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Author's Chapter Notes:

Jeannine spends a day with her mom...

POV: Jeannine

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Calling the car ride with Mom 'awkward' would be putting it lightly. Despite her cheerful mood and near-giddy smile, I cannot stop thinking about what she did. It hasn't even been twenty four hours since she gave me and the tinies the biggest scare of our lives! I haven't had a chance to process these emotions yet, so I'm feeling incredibly anxious. This isn't the first time I've felt this way, either. Ever since I started this secret project of mine, I've been finding it more difficult to be around her. I have such a personal relationship with the kind of people she's so fond of hurting. Reconciling my love for her and my hatred of her choices is tearing my heart in two. There's a rift between us that continues to grow, even if she doesn't see it.


I glance over at her without moving my head. She's humming along to a song on the radio, her glee plain as day. I know she's happy to see me, her only child and daughter, and it pains me that I can't match that energy today.


"It's alright, Jeannie." Ori reassures me from inside of my earring. "For all she knows, you two had a fight, but you worked it out. Wearing that frown will only make her worry, or worse, cause her to be suspicious."


My expression softens when I hear that. Partly because she is right, but mostly because I don't want her to see me upset. It came as a shock when Ori asked to accompany my Mom and I this morning. After what she went through, being close to the 'monster' who nearly killed her was the last thing I expected her to want. Knowing her background and past trauma, her request didn't make any sense. I feel there is cause for concern.


Unable to speak, I give a subtle nod. It's enough to get the message across. Even the subtlest movements on my part are easily noticeable to my little friend. 


"Don't worry about me." She says, as if reading my mind. She has always been very perceptive like that. "I will be okay. Try to have a nice day with your mom. If not for her, then for yourself." 


I respond by raising my finger and stroking the earring lightly. I suppose I can allow myself to forget about all my worries for a day. Whether I'm actually having a good time or not is irrelevant so long as Mom thinks I am. To that end, I try to focus on the positive. I remind myself that she's my mother, someone I love very much and don't want to disappoint. I should break the silence.


"Hey, Mom?" I say, softly.


"Yes, Jeannie?" She glances over at me momentarily, before focusing back on the road. Her hand moves to lower down the music, her smile refusing to disappear from her face even as she speaks.


"We've been driving for a while, and you haven't told me where we're going."


"It's a surprise!" She says, winking at me. "But I'll give you a hint. It's a place I've been wanting to visit for a long time."


I look out the window, checking for anything I recognize. We have been driving for at least an hour, having left the city a while ago. We are now on a dirt road in seemingly the middle of nowhere. There are not any street signs to help either. It is my fault for being so distracted until now. If I'd been paying attention, I'd probably have an idea. Sure, I could always pull out my phone and check, but I think that'll upset her.


"I've no clue."


"You don't? I'm sure I mentioned it at least twice before." She pauses to contemplate something. "Oh well, you'll know soon enough. We're only ten minutes away now."


I spend the next few minutes trying to recall anything from our past conversations but come up with nothing. I'm usually very good at remembering the things people tell me. Looking out the window, I finally see a street sign in the distance. Once we're closer, I'm able to read what it says.


'NB Memorial'

'1.5km'


Suddenly, I feel a discomfort in my stomach. Now I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she did not tell me. There is no way I would've come along if I knew this is where she planned to take me.


"Mom." I say, sternly. My tone is slightly accusatory. 


She looks at me with a guilty, yet cheerful expression. "S-Surprise!"


"The New Brobdingnag Memorial? Seriously, Mom?!" I glare at her. "You're taking me to a place that commemorates the war with Lilliputia?"


"It's a world heritage site. I wasn't going to leave before seeing this place, especially when you live relatively close." She explains, her expression slightly more serious now. "Knowing how interested you are in those specks, I figured you'd be able to learn something while we're here. Plus, there is a museum!"


"Mom, I..." My voice trails off.


"It'll be fun, Jeannie. Don't you always tell me that I should be more open minded to new things? Who knows, I will see something here that'll change my mind?"


"I can't argue with that." I return her smile with my own.


A brief time later, we pull into the parking lot. The area is busy, which makes sense considering how close we are to Independence day. Places like this will become absolutely packed next week. I'm sure Mom would've preferred to visit on the actual day, if only her vacation days aligned better. The two of us get out of the car and begin walking to the site.


"Eep!" Ori's sudden squeal causes me to flinch. I feel Mom's hand on my right shoulder, and subsequently very so close to Ori. It must have startled her. I make a mental note to stand on Mom's right side from now on.


"Here, take this." She says, handing me a ticket. "I already bought ours online so we could skip the line at the entrance. It's valid for three hours."


"Good thinking. Thanks, Mom."


"Anytime, baby." She says, removing her hand. "Let's check out the memorial first."


We get our tickets stamped at the entrance and enter without any delay. I follow Mom since she seems to know where she is going. The chatting of strangers creates enough noise to allow me to speak to Ori. I have to whisper, though, since Mom is still close.


"I'm sorry, Ori. If I had known we were coming here, I would've warned you. How are you holding up?" 


"I'm doing well. You mother gave me quite the scare just now, otherwise I'm fine."


"Good. Let me know if things get too intense for you. I'll excuse myself if you need me to."


"You worry about me too much. I'm tougher than you think, Jeannine." She explains, sounding genuinely relaxed. "But since you're such a worrywart, let me tell you this. I asked to join you today to help overcome my fears. When your mother attacked us, she reminded me of CĂ©line. I realized that I still haven't overcome my trauma. I don't expect to in a day, but I hope that exposing myself to her might be a necessary step."


"I wish you'd told me. I support your decision one-hundred percent."


Having Ori observe Mom from the safety of the earring might just be the perfect way to help her. She is exposing herself without actually being exposed. There is no danger, so long as she's with me. Despite how I feel about being in a place like this, I'm happy that Ori's benefitting from the experience.


"So, what do you think? It is magnificent, isn't it?" Mom asks me.


The two of us slow to a stop as we reach the foundation of a tall, snow-white tower. I crane my head back following the enormous thing from bottom to top. I recognize it from pictures in history books and news stories. The massive obelisk before us is the New Brobdingnag Monument. It was built shortly after our victory over the Lilliputians, during the establishment of this nation. It's ridiculous size is meant to symbolize our dominance over the races of the world. You're supposed to look at it and feel small, like how the Lillis look at us. I admit that it does make me feel that way, but they're way off. I've seen how we look from a Lilli's eyes. Using the videos of me that Nick shared as reference, I'm fairly sure this thing wouldn't even reach my knee.


"It's very showy." I shrug. "You know how I feel about the message it's meant to send. So much for equality." 


"That's just what the sightseers say. Its actual significance comes from its location." Mom reminds me, pointing at the ground.


My gaze falls to the gray marble we're standing on. I scowl, realizing what she means. This place in the middle of nowhere was chosen for a reason. Back when Lilliputia still had most of its land, this is where their capitol city was. I try to picture it now, as it was so long ago. There were millions of people living here. Our army quite literally wiped them off the map. And while all of that happened long before either me or my mother were born, it is no less tragic. I feel a sense of guilt that is difficult to shake.


"How many specks could I get with one stomp of my foot." Mom says, lifting her foot and dropping it slowly. "It was a populated area. I'm terrible at math, but I bet it'd be at least ten thousand."


I give her a disapproving look. If she were asking out of morbid curiosity, I might not have been so irritated. Judging by the look on her face, she is clearly imagining how it would feel to do it for real.


"Probably a lot, Mom. Why does it matter?"


"I've crushed a few Lilli groups before. I tried counting them, but they were so small. My record was two hundred in one shot, I think."


"That's terrible. I wish you'd keep those kinds of things to yourself."


"Considering they were living under my sink; I had every right. So says the law." She tells me, without a hint of remorse. "But even that's nothing when compared to what the soldiers were doing during the war. Statistics weren't as accurate back then, but new findings say that five hundred million were being wiped out every day."


Hearing those numbers make me want to vomit. I physically cringe, just thinking about it.


"How terrible. May they rest in peace." Ori says, her tone somber.


"What a heartless disregard for life." I shake my head. "Call them specks, insects, or whatever. They were still living beings who had a right to life." 


Mom steps closer to me and looks me in the eyes. I reluctantly meet her gaze, trying and failing to hide my disgust.


"Jeannine, I'd like to tell you a story. It's not one you'll read about in history books."


I look at her skeptically. "Is it graphic?"


"No. In fact, it's not about the violence." She says, knowing that will pique my interest. "You wouldn't know this because I never told you. Your great grandfather, my grandfather, fought in the war. He wasn't even ten years old when the world learned of Lilliputia's existence."


As much as it disappoints me to learn that once of my ancestors participated in the genocide, I cannot help wanting to know more. "Really?"


"Mhm." She nods, proudly. "Foreign media likes to focus on the killing, but they never ask why it happened to begin with."


"Everyone knows it's because we wanted their land. It was imperialism, plain and simple."


She shakes her head at me. "No, it wasn't. My grandfather told me the truth when I was a little girl. We took their land because, if we didn't, there wasn't going to be a future for our people."


I look at Mom with pure confusion in my eyes. I have never heard this view on history. Even people as sizist as Dr. Lam still admit that we took their land simply because we could.


"Tell me more."


Her eyes light up as I take interest in her story. "As you know, Brobdingnag, Gulliveria, and Lilliputia are nations of vastly different sizes. Just before the war broke out, we were experiencing terrible overpopulation, poverty, and inequality. There were simply too many of us to fit on our tiny, little island. Society was on the brink of collapse. Even with the advent of innovative technology from the other, more advanced nations, things weren't looking good. A now-unnamed person proposed that taking the Lilli's land would not just ensure our survival, but provide a future in which we could thrive. We did what we had to do."


"Is that how you're justifying our actions? Because 'we had to'?" I scoff. 


"It was a matter of survival, Jeannine. None of us would be alive right now if our predecessors hadn't done that." She explains, without a hint of remorse. "Our family was incredibly poor back then. They could barely afford a place with a roof over their heads. After the war ended, my grandfather brought his pregnant wife here and enjoyed a fresh start. No more hardship."


"The way I see it, we invaded our neighbours house because we couldn't get ours in order." I tell her, my chest becoming tight. "Now the Lillis, or rather, the Remnants live worse lives than we did."


"Such is life." She shrugs. "If it's me or them, I choose me."


Mom and I stare at each other in silence. I cannot help but look away. As much as I'd like to yell at her, this isn't the time nor place. Looking around at the other visitors and seeing their smiling faces reminds me she isn't alone in her thinking. Most of the people here think like her. There may even be some who are more malicious. It makes me feel incredibly out of place. I feel so much like an alien that I might as well be green.


"Whatever. I wonder if that's what you tell yourself when you kill every Lilli unfortunate enough to cross your path."


For once, Mom does not respond. It seems I hit the mark with that one. The cheeky smile on her face is not endearing in the slightest. 


"I think we've spent enough time here. We will head to the museum next, but first..." She stands closer to me and holds her phone out for a selfie, with the monument behind us. "Say cheese!"


I quickly flash a smile, just before she takes the picture. Obviously I'm in no mood for this kind of thing, but I know that if I don't she'll just make me take the picture again. She checks the picture, and once she's satisfied, we make our way over the museum.


"Your mother is wrong, you know." Ori tells me.


"Clearly." I whisper.


"No, I mean that her story is inaccurate. We Lillis know our history better than you. I mean no offense when I say that."


"I know, Ori." 


"She mentioned your great grandfather. I find that interesting, since I also have a story from one of my predecessors. Would you like to hear it?"


"Certainly. I need to be quiet now, but please go on."


Mom and I enter the museum together. It is a small building consisting of a continuous walkway past various exhibits. Once you've walked through, you'll enter a gift shop before returning to the outside. It's courtesy to be quiet in places like these, out of respect. While we did not suffer too many casualties in the conflict, the lives of the fallen are honored here. We slowly make our way through, stopping for a short time at each exhibit.


"My great grandfather used to live in the capitol. I have no doubt someone outside is standing where his home used to be right now." She tells me, without any sadness in her voice. "Our nation knew of the struggles your people were experiencing. We shared our technology with the hope that it could fix some of your problems. However, it became clear that the Brobs coveted our land. No one was surprised when they attacked. In fact, our coastal cities had already been evacuated. Given their nation's population at the time, we speculated that they would only need a fifth of our land to fix most of their problems. Considering how low our population density was, we could afford to move people. Nonetheless, we wouldn't simply lay down and let them take it. We fought back as best we could, but it did little to stop their overwhelming force."


I listen to Ori's story as I walk past old pictures from the war. Most of them show our forces, but a few of them do show Lilli cities. They serve as a visual aid as she continues explaining. While I try not to linger on any one thing, some of the old photographs catch my eye. 


One depicts a soldier throwing a grenade at a small town. The small explosive must have been like an atomic bomb, minus the radiation. Pieces of shrapnel can be seen embedded in the streets and partially in buildings. 


Another shows a group of soldiers dumping buckets of water onto a large city. The ensuing flood washes away all traces of civilization, drowning the inhabitants. It's so cruel, I wish they'd just stomped on them instead. At least then their deaths would have been swift. No, I suppose that must have been too boring. They wanted to get creative to make it more fun. 


I am utterly disgusted. I can hardly bring myself to look any longer.


"Many of us were relieved by the time they'd taken what we'd expected them to. Fatalities, while inevitable, had been greatly reduced. We offered them a peace treaty at that point, hoping to resolve the conflict once and for all. We were shocked when they ignored it. Their advance continued.


The fifth of land they had stolen grew to a third, and then half, and so on. Eventually, they had taken ninety percent. Our population had been reduced by just as much, if not more. Though, that excluded the displaced people who are now referred to as Remnants. The Brobs of old were greedy. They did not attack us out of necessity. Please don't believe the words of your mother, Jeannine."


"I don't." I whisper, so softly that even I can barely hear it. I wish I could say more, but I cannot right now. I'll have to save it for later this afternoon, once Mom drops me back at home. 


I look at Mom with a frown on my face, disappointed in her. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. She believes that false history. I'm privilege to know the truth, especially from the lips of an actual Lilli. The two of us continue through the museum until we reach the end. This puts us in the giftshop. While, I'm not interested in buying anything, it seems that she is.


"Fascinating, wasn't it? It makes you appreciate the sacrifices of those who came before us."


"It was very eye opening." I tell her, though my words are directed at Ori.


"Do you see anything you like? Pick one souvenir and I'll buy it for you."


"No, thank you. I think I'll pass." 


"Oh, don't be like that!" She grabs my hand, leading me to the other side of the store. "Fine. I'll just have to pick something for you."


She takes me to a booth that appears to be selling hourglasses, strangely enough. I get that we're at a historical place, but that seems pretty random to me. She approaches the man running the thing and asks the same question that's on my mind.


"Hi there! I noticed you're selling hourglasses? I'd like to know more."


"Of course." The man at the booth smiles, presenting one to her. "These aren't your typical hourglasses. Instead of sand, we use something much more special. Take a closer look."


My Mom brings the item up to her eye and gasps. The man then hands another one to me.


Curious, I raise it up to my eye as well. Ori and I gasp at the same time when we realize what is inside.


"These exclusive items use debris from the old Lilli capitol instead of sand. Those tiny bits and pieces of buildings, street signs, and the like have been treated with special chemicals so that they won't disintegrate with time. They were collected at this very site when the memorial was being built. What you're holding right there is a real piece of history!"


"I can't believe what I'm seeing..." I think aloud, too shocked to care. 


"I-I..." Ori stutters, experiencing a similar shock.


"Amazing!" Mom cheers. "But there's no way these things actually work, right?"


"Actually, they do!" The man says, taking out a third one to demonstrate. He tips it over, allowing the tiny structures to fall through like sand. At this distance, it is difficult to tell the difference. "It takes exactly seventy nine seconds for all the 'sand' to flow through. As you might've guessed, it's a reference to our Independence day, the Seventh of September."


"Oh my!" Mom giggles. "How patriotic! I'll take two."


"M-Mom!" I protest, only to be silenced by her.


She proceeds with the purchase, handing both of our display versions for proper, sealed versions from the man. 


I hurry out of the giftshop before her, as the uneasy feeling throughout my body reaches a peak. As I step outside, I find the nearest wall and lean on it, my breathing now ragged. I don't even want to look at the thing in my hand. It's an affront to all things good in this world!


"Jeannine, take a breath! You need to calm yourself down." Ori instructs me. She takes a slow, deep breath, before exhaling. She has me do the same until I am calm again. "That was horrifying, but I can't have you fainting. That just won't do."


A moment later, Mom joins me outside. "Don't tell me the hourglass bothered you too? I swear, Jeannie, you are far too sensitive sometimes..."


"Can we please sit down somewhere? I could really use a glass of water."


"Me too." She nods. "The prices here are ridiculous! Plus, I think we have seen all that there is to see here. Let's get lunch on the way home."


At last, the two of us leave the memorial, and not a moment too soon. Those items in the giftshop were the last straw. I wasn't going to be able to maintain my composure any longer. As we get back on the road, Mom turns up the music and I go silent. It's no different than how it was on the way here. 


"Thanks for coming with me, Jeannie. I know that this stuff bothers you, but I hope you got something out of it. At the very least, I hope you're enjoying spending a day with me." She leans over and kisses my cheek, somehow keeping her eyes on the road at the same time.


"I'm always happy when we spend time together." I tell her. It is the truth. "I just wish that we could agree on...this."


"Sadly, Jeannie, I don't think we ever will. You're a grown woman now, and you have your views, but so am I." She glances over at me, her expression serious. "We each have our reasons and beliefs, after all."


"You've got that right. Finally, something we can agree on..." I sigh. I feel the need to say something final. I have a bunch of ideas in my head, but I can't settle on one. Before I know it, my feelings start pouring out my mouth. "You're free to believe what you want, but that doesn't come without consequences. I don't... No, I can't have a relationship with someone who does such horrible things. Know that if you continue in your ways, you'll only be pushing me further away. If you want me to continue being in your life...then don't make it so hard for me. I'll always love you, Mom, but that doesn't mean I don't also hate the disgusting things you do."


Mom stays silent for a time, probably surprised to hear me speak to her like that. I don't think I've ever been so harsh with my words to her, but I don't regret saying them. "I will try to remember that."


That is all she says. Her tone is deadpan, difficult even for me to read. It leaves me feeling anxious. The rest of the ride is relatively quiet, after I singlehandedly ruined the mood. I turn to look out the window, both in frustration and guilt.


"You can't change everyone, Jeannine." I hear Ori say. "If she wants to be stuck in her ways, then let her. For every Lilli she kills, you will just have to save two!" 


Her encouragement makes me smile. I give her a subtle nod to acknowledge her. I suppose there are just some people that will never change. They refuse to, no matter how much you try. There comes a point when there's nothing more you can do. I have to learn to accept that she isn't my responsibility, I shouldn't blame myself for her life choices. She serves as an example of what not to be, whether she realizes it or not.


Ori then continues, "You know, I've learned something after coming here, watching you two. Despite your mother's views of us, you never inherited her feelings. I used to think that such things were unavoidable, but clearly they are not. I often worry that my trauma, my fear of Brobs, may be passed on to Louis. I would hate for that to happen. He's so young; he hasn't had the chance to become afraid yet. I can't think of a better example to be around than you at this critical time in his life. He is quite fond of you! It warms my heart when I see him look at you without fear. I hope that he never experiences what I did. We'd be failures if we passed our fears onto the next generation. Thank you for letting me join you today. I doubt I would have realized that if I hadn't tagged along."


I am so thoroughly impressed with Ori that I respond to her in my usual voice. 


"You're very welcome."


"Hm?" Mom hums, looking confused. "What was that, dear?"


"Nothing, Mom. Just talking to myself."


Chapter End Notes:

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