[Report This]Date: July 30 2023 7:44 AM Title: Chapter 3: Traveling Light
Awwww, chapter 3 was beautiful! I only today discovered there was more than the first chapter, and I'm so happy!
It was amazing seeing their thoughts on their own feelings, their thoughts on each other's feelings...
And it was wonderful watching them both develop, and seeing more about the vampire species! You've crafted a wonderful and unique fantasy world here, with species resembling existing ones but such a novel take on them- the inability of certain creatures to enter human houses being a human magic and not a weakness of those species was incredibly interesting, in particular.
Date: February 15 2023 3:14 PM Title: Chapter 3: Traveling Light
This is really cool. I can't remember the last time I read a giantess story that was a romance.
[Report This]Date: August 31 2020 5:34 AM Title: Chapter 3: Traveling Light
Knocking it out the park once again with this chapter.
In G/t storytelling, I'll enjoy the occasional strictly smut story, but what really drives my interest is solid plot and character development. You're doing an excellent job on that front with Leo and Vela.
While in general, "love at first sight" is such a cliche trope, when paired with an enticing story hook it can be a joy to read. Leo and Vela have a shared history of almost profound loneliness, and are both reeling from the abandonment of the humans they depend on to live. Their meeting was serendipitous, and definitely sparked a romantic interest in each other.
As for the level of description for the love scenes; I've actually found that being more restrained in the level of detail makes the read more enjoyable. I've come across stories where the details provided in the sex scenes was almost downright tedious to read. You can get a lot more across with careful selection of the details, than just going all out and describing everything. Gotta leave some of it up to the reader to imagine and fill in the blanks, or else you're liable to lessen the immersion.
Alright, now on to the chapter's story content. I really like the lore you're developing here. You've really expanded on the world here in this chapter, confirming the existence of a few specific magical creatures and implying the existence of quite a few more. The world this story is in is becoming more colorful with each passing chapter.
Final note: It's a good thing it's completely pitch dark in that makeshift burrow, so Leo doesn't have to see how absolutely covered in dirt Vela must be.
Author's Response:
First of all, thank you for his exquisitely detailed follow up review. It's a wonderful thing to wake up to on a Monday!
I totally enjoy the occasional, strictly smut story. The last one I posted *was* one. I tried to be deft in my execution of it, but that story was just literary pornography. It was fun, but in terms of world and character building, it was rather limiting. I didn't know where to go wirh it besides "scenarios," so I apologize to anyone who was looking forward to a third "case." It might be a while.
Bear in mind this was intended to be a one-chapter short story before you compliment me in adequate execution of the "love at first sight" trope. I think it's turning out somewhat gracefully, but I still doubted whether I should do it. But the mutual loneliness and "down for anything" attitudes were necessary character aspects to make the vore short in the first chapter make sense. Then, when people liked the characters, I tried to imagine how those personality traits would pair with their mutual experiences, and how what they had done together might impact them emotionally. I pulled the trigger on it.
As for your next points about detail and immersion, this seems like a two chapter review of both 3 and 4, if I'm not mistaken. Just trying to be clear. But I take your points well, and I really appreciate that specificity in what I think is a response to the little chapter notes I made. I'm certainly not at all shy about writing very explicitly, but that wasn't the point with this story, so I was worried about how much was enough and what was too much. I'm glad that my careful aim on that was appreciated by someone.
And thank you! I'll go ahead and say here, "The Wildernest" was a world I had been building for a long time in the form of an abandoned project. Decided to write this world within the confines of one for which I've already done some heavy lifting. It's fun just being allowed to allude to things I've already established for myself but not for the reader. That's all I'm gonna say for now.
Your final note made me laugh. I'm so glad you called me out for that. It occurred to me to describe her getting cleaned up, and I just thought "do I need to give her an ability for everything like a Swiss Army knife, or will the reader just forgive me and assume the dirt was relegated to her clothes." I got lazy and you nailed me on it. So thanks for that. Haha!