[Report This]Date: August 07 2023 8:34 PM Title: Ending 1: Part 2
Having read the review below, my initial impression after finishing the latest chapter was to agree about including David's (and maybe even Courtney's) perspective here. in fact, I had the same thought before I even read said review. The more I think about it, though, the less sure I am about that.
Sure, there's a morbid curiosity as their mental states a year after becoming Emily's feet, but honestly, after a year of it, they've probably already adapted to their new hell. Seeing things from their POV would be more impactful if this chapter started a day or maybe even a week later, when this new type of suffering was still new.
Also, given that Emily's feet spend most of the chapter in her old shoes, their perspective would probably be a pretty boring one from a narrative standpoint. And in terms of fetish content, it would basically amount to the same thing we've read during David's ordeal, except that he wouldn't be going through the physical pain and fear of being crushed like he did the last time he was in Emily's shoe. So, in other words, it seems as though it would be a less exciting retread of previous chapters.
I'm not saying that adding their perspectives wouldn't have added anything at all, but even as I'm typing this, I personally feel that giving us the details from Emily's side and leaving us to imagine what her feet are going through was the better choice.
As for the chapter itself, I like that Emily's subconscious seems like it's trying to push through memories of David but can't. It gives a superficial undertone to her newfound happiness, like it's part of her "new programming" rather than something legitimate.
I also like how her conversation with Kelsey was handled. It looks like she's started to pretend that she knew them at all, probably so people will stop looking at her so weird. That was a nice touch, as it implies that she's been asked about this a lot, which is something you would expect.
But yeah, even though Emily's happiness was likely at least implanted, I was glad to see at least one character come out of this at least kind of okay. Then the slip of paper came under the door, and I assumed that this is how Caitlin has been keeping tabs on her. But then I saw that her trial pays $200 an hour.
Oh.
It looks like the good doctor might be trying to tie up loose ends. After all, we know why David was offered that much money. And the last sentence of the chapter was especially sad, given that she was cursing herself for being all about the trial money in the last chapter. With her memory wiped, she's doomed to make the same mistake again, only this time it looks like she's going to take David's place.
Author's Response:
Thanks again for such a detailed review. Next time you leave one, I'd like to know if your name is a JoJo reference lol. Very apt perspective on why I didn't write a pov for David or Courtney! In general, you're great at picking up on the subtle hints and little details!
[Report This]Date: August 07 2023 6:11 PM Title: Chapter 1
So it was a fantastic story and the ending part 1 was fantastic! Part 2 I wanna give a small critique. While the writing is fantastic from Emily’s perspective, I feel like there should have been a few lines from David and Courtney’s perspective from a year later too. Like have they accepted life, do they still have their sanity. Do they have hope or finally hopeless etc. The writing was perfect, but I felt the added perspectives from the victims, even if short, would have been good. I can see Courtney having her mind snapped as it was so sudden, and David maybe fighting for hope still.
Author's Response:
I thought about it, and might go back and add it! Just couldn't figure out a place to put it.
[Report This]Date: August 07 2023 5:48 AM Title: Ending 1: Part 2
Love the whole story, always a fan of unaware situations/scenarios. I like how throughout the chapters there are great description of each women who uses him. Although I'd love to see an alternate ending where he would remain in his tiny human form. Since he's disgusted by feet, maybe the experiment goes in another direction, like turning his hatred into pleasure to help the user. By making the clueless girls test a new "tiny sweat and smell doll" that they can use for their feet. With the intense physical feet interaction, the girls would use him unaware that they're also rubbing his most precious "pride" between his legs. Emily would love this "tiny doll" that somehow looks like david, and plus it can clean her feet as well. The hard thing between it's legs, is great to use between her toes. All of this while David tries to keep his sanity and fight this losing battle of wasting his seed into the crevices of Emily's smelly, dirty toes and other women's feet as well.
Author's Response:
Thank you so much for your review. That's an interesting concept!
[Report This]Date: August 05 2023 4:44 AM Title: Ending 1: Part 1
Man, with how this chapter went down, I half-expected the Crypt Keeper to pop up at the end of this chapter and make some stupid pun, like, oh, I don't know, "Well, it looks like David and Courtney are learning the agony of ... de-FEET. Ah, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
You know, I have a strong preference for happy endings, and I was actually glad to see that this was only Ending 1, which leaves some hope that Ending 2 will go down a happier route. But let's be honest, even if Ending 2, in its entirety, goes like this:
Part 1
He dead.
Part 2
He still dead.
... it'll still be happier than this one. This is clearly a fate worse than death, one I couldn't have predicted (and I thought of some scenarios that might play out). I mean, not only are David and Courtney going to spend the rest of their lives in absolutely agony, but David is also going to have to see the woman he loves, who he knows loves him back (I know it was important to Emily to get that out, but it probably only made things worse for David in retrospect), forget about him entirely, move on, and fall in love with someone else. Damn, that's brutal!
But, after saying all of that, while I don't like this ending in the sense that it's definitely not how I wanted to see this story end, I can absolutely appreciate how great it is in an objective sense.
As I said above, this was ending was completely unpredictable, but it fit the story up to this point so well, and it just made so much sense. All of the torture David went through up to this point was just a prelude to this, and Caitlin's gradually revealed sadism makes it totally plausible that she would do something like this (and hire others who would be cool with it, too).
Also, the nature of David and Emily's relationship, as we've seen it throughout the story, makes her confession (and David's unheard confession) really hit home. It was well developed, even though we don't really see the two of them knowingly interact before this point beyond chapter 2.
We get to know Courtney just well enough to actually give a fuck about her, so while she's kind of an after thought, I still feel bad for her.
And knowing that Caitlin's villain monologue was really more of a taunt of David and Courtney, as Emily is going to forget all of it, just makes her that much more evil.
However, this ending does leave a couple of questions:
Won't people who know both Emily and David ask her about him? She may not know what, but she's going to know something's up when people keep trying to tell her about this dude that she doesn't know exists.
The same goes for Courtney. Won't it be weird when her teammates are talking about her going missing, and Emily asks, "Who the fuck is that?"
If they could just take Courtney like that, why did it take so long to get a dude for the experiment? Couldn't they have just taken some random guy, or, better yet, scouted out someone that's likely to not be missed?
And this last one is more of just a curiosity, but if Caitlin had made good on her threat to graft Emily to her foot, would Courtney and David have still been alive or would that have killed them?
I don't know, maybe I'm overthinking those first few questions. I don't want to take away from what I again thought was, at least in the technical sense, a really good ending. I just found myself wondering about those first two once it became clear that Emily was going to forget them altogether.
Oh, and I think it was definitely a good call to go with the cruel ending first in this case. Even if Ending 2 is super happy, it'll make it even more so. And if it's not, it'll still look happier compared to this one. I don't know if the inverse would have been true if the cruelest ending was the last one (maybe I'm getting ahead of myself saying that this is the crueler ending, but I don't know how you could get much darker than this one).
Anyway, enough ranting from me. I'll be interested to see David and Courtney's new hell in the next chapter, and I'm definitely looking forward to whatever Ending 2 has to offer!
Author's Response:
Thank you so much for your incredibly in depth review, both this one and the other you left on my other story! You actually covered some very important points that I hope I provided sufficient coverage for in the story refresh! I wish I could give you a reward of some kind on this site for a good review lol, but just know I would give you 5 stars if I could!
[Report This]Date: August 04 2023 5:12 PM Title: Chapter 1
As much as I like cruel endings, I also enjoy good ones. Maybe an alternate ending after? Where she ends up taking care of David, but he’s stuck at that size and Caitlin and the company vanish w/o a trace so he can’t be regrown?
Author's Response:
There's alternate endings in the cards!
Date: July 26 2023 6:28 AM Title: Chapter 8
[Report This]Date: July 16 2023 2:26 AM Title: Chapter 7
Another great chapter! Can’t wait to see what happens next.
[Report This]Date: July 14 2023 9:37 PM Title: Chapter 6
This has quickly become one of my all-time favorite unaware stories! I can't wait to see where you go with this!
Author's Response:
Thank you so much!
[Report This]Date: July 13 2023 10:51 PM Title: Chapter 6
Awesome cliff hanger! I was hoping he’d get stuck and found at home by Emily.
Great story!
Any chance of Caitlyn getting a turn at dominating poor David?
Author's Response:
Thank you so much for the review! That may be a possibility, but we'll have to see. Could always come back to the concept with some alternate endings!
[Report This]Date: July 10 2023 10:13 AM Title: Chapter 1
This has been of my favorite new stories. I really hope you finish up this story! Can't wait to see what happens next - I wonder if Emily will eventually notice David during the experiment.
Author's Response:
Hold me accountable if I don't finish this one, I fully intend to see it through! Thank you so much for your review.
[Report This]Date: July 03 2023 12:36 PM Title: Chapter 1
Any chance we could see David get crushed under her foot a fair bit?
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review! You'll love the new chapter coming soon ;)
[Report This]Date: July 01 2023 8:55 PM Title: Chapter 1
Great concept, great story!
I'm interested to see how it ends, and if we see the other girls again.
Author's Response:
Thank you for your review!
Date: July 01 2023 2:59 PM Title: Chapter 5
very good story Emily could be better if she noticed David
Date: July 01 2023 5:03 AM Title: Chapter 1
After she discovers is I'd set up the second part of the experiment, David shrunk to 2 mm, and Emily decides to continue the experiment for the science, although she knows is suffering.
Author's Response: Thanks for your ideas! We'll see where things go ;)
[Report This]Date: June 29 2023 1:17 AM Title: Chapter 1
Awesome Man. Can't wait to read on! Especially with Emily and if after she finds out!
Author's Response:
Thank you so much for your feedback!
Date: June 28 2023 9:33 PM Title: Chapter 1
Fantastic story so far! Can’t wait to read more :)
Author's Response:
Thank you for your kind words!
[Report This]Date: June 28 2023 6:46 PM Title: Chapter 3
Great story so far, it's well written and the concept is good too. I look forward to reading more.
Author's Response:
I appreciate the review, glad to hear you like it!
[Report This]Date: June 28 2023 9:39 AM Title: Chapter 3
Amazing chapter, i love this kind of unaware story. Can't wait for chapter 3
Author's Response:
Glad to hear you liked it!