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OCTOBER 12, 2013
(12:31 P.M./CST)

"We interrupt our regular programming to bring you this emergency bulletin!" exclaimed Carlos Mendoza of KOWZ-TV: "Here, with the breaking details, is Nina Hei-Yu."

The camera's eye view instantly switched to a lovely young woman of Chinese heritage holding a microphone.

"Thank you, Carlos. These are the details, as we know them, right now. The first-ever meeting between the LSU Tigers and the TTMC Pumas was about to get underway, with the customary coin toss by the referee, when a series of massive vibrations struck the football stadium. As if this part of West Texas was suddenly experiencing an earthquake!"

"It was no earthquake, though. What everyone present had been feeling turned out to be the footsteps of a hundred-foot tall giant! A naked, female red-headed giant, at that!!"

"To everyone's further amazement, this giantess announced that she was looking for someone. Former Puma quarterback Aloysius 'Biff' Morgan! This quickly led various people in the stands to recognize her as former art teacher Dorothy Sloan. Fired from TTMC, just last year, over a paternity suit she and Biff Morgan had fabricated against an innocent third party."

"Initial shock soon turned to blind panic, however, when Ms. Sloan approached the side of the stadium where the TTMC alumni watch the school's football games in private. When she smashed her humongous right fist through the tinted glass of the viewing box, the outdoor witnesses screamed and fled, en masse!"

Nina paused while she put her right finger to the corresponding ear.

"Excuse me, Carlos. But, I'm informed that KOWZ News Chopper 8 has just caught up to Ms. Sloan! Here are the first live video pictures of the giantess."

What most people saw was a naked redhead whose anatomy, below the neck, had been partially obscured by electronic pixels. What she carried in her left hand, however, was all too visible.

It was Biff Morgan screaming for help.

Unfortunately, for him, there was no one in a position to do so. Oh, there had been some token resistance by the majority of the campus security guards at the stadium! But, their .38 caliber bullets had only bounced off her skin without causing the slightest harm. In fact, they had actually seemed to tickle her a little bit!!

Then, they reached a sign that clearly read:

Magic City, TX"

Whereupon, Dorothy Sloan looked down at the tear-stricken Biff.

"I told you last year, after our separated trials, that I'd never leave this town without getting even with you, Biff. And, I intend to keep that promise. Down the hatch!"

Whereupon, Biff found himself thrown into her mouth...and swallowed whole.

This image was captured by the video camcorder aboard News Helicopter 8. And, KOWZ-TV would not only repeat it throughout the rest of that day. But, it would be picked up, via computer printer, by every major newspaper around the country (and the world).

Unfortunately, for Hank McGee, ground-based camera crews would also show the collateral devastation wrought by Dorothy's colossal bare feet. Including the total collapse of the TTMC Physics Building (where the Neuro-Stimulative Regeneratron had been stored).

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