[Report This]Date: August 26 2023 4:21 PM Title: Chapter 2
Really interesting from the get-go. That opening scene was beautifully detailed and provided everything I could want out of a mouth/vore scene (the one in chapter two was excellent as well), and I love the effort you put into establishing the sheer difference in size and power between the fairy and the giantess.
Your diction, as well as the character's names, does a great job of conveying the fae aesthetic. It makes for really strong visuals throughout the story.
Love how magic is described as strings connecting everything together. It's a visually intriguing way of depicting how magic is performed and viewed.
I was not expecting that gut-wrenching reveal at the end of the second chapter. It makes for an enticing motivation for the witch to eat more fairies, and I look forward to seeing where this story goes from here.
Author's Response:
Thanks so much! I really try to emphasize size difference, so thanks for noticing!
I hope the story goes in a direction you enjoy :) I'm excited too!
[Report This]Date: August 23 2023 10:31 AM Title: Chapter 2
My oh my, that is a delicious motivation for the titular "villain" of the story. I did not expect such a heart-wrenching introduction to the witch. I feel sorry for her. Though I feel worse for all the fairies she must have consumed in a futile effort to live in the past, like the delightful little Sage. If only Avalee could see past what I assume is her grief, she might have found a new friend somewhere along the way, but it's as if she sees these fairies as short-lived batteries, rather than individuals. So sad.
This chapter raises a few questions for me, some obvious which I hope to see answered, and one or two that would have been nice to have answered in context.
1) What happened to the forest around the cottage, and by extension, Hannah?
2) Will the witch have any use for Willow, since she hasn't attuned?
2.5) Will the Witch try to help Willow attune, so she can make use of her?
3) Where did this ritual magic come from?
4) Could a fairy have helped conduct the ritual without becoming a snack, and did Avalee ever try to convince one?
5) Why did Sage not try to fly away? Was she weak from her time in captivity, spellbound by Avalee, or was there another reason?
Thanks for continuing this story, you have an interesting approach with these characters. I like their motivations, and see potential for them to help each other, though whether that is acted upon, and whether or not betrayal is to follow, I look forward to discovering. Keep up the great work!
Author's Response:
Wow, what a thoughtful review! I continue to be starstruck. Thanks so much for taking the time to write this.
You're asking all the right questions! I'm really happy to see that I'm sewing the right seeds. The only "unintentional" one was 5, which is definitely something that should have been directly answered in the chapter. I'll probably patch that in later.
Once again, thanks for the feedback! I don't have as much time to write as I'd like, but these characters live rent free in my brain all the time, and I want their stories told. Thanks for reading!