Date: July 28 2021 2:51 AM Title: Chapter 12: A Brief Review
What a fantastic series! It's impossible to not love all the characters, and the rhythm and balance between advancing the plot, developing the characters, and delivering some steamy chapters is immaculate. Looking forward to more!
Thanks a ton for that review! It's difficult to strike just the right balance of smut and story to make sure you're actually invested in the characters enough that their romantic trysts are compelling, but so you're also entertained by smut if that's what you're primarily here for! So I'm really glad to hear you approve of the execution.
No need to wait! Just posted a monster of a chapter!
Date: May 05 2021 11:46 AM Title: Chapter 12: A Brief Review
Really glad this story is backed. Been missing it.
Thanks! Equally glad to see you back in the reviews! I've got a lot on my plate right now, but I'm already started on the next chapter!
Thanks! Equally glad to see you back in the reviews! I've got a lot on my plate right now, but I'm already started on the next chapter!
Date: May 02 2021 1:18 AM Title: Chapter 12: A Brief Review
It's great to have you back! I kind of lost hope for a second there, so it's fantastic hear that you'll be continuing this.
It always gets darkest before the dawn? Haha. Glad to dispel your concerns. I took the time necessary to organize how I'd like to make the story move to the original desired end and how to keep it interesting from where I left off. Now that the gears are turning again I should be able to keep from another big freeze!
Thank you for your kind words!!
Date: May 01 2021 12:14 AM Title: Chapter 1: Unlikely Friends
What a wonderful story! I've enjoyed it a lot so far. You've got a lot of great stuff going for you~
-A fantastic writing style
-Adorably charming characters
-An interesting plot
More than anything else, though, I just always love to see a plot and character-driven gentle story, as it's by far my favorite type of story on this website. I hope you'll keep it up, as I'm looking forward to more! Take care.
Thank you so much! Each of those bullets made me happier than the last! And I'll be honest: when I first set out to continue this story past chapter 1, I was a little worried it would be too much plot for people's taste and I'd bore everyone, but that is decidedly not the case! Turns our people enjoy relatable characters and dialog interacting in long form story arcs! (If anything, my characters are all probably about 15% too lewd?) And I personally thought there was a gap in the long-form, gentle, vore market, so I sought to address that.
I couldn't help but notice you're not idle yourself in writing longer plot-based stories. I'll have to check them out!
Thanks so much for the kind words, Pluto. I'm glad you've enjoyed the story so far. I hope to keep your interest!
Date: April 30 2021 7:57 PM Title: Chapter 12: A Brief Review
Welcome back.I'm glad you're writing again.
I liked this chapter very much.
Please continue this amazing story.
Thank you, Bartek! Good to be back! And a welcome back to you as well! It's always a pleasure getting feedback from you. I'm glad you liked the chapter. I'm already working on the next one slowly but surely!
Date: April 06 2021 1:59 PM Title: Chapter 1: Unlikely Friends
I read your story back when you published the first chapter, and loved it. I loved the premise, the excecution, and the characters. I read it, loved it, and moved on thinking it was finished. I was pleasantly suprised to see this story pop up as I scrolled, but with UPDATES.
Your worldbuilding is great (especially considering this is, at its core, a vore story), and your characters are charming, memorable, and realistic. Well, not the whole fantastical creatures part, but the believable emotions and characteristics. Vela and Leo play off one-another and make an adorable pair that I love to read. Jackie is cute and the Naga scare me (remorseless murder-by-vore (Though, I guess I just dislike that stuff in general)). The different takes and renditions of classic monsters are refreshing too.
You don't let the story devolve into endless smut or fetish material, which is nice, and you also avoid layering too much non-sexytimes into the plot all at once. You struck a decent balance.
I hope to see this story update as the year trudges along, but I also hope you only return to it when you're ready to write. I know what you mean about writing burnout (I lost most of January writing waaaay too much), and it ain't a joke.
5 Stars, 10/10: One of the best stories on this site.
I don't think I can fully convey how gratifying it was to have started my day with this review (yesterday, that is, but I didn't have time to respond properly). Seriously. I could feel your sincere enthusiasm bleeding through every word. It felt really good, and especially since I haven't updated this story in six months and am therefore never expecting continued feedback, this surprise dose of praise was extremely welcome!
The world building came somewhat easily because I had already laid some foundations in another, as of yet unpublished story in the same universe. When I stalled on that, and my mind turned to this one-off vampire vore story I had always wanted to write, and people liked it enough that I wanted to continue it, it was "easy" to just think to myself, "her world is in that one too," and proceed. We'll see if I can't keep it all straight!
But you're right. This is primarily "just a vore story." And vore (soft, preferably willing and nonfatal) is my primary kink associated with size stuff. So, how many times and in how many ways can I do it so as to keep it fresh and sexy before it turns dull and repetitive for the characters AND for me? Hence the tough balance with plot and smut. But I also don't want to go TOO long between sexy stuff. What're most of us here for? In any case. It is a tough balance that I struggled with the whole time writing this so far. So I appreciate your kind words regarding that. Thank you! And also thanks for appreciating my own little twists on tired tropes. Wanted every species to have just a little of my original take.
In any case. I, too, hope to return to this story soon. I've been thinking a lot about the next chapters and remaining plot/character arcs. If I'm being honest, it wasn't plot that burned me out, but a struggle to maintain fresh originality when writing the sexy stuff! I just want to make sure when I write the remaining chapters, they're planned out well and hit hard. And also that I'm not tired or lazy when I write them. (Sorry about your January! Reminds me of college!)
Anyway. The content of your review is five stars. Your words all mean a lot to me! One of the happiest I've gotten on this site! Thank you!
Date: November 20 2020 10:12 AM Title: Chapter 1: Unlikely Friends
Made an account just to say I love it, please continue with it
That's extremely flattering! And I will assure you like the others: I do not intend to abandon the story. I just needed a break because I wrote too much far too quickly, and was losing enthusiasm.
Thank you for the kind words and rating!
Date: November 08 2020 11:49 PM Title: Chapter 11: Departure
I have really been enjoying this series and have been eagerly awaiting the next chapter. I really hope that it hasn't been abandoned and is just on a temporary hiatus. That said if it is permanently dropped then I had fun reading it and will remember it fondly!
Hey! Thanks so much for checking in and for the continued feedback! You were the second person to leave a review. So, it's really nice to know that I held your attention the whole way so far!
I say, "so far," because I am not abandoning this story. But it is on a longer hiatus than I had planned. I just wrote too much too fast and felt a little burnt out about it, and didn't want to force any more material until I felt inspired to write more. At the very least, I'll come up with a good place to end it.
Thanks for checking in!
Date: September 16 2020 9:13 PM Title: Chapter 11: Departure
Been a few chapters since I've left a review, but I've enjoyed everything so far. Your world building is top notch. You've taken some unique and interesting takes on some of these fantasy creatures that is proving quite entertaining.
Polite and almost overly friendly naga who seem to view it as a great privelage to act as a host. This has led to some amusing interactions so far.
Werewolves only being hostile towards humans is interesting too, and definitely points to an intelligent design behind the disease.
I think vampires being their own species is a great take as well. They also have an interesting life cycle. Starting out soft, warm, and alive, then getting gradually colder, deader, and denser as they age. Now I'm left wondering if the physical reaction by Vela's body to Leo's presence is is a normal reaction between borrowers and vampires, or if there's something special happening with those two. Definitely looking forward to what the elder has to say.
Hey! Thanks for dropping back in! You certainly don't have to review every chapter. Haha! Though I wouldn't complain. I love getting feedback, and responding to these reviews is really engaging.
And thank you so much! I consider the world building I've done to be pretty light work, but I just feel that if you're going to recycle tired fantasy species, the least you can do is give them all a bit of an imaginative spin so as to keep things feeling fresh. I guess I just didn't want a reader to be able to pop in and already know everything about Vela based on the title, 'vampire,' alone. I wanted to make being a vampire/borrower/wear wolf/naga etc. something the reader would have to learn about as they went along, while still adhering to a few, concrete pieces of each species that I think define them.
And ohhh, the guessing game. I've been really entertained by the guesses I've seen present in these reviews. It's a mixture of thrill and frustration whenever one of you gets something right, or close to it. Just shows that I'm foreshadowing effectively, I suppose, which is a tough mechanism with which to strike an appropriate balance when you aren't even really keeping notes and only have the outline of the story in your head.
All I'll say regarding your speculation is, "not bad," but I guess you'll just have to wait and see! I'm sorry I haven't produced anything new this week, but writing 65k words in less than a month is a little rough, and I needed to step away from the medium for a bit to allow my brain and enthusiasm a chance to catch up wirh my hands. And this gives everyone else a chance to catch up with what I've written as well.
As always, love reading your reviews! So thanks a lot for taking the time to make them!
Date: September 14 2020 8:37 PM Title: Chapter 1: Unlikely Friends
Great story. please continue. I'm curious leo stuck in the womb (jackie, vela);)?
my english is terrible:(
Thank you for your feedback! I certainly don't mind your English, it's good enough! And while I am a fan of deep insertion to the point of womb exploration in concept, I'm not sure I'll be going that way in this particular story. But I definitely won't count it out completely; I'll do it if it feels natural. I do want to work some more tags and scenarios in...
And don't worry. I think I'm far from finished with this story.
Date: September 14 2020 6:37 AM Title: Chapter 11: Departure
Not a fan of the full tour theme so that chapter didn't do much for me. No offense. But I'm intrigued by the changes to Vela's anatomy. It seems like her body is coming to life again. I'm curious to learn more about that. Your version of vampires are born and apparently become undead over time but evidently, the process can be reversed? I also enjoyed the nagas and their very formal, flattery based language. They're an interesting addition to this fantasy world.
Well, one person's big yes is another person's big nope with these things, so I understand that, and as one of my frequent reviewers, I really appreciate the feedback. I can say that, while I'm a fan of it myself, it's not a mechanism I plan to use often, as it's rather inconvenient for the characters in terms of being "in play" or not. But I'll be sure to mark any other chapters with full-tour if they come along so you can proceed with your own judgment. And no offense taken!
I'm glad that even though you don't appreciate the theme, you still enjoyed my justification for it in terms of story building. Part of the fun of this story so far has been that, for the most part, I've been able to tie in things like vore and even full tour to the story.
The mysterious effect Leo has on Vela's physiology does seem to be pointing to that possibility!
And I'm glad you like the nagas. I was hesitant to introduce them, but I think they've provided an interesting element both in terms of story and smut.
Thanks for all the feedback!
Date: September 13 2020 9:22 PM Title: Chapter 11: Departure
My first thoughts were that Leo would have some kind of effect on the Werewolf (if I recall correctly) parasite. Perhaps weaken the effects it has, perhaps keeping her human, or close to it, during a full moon, making her hair return to its normal color during the day. Pretty much just weakening the curse/parasite in her system. Make her a wolf-girl during a full moon, solving one of their problems for keeping her under control during a full moon. It seems like he has some sort of effect on weakening night based creatures nature, so it might stand to reason that it would have an effect on Jackie too given enough time. Though it could potentially be more dangerous as she still eats, thus he could be digested by her theoretically. So I assume that he would need to use either of the lower entrances, unless they get their hands on an anti-digestive item of some nature to protect him....
Ha! That's a really interesting theory. I'll be honest, I wasn't planning on taking it that way. And when I described the "symbiote" that infects and caused lycanthropy, I was going for something more akin to a virus that flares up with the lunar cycle. I have a reason planned for why vampires specifically seem to be effected by borrowers. But don't fret, Jackie doesn't need the excuse of a cure to have a special fondness for little people. She just has a crush on them.
Date: September 13 2020 8:28 PM Title: Chapter 11: Departure
Yay, Full tour! Hopefully Vela can get her hand back, or get a neat gauntlet to replace it. I'm hoping Jackie will get a chance to have some moments with Leo, maybe his effect on Vela can work on Jackie too. That could be interesting... Though what enterance would Leo use with Jackie... Hmmm...
Hey! I'm glad you're happy. And I briefly considered the Nagas sending her off with some gauntlet like a parting gift for her journey, but Ek-teen isn't Galadriel. Lol
and that's a curious thought. In what way do you imagine Leo would have an effect on Jackie's anatomy?
And Jackie and Leo will have plenty of quality time together in the coming chapters. I've been needing an opportunity to flesh out their relationship a little. They were too preoccupied wirh keeping her alive before!
Thanks for your follow-up review! I'm glad to see you're still enjoying this story!
Date: September 11 2020 6:24 PM Title: Chapter 11: Departure
Back again for chapters 10 and 11. Leo had a fun little adventure there. You really conveyed well the idea that the thing about the situation that's pretty erotic is just being deep within the person in a place where no one else gets to be. It's so awesome the feelings between Leo and Bela, where he loves being in her deepest depths and she loves feeling him there. The way this works with her vampiricism and and how his warmth feels extraordinary to her is great.
I'm interested to see where you're taking this storyline of Vela's body changing. We all have to wonder if she's reverting to youth or something else? And did she leave Leo behind because she could travel faster without him, or because she's afraid if she puts him in her stomach again she'll actually digest him this time? But it'll sure be a bit sad for them to be separated for so long though. Hope little Leo isn't in over his head being surrounded by all those horny nagas (and one horny werewolf).
circling back to the matter of Vela's hand for a moment, it is sad that it is gone. Though I'm reticent bro think it is gone for good. I'm thinking there might be a meddling human out there in possession of a vampire hand, maybe even one named after a color.
Hey! Welcome back! I'm so glad to hear you liked these chapters as much as the previous ones! And yeah, I've tried to convey in this story thst vore, where Leo and Vela are concerned, is an incredibly and exclusively unique experience that is as pleasurable as it is intimate and mutually beneficial. But I also wanted to use the way the nagas dealt with the hunters to demonstrate that even in this world, it can also be quite dangerous to be gulped down!
And you'll just have to see! But you're certainly an excellent guesser! On... a number of things. Wow. Imma need you to dial back on the prescience a little there, partner (Kidding, I think it's great how astute some of your assumptions are).
And whatever the nagas (and Jackie) have in store, I'm confident that Leo can handle himself! Vela wouldn't have left him in that situation if she didn't think it would be alright, regardless of how risqué it may be, not too risky!
Date: September 11 2020 2:48 AM Title: Chapter 9: Settling Depths
Sorry, I was a bit distracted and unable to come to the site for a few days, and with the 3 chapters here it looks like I missed an update. Just able to read this chapter for now, but I'll get to the others soon enough. And what a great chapter! You were really able to make it quite erotic with the double swallowing. There's something about being a tiny to someone who is a tiny to someone else that is a bit exciting. And true to the form of her species so far, the big one was quite open about very much enjoying this experience. And what the experience for Leo inside of another Naga takes her up on her idea and he's in there while they get it on lol.
i hope to read 10 and 11 soon!
You have nothing to apologize for! You don't have to leave me these wonderful reviews at all, so I'm delighted that you do no matter when you get around to it. It's always a happy surprise to open my browser and see that I've gotten another, especially from someone who has been following along!
And I've always loved the idea of a good, sultry, double-vore scenario, and the way I wrote these characters practically begged for it. And I was pleased with how I was able to "justify it" in terms of the story.
I hope you enjoy the next couple chapters too! Thanks so much for your continued feedback! I'll keep writing as long as people keep enjoying it. Until I come to a proper ending, anyway. But then I'll just start the next thing.
Date: September 09 2020 5:14 PM Title: Chapter 1: Unlikely Friends
amazing chapters. I am a little jealous of leo because of "getting to know vela very closely :)".
hehe leo and vela are Jackie's parents;)?
I can't wait for the next chapters. more please.
Thank you! And I'm quite jealous of Leo, too! I'm letting him live out a lot of my favorite fantasies. He's a lucky guy!
And Leo and Jackie are more like... Jackie's support groups. Lol.
and it's gonna take me a bit on the next chapter. I want it to be good. Thank you for all of your consistent reviews!
Date: September 09 2020 5:19 AM Title: Chapter 1: Unlikely Friends
An absolutely charming, wholesome story so far. Loving every second of it! Ive only read chapter 1 so far!
Well I'm very glad that you had such a positive experience just reading chapter 1! (Personally it's my favorite), but I still put a ton of love into the rest of them. I'm not surprised you were able to enjoy it on its own because when I wrote this, I didn't have a real plan to continue it. (Hence chapter 1 is so long and full).
I hope that you enjoy the rest of you get around to them! And thank you again for the shining review!