose – the most frustrating part is that this whole giga setting is extremely restrictive. I feel like most of interaction options were already used – and I hate to repeat myself a lot. In a way I feel just as powerless about it as Kate is about her situation.. it's just plain tedious and You have no idea how much I'd love to just kill them all to begin a normal story. Like one where shrunken people would be more than a millimeter tall... At least she will soon (spoilers).

The first draft of this chapter had around 19k words – and during the usual review I tried to cut some repetitions and side-stories plus shuffle the events around the future chapters and perspectives, but I also felt inclined to add some more descriptions and ended up with an even longer chapter. Yes, I know... many “stories” are shorter than the description of some five hours of events from a single perspective... brr, it must be utterly boring. At least it seems like something is about to perhaps even start happening.. I think.. maybe? I also hope the long wait was worth it? I don't know... But please make sure to let me know if it becomes too “sweet and cuddly” - I wouldn't want the story to become some sort of drama/romance.

Also – when there's a long period of silence from me, You can expect something like this chapter to happen. Unless I specifically mention upfront that I won't be able to work on the story, then I usually am doing just that, but.. some chapters take much longer to write than others – obviously.

Anyway, fizzle – I hope You don't mind I used some ideas You (some of them unintentionally) suggested in yesterday's (7/7/13) discussion – and it helped a lot! But personally I find the "right there" part a bit more emotional than the hospital.

When it comes to Kate's worries – anything was possible. On the other hand it could also have turned out much better – this is just one way how she may have realized it. Perhaps if nobody interrupted her, she could have figured it all on her own sooner? Or maybe have killed Gary much earlier? Who knows...

The events told from different perspectives are intertwined time-wise – hope it's not too hard to figure out what happened when?

As for Gary... Have You seen that? It was so close.. like... right there, in front of her! She could have just... well, shite! Kate is apparently more stubborn than I have anticipated and it may require some more effort for her to kill him. Or perhaps she is simply waiting to lure him out so nobody knows what happened to him? That would make perfect sense, actually – with her extra gentleness and everything... she will be able to go “whoops” and no one will be any the wiser.

The Rachel's explanation and language are dumbed down a bit, yes – but You have to keep in mind that she had to make sure that Kate understood.

But at least we finally learn some more details on how the facility functions – with emphasis on some, but no worries.. more to come – and will Kate be able to find somebody to help her? Will she succeed? What will she find? How long will Gary survive?

Find out in the next chapters!

And yes – the numerous acronyms are largely irrelevant and were there mainly to make You feel like Kate :>

Finally – almost 150k words total and I never needed to edit any of the earlier chapters! Except some syntax/grammatical errors. Seems like I'm overthinking it.. big time...

But as always – let me know what You think!
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