Reviews For A Heavy Burden
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Reviewer: azryel Signed [Report This]
Date: October 20 2018 9:45 AM Title: Chapter 1

Has this story been removed now??????

Reviewer: hai2017 Anonymous [Report This]
Date: October 10 2018 7:36 PM Title: Chapter 1

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Reviewer: Amateur Wordsmith Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 03 2013 9:05 PM Title: Chapter 1

I decided to do a full review of this story just because I can.

Anyways I like the whole blind date turned hospital run scenario. Its made better with your classic style of wit in the dialogue.

"Sure I do, no one has EVER swept me off my feet like that on the first date before." She smiled weakly

I know its normally bad to laugh at puns, but this one caught me off guard.



Author's Response: The pun fit perfectly, so I ran with it.

Reviewer: Casanova Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 03 2013 4:21 PM Title: Chapter 1

Hey UHF, I just wanted to congratulate you (and myself indirectly) for reaching the 26th week of our little contest. That's half a year of consistent writing, and I think it's obvious in both of our work how much that effort has paid off. While at times I had to drag myself to the desk to write, the external motivation provided by our bet really kept me going, and I hope you feel the same way. At this point, I almost don't care about the money (almost). Really, I'm just happy with all of the work I've put into the craft, work that I wouldn't have put in if you hadn't been such a diligent adversary. Anyway, keep up the good work, and I hope we can bring it to a full year.

P.S. I really liked the story, particularly the nice twist/crossover with the Alana Masterson story. My only gripe would be that surely Alana would have hemorrhaged out all of her blood by the time Kayla made it to the bar, let alone to the bedroom. I actually predicted that Kayla had something more sinister in mind -- like she would forego the actual execution and instead cauterize her to the heel and keep her alive indefinitely! >=)



Author's Response: Well... It was pretty violent already. If I start adding burning or acid and stuff, people might run for the hills!

As for the bet, why stop at ONE year? Twenty-Five dollars for two years of writing? I'd say I'll be getting a pretty good deal!

Reviewer: dingbing Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 03 2013 12:16 AM Title: Chapter 1

Finally, my story isn't alone in featuring a snail cameo! 



Author's Response: You know it!

Was there ever any doubt?

Reviewer: dingbing Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 26 2013 4:37 AM Title: Chapter 1

I had completely forgotten about this one. I remember reading the first chapter back when it was new and wondering where the story would go. I'm glad I noticed it again, looking forward to more!

Also looking forward to Snail Princes...

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 05 2013 10:25 PM Title: Chapter 1

At first I felt bad for Alana after what Kayla said she was gonna do to her...Aaaannndd then I read the story....

 

Yeah the bitch deserves every last horrible thing.



Author's Response: Kayla doesn't do things half-assed. That's all I'm going to say. ;)

Reviewer: jonny8107 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 05 2013 8:29 PM Title: Chapter 1

I hope Ally gets what she deserves for killing all those innocent people at the theater in the next chapter. But good story really enjoying it.

Author's Response: You will not be disappointed. ;)

Reviewer: Casanova Signed [Report This]
Date: August 05 2013 11:35 AM Title: Chapter 1

Author's Response: If you're saying I need more stories that don't focus on feet, you're in luck. I'm working on several new stories that fit that bill. And with more interesting characters! I'm always looking for ways to make my characters more interesting. Believe it or not, everything I've posted so far is only the tip of the iceberg.

To clarify: of course I'm excited about your continued focus on feet, and I'd be perfectly happy if you continued along in that vein. I was trying to make a separate point regarding the male protagonists. In the two large works you've written (and this potentially large work as well), the main character has always been a well-meaning, sometimes hapless, but always witty guy who also happens to have a foot fetish. He's a really nice guy who looks out for the female lead (who has been varied quite nicely, I might add), oftentimes with great self-sacrifice for said female lead -- but he also gets his fetish fulfilled along the way. Both Randy and David are like that, and Cliff seems to be on that path as well.

Like I said earlier, this isn't necessarily a bad thing, but one thing that you could try without changing the subject matter (feet) is having the male protagonist be quite different from this template. One example: he could be an initally evil/flawed character who inevitably gets shrunk, is put in his place by a female character's feet, and then grows out of his evil ways by the end. Sorry that I was unclear in my earlier review -- I urge you to keep writing foot-related stories ad nauseum -- I just wanted to point out that the male protagonist in your long-term works has been strikingly similar across stories.



Author's Response: I am in fact working on new stories with main characters of the darker variety. Sure, they're likable, but definitely wouldn't be mistaken for being good. The idea for this story was that Cliff would be an ordinary average guy, boring even. And then he meets a woman who is arguably his polar opposite. I'm currently working on something like a dozen stories. I'm sure at least one or two of them will go over well, hopefully.

Reviewer: Casanova Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 02 2013 10:55 AM Title: Chapter 1

I've been meaning to write a review for this story for a while now. Let me start by saying that this promises to be my favorite storyline by you yet. The premise is loaded with possibilities, and I'm excited to see where you go. More importantly, your writing continues to improve, and once again, your strong dialogue leads the way. It's life-like, natural, and oftentimes hilarious. Great job!

My only criticism would be that your male protagonists seem to be very similar to each other (not so with the female characters). This isn't necessarily a bad thing; in fact, I say this as more of an observation than anything. You've certainly mastered the always-intriguing dynamic of a foot-fetishist character having his dreams come true, and I know myself and many of your readers love that aspect of your storytelling, and how they can really fantasize with the character. Anyway, just a thought.

Overall, excellent work. I'm excited for upcoming chapters!



Author's Response: If you're saying I need more stories that don't focus on feet, you're in luck. I'm working on several new stories that fit that bill. And with more interesting characters! I'm always looking for ways to make my characters more interesting. Believe it or not, everything I've posted so far is only the tip of the iceberg.

Reviewer: GMD Signed [Report This]
Date: August 01 2013 11:54 PM Title: Chapter 1

Of course it can't be all gloom. But now that you've said it, I'm intrigued to see what you got.



Author's Response: If you're looking forward to the gloom, you won't be disappointed! I'm afraid this story will get a little dark, but that was the way I planned it from the start.

Reviewer: Carycomic Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 12 2013 1:31 PM Title: Chapter 1

Heh! I would say it's Cliff's car that almost made a BIGGER impression.

Off to chapter 2.

Author's Response: You're just now reading it? :P

Reviewer: Tunes Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 04 2013 4:16 PM Title: Chapter 1

Damn, that was intense and unexpected.  But I loved it, especially how you're bringing in questions of morality.



Author's Response: That was only the beginning. ;)

Reviewer: Dudemanguy Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 01 2013 5:50 PM Title: Chapter 1

Guess who's gonna have a bad time? Cliff.

Total guess. Honest.



Author's Response:

I'm not saying that's a bad guess. BUT, you'll have to wait and see! :P

 

He's definitely in for a surprise. That's for sure.

Reviewer: aaron Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 02 2013 7:40 PM Title: Chapter 1

What a great way to start a story.

aaron

Author's Response: Glad you like it. The original intro sucked, so I rewrote it and made it better. :)

Reviewer: wildcatman Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 02 2013 7:40 AM Title: Chapter 1

This is going to be great!  (I can 'feel' it.) ;`)



Author's Response: It will be the greatest story ever written. Move over Dickens!

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