I thrashed against this girl's shoe for what seemed to be an eternity. With every ounce of my strength I tried to tear myself away but the small amount of force just the tip of her right foot could produce was enough to pin me in place. As if this couldn't be worse, I was forced to listen to them talk about beer. Leave it to people like them to turn beer into something artsy and alternative.

My attempt to scream bloody murder at this girl as she finally decided on something to drink was cut off by another push from her shoe that shot the air out from my body. The pressure eased and I took in deep gasps of breath as the shoe pulled away. I collapsed back to the ground, resting my hands and body against the cool metal foot rest. As I moved to lean against it though, I had to prevent myself from being immediately repulsed by just how many feet had probably rested on this.

Now having a moment to myself I tried to comprehend my situation. Somehow this girl that was standing in front of me, had shrank me to just a few inches tall. Was it really just because I had 'taken her seat,' because that seemed to be completely ridiculous. I let my eyes scale up her enormous form, from the brown leather shoes, up the tight blue jeans, and to a t-shirt I couldn't make out that was covered in a sleeveless denim vest. Somewhere far above me, I could just make out her chin, and her bright red lips. She didn't look like one of those girls who would wear corsets and thigh high boots, and so I doubt she did this just to torture me. She just didn't seem to be the S&M type.

So why the hell would she do this?

The metal bar I was leaning against suddenly vibrated and shook. I turned to see the smooth underside of her leather shoe. I found myself breathing a sigh of relief as there were no suspicious red stains on the black underside, just the standard amount of dirt and dust you'd expect. Suddenly I heard her voice cut through the noise again, “Thanks.”

Her foot backed away, and landed on the hard concrete in front of the bar. I gulped as I felt a perceptible shake as her foot landed squarely on the floor, and I actually stumbled away. My body landed awkwardly with my ass and hands on the floor. As more of my body was touching the floor I began to feel the near continuous shaking in the ground, and my head swiveled about as I realized that with every step a person made, the ground quaked just a little. None of them realized it, but the whole floor of this bar as solid as it appeared, seemed to be constantly shaking to me.

A massive amount of liquid crashed down in front of the foot rest, and I was splashed with a sticky, black, and very sweet smelling liquid. I quickly realized it was whatever fancy beer this girl had ordered, and it brought me back to more pressing matters. As fast as I could I scrambled to a standing position, and tried to decide: left or right? Either way, I realized, was not in front of this crazy girl.

“Oops,” I heard her booming but still clearly feminine voice say. I craned my head up as she was already leaning down. Her whole body merely bent at the waist, as her long pale arm extended toward me. I could see in her other hand, she held walked looked to be a wine glass but it was filled to the brim with some sort of dark beer, like a Guinness I figured. Still, knowing that the empty hand was reaching for me, I bolted as quickly as I could to my left but after only a few steps my whole body came to a complete halt.

I looked down to find my arms pinned to my sides by the impossibly large fingers of this girl. As I gazed back up at her long arm, and took in her enormous finger, I got the distinct impression that this girl wouldn't be described in a way other than slender, or even spindly. Yet, I realized, her pinky finger was probably as thick as my thigh. With my arms pinned, I couldn't even thrash against her shining red fingernails, or try to pry her massive fingers from my frame. As I struggled against her grip though, I couldn't help but begin to acknowledge that it probably would have been futile anyway.

“Aw,” I heard her say, and I understood that while to me her voice was like a stadium announcer to everybody else it was just a whisper, “Did you really think you could get away?”

I took a deep breath, as deep as I could with her fingers pressing against my body, and shouted while praying someone would hear me, “You fucking bitch! You can't do this!”

She just giggled.
That's the only way she even acknowledged me yelling at her, was to laugh. I had a deep voice, I knew I could stop people from just the way I spoke. At work, when I was in college, on the football field in high school, people had always listened to me. She just laughed.

The girl started rising back to her full height, though she stopped next to her bag as she did. I watched as her fingers deftly spread the off-white of the tote bag open, and suddenly the pressure around me was released. I was suddenly dropping for what seemed to be dozens of feet before I hit into the side and bounced down into a few objects, and then some other structures before I was somehow resting at the bottom of her enormous bag.

As I lay on the somewhat dirty floor of the tote that she used as her purse, the objects and structures I had slammed into began to take on familiar shapes. There were several various make-up applicators laying down here, some of which looked fairly heavy to me. A bag of tissues, a set of keys, loose change, petty cash, a small bag of tobacco for rolling cigarettes, a lighter, and I shuddered as I caught sight of even a few wrapped tampons. Finally, I spotted what looked like her wallet, and it lay open on its side. I slowly pulled myself up deciding that at least I might be able to get some information on my captor.

It was when I started moving toward the wallet though that everything started moving. My head immediately shot upward to watch her hand grip the straps of the bag from the bar hook. With ease the enormous hand lifted the tote containing me and seemed to carry it high into the heavens. Everything begin to slide and turn as my whole world spun about.

Immediately I noticed her wallet begin to fall toward its side, the side I was standing beneath. I turned and scrambled, grabbing at the thick burlap-like material to try and vault myself away. My body crashed into the far side of the bag as the wallet crashed behind me, just barely missing my foot. There was one more massive shift as she slung the bag on to her shoulder. The bag slammed me into her hip bone and I found myself reeling from the shock of hitting her but not actually injured. Then she began to walk, and everything continued to tumble around while I battered again and again into her sharp hips.

As she maneuvered her way through the crowded bar, I found myself cursing her constantly. With rage boiling inside me, and the realization that I was completely trapped inside of her purse with no one even able to hear me, I just started shouting, “You bitch! You didn't even want that seat! Why the hell are you doing this to me? What the fuck did I even do to you?”

I had run out of steam by the time she stopped moving, and I noticed the bag open up. Her enormous face dominated my view, and I glared up at her but I noticed her eyes didn't even search for me. Her gigantic brown eyes slid right over me and then her hand stretched down and grabbed at a few quarters that littered the ground around me. She then picked them up and her hand retreated, the bag closed.

I slumped over, did she not even care?