With a bunch of college housemates, everybody was on their own schedule. Even doing things like going to eat together or hanging out together were difficult because how often someone was at home depended on their class and work times.

Back when Sam was living with us, our schedules never matched so, despite being friends, we hardly saw each other at the apartments. As for Lori, my big sister’s schedule was unpredictable. Sometimes she was up early and sometimes was out late. She said she was hoping to get a more consistent schedule soon, but she had said that a year ago.

That was why our apartment had developed a small custom. Whenever one of us chose to have a meal outside of our rooms, the rest of us would join in. Sometimes, Lori would bring out some board games or even card games and we’d play along while eating too. It was a good way for us to just hang out on the busy weekdays.

Our plan was to invite Alice along with us too, but, due to my shrinking, there was a small hiccup that we didn’t originally think of…

“Crap… I forgot to add the potatoes into the stew. Um… we can just throw them in now, right?” 

“I mean, they’ll be pretty hard. Also, that pot’s boiling over.”

“Huh? Whoa! Hold on! Hold on! I got it!”

Lori was… not good in the kitchen. She had survived in college by mooching off friends, eating take-out, or going to the campus dining hall before coming home. The person who ended up using the kitchen the most was me because I was pretty stingy with my money.

Sadly, after Alice moved in, I was no longer able to cook my own meals. Everything Lori had done to avoid cooking was now what I had to do just to have a meal because I would be too small to do anything in the kitchen while shrunken down. That was why the true victim of my being shrunken down might have actually been Lori instead of me. She learned the consequence of overly relying on me when our leftovers as well as our emergency stock of instant noodles and frozen TV dinners finally ran out and she had to step into the kitchen again.

“Wait, is this flour safe to use? It’s a little… Crap. Remy, you were supposed to be in charge of restocking!”

“Do you think I’m in any state to check on everything in the cupboards? I can’t even reach the bottom shelf on my own let alone open it.”

“Oh, right. I guess I should’ve checked earli- Yeowch! Gyah! The oil’s splashing everywhere!”

It was a mixture of comedy and horror watching my giant sister use the lid of a pot as a shield to protect her from the splashing oil. 

“Dinner and a show? Lori, you’re too kind,” I chuckled. Watching Lori panic in the kitchen was hilarious but also concerning. I hoped she wouldn’t burn the apartment down, but I relished her shrieks whenever a pop sent the oil flying in her direction. Having to cook was one of the things Lori just always tried to avoid because even she was well aware that she was terrible at it. I had to take in the sight of my typically unflappable big sister being thrown off her game while I could. 

“... Remy, didn’t Lori want your help?”

“Whoa, Alice?!”  I found myself staring straight at eyes bigger than my head when I turned around. I was caught off guard by Alice’s monumental face. Her head had peaked up from underneath the countertop like a creature rising out of the abyss. She had thought of assisting Lori earlier but our cousin also lacked any cooking experience due to Aunt Shelly’s overprotectiveness so she had been hiding a safe distance away from the stove behind the countertop I was sitting on. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be helping her…?” 

“I’m helping. She just wanted someone to teach her the recipe. It’s not like I can move around the kitchen, but I’m giving advice when I have to.” 

“... What advice?” Alice was well aware I hadn’t actually been helping Lori. I wanted to see her mess up, so the only comments I had been making were snarky remarks. “Um… We have to all eat this, Remy. Shouldn’t you help make sure it tastes good?”

“Heh. I have my own food right here,” I grabbed my shrunken backpack and pulled out what I had bought earlier - a jalapeno cheese burger. “Sure, I can’t microwave it, but it beats anything Lori can make.”

“...Hmm…” Alice narrowed her eyes. I could tell what she was looking at because of how close I was to them. For a second, she glanced away from me to see Lori distracted with the oil. Afterwards, she turned her attention back to me and spoke with a whisper. “That’s unfair, Remy. I don’t want to eat that either…”

“Pfft!” I couldn’t stop myself from laughing as I unwrapped my burger, deciding to eat now. Even Alice’s kind nature couldn’t deny that Lori’s attempt at frying cutlets and making stew was far from what she’d call edible. “I wish I could help you there, but you’re out of ready-made meals too, aren’t you, Alice?”

“Y-You’re not wrong…,” Alice wanted to deny it, but she knew I was right. Much like Lori who had been trying to make our leftovers last, Alice had been relying on the stock of ready-made meals her Mom had given her up until now. “All I have left is an oatmeal pack…”

To show that it was all she had, Alice lifted up an instant oatmeal pack with a spoon sticking out of it. It seemed she was sneaking bites behind the countertop so she wouldn’t have to grow hungry waiting on Lori’s soon to be ruined dinner. The cup was actually a head taller than me. I stand in it and be completely covered in oatmeal if it was full.

“That’s a lot of oatmeal,” I commented, reading the label. “Oh, it has blueberries in it? Good choice.”

“Actually, I’m sick of oatmeal after all these weeks…,” Alice grumbled. Her eyes focused in on me… or rather, they locked onto the burger in my hands. “Remy… Can you give me part of your burger?”

I was surprised. My takeout order tempted Alice despite it being so small. It was a little unnerving seeing my over 100 foot tall cousin lick her lips directly in front of me. Because her chin was on the table, when she opened her mouth, I could see directly inside it and realize I could fit inside with ease at my 3” size. Even if I gave her my entire burger, it wouldn’t amount to anything more than a crumb to her.

“I don’t think it’d be any filling, Alice,” I shook my head and continued to eat. “You’ve got to learn how to cook too. Maybe me not getting to cook will motivate both you and Lori to make something.”

 “I’ll give you a blueberry for it…,” Alice tried to strike a deal. Using her spoon, she lifted out a blueberry and brought it down onto the table. “Here…”

I stared at the spoon of oatmeal incredulously. Even though she was just trying to pick out the blueberry, the oatmeal still clinging to the spoon looked like three bowls worth to me. The blueberry itself was bigger than my head.

“You’re kidding, right Alice?” putting my burger into the paper bag I had pulled it out from, I attempted to grab the basketball sized berry, but it was more like a bowling ball in weight. Realizing that, I sat down on the table and rolled it off of the spoon and onto. I wondered if I could even bite into it. “Is this even edible to me?”

“Ah… I’m not sure actually…” Alice glanced away from me when she realized that we never checked to see if it was okay to eat food while shrunken. I recalled Lori mentioning it was possible but not recommended simply because of the taste. Was it actually that bad?

“Well, here goes nothing?” I questioned my own decision as I curiously tried to bite into the skin of the blueberry. The berry’s skin seemed thicker than watermelon’s rind, but it had a little more give to it. Somehow or another, my teeth successfully pierced into it, and I was met with a splash of juice and intense sweetness. Instead of actually biting, I found I was trying to suck out the insides instead of actually chewing on the blueberry.

“Ehehe. That looks really cute, Remy…,” Seeing me try to eat the singular blueberry like a hamster nibbling its food, she started giggling. 

“Please don’t call this cute.”

“A-Ah, sorry…” Alice apologized. I wasn’t actually mad at her, but it was a bit demeaning. I did not want to be treated like a pet.

Unable to actually eat the blueberry, I shoved it back onto the spoon. “Jeez… I think I’ll give up on this. It doesn’t taste right. Besides, this thing’s bigger than my burger, Alice. Way too much for me.”

“I guess it is a bit too big for you… Aaah~m!” Alice realized and picked the spoon up again to eat the berry. I watched as the impossible to eat blueberry disappeared in the darkness of Alice’s mouth right in front of my eyes. “But it’s not filling at all to me… Please, Remy, can I have a piece?”

My cousin’s stomach growling. Being looked at by my ravenous cousin was a big concern when I was no bigger than a kid-sized chocolate bar. Still, I dared to refuse her. “Nope. Not happening.”

Taking my burger out of the bag again, I bit down onto it hard, trying to finish off as much of it as I could.

“Eh? NO DON’T!” Alice shouted, but I had already eaten more than three quarters of it and started scarfing down the remainder. “Aw… I wanted to grow it back…”

That would’ve been a good idea to get something regular sized to eat, but I wasn’t going to let her get out of eating Lori’s failure of a meal. Considering I had lived with my sister longer than Alice, I had already tasted the charcoal creations Lori typically ended up with. As nice as I was to my cousin, I considered this her baptism to apartment meals.

“You’re eating with Lori whether you like it or not, Alice,” I told her. “Sis’s cooking sucks, so either get used to it or start learning some recipes of your own.”

“Who’s cooking sucks now?”

“E-eek!” “Speak of the devil.”

Alice’s shout earlier had caught my big sister’s attention. I didn’t need to turn around to feel her presence behind me because her shadow had literally fallen over me, blocking the kitchen light. Lori had heard the tail end of our conversation, meaning Alice and I were both busted trying to not eat her cooking.

“Did I stutter?” I didn’t care if I was caught, though. Whether it was because I was used to my sister or because I was a reckless idiot, I wasn’t sure, but I was not afraid to provoke the giant 100+ foot woman glaring down at me. “I can smell that you burnt a lot of the chicken you were frying up.”

“... R-Remy?” Alice was in disbelief at my lack of self-preservation.

“It sure was fun seeing you panic with the oil, Sis,” I certainly kept digging my grave deeper. Well, it was my job as the younger brother to annoy my big sister after all. “10/10. Would watch again.”

“Well, aren’t you happy about that free show you got,” Lori was angry but still composed. She put the plate she was holding down onto the table near me, freeing up her hands. “I guess it’s meal time then so you can have dinner with your show. Or maybe I should have dinner first.”

Whoosh!

“Whoah!”

My sister was fast. Before I realized what had happened, she snatched me up off the kitchen countertop and tossed me onto the plate. My body dropped right next to a steaming puddle of beef stew that smelled too strongly of raw potato.

“Ouch… Blargh…” I covered my nose. “You couldn’t have waited a little longer for those potatoes to soften, Lori?”

“I could, but I think my little bro needs to soften up a bit too,” Lori took out a spoon and brought it down at me.

“Hey, I’m not food here! Gah!” I got up to avoid the spoon, but Lori started chasing me with it around the plate. There wasn’t much on the plate so it was easy to move around without getting stuck in food. Considering I was the size of a hunk of meat, I could actually be scooped up by it, and sadly, I wasn’t able to avoid it. Lori caught me easily, lifting me up to her face… or more specifically, her mouth.

“L-Lori?” Alice put her hands over her eyes but looked through the gaps between her fingers at what was about to happen. 

“Damn…,” I covered my face with my arms. Lori’s mouth was so close that I could feel her hot breath escape her lips like a strong gust of wind. Her pearly white teeth were almost the size of my head, giving me a good idea of how small I was. I really could fit in her mouth.

“Heh, being right in front of my mouth shut you up, didn’t it, Remy?” my sister knew she had the upper hand. Knocking me off my high horse was super simple to her now that she only had to breathe on me to do so. “You gonna apologize?”

“Nope,” I remained defiant despite my trembling knees. I did NOT want Lori to get any idea of popping me into her mouth. That sounded disgusting for both of us but more threatening to me. “You made such a huge mess of the kitchen trying to make your beef stew and fried chicken. I think as a former frequenter of this kitchen, I have the right to tell you off about it.”

“...” Lori turned her head to look at the rest of the kitchen - a simple action that created another gust of wind that I could feel. After examining the place, she clicked her tongue, knowing I was right. “Tch! You sure do know how to hit a nerve, Remy… But you really made a mistake thinking you can get away with it, especially at your size.”

“Whoa!” I shouted as the spoon I was on plummeted back down to the plate. Before I could get my bearings, though, Lori lifted the entire dish off of the table. “Uwaff!”

Unable to remain standing due to the constant shaking by my giant sister’s steps, I fell flat onto the plate, finding myself subjected to the repeated jerking up and down until there was one final, intense drop downwards that caused my stomach to churn from the feeling of weightlessness.

“There. Why don’t you have dinner down here tonight?” Lori declared after finally letting go of the plate.

“Huh?” When I stood up, I realized I was no longer able to see Lori or Alice’s faces. In front of me were four peach towers - my sister’s and cousin’s legs. She had put the plate on the floor underneath our dining table. “Seriously?”

“Remy’s going to be eating there…?” Alice was shocked. “W-Wow… It’s like a pet bowl…”

I didn’t appreciate that comparison one bit. Actually, for some reason, Alice sounded a little interested in that fact rather than concerned.

“That should be enough of a punishment for you, Bro. Now, you sit down and I go get a plate for you too, Alice?”

“W-Wait, L-Lori…?” Two of those towers suddenly became two feet that rose above me. Lori pulled Alice and forced her to sit down. She pushed the chair so that whenever Alice put her feet down, they were inches away from me.

“Sit down, Alice. I worked real hard on this so you two are eating every last bite,” I heard Lori declare.

“I-I’m good, Lori… I just had some oatme-”

“Just. Sit. Tight.” It was clear that earlier she had heard that Alice also didn’t want to eat her cooking because she was firmly keeping Alice still.

“Uuuuu…”

Alice’s whine was accompanied by her feet dropping to the carpet. Her heels hit the floor and bumped into the plate. Despite it being just an inch of movement from her perspective, it was a sudden shift in the ground to me so I ended up falling over. 

“Gak!”

“Ah, sorry, Remy!”

I sighed as I got up. I had thankfully not fallen into the stew. Lori only had a bit of beef stew on my plate so I didn’t have to see the burnt fried chicken. Still I was able to see that, aside from the raw potato and burned parts, she also had added way too much flour to thicken it. I could tell because I could still see the white flour floating in the salty brown goop. “Urgh… I guess we’re both stuck eating her slop now…. Well, at least for me, I doubt Lori would even realize if I even ate any.”

My bites would be imperceptible to her so I could just sit and wait until dinner was over without having to eat a single bite of her poor cooking. I preferred that because Alice’s feet were right over the plate. She made sure to not get her feet too close to where I was, but the smell of her sweat was wafting towards me.

Thud! Thud!

“Urk!” I ground my teeth as Lori took the seat on the opposite side of the table, apparently having brought plates of her cooked food over. To my dismay, my big sister’s longer legs meant that she could stretch her legs out and reach the other side of the plate I was standing on. Her bare feet actually leaned over the dish unlike Alice’s. Carpet lint and dust flaked off her toes and onto the food. “Ulk… That’s just nasty.”

My big sister didn’t hear my remark because she was so far away while I was on the ground, but she knew exactly where I was because I was still on the plate. She rocked her feet back and forth, causing the very air around me to shift from the building-like masses moving around so quickly.

“You having fun down there, Bro? Must be fun having dinner with 20 guests,” she chuckled, referring to the toes she was wriggling as guests. She knew I was surrounded in four directions by both hers and Alice’s feet. Each one surrounded the ceramic plate like a pillar of some sort of  battle arena. Putting me on the same level as each of their toes though… She wasn’t wrong considering I was probably weaker than even Alice’s pinky toe, but if we counted each toe as an individual, I was outnumbered 20 to 1.

“L-Lori… That’s a little…” Alice wanted to retort, but her nervousness to speak up caused her to hold it in. Besides, she had another concern at that moment - my big sister’s cooking.

“Well, I’ll let Remy off after dinner. Come on Alice, dig in! It’s a little burnt, but it should still taste good… I think!”

Lori’s confidence in her cooking had a couple of kinks in it. Even she wasn’t sure if it was any good. If I were capable of being heard from the floor, I’d ask her if she had even bothered taste testing her food before plating it, but I both couldn’t and knew that the answer was a definitive ‘No’. She knew her ship was sinking and she was trying to drag both of us down while keeping as much of her pride as she could.

“Well, bottoms up!”

“...”

Clang!

For a moment, there was silence after Lori took the first bite. Then, I heard the metal spoon rattle on the plate. I could tell it was dropped from my big sister’s hand. I had seen it coming, so the words that came out of her mouth next did not surprise me at all.

“... Let’s order a pizza…”