Date: March 31 2013 5:07 PM Title: That Should Be Me
Definitely give Heather the chance to reciprocate the torture. Please, PLEASE!!!!
You would be my favoritest author ever if you did that!
You should be happy to know that I'm finally working on it. I have a beginning outline and over 700 words wrote on the 1st chapter. I dont know if I can out do myself for a sequel. I'm being very careful to not be redundant. I'm finding it hard to think in extremes because of the different personalities of the protagonists. But I'm trying.
Date: March 31 2013 1:09 AM Title: That Should Be Me
I know you are writing a sequel for this, I just had to revisit this one. I only have one thing tk say,
I REALLY wish Heather would have fucking succeeded. So fucking much.
Now you know how I feel. Damn, had to get that out.
Don't beat around the bush Dude. Tell me how you really feel. :)
Ok, since you were nice and revisited this story, I'll give you an updated progress report. I reread this story to ensure that I give the sequel synergy and accuracy. I want it to be contiguous with the first one. After I read it I thought, "Damn! How am I going to top this? I have a lot of detail in this story! And how am I going to make the sequel be unique from the first? Or should I give Heather the opportunity to reciprocate the same torture?"
I have a loose outline with some specifics. I'm stuck on what events I want to take place. I don't want to be redundant. I'd like to have enough content to make it a chapter story. No promises. I don't know how I want the story to end. Maybe when I start writing it, it'll come to me.
On a good note, since you reposted on this story and delicately displayed your emotions, it has spurred me into action to try harder and write faster. :)
Date: February 11 2013 8:42 AM Title: That Should Be Me
After seeing you on the shoutbox I figured I would give your stories a try.
I enjoyed the interaction between heather and Lauren, and the fact that the bully wins is an interesting dynamic that I feel makes the domination of heather that much more devistating to her
please continue if you can
Since I've gotten requests to continue with this story, I will. I already have something in mind. It may take awhile though. I have requests to continue other stories; stories I had no plans going back to. But that's the great thing about sharing your stories. You never know how much others are going to like them. :)
Date: January 10 2013 9:00 PM Title: That Should Be Me
Loved this story, most of the time when someone shrinks someone and turns them into a slave it is the victim of the previous relationship. I like how your story stands out from the rest with the victim staying the victim due to a mistake. I couldn't help but notice the story says it is completed. This has been one of the best I have read in a while. Please continue.
That was a great review Gtslover4! Thank you! I tried to be different with this story to be unpredictable. It could have a moral..."Don't try to get revenge". You mentioned that this was one of the best stories you've read in a while, if so take a look at my other posts and see if they compare to this story. I hope my style of writing will keep you entertained. After all, that's why we read and write...yes?
Date: January 10 2013 12:11 PM Title: That Should Be Me
fantastic job on the story. I kind of liked how u jumped right into the story. Because this sadly could be a one and done story I saw a intro in their history was unnecessary, it was clear they disliked each other. I found this to be a great story but sad to see it end so soon. Still for a one ch story that sure was HOT. hope u continue to make similar stories involving F/F
Thank you Afroking. Whenever I read your name, I think of the huge afro on the guy in the movie called Undercover Brother. :) I think you have a fun pen name. You're in luck Afroking. I have another F/F story posted called Interesting and another prewritten story that has F/F yet to be posted. I might even have outlines for other F/F stories yet to be written.
Thanks for flawless review!
Date: January 08 2013 2:42 PM Title: That Should Be Me
What another great story. I must say, you clearly describe them in detail but maybe a little more detail on their past history would have been nice(?) Me being A nerd too, I really did wish Heather would have shrunk Lauren. I am not the biggest fan of accidental problems causing the poor defenseless (insert name here) being shrunk and tortured. I like to see the weaker character gain the power (but not in a sibling rivalry) so this story was not very appealing to me.
But still an excellent story, don't take it the wrong way!
Thanks Dudemanguy. I'm glad that you're able to judge a story based on what it is and not so much your personal tastes. You're a very objective reviewer and I appreciate that. Being a writer yourself, you know it's impossible to meet everyones needs. I agree that I should've put more history in for the protagonists but I get impatient with myself and sometimes take things for granted. I dont want to insult the reader by explaining too much on something they may have an understanding of and I tend to jump into the "meat" of the story. I'm learning that I need to pace better and not take things for granted (the history in this case).
Thanks for giving me your true opinion but with kid's gloves. :)