Gareth was standing at the edge of the Lamia village, hundreds of the snake-women had gathered to see him and his two new wives off. Lessie stood over them all, waving to the assembled crowd.
 
“So are you absolutely sure about this?” He asked the Lamia matriarch. “You want me to go even further into the swamp and marry the Arachne too?”

“Her name is Severa darling,” Lessie said, “and I have the utmost confidence in you.”

“I still don’t understand,” he muttered, “Why not one of the other Lamia?”

“What, are two not enough?” Lessie chuckled, “think about it Gareth, if you… well if WE, are going to be storming the Elven capital to save their queen, don’t you think we could use a giant Arachne to even the odds a bit?”

He sighed, she was right of course, but he still wasn’t sold on this plan of action. He’d been even more hesitant when he’d been told that this “Severa” wasn’t in on Lessie’s plan, and it would be up to him to explain the situation and woo her.

Lessie seemed to sense his reservations, “Gareth I don’t know what you’re so worried about,” she huffed, “Severa is lonely, you’re a handsome prince who wants to marry her! Most women love stories about that kind of thing.”

“And I loved adventure stories before I found myself in one,” he replied. “Technically I’m not a prince you know.”

“I already showed everyone in the village your paperwork,” Lessie said, “Right girls?” The gathered Lamia behind her giggled. “We all know EXACTLY how much royal blood you’ve got, and by our standards you’re a prince.”

She turned to the other Lamia and grinned, “Remember girls, PRINCE Gareth was so impressed with how well everyone here follows The Rules that he wants his empire to ally with us!” There was cheering, “And the humans are going to send husbands for everyone here!” that got them absolutely wild. Lessie smiled and waited a few minutes for them to calm down, “Now, while we are gone all of you need to get everything ready for our big mission! Restring your bows, practice your archery, prepare medicines.”

“Yes Lessie!” the all chanted in unison. Gareth watched as hundreds of Lamia slithered off to their assigned tasks. Phoebe, his first wife, separated herself from the crowd, hefting his pack over her back. She shouldered it easily, and it almost looked comically small slung over her shoulder. It was another reminder of his new wife’s strength, and gentle though she was a part of him was still intimidated.

“This is so exciting!” she said eagerly, “I’ve got all your things packed up Gareth!” With a flourish she placed Gareth’s old hat on her head. “I’m ready to go!”

“Right,” he muttered, steeling himself, “Let’s do this then.”

“Hop on,” Lessie said, patting a part of her enormous tail.

“What?” He asked, confused, “I’m perfectly capable of walking!”

Lessie and Phoebe both laughed together, “Phoebe,” Lessie wheezed, “you were tracking Gareth and that elf when they came in the swamp weren’t you?” Phoebe nodded and she continued, “How long do you think it would take Gareth to get to Severa’s tree on foot?”

“At least two days,” Phoebe said, ruffling his hair, “Just ride on Lessie’s back Gareth, it’s only a couple hours for us!”

He looked up at the larger Lamia, who chuckled at his awkwardness.

“You don’t find anything… undignified in this?” he asked.

“I would have you ride on Phoebe’s tail,” Lessie said offhandedly, “but I don’t think she’s big enough.”

“It’s true,” Phoebe said, “your feet would probably drag on the ground.” Her eyes lit up suddenly, “Oh wait Lessie, I packed some of that pixie dust from your tent! Let’s just shrink Gareth down again and-“

“I think I’ll ride on Lessie’s back,” he said before she could finish.

“Oh? Do we not like the idea of being tiny again?” Lessie teased as he swung a leg up and climbed on her crimson tail.

Lessie’s human form would have made her a good twenty feet tall if she’d had legs. With her snakelike tail trailing where her legs would have been it was more than wide enough for him to ride, albeit with his legs splayed a bit wider than was easily comfortable.

They set off, and he was again amazed at how easily the Lamia traversed the swampy terrain. The Lamia had constructed their village on a raised area, an island of sorts, but even as they splashed into the stagnant water they swam through it quickly, almost like fish.

Phoebe was humming a cheery tune as the day progressed, “Gareth want something to eat?” she asked, sidling up to him. She reached into the bag and handed him a stick of dried meat, which he took and ate eagerly.

He was savoring the spices when he realized he didn’t recognize the meat. He chewed a bit slower for a moment, it had… an odd texture.

“Phoebe,” he said slowly, “What is this?”

“Jerky!” she said, happily taking a bite. “I made it myself!”

“I mean what IS it?” he asked nervously.

“OHHHH!” Phoebe said, understanding his question. “Alligator!”

He blanched, “A-alligator?”

“With some of my favorite seasonings,” Phoebe said, “it’s not too spicy, is it? I put pixy dust on mine, but you can’t have it… you know because of the shrinking.”

“You’re lucky to get that,” Lessie chuckled, “I had to tell all of the girls not to give you rat.”

“It’s so strange,” Phoebe mused, “Do you really not like rat Gareth? They’re so tasty…”

“Humans just don’t eat it,” he said. Chewing over the alligator meat a few more times he swallowed, and with a shrug took another bite.

He had another thought, “Phoebe… you cook the rats before you eat them right?”

He’d spent a lot of time kissing her mouth the night before, and a fair amount of time IN it the night before that.

“No, they taste great fresh!” Phoebe said with relish, “Live and wriggling!”

“Phoebe!” Lessie snapped.

The smaller lamia burst out laughing, “Yes I cook the rats Gareth, we’re CIVILIZED remember?”

“I almost put cook all of your food in The Rules,” Lessie muttered, “meat at least…”

Phoebe frowned “Lessie while we’re talking about them I have a few questions about The Rules-“

“I didn’t just make them up!” she swore, “Lots of them were from human religious texts, tell her about how great they are Gareth!”

Phoebe looked curiously to him and he cleared his throat, “I uhhh… suppose we could get a priest out here at some point to look them over and check-“

Phoebe’s eyes narrowed, “Lessie, what about that one rule about not waking up early on Saturdays?”

Gareth laughed in spite of himself, “You gave them a religious commandment about sleeping in?”

“And it’s one future generations will thank me for!” Lessie said defensively. Between Gareth’s laughter and Phoebe’s judgmental glare she sighed, “Look, I was a lot younger when I wrote all that okay?”

Phoebe huffed, “I mean… I guess they’ve worked pretty good for us so far.” She brightened and slithered up Lessie’s side to give Gareth a quick squeeze, “And you were right, I DID get a husband!”

As they got deeper into the swamp the vegetation grew thicker, and soon even the two Lamia were being slowed by the thick reeds. This part of the swamp was elevated slightly, like the area where the Lamia built their village, and dry patches were more common. In the distance a trio of the massive trees, the same kind the elves made their homes in, loomed. Glistening in the mid-day sun he could see strands and clusters of white thread… spiderwebs.

“That’s where she lives,” Lessie said, gesturing.

Gareth slid off Lessie’s tail and with a squishing sound planted his boots on the marshy soil. The three trees were bound together by woven spider thread, with various logs, rocks, and other materials suspended here and there at the lower levels, creating a sort of wall. It was almost like a patchwork tower, a mix of stone, webbing, and tree growth. At the ground level a massive round entrance loomed, the thick white webbing seeming to drain inward to it, Gareth realized with a start that it looked very much like the funnel webs of the spiders he knew from forests back home.

“Before we go in, I want to say a few things,” Lessie said suddenly. Gareth and Phoebe stopped, looking up at her, “Severa might be a bit… angry at first.”

“What!?” Gareth said, looking nervously at the massive structure, “Why would she be angry? I thought this spider-woman was your friend?”

“We ARE friends,” Lessie said, “but… Severa is a very solitary individual, and Arachne are a very aggressive and territorial species.” Lessie seemed a bit embarrassed, “I was trying to think of a way to explain this but… she’s always told me to keep humans far away. I don’t think she likes them.”

“How could you not like humans?” Phoebe asked quizzically, “Look at Gareth, he’s adorable!”

“That he is,” Lessie said, shooting him a quick smile, “but sometimes it can be difficult for humans to live next to… well, anything they call monsters I suppose.” The larger lamia chuckled for a moment, “I used to wonder WHY humans were so aggressive… then I had my own civilization to tend to. Do you remember how I used to send you and your sisters to clear the swamp of monsters Phoebe?”

“Well yeah, but we had to!” Phoebe protested, “the goblins kept trying to steal our best alligators, and those weird hornet things wanted to eat US!”

“I think the humans felt much the same way about Lamia,” Lessie said, “And I think they felt that way about Arachne too.”

“But that’s why you made the rules right?” Phoebe asked hesitantly, shooting a quick glance at Gareth, “So we could get along with them better?”

“Among other things,” Lessie sighed as the three of them came to the mouth of the webbed funnel. “Let me go first.”

As soon as she slithered across the threshold a series of purple flames, hovering unsupported in midair, flickered into being, lighting the path before them. They heard the soft flickering of the flames seem to stretch down the hall, and faintly a pipe organ began to play in the far distance.

“It’s a dungeon,” Gareth said breathlessly, “It’s like something out of a storybook…”

“Severa does have a flair for the dramatic,” Lessie admitted, “And for sorcery. She taught me everything I know about alchemy, and it wasn’t half of what she knows.” Lessie’s face reddened a moment, “Also… she didn’t exactly give me the materials to reverse your shrinking Gareth.”

“Because the gods know she wasn’t dangerous enough as a mere hundred-foot-tall spider,” Gareth muttered. He paused a second, “Do you mean to tell me you STOLE from this woman? Does she know?”

“This is neat!” Phoebe said in awe, looking around, “Lessie, could we build something like this?”

“No!” Lessie snapped, “Dungeons and traps for wary adventurers are the OLD way of doing things! We have civilization Phoebe, we’ve got a road, a baker, even a smith!”

Phoebe frowned, but didn’t argue the point. As Lessie cautiously led the way Phoebe held back with Gareth and sidled up to him.

“Gareth,” she asked in a hushed tone, “That stuff Lessie said about humans… not getting along with… monsters? Is that stuff true?”

“Yes,” he said quietly.

“But I’m not a monster, right?” She asked, a tinge of panic in her voice, “None of us are!? We’ve been kind to you haven’t we?”

“You have!” he reassured her, “I…” he searched for the words, “Phoebe, you’re a wonderful girl, nobody would think you’re a monster.”

She seemed to sigh with relief, “I just… want to be sure everything’s going to work out,” she said, “For us I mean? The other humans aren’t going to-“

She was cut off by a high-pitched scream from further up ahead. While they’d been talking Lessie had entered a large antechamber, the two of them watched in shock as her crimson tail was lifted upwards, quickly disappearing from their view.

“LESSIE!” they both shouted, sprinting forward. The two of them came to a halt inside the central chamber. It was clear that this was the space in the center of the three tree’s that made up Severa’s home, though instead of an opening like Gareth had half expected only darkness stretched above them
.
Gareth gulped and gently laid a hand on his saber pommel, “S-Severa?” He called, his voice echoing up. “I’m Gareth, this is Phoebe. Could you… please come out and speak with us?”

“I should have known there was a human here in the swamp,” a husky female voice seemed to echo from all around them, as if her voice was carried by the web itself. “Lessie stole a few things from me a few nights ago to reverse pixie dust… I’m guessing that you are the blundering fool who got himself shrunk?”

“That’s him!” Phoebe called nervously. “H-He’s all better now!”

“Is he really BETTER though?” the voice chuckled, “I’d have preferred him staying small, pathetic…” A pair of enormous spider legs reached out of the shadows and into the light, “Not that he isn’t still of course… both of you are in fact.”

A face the size of a house loomed down at them and grinned. She had gleaming red eyes and long pale-pink hair that hung around her upside down form like sheets, swaying gently as she moved. As she moved and the low light glinted off her face Gareth realized that she had a series of smaller eyes arranged around her forehead, easily visible in contrast to her deathly pale skin. smiled at his discomfort, revealing a pair of fangs that, while smaller proportionally, looked much sharper than Phoebe’s.

Her body was revealed in full as she reached the bottom of the chamber, a lithe and seductive form in her upper half, clothed with a sleek and shiny black material that clung to her like a second skin. Gareth felt his heart pick up as her lower half, with it’s sleek black carapace and red hourglass marking, scuttled behind her.

He’d been mentally preparing himself for his first meeting with her since they’d left the Lamia village. He was married to one Lamia who was Amazonian in proportion to him, and to another who, coiled upright, was probably taller than a barn, and to top it off he’d been shrunk to a small size and even consummated his first marriage no bigger than a doll…

It hadn’t been enough, with her legs spread wide Severa was truly massive, covering the wall. Gareth didn’t care for spiders, but he’d seen how they moved. He had a sudden image of Severa leaping off the wall, those massive legs curling around him and Phoebe before they could even react. Even her upper half would easily hold him in her hand, and while he’d been carried by Phoebe during his time being small he’d always been able to console himself that it was just he who was small, and temporarily at that. Severa’s size was hitting him on another level, and it took him a moment to gather his courage.

“So what business does a human and one of Lessie’s little worms have with me?” Severa mused. “Let’s get a closer look at you.”

Before either of them could react the Arachne’s back legs twitched slightly and a series of pale threads fell from the ceiling. He heard Phoebe scream in surprise as she was yanked upwards, and he gasped in shock as the sticky material pulled him up with her. The two of them dangled helplessly as Severa delicately grabbed the threads holding them and brought them close to her face. Her legs scuttled down to the ground as she righted herself, holding the two of them upside down.

“A delightfully cute human,” she mused, her hand came up, and as she twirled it around him more thread came down, roping his arms to his sides.

“He is!” Phoebe said, fighting down nervousness, “S-Severa that’s why we came here! Gareth wants to marry you!”

The spider-woman’s eyes briefly widened, and she took a moment to respond, “That’s ridiculous, Phoebe, was it?” She spun Phoebe in place, chuckling at her surprised squeal. “Is this a joke? Or has your little cult leader finally lost what’s left of her mind?”

“Hey!” Phoebe said defensively, “Lessie isn’t a cult leader, and she’s perfectly sane, right Gareth?”

“Sane to be sure,” Gareth said dryly.

The enormous lips facing him curled into a smile as Severa chuckled, “So is it true Human?” She asked, “are you here to ask my hand in marriage?”

“Yes,” he said, “It’s… complicated, but that’s why I’m here.”

“That’s hardly a romantic proposal,” She purred, “Tell me then, what makes things so… complicated?”

“Lessie can help explain,” he said, “If you would just tell us what you’ve done with her-“

Severa snapped her fingers and the purple flames popped into existence a bit higher up. Phoebe and Gareth both looked up to see Lessie’s massive form, wrapped in webbing from neck to tail like a caught fly. Her mouth lolled open and her eyes were glazed, her forked tongue hung limply.

Seeing their horrified expressions Severa chuckled and snapped her fingers again. The flames flickered out, covering Lessie’s trapped form in shadow once more.

“She’ll be fine,” Severa said, “She needed a lesson for stealing from me though. She spends too much time with her whelps, every now and then she needs to be reminded who the real queen of this swamp is.” She laughed at Phoebe’s shocked expression before turning to Gareth, “Now human, tell me everything.”

For the second time in as many days he found himself explaining his situation. He found it a bit difficult to continue, where Lessie had seemed sympathetic Severa laughed uproariously when he explained how he was betrayed.

“S-So they just left you to get eaten?” She laughed, “Oh that is SO typical of Elves!”

“Hey!” Phoebe squealed, “It was mean!”

Severa sighed, and with her fingers dancing over Phoebe’s wriggling form she wrapped the Lamia in a cocoon of fiber, unlike Lessie she kept going until Phoebe’s entire head was covered.

“I’ll just put this somewhere safe,” she chuckled, sticking the cocoon to the wall and ignoring the muffled sounds from within it. “Please continue.”

He nervously finished his tale. Severa’s amused expression began to disappear as he went into how Lessie had enforced his promise to marry Phoebe, and then added herself in as well… and Severa.

“This entire idea is ridiculous,” Severa said dismissively, “It’s absurd enough that Lessie thinks a marriage between a Lamia, no TWO Lamia, and a human will work. She’s treating this whole thing like something out of a human history book… or perhaps a fairy tale? I cannot tell with her anymore.”

“Lessie is… ambitious,” Gareth said slowly, “and I was hardly looking to get married when I left on this mission, but I… I think I’m happy with how it’s gone so far, I’m happy for where it’s going even.” He chuckled as he realized he was admitting it to himself almost as much as to her.

“Lamia sex is that good, is it?” The Arachne mused, more webs came down around him and he found himself suspended between her hands as she played a perverse game of cat’s cradle, lolling him to and fro with a simple flick of her fingers.

“T-that’s not-“ he struggled with words, getting slightly dizzy as she idly twirled him again.

“Go on, out with it boy,” she said with an amused smile. She was enjoying throwing him off balance, in several ways.

“I enjoy Phoebe’s company,” he said, forcing it out as she deliberately dropped him, dangling him upside down from a fingertip. “She’s kind to me, and if not for her I’d be dead in the swamp somewhere.”

“Oh?” Severa said in an amused tone, “And Lessie? You’ve married the big snake too, haven’t you?”

“Lessie may well be one of the most accomplished women I’ve ever met, Lamia or no,” he said firmly. “I don’t know WHY she wants to be my wife, but I don’t have any doubts that she knows what she’s doing, and may the gods help the Imperial court if she decides to take up politics.”

“A Lamia in human politics,” Severa laughed out loud, jostling him as he dangled, “I’m sure she’d fancy herself a real royal lady, with a fan and everything.” She sighed, “Well Gareth, let’s forget the delusions of grandeur and talk about you and I.”

With a flourish of her free hand, a claw appeared on the tip of her index finger. Gently she traced it down the webbing that held him in place, he heard snapping sounds as the thread was torn away from him, and the claw seemed to dip just a hair deeper when it reached his shirt. He screamed a moment later as the last of the webbing gave way, but he only fell about ten feet before the same hand that had cut him loose caught in him an open palm. He realized that Severa had been quite precise, his shirt was torn to ribbons, and he let it fall to the ground far below.

“What did you have in mind?” He asked, forcing himself to his feet. He found it hard to stay upright in a woman’s palm, but it was becoming a more familiar experience.

“You seem relatively innocent in all of this,” she said. “So I think I’ll let you go and simply have a long chat with Lessie and her underling there.” He felt eight eyes tracing over him hungrily, “I can see why the snakes like you though,” Severa muttered with a grin. He forced himself not to flinch as her giant finger traced down his chest. “For a human you’re taking being handled very well… most smaller races are just a blubbering mess once I start playing with them.”

A part of him wondered… should he try to entice her? Flirt with her even?

“It’s not so bad being played with by beautiful women,” he said, with what he hoped was a lecherous grin. “Poke and prod me all day if you’d like.”

She paused, her expression dancing between a smile and a frown. Gareth took some small satisfaction that he’d managed to throw this colossus of an Arachne off balance. He decided to press his luck.

“Or perhaps… you’d like me to try poking and prodding you a bit?”

Too far, she burst out laughing, and he was left trying to stay steady in her palm as his face went red with embarrassment. She collected herself and then peered down at the human in her palm, a slight blush on her own pale face.

“Just a fair warning human, you’re around the same size as my own specie’s males… they’re afraid of mating with us,” she giggled, “they prefer dainty little human girls I hear, we’re a bit too… rough. Don’t keep tempting me or-“

“The Lamia kept me going all night long,” he said, “both of them I mean, at the same time. I think I can handle you.”

He didn’t really believe that of course. His night with Lessie and Phoebe together had pushed him to his physical limits, and the two of them had gleefully used their trance powers to keep him going long after he would have stopped on his own accord. Still, he couldn’t let himself be separated from the two of them, and he supposed the plan had always been for him to consummate a marriage with the Arachne anyway.

On another level, one he was a bit embarrassed of, he’d discovered that he enjoyed being rendered powerless and overwhelmed by these women. Monstrous features included, Severa was a woman of intense beauty, and the prospect of tempting the hundred-foot Arachne into having her way with him was no longer the terrifying one it might have been a few days ago.

From the way her eyes narrowed and her smile spread he could tell he’d succeeded, “Bold words for a fly caught in my web,” she purred. Sticky threads were dropping from her hand again, his arms were webbed and with a few delicate movements he was as a puppet in her hands. Dangling him from her fingers like a chained prisoner she gleefully scuttled out of the antechamber and upwards, where another massive webbed tunnel led away.

They were shrouded in darkness, with none of the purple flames igniting to light their path. Gareth could see Severa’s enormous red eyes glinting in the dark, along with the occasional flash of her fangs as she smiled. At the end of the tunnel another room opened up, this one had no windows or openings, and was surrounded on all sides by webbing. Here the low purple flames did spring into life as she entered, and they illuminated a few items suspended haphazardly in the webbing, a bookcase, human sized oddly, a few bottles of various sizes, and a large treasure chest.

He gasped in shock as her free hand came up, the same claw as before traced down his pants, and a moment later they fell to the floor of the chamber in tatters.

“I-I could have taken them off!” he protested.

“I just love the sound your clothes make when they’re being ripped off you,” she rasped with glee, looking over his nude form.

Another pair of threads looped around his legs, and he found himself suspended once more between her hands. Her tongue darted out between her lips and licked him up the side of his body, coating him in her saliva.

“Oh that’s good,” she groaned. “I can’t wait any longer!” Her hands seemed to spin, and he was suddenly tied again, suspended from a single hand. Like a yo-yo she gently yanked, and he flew up into her waiting hand.

She began to lower him down, and when she reached her abdomen she paused, reaching down with her other hand she unbuckled something. Evidently whatever sleek black material the more human half of her wore it was a clothing, and it fell away from her lower body revealing her gaping and dripping womanhood.

Gareth was pushed forward, and he tried to take a breath before he was forced into the waiting flushed opening. He was surrounded by soft tissue, and he panicked as he realized that her fluids were gushing and filling the chamber. She groaned in pleasure as she forced him deeper, clearly enjoying his thrashing.

Finally he could hold his breath no longer, but as he exhaled and the liquid filled his lungs he realized… he wasn’t suffocating.

“Keep moving!” a voice growled from somewhere, it was muffled but he could clearly make out Severa’s annoyed tone.

He followed her instructions, and he gasped as her womanhood seemed to mold around him. Soon her heartbeat could be heard, like a steady drum, picking up as he went. He felt it closing around his member in the same way, and soon his motions were giving him as much pleasure as they gave her.

He cried out in pleasure, more of the fluid filling his lungs as the walls contracted around him in a vicegrip that rivaled anything he’d been put through so far. He couldn’t hear Severa as the heartbeat around him quickened, then slowed. He felt a pair of massive fingers grab his tied ankles and begin to pull him out.

He coughed as soon as he was back in the low light of her chamber. It was an odd cough, as though he was expelling water from his lungs but at the same time, he didn’t feel the burning feeling he normally would.

“That was wonderful Hum- Gareth,” she said with a pleased sigh. Noticing his continued coughing she giggled, “I suppose I should have warned you that my… fluids, are breathable. It wouldn’t do if our poor little males drowned trying to do their duty now would it?”

“No,” he rasped, once the last of the stuff was out of his lungs. The oily fluid still coated his naked body, and now that it wasn’t filling him he could smell the musky sweetness it gave off. “Still, yes I would have liked a warning.”

“Oh, but you thrashed around so well when you were holding your breath,” she pouted. A glint entered her eye suddenly, “Gareth… what do you know about spiders?”


“They’ve got eight legs and build webs,” he said. He stopped himself before calling them “devilish.”

“Do you know what happens to the male spider after mating?” she said. Her free hand appeared and with a flash of movement began webbing him up again.

“N-No,” he said nervously as his bound form was dangled closer to her face.

“The female is usually just FAMISHED,” Severa said, rubbing her stomach. As if in time he heard it rumble, the growl of her hunger echoed off the walls. “Particularly if the male has performed well… So, she eats him!” She laughed seeing his horrified expression, “Call it the reward for a job well done, and you’ve done a VERY good job Gareth.”

He shouted in terror as her mouth opened and she slowly lowered him in, suspending him by a single string of her thread. The world went dark as her lips closed behind him, and he began to panic again as her tongue forced him to the back of her mouth.

“SEVERA STOP!” he shouted, “WE CAN TALK ABOUT THI-“

He was cut off by powerful muscles squeezing him on all sides and forcing him downward, he heard the unmistakable sound of a gulp.

…And he was suddenly pulled back upwards, the thread holding his ankles bound had held. The mouth opened again, and he was once more dangling before the face of a very amused Severa.

“I’m sorry, but I just had to toy with you one more time,” she chuckled.

“Why does everyone in this swamp think it’s funny to pretend to eat me?” He asked, a bit annoyed.

“Because it IS funny Gareth,” she sighed contentedly, “Now, I didn’t lie about mating making a spider hungry, wait here while I get us some food.”

She casually tossed his still bound form into the webbed wall, where he stuck instantly. He could do nothing but wait as she scuttled back up the dark tunnel, a moment later she returned with a shockingly large piece of bread and a sausage the size of his entire body. He saw a claw extend again from her finger as she cut him loose, catching him in her palm and gently settling him on her large abdomen. Another flash of the claw and she was handing him a chunk of the meat that was the size of a feast day ham. With nothing else to do he took a bite, savoring the cured meat.

Like before with the alligator, he found he couldn’t recognize the meat. It was almost like pork, but it had a strange taste to it. He froze, it couldn’t be… she wouldn’t give him…

“Severa,” he said quietly, “You er… don’t eat humans right?”

She froze and glared at him, “I do not follow Lessie’s ridiculous Rules,” she snapped. Seeing his fearful expression she sighed, “I do not kill for sport, or enjoyment. Rest assured that those humans who met their end through me well and truly earned whatever happened.” Seeing his horrified expression she rolled her eyes, “That sausage is wild boar.”

They ate in silence for a moment after that, Gareth set his meat down and thought the matter over. Severa definitely was not “civilized” in the manner the Lamia were, why had Lessie proposed this?

“The Lamia seem to think you don’t like humans,” he said gingerly.

She paused, “Gareth,” she said softly, “We had a wonderful time together, but we can leave it at that. You don’t need to go through with whatever Lessie bullied you into.”

“That’s the thing,” he said slowly, “Lessie isn’t a fool, and I don’t think she wanted us together simply because she wants you to help us resolve this matter with the Elves.” He swallowed nervously seeing her dark expression but kept going, “I’m going to ask again, why don’t you like humans? Did we… hurt you?”

“No,” she muttered. She chuckled softly, “Gods above, I knew I would regret being friends with that snake…” She took a last bite of her bread and swallowed it down.

“We Arachne spend the first part of our lives at a much smaller size,” she said, “I wasn’t much bigger than your Lamia friend is now, the littler one, I mean… Phoebe I think her name was. Still larger than any human to be sure, but I had human friends.” She chuckled wistfully, “I was part of a party of adventurers if you can believe it.”

“Really?” he asked, “What backwards kingdom still has wandering adventurers?”

“It wasn’t anywhere near your empire that’s for certain,” she said, “But I got bigger as the years went on, I became a burden… So one day, I gathered them all around, and told them I had to leave.”

“How did they take it?” he asked quietly.

“They begged me to stay.” She blinked a tear out of one of her eyes, “We did have good times together, but I was bankrupting our group just feeding myself.” She chuckled, “Every time I would go near a town they’d send out knights and sound the alarm… my companions would always stick up for me, they almost got themselves killed after one particularly zealous group opened fire on all of us with crossbows. That was when I knew that I had to go. I was only thirty feet tall then, imagine how a human town would react seeing me approach now?”

“I’m sorry,” he said, “So… you don’t want humans to stay away because you hate them then?”

“No,” she muttered, “I can’t hate humans, you were some of my best friends. I want humans, and elves, and all settled peoples to stay away because they don’t belong in the wilds, no more than a monster belongs in civilization. Lessie’s dream is absurd, it’ll all end in tears.”

“It sounds like they all really cared about you,” Gareth said, thinking it over, “And you for them… Do you ever want to see your old party again?”

She just sighed, “A part of me somewhat hoped that they’d hear of this fortress I’ve built here, so far from where we lived, and then come to explore it one day.” She giggled, “They’d kick down the door ready to see a dragon or a werewolf, and I’d greet them with food and drink. For a little while at least it would be like it was back then.” Her face darkened, “But they’d have to go of course, it’s best for something like me to live out here…”

“No,” Gareth said, standing up, “I don’t think so.”

She blinked, “It’s not something I was asking your opinion on, you can’t HAVE an opinion on it it’s just a fact!”

“It’s not true at all!” he said, “Maybe you’re right, maybe you couldn’t be with your friends in that world, maybe they can’t be in this one you’ve made out here, but I don’t think Lessie is mad… I think we really could make something out here that works for the Lamia… and for you.” He drew himself up to his full height, still not particularly impressive to her, but it made him feel more confident. “You’ll see your old party again, and when they come, they’ll find that we’ve turned this swamp into a place that man, and monster, can call home.”

Severa stared at him a moment, then slowly smiled, “What about elves? Pixies even?”

He rolled his eyes, “I mean… I suppose, if they don’t break any rules or go around shrinking people-“ he saw her fighting down a laugh and scowled, “You’re making fun of me!”

“It’s hard not to Gareth,” she said, letting the laughter spill forward, “You’re so cute with your talk of squabble-free coexistence… Still, you seem genuine, and the gods love an earnest fool. I’ll join this marriage pact.”

His eyes lit up, “Really!?” he fought to contain his excitement, then dropped to one knee. “Severa,” he said breathlessly, “Will you marry me?”

Eight eyes rolled in unison, “Yes Gareth! Spare me the human courtship rituals, just call me your wife.” She paused a second and then groaned, “I’m going to have to talk to Lessie EVERY DAY now, aren’t I?”

“No going back now,” Gareth laughed. “Can you… maybe let them out now?”

…

Phoebe gasped and lashed her tail angrily as Severa cut through the threaded cocoon holding her in place. Severa slowly lowered her to the floor of the chamber where Gareth was waiting, without a word she slithered up to him and coiled around his body.

“Oh Gareth are you okay?” She asked eagerly, “I heard screaming-“

“It was a good screaming,” Severa chuckled.

Phoebe’s eyes went wide, “OH!” she giggled and ruffled Gareth’s hair, “Good work! I knew you could do it!” She noticed he was naked suddenly and she suddenly had a hungry look in her eyes, “Uhh… if you’re not spent yet Gareth-“

“Calm down snake,” Severa said with a laugh, “I can assure you I took good care of him.”

Phoebe frowned, and suddenly made direct eye contact with Gareth, “Gareth,” she said as the trance started, “Did you have fun?”

“It was fantastic,” he said dreamily, “I was so scared, but it just made everything that much more intense!” Phoebe nodded with approval and Gareth blinked as the trance broke.

“H-hey!” he protested, “You can’t just do that to me whenever you-“

“Ask him what my best feature is!” Severa asked suddenly.

“What’s Severa’s best feature?” Phoebe asked, her eyes flashing again.

“Her hair flows like water,” he said, “I like the way her eyes glitter, even the extra ones.”

“Wow,” Severa breathed. She looked down at Gareth longingly then collected herself and cleared her throat, “I’m uh… going to go get Lessie down.”

She descended a few minutes later with the larger Lamia slung over one arm, gently she set the groggy looking Lessie on the floor, and after a moment the larger Lamia groaned and sat up.

“What did I miss?” She muttered. “My head is killing me! Severa did you bite me?”

“You stole from me,” Severa said, her arms crossed, “And then you dropped a man on my doorstep and told him he had to marry me.”

“Well?” She asked expectantly. “Did you and Gareth…”

“They did!” Phoebe said excitedly, “It was great! I’m going to have to watch sometime!”

“What!?” Gareth and Severa both said in unison.

“It’s good to hear that SOMETHING went well,” Lessie muttered, rubbing her head, “but what about the proposal Severa?”

“I’ve agreed,” she said, “Though I still don’t appreciate how you did this Lessie.”

Lessie gave a smug smile, “Of course not, I’ll be more open with you in the future… after all we share a husband now.”

“I know this is a long shot,” Gareth said suddenly, “But Severa do you have any human clothes?” Seeing Lessie and Phoebe’s expression he sighed, “Severa saw fit to… tear my clothes off.”

Lessie’s eyes went wide, “Wow things must have REALLY gone well!”

“Let’s just keep him naked!” Phoebe said excitedly, “Come on Gareth Severa probably wants to see the goods!”

“Let me spin you some clothes,” the giant spider-woman chuckled. Phoebe just crossed her arms and huffed.

He was picked up in Severa’s hand and she began to spin the thread around him. Instead of binding him she delicately wove the threads around his form, creating a perfectly form fitting white outfit as she worked her way up his legs, then again down from his neck, creating a shirt.

She grinned at him, “Now watch what we can do while the threads are still attached…” she twitched her giant fingers ever so slightly, and he felt the silky material begin to rub across him in just the right way. He gasped as her fingers picked up speed, manipulating the thread and in turn the outfit she’d woven around him. He groaned as she brought him to climax, her laughter echoed as she slowly lowered him down to the ground before severing the strings.

“That was neat!” Phoebe said, “Hey Severa, watch this,” she slithered up to the groggy Gareth and coiled herself around him, before he could react, she grabbed his head and forced him to look up into her eyes, “Gareth you’re ready to go again!”

He gasped as he felt himself becoming erect, “Okay, now let’s just take a minute-“ he protested.

Lessie slithered up behind Phoebe, and for a moment he thought she was going to tell Phoebe to let him go, but she just grinned as her own eyes flashed.

“Gareth, you need to climax RIGHT NOW!”

He groaned as he came again, Phoebe’s coils holding him in place as he did.

“Gareth-“ Phoebe said eagerly, her eyes flashing onto his before he could look away, “You-“

Lessie laid a giant hand on her shoulder, “Phoebe we really should let this wait.” She chuckled as she saw the younger Lamia’s pouty expression. “Don’t worry we’ll have our share of fun with him later.”

“That was quite the display,” Severa muttered, stroking her chin, “So your trances can make a male… ready again? Just like that?”

“Mind over matter!” Phoebe giggled.

“It does eventually stop working,” Lessie said, “How long did it take the other night Gareth?”

“At least six hours,” he said, struggling out of Phoebe’s loosening coils. “I don’t really know for certain.”

Severa’s eyes went wide, then she laughed, “Oh you poor man Gareth! When this Elven business is done I’ll have to see that myself sometime.”

“Right,” he muttered, “And on that Elven business, what is our plan exactly? Should we just smash our way in and save the Queen?”

“Oh Gareth,” Lessie chuckled, “Let me handle that…”

…

Above the elven city the only light was the soft glow of torches. Most civilians had evacuated or hidden in their homes, outside the city the queen’s loyalists had gathered and their own campfires lit the hillside.

Romla watched from a balcony in the tower and laughed to herself, “I think your followers have decided they don’t have the numbers to storm the city your majesty.”

“My people are loyal,” The queen muttered. She was on her throne, a pair of rebel elves on each side. At least until the new moon arrived in full they had decided to let her sit on her throne.

“They are,” Romla admitted, skipping happily back into the throne room, “But by the time the rest of the kingdom even knows what’s happened you’ll be dead and your cousin will be sitting there.” Romla chuckled, “For getting rid of that Human of yours they’re going to let me watch when they kill you later tonight.”

“The new moon is not here yet,” The Queen said calmly.

“The gods don’t see without the moonlight,” Romla taunted, “you’ve nothing left your majesty, now try to summon the dignity you so eagerly threw at the human’s feet and spend your last hours with a bit of class.”

…

General Sylph looked at the city and swore angrily. The coup had worked, though the rebels only had a small portion of the military supporting them it was more than enough to hold the capital until the Queen’s execution. Then they’d have their own candidate on the throne, everyone would fall in line… no vengeance, no justice. She knew she would be kneeling and asking her for her own follower’s pardons by morning… the idea left a foul taste in her mouth.

“General,” one of her scouts shouted, running towards her so fast she nearly tripped over her bow.

“Calm down girl,” Sylph said, “What is it?”

“There’s a human envoy here!” She shouted excitedly, “h-he says he’s got reinforcements!”

“Impossible,” General Sylph said, “The only human anywhere near here is that fool who got himself killed in the swamps.”

“They’re approaching from the south General!” the scout said.

“There’s nothing but stagnant marsh in that direction until you reach the sea,” The general muttered. Had the humans somehow landed at the far end of the swamp and traversed it? No, it would take weeks!

There was commotion in the camp and alarm bells sounded, the general watched her well-disciplined elves ready their bows and spears. She peered into the darkness, hoping to get a look at what had set everyone to arms, and then gaped.

Lamia, hundreds of them in every color she could imagine. Not full grown, thank the gods, but still twice the height of any elf in her army. They slithered forward in formation, each wore a leather cap and had a massive longbow slung over their back. At least one of them, a red one, stood over the rest, at least as high as the city wall. The general’s mouth went dry as her gaze drifted higher, how had she not seen it? The Arachne that marched behind the Lamia was the largest she’d ever seen, the largest that ANYONE in the entire Kingdom had ever seen, the campfires caused her crimson eyes to dance, and as she loomed over the camp and the approaching Lamia Sylph very nearly gave the order to open fire.

“General,” A human voice called. Sylph tore her eyes off the monsters and gazed lower, at a human male. He wore a white material studded with rainbow colored armor, with a start the general realized that his mail was made of lamia scales, no doubt sourced from the mob that followed him. The only bit of human clothing that he seemed to have remaining was his belt, which held sword and pistol.

“G-Gareth,” Sylph gasped, “The human envoy? You’re alive!”

As he approached a pair of Lamia, the big red one, and a smaller green one, broke off from the rest and slithered at his sides.

“Alive and well,” he said grimly, “Is the Queen-“

“They won’t kill her until midnight,” the general said, “But it’s too late, and what in the name of the gods is going on out here?” She gestured at the Lamia, who waited a few dozen paces away, “You’ve dragged a mob of unruly monsters out of the swamp?”

“Hey!” the green Lamia exclaimed, “We’ve only been doing civilization for like twenty years! This is our first army!”

“A-Are they tame?” The elf asked quietly, looking up at Severa’s massive form nervously. The Arachne seemed to notice and aggressively licked her lips and smiled.

The larger Lamia sighed, “Gareth darling let me handle this, general could you look up here?”

General Sylph looked up at the red Lamia and only too late realized she’d made eye contact.

“You’ve been expecting us,” the Lamia said with a comforting smile, “I’m Lessie, the Lamia Queen, you want to turn over your command to me.”

“Of course,” The general said, she remembered now! It was so relieving to know that the reinforcements had finally arrived, “Everyone, all officers attention! The Lamia Queen is giving orders!”

There was some hesitation and General Sylph scowled, “Did I stutter? Runners, prepare to receive orders!”

Lessie coiled contentedly next to the general’s tent as a dozen elves nervously approached her.

“Come closer darlings, don’t worry I won’t bite… you anyway,” she chuckled at her own joke but it didn’t seem to put any of the elves at ease.

“Y-Your orders… your majesty?” one of the runners asked hesitantly.

At the “your majesty,” Lessie positively shivered with delight, “Order all units to prepare to storm the city,” she said gleefully.

“B-but we’re outnumbered heavily,” one of the elves protested, “And they’re entrenched!”

“Don’t worry about it,” Lessie said, “Your orders are to proceed with caution and secure the city block by block, also arrest and imprison any traitors you capture.”

The elves looked at each other doubtfully, “My own forces will spearhead the assault,” she said with a smile that showed her fangs, “You will have MANY looking to surrender.” The elves looked at her fearfully until she sighed, “Go! Get to it!” Like birds scattering after a falling tree the elves were off in all directions, and soon the camp was humming with activity.

“Is that wise?” Gareth asked her, “For the Lamia… for us to be leading the assault?”

Lessie sighed, “It’s a higher risk strategy, but we don’t have much time. Our best bet is to use terror.”

“I like it,” Severa said, grinning down, “I’m guessing I play a big part in this?”

“Indeed,” Lessie said, “do try to keep the body count low, these civil wars cause enough bad blood as it is.”

Severa snapped a finger and a fireball the size of a horse appeared in her massive hand, “I’ll do my best,” she said in a low voice.

“And what about me?” Gareth asked, “Am I leading the snakes through the front gate?”

Lessie laughed, “Oh no Gareth I’m not risking you there, Phoebe!” the younger Lamia stood at attention. “Once Severa takes the gate down I want you and Gareth to go straight to the palace, can you climb that tree there?” She pointed to the large tree in the center of the Elven city.

Phoebe squinted, “Yeah I think so, Gareth can probably hold on for a few minutes until we get in a window or something.”

“Wait we’re climbing it?” He asked.

“I’m not,” Lessie said with a chuckle, “I’m far too… curvy, for those branches.”

“Fat,” Severa mouthed behind her, Phoebe giggled and Lessie shot a quick angry glance back at the Arachne.

“There won’t be many defenders inside the palace,” Lessie said, “the two of you should make short work of any you find in there. You need to get to the Queen and get her somewhere safe. Once it’s clear the city has fallen, I believe the rebels will try to kill her regardless of the status of the moon.”

“You got it!” Phoebe said, hugging Gareth close.

“Right then,” Lessie muttered, “Let loose the snakes of war!”

…

A full-grown Lamia is a creature that, in human settlements, requires a response from either experienced parties of adventurers or the regular military. At over eighty feet long and with scales hard enough to deflect most steel weapons they are extremely formidable opponents physically. While their upper halves are more vulnerable, they are still extremely strong and fast. Reports from the field indicate that, with warning, they can catch crossbow bolts out of the air, and when enraged, can easily knock over city gates, turn a charging horse, or lift and toss cannons with ease. Other hazards include their poisonous fangs, which can incapacitate a man in minutes, and the notorious “Lamia gaze” which they can use to temporarily entrance targets at close range.

Lessie had added to her people’s already ample innate defenses by insisting that they all learn archery, and with the vision and agility of a Lamia they were natural studies. While she told the younger Lamia that it was for hunting the truth was that she’d always wanted the option to fight if the Elves, or anyone else for that matter, came for her and her Queendom. Lessie’s Lamia were not full grown as she was, but despite their sheltered living and relative naivete on the matters of war they were some of the most dangerous fighters on the planet.

Lessie herself had only ever skimmed a book on military tactics, she’d been quickly bored and had left it in her tent to gather dust while she reread romance novels and the occasional history text instead. Still, with three hundred Lamia at her command, backed by a hundred-foot Arachne sorceress, she didn’t exactly need to be a tactical genius.

For their part the rebel Elves were well trained, disciplined, and believed themselves ready for anything the loyalist army would throw at them. A terror attack of shock and awe was mostly unheard of in Elven warfare though, and when the gate exploded and the first hundred hissing snake-women surged through the elves very quickly found their formations and defensive lines collapsing. Not even a single volley was managed before the walls fell.

Throughout the battlefield the loyalist forces attempted to march out to retake areas of the city that were rapidly falling as their lines collapsed, but webbing flew down and they found themselves bound and dangling from the massive tree canopies of their city. Severa easily leapt between them, scurrying and webbing as she went. She laughed as a group of elven mages hurled fireballs at her, she caught them easily in her hand, and after muttering a few incantations to dramatically increase the size, sent them back the way they’d come.


…

“Romla we’ve got to evacuate the palace!” one of the elves shouted, “The Queen’s people have already retaken half the city!”

“That’s impossible!” she shouted, “it’s got to be a trick!”

An explosion echoed outside and Romla ran to the window, her eyes went wide as she saw an Arachne, at least a hundred feet tall, tearing a defensive fort apart with her bare hands. Romla’s hands were shaking as she backed away, this couldn’t be happening!”

“Sky!” she shouted, calling her pixy to her, there was a flash of pink as the fey landed on her shoulder.

“What’s up boss?” She asked.

“Things have taken a turn,” she said, “We’re not playing with superstition and ritual another minute, let’s kill the queen and-“

There was the sound of a window shattering and the two of them looked down the hall to see glass skittering across the floor. A figure leapt through it and the two of them gaped as they saw Gareth, the human they’d left for dead in the swamps just a few days earlier. He spotted them and drew his sword.

“Fancy meeting a pair of traitors like you here!” He snarled, drawing his sword.

“What in the name of the gods are you wearing?” Romla asked.

“Spun silk and Lamia scales,” he replied, “A bit garish for my taste but they’re harder than steel.”

Behind him a green haired face peeked in, and with lightning speed a Lamia slithered in and coiled in a defensive pose next to the human with a readied bow.

“I suppose this madness is your doing?” Romla said, drawing a pair of curved knives. “An army of pet Lamia, and what is that spider thing doing here? Did you offer her gold or just a human princess to snack on later?”

“Excuse me!?” Phoebe said in an offended tone, “That is his WIFE out there! Show a little respect!”

The elf paused, “The Arachne is your…” She blinked, “Humans are so depraved!”

“Don’t call my husband depraved!” Phoebe shouted.

“Wait, you too?!” she asked weakly.

“Damn,” Sky muttered, fluttering her wings slightly, “It sounds like the human gets up to some pretty wild stuff, maybe I’m on the wrong side?” She giggled, “Hey Gareth, with you and the spider-lady how do you-“

“Enough!” Romla shouted. She charged forward, screaming a battle cry. Gareth fell back, blocking her blows. The pixy laughed and veered for him, and for a minute he worried he’d be shrunk again, but Phoebe grabbed her out of the air.

“Not this time!” she shouted. Turning back to her husband she saw he was evenly matched, waiting for her opening she struck, her fangs out, biting Romla just on the shoulder.

“Burning hells!” she screamed, flinching away. She spun towards the Lamia but her eyes were already drooping as the poison took effect. She tried to raise her knives but she was already too weak, and a moment later they clattered to the floor, followed by her slumping form.

“Romla!” the pixy said in a panic.

“I only gave her enough venom to knock her out,” Phoebe said, slithering past the collapsed elf, “Lessie said we shouldn’t kill them unless we had to.”

The two of them continued through the hallways until they came to a large door, ornately carved with scenes of Elves, trees, and the moon overhead. Gareth tried it, and wasn’t surprised to find it was bolted shut from the other side.

“The throne room is through there,” he said, gesturing at the door, “I think it’s where the Queen will be.”

Lessie gave the door a shove herself, a brilliant bright light flashed and pushed her back. She screamed and rubbed her shoulder where it had made contact.

“So how are we getting in?” she asked, rubbing her shoulder gingerly.

“You can’t!” the pixie said, squirming in Phoebe’s hand, “It’s magically sealed. Let me go! I’ll just fly away I promise!”

Phoebe studied the door, then brightened, “Look up there Gareth, there’s a little hole leading into the next room!”

“That’s a pixy door!” Sky said, “it’s just for us, you’re too big to get in.”

Phoebe glanced at the pixy and then at Gareth, his eyes widened, “Oh no, we’ll find another way in-“

“Pixy, shrink Gareth for me,” Phoebe ordered.

“What!?” Sky exclaimed, “No way!” let me go.

With a sigh Phoebe brought the pixy up to her mouth, “Oh well, since we can’t get in I’ll just snack on this yummy little pixy.”

Sky screamed as Phoebe’s forked tongue rapped around her, drawing her past the Lamia’s smirking lips. She closed her mouth for a minute and Gareth could hear the muted screams.

“Okay now Phoebe,” he said gently, “don’t you think she’s had enough?”

Phoebe just smirked, refusing to open her mouth she shook her head, “No.”

The pleading continued from in Phoebe’s mouth until Gareth sighed, “We both know you won’t REALLY eat her. Am I going to have to pry her out?”

Phoebe giggled and finally opened her mouth, uncoiling her tongue from the panicked Pixy as she spat her back out into her hands. Sky’s defiant attitude was gone, she was soaked in spit and shaking.

“Now will you shrink Gareth for me?” Phoebe asked sweetly.

“Y-Yeah,” Sky muttered, “J-Just give me a minute.”

“It’s too bad you humans can’t have pixy dust Gareth,” Phoebe commented, licking her lips, “it really is one of the best seasonings. Sky shuddered.

“I’m still not sold on this plan,” Gareth said, “What am I supposed to do in there at a few inches tall?”

“There will be a spell circle,” Sky said, “Just break it somehow, maybe mess it up, I don’t know.”

“Sounds good,” Phoebe said eagerly, “Now make him tiny!”

Sky flew towards Gareth and began circling him, raining the golden dust down on him that he remembered from before. He felt the itching over his body as his clothes expanded around him, his belt and weapons clattered to the floor, and a moment later he stood naked inside his own shirt collar. The pixy hovered down next to him, standing just a head taller than him.

“You cut a nice figure human,” she smirked, looking over his nude form. “If you ever want to have some fun sometime-“

“Hey!” Phoebe shouted. A pair of giant hands grabbed both of them, and soon both of them were held in front of Phoebe’s fuming face, “Look here Pixy, you stay away from him! You’re bad news!”

“Oh so you can share your human with a hundred foot spider, but not with me?” Sky teased, some of her defiance was coming back, “Whatever snake, just let me go!”

“Severa is nice,” Phoebe rebuked, but she did release the pixy, who fluttered around her hesitantly.

Phoebe reared up on her tail, easily giving herself the height to reach the small portal at the top of the door. She placed Gareth in it and let herself back down.

“Okay Gareth as soon as you get the door open I’ll bust in there and coil up any of the rebels that are left!”

“Let’s hope so,” he muttered. He remembered being chased by Romla the first time he’d been shrunk, dodging a pair of elven boots the size of a wagon didn’t appeal to him. He crept along the small tunnel meant to allow Pixies easy movement through the palace, it did open in the next room but he soon found another problem. Pixies, unlike humans, could fly, and the pixy door opened a good ten feet off the ground.

“Need a hand?” He turned and saw Sky flutter next to him.

He raised his fists defensively, “Whatever you’re thinking-“ he began, but she placed a finger over his lips to silence him.

“So it’s pretty clear your side is going to win this,” Sky said, “and I’m looking to jump ship and land on the winning team.”

He thought a minute, “Fair enough,” he muttered, “So what, you’ll fly me down there?”

“Not quite,” Sky said with a devious grin, “I think I want in on this marriage pact thing you’re doing.”

“Absolutely not,” he said firmly, “I’m not going to be bullied into ANOTHER marriage.”

Sky rolled her eyes and looked down into the throne room, “Uh oh, those elves sure look jumpy.”

Peering down Gareth scowled, she was right. The pair of remaining rebel soldiers did look jumpy, and at the sounds of battle outside they inched towards the Queen. For her part the Elven Queen was projecting a look of calm, even as the soldiers began talk of executing her.

“The loyalists must have launched a surprise attack,” one of the soldiers said to her partner, “We should just kill the Queen, then they’ll stop!”

“B-But the new moon isn’t for another hour!” the other protested, “Do you really want to kill her when the Gods can see?”

“Do you really believe in that stuff?” The first one muttered, “I don’t know about the Gods but we’ll be hung as traitors if that army makes it up here and she’s still alive!”

The queen’s façade was starting to shatter, and as Gareth and Sky watched she swallowed nervously and began fidgeting with the edge of her armrest.

“Gods damn you,” Gareth muttered, “Fine, I agree to your terms.”

“Yes!” Sky practically danced, “Now come here cutie!” she looped her arms under his, and with a flutter they lifted off the ground. Gently she flew them down close to the floor and they landed behind a carved wooden pillar while the guards continued their argument.

“There’s the circle,” Sky said, pointing to a ring of salt with a few burning candles at the edges. “Just mess up the circle or knock one of the candles over and your snake will be able to get the door open.”

The two of the crept quietly towards the circle, Gareth glanced in the direction of the throne and briefly made eye contact with the Queen. So she saw them at least, but while her eyes went wide she said nothing, letting the guards continue to talk.

“I’m just saying if we kill her now we are screwed, even if we get her cousin on the-“ The elf blinked, spotting movement out of the corner of her eye. “Hey!”

Sky and Gareth froze, the Pixy reacted first, “Look comrades!” she said, pointing him, “I’ve shrunk and captured this human!”

“Where’s Romla?” The first guard asked angrily. The two stepped away from the throne and began walking towards them. Gareth swallowed nervously as he looked up at the massive elves approaching them.

“She’s organizing the defenses,” Sky said quickly, “I uhhh… caught this guy, and now he’s tiny.”

“What are you doing in the middle of the floor?” The guard asked, “Why didn’t you just-“

Gareth sighed and without giving them a chance to come to the natural conclusion, that Sky had betrayed them, he sprinted as fast as his tiny body could carry him towards the magic circle.

“Hey!” the elves shouted, they rushed forward, and Gareth could hear the massive boots on the ground behind him.

With a shout he leapt into a full body tackle of one of the burning candles. It shook, and a moment later the wax candle fell to the ground. There was a shower of sparks around the salt circle and a smell of ozone, the spell was broken.

“Now Phoebe!” he shouted as loud as he could.

He heard the Lamia crash into the barred door, buckling it on the hinges. It was as he’d feared, it would still take Phoebe a minute or two to break the door down even without the magic. He looked up at the approaching, and infuriated, giant elves.

“You’re paste human!” One said lifting her boot.

He braced himself, but there was a flash of pink and suddenly he was being lifted off the ground. Sky was struggling to carry him and grunting with exertion as she wove in between the Elven soldiers legs. Her wings fluttered and they crashed to the floor just behind the elves.

“The pixy’s flipped!” One of the elves shouted angrily. The door rattled again as Phoebe continued trying to knock it down.

“Sorry about this Gareth,” Sky muttered, “But I think I’m going to need to do some fancy flying, and you’re just to heavy right now.”

Before he could react she threw a handful of gold dust in his face, he coughed and tried not to panic as he felt the familiar shrinking sensation. A second later Sky, the tiny pixy who could ride on an elf’s shoulder, was standing over him.

She bent down to pick him up in her hand and smirked, “From the other side this is kind of fun!” She glanced up at the approaching elves and cursed under her breath. “All right human, hold on!” she stuffed him between her breasts, and the pink orbs held him in place as she quickly pulled a pair of strings on the back of her dress, tightening it and smothering him.

She flittered off as an Elven boot came down where they had been standing just a moment before. She weaved between their legs again, easily rising in the air this time. With a triumphant laugh she did a barrel roll, Gareth shouted as he slipped, but with one hand she firmly shoved him back into her cleavage.

A crash reverberated through the room as Phoebe finally knocked the door clean off it’s hinges. The elves turned in shock, but by the time they could raise their weapons Phoebe was already on them. They were coiled, and then like Romla a quick bite to each of their shoulders and then they quickly passed out.

“Is that all of them?” Phoebe asked the Queen, who seemed a bit shaken.

“I…” She cleared her throat, “Yes that is all of them. Thank you Miss… Lamia.”

“No problem, I’m Phoebe your majesty!” she said, uncoiling and letting the two knocked out guards fall to the floor. “Hey did you see a human come in here? I shrank my husband Gareth so he could sneak in and-“

“Husband?” The queen asked, her brow furrowing, “Gareth? The human envoy?”

“Yeah, we haven’t been together long, but I’m really growing attached to him!” She said eagerly, “Don’t take this the wrong way your majesty but storming your palace was the most fun I’ve ever had.”

“Right here!” Sky called, hovering down to the floor. She pulled Gareth out of her breasts and triumphantly held him up.

Phoebe was always bigger than him, and Gareth had been shrunk around her before… but now? Double-shrunk? She was a mountain. She leaned down to the tiny pixy and narrowed her slitted eyes.

“Gareth? WOW!” she laughed, the vibration shaking his body, “You’re REALLY small now!”

“It’s cool right?” Sky said, “And I can make him this size any time you want!”

Phoebe frowned, “What do you mean?”

“I’m going to be his wife too!”

“WHAT!?” Phoebe said, rearing up angrily, “Oh no no no! Lessie is going to hear about this!”

“It’s what it cost to get my help!” Sky protested, “I don’t think it’s unfair at all.”

“Imagine demanding a marriage to do the right thing,” Phoebe groused.

“Actually-“ Gareth started.

“She can’t hear you,” Sky said with a shrug, “You’re way too small.”

“Are you at least rich or something?” Phoebe asked, arms crossed.

“Heavily indebted actually!” Sky said with a smug smile.

“I’m sorry,” The elf queen said, “I’m very confused, could someone please explain to me what’s going on? I would like to properly thank my rescuers.”

“And you’ll have ample opportunity!” Lessie called, the outer hallway was filled by her massive form suddenly. She was clearly struggling to maneuver in the palace designed for elves, thankfully it had high ceilings. She managed to duck under the ruined doorframe and, in the large open hall of the palace was able to draw herself up to her full height. Behind her a dozen Elven soldiers followed, and took up positions around the room.

“A-Are you also with Gareth?” The elven queen asked hesitantly.

“His second wife, yes,” Lessie said proudly. “I am Lessie, Queen of the Lamia!”

“I really like Matriarch better Lessie,” Phoebe said, but she went silent when the older Lamia glared at her.

“Second wife?” The Queen sat back in her throne in shock.

“And don’t forget his third,” Severa’s voice echoed outside the hall as her eye filled one of the large glass windowpanes.

Another elf entered the room suddenly, General Sylph breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the Queen.

“Your majesty,” she began, “I know it’s… unorthodox, but these monsters drove the rebels before us!”

“Indeed,” The queen said, in almost in a stupor, “I must admit I had begun to prepare myself for death… Thank you, all of you.”

“All thanks to this guy!” Sky said, holding up Gareth’s tiny form.

Everyone in the room peered, trying to see what the Pixy was holding in her hand. Gareth sighed and waved.

“I’d hoped to make a more dignified show of things,” he muttered.

“Too bad,” Sky teased, “So… the big Lamia is kind of running this thing, right?”

“More than I’d care to admit,” Gareth said.

“Could you uh… put in a good word for me with her?”

…

With the coup foiled order was quickly restored in the Elven capital and in the rest of the kingdom. The coup plotters were all rounded up and arrested, and the human officials who had arranged for Gareth’s lack of preparation were also implicated and dealt with. For the Empire it was a massive boon, a relatively minor member of the nobility had not only restored their ally to her throne, he had made a new alliance with a powerful faction of civilized Lamia.

“Gareth look,” Phoebe said excitedly, reading the latest letter that had arrived from the imperial capital, “You’ve been added to the list of the Emperor’s honorary brothers!”

“Great,” He muttered, leaning back on the cushion in Lessie’s tent, “Add it to the others.”

A pink blur went by, “The elves gave you the title of Guardian of the forest too!” Sky said excitedly.

“I’m giving you title of Swamp Knight,” Lessie muttered, not even bothering to look at them as she read her own letters from the human Emperor, “I won’t have all these other monarchs giving you extra titles without me.”

Gareth groaned and sat up, “Swamp Knight? What in the god’s name is a swamp knight?”

“I don’t know,” Lessie muttered absently, “Protect the swamp, or something.”

“As you wish,” Gareth muttered, picking himself up and walking out of the tent.

…

With the new road getting to Severa’s dungeon wasn’t nearly the ordeal it had been a few months prior. He was able to walk the distance in fair amount of time, and he passed a number of Lamia, and even elves, on the way. A lot of construction had begun since the first round of human “Husbands” had arrived. As it turned out it hadn’t been difficult at all for the Empire to find men willing to marry the Lamia, the treaty had been easily satisfied.

He walked up to the massive entrance, and as it had before the fires lit automatically as he entered.

“Severa!” He called, but instead of a response like he expected he heard chatter and laughter from the main antechamber. His brow furrowed as he continued. When he finally reached the center of the structure he found Severa, hanging a few feet off the ground, chatting and laughing with an odd group.

“Severa?” He repeated.

“Gareth!” She said excitedly, “This is my old adventuring party! They heard about everything and they traveled all the way here!”

“Pleased to meet yah lad!” A grizzled berserker with an axe over his shoulder said with a wave.

“You’d best be treating our girl well!” A halfling holding a harp joked, “She’s very delicate!”

They all laughed, “Please,” An elven mage said when they were done, “We all know she carried us!”

“Literally, a few times!” Severa laughed.

“Someone pour me some wine,” Gareth said, walking to join them, “I think I need to hear some of these stories.”

…

Gareth von Berger is considered by historians to be one of the Empire’s greatest heroes. His clever marital alliances secured a powerful army which he then used to turn the tide of history, he is also regarded as a father of the Lamia Queendom, which stands as one of the Empire’s proudest partners to this day. The Elves have their own accounts of him, which portray him as a somewhat bumbling, but well-intentioned man who saved their Queen in a moment of peril. He was often called into the service of three nations which had found himself bound to, and the Human Empire, the Elven Kingdom, and the Lamia Kingdom sent him to the far corners of the world pursuing their interests at various points in his life.

Lessie, the first Lamia Queen, transformed the southern marshes from a barren swampland into a vibrant and populated landscape. Word of her success spread, and soon Lamia from all over the world were arriving to swear loyalty to her, and she proudly proclaimed she would find husbands for every one. “The Rules,” the guiding principles which she had codified for Lamia behavior, where quickly scrutinized, and then accepted by the Imperial church as well as a number of smaller denominations. There is to this day debate on canonizing her as a saint, though the odd commandment on sleeping in on Saturdays still gives theologians pause. She had one daughter, who succeeded her as Queen.

Sky the Pixy was one of Gareth von Berger’s wives who was most often seen with him while traveling. While popular in the Imperial capital for her tendency to buy drinks for entire taverns she enjoys a mixed reputation in higher society circles. Rumor has it she would often encourage women to dose their husband’s drinks with Pixy dust, often claiming that it would “spice up marriages.” Pixy dust antidotes tended to be in short supply wherever she went, the reader is left to draw their own conclusions as to her activities in human settlements. Her lineage is unknown past the first generation, as Pixies do not care to keep records of such things.

Severa the Arachne served as chief mage for the fledgling Lamia kingdom. She began offering to share her knowledge with anyone who wished to learn it, and her tower became a common point of pilgrimage for anyone in the Elven, Human, or Lamia nations that wished to learn the mystic arts. Her offspring are known to have settled on the outlying shores of the Swamps, and while they live apart from other peoples, they are quite welcoming to travelers.

Phoebe the Lamia, the first of Gareth von Berger’s wives, was offered titles and honors by three kingdoms, though all who knew her agree she didn’t care much. Along with Sky, the Pixy, she was most commonly seen with Von Berger during his travels, and she is a regular figure in the stories written about those adventures. Her cheer and enthusiasm would guide Von Berger, and his other wives, through dark times like a lighthouse in a storm. Her lineage is quite widespread in the Lamia kingdom.

Historian’s Note: While it is widely rumored that Gareth von Berger and his wives coauthored “Recreational Use of Pixy Dust: Size Changing in the Bedroom” There is no firm evidence or admission of this. The reader is left to form their own opinion, but THIS author reminds them that before they give in to tabloid innuendo the parties involved are heroes to multiple kingdoms.