Reviews For Her Sandwich
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Reviewer: D W Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: November 29 2022 3:46 AM Title: Her Sandwich

This story line is great, but it is discombobulated.  You are writing one continuous story under different titles.  You need to tie all your stories together.  Chose a heading, such as "The Adventures of Kale and Jerry", then write all your sub-stories under that heading.

People reading this posting have no idea of your previous postings unless they happened to have read them, like I have.  There is no cohesion between your stories because you are posting chapters as separate story line.  You would be best posting them all under one title, and subsequent chapters, rather than independent stories.

If I may make a suggestion, go back to your original posting and add all your following stories as following chapters to that one.

This chapter was really nice, being eaten by the girl and passed through her bowels.  It seems Kale and Jerry both look upon this girl as their FLAWLESS, SUPREME GODDESS!

Reviewer: Her-chocolatebar Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: November 29 2022 2:56 AM Title: Her Sandwich

omg!!! that was truly brilliant!

What I would do to trade places… Just for the opportunity to be her next sandwich!

You wouldn't happen to have this sweet girls phone number at all, would you? :-

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Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.