If you were to take one look at me, you might ask yourself "how on earth did you come to get stuck in the giant woman's hair?". It's a fair question. Typically most people run the opposite direction when faced with mortal peril, our fight or flight response kicks in and tells us it's time to hit the bricks. Let me tell you, dear reader, I had absolutely every desire to run away, but when a giant woman falls backward into the office high rise you work in, where exactly are you supposed to go?

Let me start from the beginning.

It was around noon when the office first shook. It took a moment for people to recognize what was happening, that a tremor was shaking the entire building, but once the danger was realized, everyone inside reacted with a predictable level of calm and orderly restraint. That is to say, it was absolute chaos. Within that collective understanding of the situation, everybody up here on the 13th floor made a beeline for the stairs and elevators. The folks on the floors above and below had the same idea, cramming themselves into whatever exits they could find in the vain hopes of making it back to solid ground.

I was finishing up lunch, leaving my desk to join the herd when the shaking seemed to stop as quickly as it came. While most were too busy with their egress to notice, a few astute individuals came to a stop as the scene settled. The panic only calmed for a moment when a second tremor spiked, more intense than the last, rattling the windows as it rippled through the building. The chaos resumed, and as it did, the source of the tremors stepped into view.

Naked as the day she was born, the tremendous woman strode out into the street, her blonde hair catching the mid day sun like the finest golden silk. I was awestruck, first by her beauty and then by the fact that, 13 floors up, this woman outside the window was still somehow taller than me. She settled in place, the earth straining beneath her as she came to stop and surveyed the skyline, unaware of the audience that gathered in the windows behind her.

The sightseeing did not last long, however, as something down on street level began to cause quite a stir, at least, that's what it looked like from up here. The giant woman began to squirm, as though something below was tickling her toes, causing her to lose her footing. Without warning, she stumbled backwards and made contact with the building, her head and back smashing into the glistening glass facade with little resistance. Thankfully, the structure managed to support her incalculable weight, and the disoriented giant used the high rise to regain her balance, but not before that beautiful blonde hair swept across the office. 

In an instant, the strands of gorgeous golden hair lashed themselves around my legs, dragging myself and a few colleagues away as the giant stood up from her stumble. I expected certain doom as we were pulled through the threshold of the broken window and out into the open air, but the bonds held tight and we swung softly into the pillowy bounce of her hair. It smelled nice, the tangle felt warm and inviting, and although we were dozens of storeys above solid ground, there was a bizarrely calming sensation to the whole experience.

From on high, I watched the giant tiptoe through the traffic that had agitated her so, doing her best to avoid stepping on anything or anyone, completely ignorant to the passengers she had accidentally just picked up. I wasn't certain how we were going to get ourselves out of this predicament, but as the beautiful giant sauntered off with us along for the ride, the damaged high rise fading behind her with each step, I didn't mind so much. Anything seemed preferable to a another day at the office.