Summary: An experimental drabble written just for the heck of it.
Categories: Adventure Characters: None
Growth: Brobdnignagian (51 ft. to 100 ft.)
Shrink: Minikin (3 in. to 1 in.)
Size Roles: None
Warnings: None
Challenges: None
Series: A Bizarre New I.D.E.E.A.
Chapters: 30
Completed: Yes
Word count: 17043
Read: 166652
Published: January 21 2010
Updated: March 10 2010
Chapter 2 by Carycomic
Author's Notes:
UPSTATE NEW YORK
AUGUST 7, 2009
* * * * *
The young man was known on the Internet as "Jolly Roger" (or "J-Rog," for short) because of his computer piracy skills. He turned on the pc in his office, and waited for it to warm up. Half-humming/half-singing his favorite "Weird Al" Yankovic parody as he did so.
"Everything's a conspiracy...in its own way. La-dee-da-deed-da-dee-da. Da-da-da-da! Dee-doooooooo!"
When the computer was finally ready, he typed in his screen name and began checking his e-mail box for the latest contributions to "Theparanoidsareright.com." He smiled as he noticed that almost all of them were from his favorite contributor, screen-named "Doc Kraepelin."
The first one read: "Insta-message me, ASAP! It's a matter of life-and-death. Literally!"
All the other messages were repeats of the first, with the link-up line color-coded in blue. So, he hit "enter" on the first link and waited for Doc's avatar (the caricature of a balding, middle-aged man in a straight jacket) to appear.
The wait was barely two seconds long.
J-ROG: "Hey-hey! What do you say, Dr. K?"
DOC K: "Oh, Thank God! It's finally you."
J-ROG: "Who else were you expecting? The Fuller Brush Man?"
DOC K: "I'm serious, J. I think I'm in real trouble, this time."
J-ROG: "How so?"
DOC K: "I went to this new restaurant, out here. Wishbone's? And, there was a special item on their lunch menu that advertised it as coming with one magical wish. So, just for a lark, I ordered it. When I had finished it, I half-seriously wished to know the truth behind the Kecksburg UFO incident. And, you'll never guess what happened."
J-ROG: "So, don't waste my time, making me guess. Tell me, already."
DOC K: "I had a retrocognitive vision! And, it revealed to me that the UFO wasn't extra-terrestrial, in origin. It was _extra-dimensional!_ "
J-ROG: "WTF???!"
DOC K: "It's true! And, the crew of that ship--killed on impact, btw--were a humanoid man and woman, who had come here looking to shrink and enslave some of us as pets!!"
J-ROG: "Doc, have you been sniffing empty push-cream cans, again?"
DOC K: "Would you clam up and listen!!!? The vision I had somehow alerted the people these two humanoids worked for. They know I know that they exist. And, they might be coming for me, even as we speak! So, if something happens to me, I want you to have a copy of the proof I've amassed. Do you have a DVD handy for burning?"
J-ROG: "Sure thing. Give me a moment."
A few seconds later, Jolly Roger announced that the down-loading was complete. But, at first, there was no reply.
J-ROG: "Doc? You still there? I said, I'm all finished. Doc? Doc?!"
Almost immediately, he got this chilling reply.
VOREX: "I'm sorry, sir. But, the doctor is busy, right now. Satisfying my hunger pangs!"
tbc?
End Notes:
"Everything Is Beautiful," by Ray Stevens, copyright 1970.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.