[Report This]Date: August 06 2023 7:56 PM Title: Chapter 6 - Sweet Release
I thought this chapter was very much a cleverly written one.
I really like how the return of Livy's memories was handled. Throughout this story, her sense of familiarity with Missy was mostly implied through her intense attraction to the little domme and her gradual acceptance and building comfort with her situation, with only the occasional thought about how familiar Missy giving the reader more measured direction as to the true nature of their relationship. So it only made sense that we would see her memories returning before we're told that's the case.
Olivia shouting Missy's actual name in an intense sexual rant is really good use of the "show, don't tell' writing philosophy. We're told that she had a "realization" just a couple of paragraphs before, but it isn't until she says that name (and the way that she uses it) that we're clued in to the revival of Pet's memories and just how she feels about the tiny woman in her vagina. Then, we're told some of the details of the relationship between the two in a nice blend of narrative and dialogue. And even then, that's handled in a non-expositional manner, engaging the reader by relaying details somewhat gradually and in a way that almost assumes we knew the information the whole time.
I really enjoy stories that ask their readers to infer things and piece information together, and this one has done that exceptionally well, especially for one that, at least on the surface, is more focused on smut than plot. This has been really surprising and much appreciated.
The way you approached the insertion part of this chapter was also pretty smart, I thought. I've been praising your descriptions so far in this story (as I should have!), but it was that particular description's organization that really impressed me here. When Missy first meets Livy's lower lips, we become very familiar with the giant sex through Melissa's eyes (and arm), thanks to a detailed, thorough description that doesn't overstay its welcome. Then, Olivia takes her away for some more fun with her mouth. The earlier tease is then finally paid off when we get straight to brass tax, not needing all of those details told to us again once the real action starts. This allowed for the reader to easily envision where Missy was going while having the benefit of focusing much more on the action and our characters reaction to it. I feel like spacing things out like this really maximized the intensity of the scene, building us up with an intricate tease, then throwing us right into the thick of it.
And, as has been a growing trend in this story, I absolutely love the way that Olivia casually dominates Missy with her body. The brief mention of her sitting up for the first time and Missy tumbling between her legs, almost like an afterthought, really drives home the casualness of the act, as does the tiny woman's struggle to stand on her body every time the giant woman laughs. The occasional playful taunts from Livy, by contrast, serve to really set a particular mood to the scene. These two seemingly contradicting reactions are balanced out pretty well in this story (and particularly in this chapter) impressively.
As for the story itself, I'm glad I was right about Olivia and Mistress's relationship. The chemistry between these two characters is adorable, and they seem like a really fun couple. I had a feeling Livy was responsible for Aidra, but that was more of a guess than a deduction, so I kept that to myself. When the giantess gave the sexbot a command and said command was followed, however, that confirmed pretty much everything I had thought about Livy, Missy, and Aidra up to that point (and this was also a really subtle and clever way of cluing the reader in on the coming reveal).
I have to admit, the business aspect of this I didn't see coming. That was a nice little twist to the story. Also, we heard a couple of new names dropped during that bit of dialogue. I'm wondering if we'll possibly get to meet these other characters at some point in the future or if they were brought up simply as an exercise in worldbuilding.
Overall, this was a phenomenal chapter in a phenomenal story. I'm almost sad to see it coming to an end, but I'm pretty excited to see what you have mind to close this one out!
Author's Response:
Thank you again for your kind words and considerate feedback! I can only hope the conclusion continues to tickle your fancy.
This story was definitely a step outside my wheelhouse, and outside my comfort zone. I've written a few fantasy stories I've shared with friends, but this is my first time writing anything of a lewd nature, or anything pertaining to macro/microphilia. Your feedback has given me the confidence to keep bumbling forward. I'm going to be busy over the next few weeks, but I fully expect I'll be back to contribute again. If you see a second story from me, you can take pride in the fact that whenever I'm asked where I got the confidence to take another shot, I can say with respect and appreciation that It Was Me.